Political Championship Wrestling

11/21-PCW Extreme Political TV on P-SPAN: Soccer’s Going Rogue, New Moon Frolics, Bipartisan Dream Teams

Posted on November 22, 2009 by Political Championship Wrestling

PCW Extreme Political TV
‘The Palace of Political Extreme’ aka PCW Hall
Saturday November 21st
Host: Johnny Suave

PCW RANKINGS

PCW WORLD CHAMPION: ‘Hollywood A-Lister’ Stone Chism (Progressive Alliance)
PCW TELEVISION CHAMPION: SNAFU (Independent)
CONTENDERS:
#1- Starz N. Stripes (Progressive Alliance)
#2- Khalid-El (Axis of Evil)
#3- Bird ‘The Mark’ Ridfych (Independent)
#4- Newt Tron Bomb (American Patriots)
#5- American Trucker (American Heartland Coalition)
#6- ‘The King of Old School Gimmicks’ Baron Von Munchke (Old School Kings)

PCW TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS: ‘No Frills’ Chris Escondido and Starz N. Stripes (Progressive Alliance)
PCW TAG TEAM TELEVISION CHAMPIONS: Big Oil and Big Electric (Public Utilities)
CONTENDERS:
#1- A. Tom Bomb and Hy Drogen Bomb (American Patriots)
#2- Midnite Rockin’ Xpress- Bobby Ricky Michaels/Marty Gibson-Lane (Old School Kings)
#3- Jack and Bull Schett (Ron Paul’s New Libertarian Army)
#4- NCISF’d
#5- Extreme Weather Network-Steve Abrams/Mike Bettis (EWN)
#6- The Goatbusters (Island of Misfit Wrestlers)

Suave notes the rise of American Trucker to #5 after his win over Baron Von Munchke who drops from #4 to #6.

WWR RANKINGS
TAG TEAM TOP 25
1. The Entourage (Spike Saunders/Callie Urban)- FWO* 37
2. Vox Nihili (Alias & Karina Wolfenden)- FWO       36
3. The Anthology(Jared Wells & Larry Tact)- EPW 34
4. Chris Escondido/Kevin Scott- PCW *      32
5. Hollywood Wrecking Crew- NFW 31
21. Public Utilities(Big Oil/Big Electric)- PCW **     13.1

MEN’S TOP 30
51. SNAFU- PCW ** 51.1
54. ‘Hollywood A-Lister’ Stone Chism- PCW * 50.2

Suave congratulates Escondido and Scott, Public Utilities, and all those who made the rankings.

Tonight on PCW Extreme Political TV:
American Trucker (American Heartland Coalition) vs. Newt Tron Bomb (American Patriots)

The Goatbusters vs. The Extreme Weather Network

Blue Dog D (Progressive Alliance) and Rino (American Patriots) vs. ‘Raving Rednecks’ Locke and Loade (American Patriots)

Suave reviews the New Mexico soccer incident involving Elizabeth Lambert…

…and the recent World Cup Qualifying controversy involving France’s Thierry Henry.

MATCH #1
New Mexico soccer player Elizabeth Lambert
vs.
France soccer player Thierry Henry
Henry gains control due to a test of strength. Henry with chops to Lambert, he grabs a headlock takedown which quickly becomes a headscissors. Lambert escapes with some well-placed elbows and both are up. Lambert runs off the ropes and tries a shoulder block. Nothing. She tries again. Same result. Lambert tries kicking him first but this time Henry takes her down. Lambert runs off the ropes, Henry catches the leapfrog attempt and turns it into a fireman’s carry cutter. Fist drop by Henry, a scoop slam and a second rope knee drop which misses. Lambert wraps Henry’s leg in the ropes then dropkicks it. Shinbreaker by Lambert! Lambert out to grab a chair and back in. Henry manages gets loose. Lambert clobbers him with the chair. Henry staggers back to his corner. What? He’s raising the white flag? Johnny Suave utters his first ‘HOLY CRAP’ of the night. Lambert yanks Henry by what hair he has and throws him face first to the mat. The referee calls for the bell. Kicks by Lambert now and she doesn’t let up. The ref tries to pull Lambert off Henry. Lambert elbows him in the stomach. Lambert bends down and starts bouncing Henry’s head off the canvas. The bell rings a second time. Lambert continues to assault Henry.

The announcement is made that Lambert won the match due to Henry submitting. Suddenly, an enraged Zinedine Zidane runs into the ring and verbally abuses the referee. HEAD BUTT to the referee! Zidane grabs Lambert and pulls her off Henry. Zidane goes for a head butt. Lambert eludes and takes a free kick right to Zidane’s balls. Mercifully, security finally intervenes before more bloodshed and a possible international incident results.

WINNER: Elizabeth Lambert in 2:35

Suave then reviews the recent release of The Alaskan Pitbull’s new book, Going Rogue, and then replays Bill Clinton’s Hot Tub from a few weeks back.

(Replay from 10/7-PCW EXTREME POLITICAL TV- PART 2)
BILL CLINTON’S HOT TUB
Slick Announcer Guy: “And now, it’s time for our new feature on PCW Extreme Political TV, Bill Clinton’s Hot Tub. And here’s your host, Bill Clinton.” Clinton, inside a steaming hot tub, waves to the audience. Clinton: “Good evening. Tonight on our new show, Bill Clinton’s Hot Tub, we are damn lucky to have one of the most polarizing figures in American politics today. And even better, she’s hot looking! Former Alaska Governor Sarah Palin!” The camera pans over to Palin who seems a little uncomfortable with the whole arrangement. Her clothes are stacked up by the side of the hot tub and she tries to keep as low as possible inside the hot tub. Clinton: “Governor Palin, I am profoundly appreciative that you came on my show tonight.” Palin: “Um…thank you, President Clinton. But, was it really necessary for both of us to take all of our clothes off?” Clinton: “Well, it all depends on what your definition of ‘clothes’ is. Is it a metaphoric reference to cover up what we really feel inside or is it more of an issue of not wanting to totally put yourself out there?” Palin: “Riiiight. You betcha. Can we get to my book?” Clinton reaches over and grabs a copy of Palin’s new book, Going Rogue. Clinton: “From her humble beginnings to her time in the spotlight as the first female Republican Vice Presidential candidate, Sarah Palin has led an extraordinary life. Going Rogue will recount her political experiences, her time as Mayor of Wasilla and as the first female governor of Alaska, as well as her rapid rise on the national stage during the 2008 campaign. Additionally, she’ll share insights into the personal challenges she’s faced including balancing her time as a working mother, recognizing the war’s impact with her son serving combat in Iraq, having a child with a disability and supporting her teenage daughter through an unplanned pregnancy.” Palin: “I just wanted to tell my side of the story and share the experiences that I’ve gone through over the past year of so.” Clinton: “Very intriguing. Going Rogue. I think I’d like your book better if you called it Going Commando. BWHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHHAHAHA” Palin: “Mr. President, that’s not the least bit funny.” Clinton: “BWHAHAHAHAHAHA…haha… hahaha….ha ha……ha…………..ha…oh, all right. You-a…you became a lightning rod for any number of groups. Some thought you were refreshing. Others didn’t think you were ready for prime time. You believe this book tells us all about the real Sarah Palin? Palin: “Yes I do. It’s about growing up in Alaska, meeting Todd, running for office, addresses my beliefs in faith and family, um, the book is about who I am.” Clinton: “All right, before we go, I have to ask you a favor.” Palin: “Um…what?” Clinton: “Can you do that whole put your hands in the air thing you did on Saturday Night Live?” Palin: “Not right at this moment.” Clinton: “Shucks. Okay, that’s it for Bill Clinton’s Hot Tub. Tune in next week when-” Hillary’s Voice: “WILLIAM JEFFERSON CLINTON!” Clinton: “Oh ****. Hillary doesn’t know I have company. Can you kind of go under the water for a few seconds and…” Palin: “I don’t think so.” Hillary enters, none too happy. Clinton: “Hi honey, how you do-” *CLANG* Hillary connects with a frying pan to the mush.

Suave: “And we’re back. That was intellectually stimulating…okay…it was stimulating, but we won’t get into details…

—————————————–

The Alaska Pitbull’s new book is called ‘Going Rogue.’ Click here to go to Amazon’s web site to look.

And while you’re there (cheap plug…cheap plug…) check out this book as well. Loose Cannons

There are some books you curl up with on a warm couch to read.

This isn’t one of them.

Released just in time for the presidential election but stil relevant in today’s dysfunctional political atmosphere, Loose Cannons and Other Weapons of Mass Political Destruction is an independent call to arms, a rowdy, hard-hitting, no holds barred satire that finally puts politics in proper perspective- by equating it to professional wrestling. Or in other terms, it’s a book you can crack open a six of beer and crank up the music to enjoy a humorous and occasionally biting political satire.

A dark cloud has covered the American political landscape. The powerful forces of professional partisans, political operatives, and special interest groups have combined to polarize the electorate into two bitterly divided extreme camps while many people tune out of the political process altogether.

However, DeWayne Cantrell isn’t like most people.

Co-owner with Bubba Jackson of the world’s only political pro wrestling federation, Buckland County Extreme Wrestling, DeWayne, a reformed politician himself, skewers the political world on a weekly basis on the BCEW wrestling show. But when powerful United States Senator David Hutchinson gets wind of what Cantrell is doing, DeWayne finds himself being subpoenaed to appear before a Senate sub-committee on the ‘Media and Their Contribution to the Coarseness of the American Culture.’ It is only after a heated exchange with Senator Hutchinson at the contentious hearing that DeWayne realizes that it’s no joke anymore.

Cantrell then throws his hat into the political ring and challenges Hutchinson for his Senate seat. Can DeWayne stand up for the little guy against the establishment of both political parties and stick it to the Washington D.C. elites? To what lengths will the professional politicians and their special interest groups go to stop him?

And will American politics ever be the same?

NOTE: We’d like to reassure everyone that no actual American Congressman, Senator, President, aides, political pundits, know-it-all celebrity political pundits, pompous cable TV personalities, right wing or left wing talk show hosts, reality show contestants, Weather Channel personalities, or skanky rich bimbos were injured in the making of this book.

———–

Suave notes as an FYI, several current PCW characters are in Loose Cannons including him, Dawn McGill, Justin Sufferable, Chris Escondido, Starz N. Stripes aka Kevin Scott and many more.

—————————-
COMMERCIAL BREAK
_________________

Dream Wrestling Federation

DARK MATCHES
Remy Leroux vs. Jay Price
Charlie Blackwell vs. Max Douglas
Zero vs. Daymare

SLAUGHTER TELEVISION TAPING
Casey Pierro-Zabatol vs. Force
Bishop Steele vs. Upton Osgood
Cancer Jiles vs. Billy Wilson w/Bob Wilson
Adrien Cochrane vs. Travis Williams

Doozer vs. Marshall
DWF World Championship

Lupin Cy vs. 501
DREAM Championship Match

Dunkin’ Donuts Center – Providence, RI
November 23, 2009 12:00 AM

“Perfect” Paul Paras v Aceldama©
The referee for this match is Mystery Ref, and the rules are Street Fight Match.

Holmes v Erites Kallisten
The referee for this match is Romeo Ward, and the rules are Standard Match.

Golden Phoenix v Black Mamba
The referee for this match is Frank Tsonga, and the rules are Standard Match.

Doozer v Jason Midnight
The referee for this match is Romeo Ward, and the rules are Standard Match.

Graystone v Tim Shipley
The referee for this match is Frank Tsonga, and the rules are Standard Match.

_______________________

Replay from last week: Shaun Phillips and T-Bag (American Patriots) vs. Blue Dog D (Progressive Alliance) and RINO (American Patriots)
Suave: “Phillips still down after taking a Gore from RINO. Blue Dog D with a running lariat and that bounces T-Bag hard off the mat. Blue Dog D walks around him…he’s measuring him…” Blue Dog D pulls T-Bag up and tucks his head under his armpit. He hoists him up, and then falls back onto the floor. Suave: “FILIBUSTER BUSTER! FILIBUSTER BUSTER! COVER! DAVEY KEELS COUNTS…1 …2 …3!“

Replay from last week:“The Raving Rednecks” Locke and Loade (American Patriots) vs. Mr. Jaundice and Captain Nausea w/Movie Classic (Island of Misfit Wrestlers)
Suave: “LOCKE GOT HIM WITH THE HIP TOSS. MR. JAUNDICE SCRAMBLES TO THE CORNER AND TAGS IN CAPTAIN NAUSEA. Captain Nausea in…he whips Locke to the corner. Mr. Jaundice gets a cheap shot from behind. Captain Nausea sets up…elbowdrop. Mr. Jaundice runs back in…he drops the leg Locke. Gary Loade’s had enough. He’s in. HE DDT’S CAPTAIN NAUSEA TO THE MAT! LOCKE AND LOADE HAVE HIM UP…HERE IT COMES…WHAM! FOUR-D REDNECK DEATHBLAST! LOCKE COVERS…1 …2 …3!”

BACKSTAGE
American Patriots Leader Eric Cantor implores the Raving Rednecks Locke and Loade to defeat the BiPartisan Dream Team. Cantor, Chief Deputy Whip Kevin McCarthy (R-Calif.), Rep. Mary Bono Mack (R-Calif.) and Rep. Paul Broun (R-Ga.) oppose the Progressive Alliance’s plan to provide universal health insurance to PCW roster members. RINO and Blue Dog D favor compromise on a health insurance plan as long as its fiscally responsible.

MATCH #2
Blue Dog D (Progressive Alliance) and RINO (American Patriots)
vs.
‘Raving Rednecks’ Locke and Loade (American Patriots)
Locke gets control very early with a knee to the face and a running neckbreaker. A pair of clotheslines by Locke, RINO tries to toss him over the top but he skins the cat and comes back in with a flying forearm. ARRIBA! Locke tosses RINO out but HE skins the cat…and gets kicked in the face. Locke low-bridges Blue Dog D and Locke gets an assisted crossbody to the floor on both men. Back inside, Loade gets some chops to RINO and then an inverted atomic. Loade drops his head too early and gets kicked in the face, the tag is made to Blue Dog D who hits a SILKY flying European. Loade comes back with a back elbow and a pair of clotheslines, tag is made to Locke and they hit a series of double teams culminating in a knee drop for 2 by Locke. Blue Dog D gets some forearms to regain control, he calls for RINO but Locke runs through the double team and clotheslines both men. All 4 men in the ring, they hang Blue Dog D in the tree of woe and whip RINO into him! EWWWW they crotche RINO on the face of Blue Dog D, then RINO falls on top of him in a…shall we say compromising position? I think we shall. Locke gets a boot up to a charging Blue Dog D, but Blue Dog D comes back with some forearms and whips Locke into RINO’ knee. RINO is in now, back elbow by RINO. Tag back to Blue Dog D, what the hell are they doing? They just did a tour of Locke’s hands and feet…never mind it was dumb. Whip to Locke, Blue Dog D hits a knee in the corner followed by a big boot by RINO and a knee drop by Blue Dog D. RINO is the legal man and gets a 2 count. RINO slaps around Locke and gets his teeth rearranged with a superkick. Tag to Loade, clothesline! A pair! A trio! Baaaaaack body drop. Inverted atomic for RINO! He is a House~! En! FUEGO~!! Chop for Blue Dog D and a Blockbuster gets 2. Whip to RINO and Locke kicks him in the back of the head from the apron. Double team suplex! Assisted uranage slam by Loade gets two before RINO breaks it up. RINO and Blue Dog D set for the Flibuster Buster, Eric Cantor now ringside and up on the ring apron. Locke uses the distraction to hit a low blow. Locke lifts RINO up…4-D REDNECK DEATHBLAST! Loade gets the rollup for 3!

WINNER: ‘Raving Rednecks’ Locke and Loade in 7:22

Post match, the Green World Order (GreenPete, Extreme Vegan Brock Cole Lee, PeaceNick, and Peta from PETA) run-in. Cantor vacates. Lee and GreenPete eject Locke and Loade forceably from the ring. PeaceNick protests the violent manner of which Lee and GreenPete forceably eject Locke and Loade from the ring. Peta just screams out “”THANKSGIVING IS MURDER ON TURKEYS!” over and over. Crowd: “PEOPLE EATING (clap, clap clap-clap-clap) TASTY ANIMALS! (clap, clap clap-clap-clap) Peta shouts out her alternative: “THE TOFURKY ROAST! THE BEST-SELLING TURKEY ALTERNATIVE Crowd: “PEOPLE EATING (clap, clap clap-clap-clap) TASTY ANIMALS! (clap, clap clap-clap-clap) Peta: “SHUT UP! THE TOFURKY ROAST IS A PRE-COOKED VEGETARIAN ROAST-” Crowd: “BOOOOOOOO!” Peta: “IS MADE FROM A TOFU-WHEAT PROTEIN BLEND-” Crowd: “BOOOOOOOOO!” Peta: “IT HAS AN INCREDIBLE TURKEY-LIKE TEXTURE AND FLAVOR-” Voice: “SHUT UP! JUST SHUT UP ALREADY!”

Politically Incorrect (‘The Princess of Political Incorrectness’ Andrea Doria, Al Cahall, and Nic Koteen) come out with a cooked turkey ready to be eaten. Crowd: “PEOPLE EATING (clap, clap clap-clap-clap) TASTY ANIMALS! (clap, clap clap-clap-clap) Cahall tells Peta that people are tired of being badgered by others telling them what they can eat, drink, and think. Cahall: “Just shut up. Don’t eat meat if that’s your choice. But leave people alone. Things are bad enough without zealots like you telling them what to do.” Koteen, in between puffs from his cigarette, starts throwing slabs of turkey meat to the crowd. Crowd: “RRRRRAHAHHHHHHHHHHHH!” Peta throws a fit. Peta: “STOP THAT! STOP IT!” GreenPete and Brock Cole Lee hop out of the ring and confront Politically Incorrect. GreenPete knocks over the wagon holding the turkey. Cahall takes the baster and squirts turkey juice in his eyes. Andrea Doria grabs the cutting board and blasts GreenPete in the back of his head. His eyes roll up and he falls to the floor. Koteen takes the pot of boiling hot water and dumps it on Brock Cole Lee. Doria then nails him with the solid wooden cutting board and takes him out.

———————————
COMMERCIAL BREAK
———————————

Every Thursday Night from our friends at High Octane Wrestling

The Best Arena, Chicago IL
November 26, 2009 12:00 AM

Mario Maurako v Mr. Cool
The referee for this match is Rick “Even” Stevens, and the rules are HOFC Bout.

Trent v Jay Davis
The referee for this match is Jatt Starr, and the rules are Standard Match.

Justin Decent v Chris CK
The referee for this match is Jatt Starr, and the rules are Standard Match.

Bobbinette “Queen B” Carey v Joseph Gregory
The referee for this match is Rick “Even” Stevens, and the rules are HOFC Bout.

Max Kael© v Twisted Reality© v Shane Reynolds v Brothers of the Beast
The referee for this match is Matt Boettcher, and the rules are Standard Match.

Missouri Valley Wrestling Association

MVWA 15 from Terre Haute, Indiana

Sabrina James and Alicia Rowe
vs.
Vatican Vice Squad

Weathergirl Hallie
vs.
Corrina Romanov

MVW TELEVISION TITLE MATCH
Champion Carrieanne McDermott
vs.
‘Lingerie Girl’ Brandi Bayless

NON-TITLE MATCH
Miss USA
vs.
American Pi

——————————-
——————————-

N-Bomb and General R.C. Patton already in the ring ready for their match.

*Bobby Bare’s Tequila Sheila begins to play*

Suave: “And here comes the American Trucker being led to the ring by Tequila Sheila.”

Pour me another Tequila Sheila,
Take off that red satin dress
I cross the border and I beat the dealer
For all the damn gold in Juarez.

I feel like old Pancho Villa, Sheila
And sure could use a friend (I got Pesso to spend)
So pour me another Tequilla Sheila
And lay down n’love me again.

Though I can tell you about it
But don’t mind my gun by the bed
I feel kind of naked without it
And it eases the fear in my head.

Just pass me the salt n’the lemon
Bend down n’blow out the light
I never had trusted the woman
But Sheila I’ll trust you tonight.

Chorus:
Pour me another Tequila Sheila
Take off that red satin dress
I cross the border and I beat the dealer
Dor all the damn gold in Juarez.

I feel like old Pancho Villa, Sheila
And sure could use a friend (I got Pesso to spend)
So pour me another Tequilla Sheila,
And lay down n’love me again..

Charlene Ann: “…weighing in at 225 pounds, from Gary, Indiana, a member of American Heartland Coalition, accompanied by Tequila Sheila, American Trucker!!!”

MATCH #3
Newt Tron Bomb w/General R.C. Patton (American Patriots)
vs.
American Trucker w/Tequila Sheila (American Heartland Coalition)
N-Bomb is hesitant before getting in the ring and locking up with American Trucker. Slow to start. They lockup again and American Trucker sends N-Bomb over the top rope. N-Bomb again avoids American Trucker, guess that. Back in the ring and N-Bomb hits an uppercut and goes to the top rope, American Trucker goes for the Jake Brake which N-Bomb is able to escape. American Trucker lays in the sick back elbow sequence. American Trucker in control. He actually takes time out to go give high fives to the fans. That might just come back to haunt him. N-Bomb knocks American Trucker out of the ring and goes for a dive but American Trucker catches him and slams him spine-first into the corner. They make their way back into the ring where American Trucker hits a double fist off the top rope followed by a missed Carbon Footprint. N-Bomb goes to work on American Trucker’s leg, Indian Deathlock chained into a Figure Four. American Trucker tries to reverse and eventually is able to but N-Bomb gets to the ropes. American Trucker clotheslines N-Bomb on his knees and then nails N-Bomb twice. He then hits a side slam for a near fall. N-Bomb tries to go up top but is caught, leading to American Trucker hitting a fall away slam. He goes for a chokeslam but N-Bomb gets out of it, American Trucker eventually hits it for a two count. Jake Brake gets countered by N-Bomb, GERMAN! Twice! THRICE!! N-Bomb covers 1…2…no! American Trucker rushes at N-Bomb but gets hit with a Scoop Slam! 1…2…NO! N-Bomb going for ‘Silent But Deadly’…American Trucker gets out of it and goes for a power bomb which N-Bomb counters into another Ankle Lock. American Trucker again gets out. N-Bomb rushes at American Trucker but ends up hitting the steel post, leaving American Trucker open to hit the Jake Brake! Cover. 1…2…2.9007!!!! American Trucker goes for a Tombstone but N-Bomb gets out of it and again locks in an Ankle Lock. American Trucker eventually gets out of it and hits a huge clothesline for two. American Trucker goes up to the top rope but General R.C. Patton smacks him with his horse whip and AT falls off. N-Bomb gets up and hits a belly to belly Suplex. N-Bomb then hits a Frog Splash!! 1…2…NO!! N-Bomb heads back to the top, American Trucker is up, victory roll by N-Bomb! 1…2…3!

WINNER: NEWT TRON BOMB in 6:49

BACKSTAGE
PCW Champion ‘Hollywood A-Lister’ Stone Chism is backstage with the Skanky Rich Bimbos (Paris Hilton and Lindsay Lohan) and not in a good mood. He wants to know how the PCW TV Champion SNAFU can be ranked ahead of him in the WWR Men’s rankings? Chism: “It’s simply inconceivable that someone holding a lesser crown can be ranked ahead of me.” Paris Hilton: “That’s right, honey. We’re hot. He’s not.” Chism: “It’s time to knock Mr. SNAFU down a peg.” Chism heads for the door. Paris: “Where are you going?” Chism: “To have a chat with Nancy Pelosi. She’ll fix this for me.”

MATCH #4 New Moon Hottie Challenge Match
Amariie Scouse (Team Jacob)
vs.
Megann Mironey (Team Edward)
The two lock up, Amariie takes Megann down early and gets a pinfall. After the two count, she gives Megann an uppercut and a low kick. Amariie delivers some more punches and whips Megann towards the ropes. Megann responds with an elbow and tries to send Amariie out with her feet. It’s unsuccessful. Amariie responds by throwing a punch but Megann avoids it. Megann tries a low strike but Amariie hits a baseball slide that sends her out to the faces. Amariie leaves the ring to fetch Megann. After sending Megann back into the ring, Amariie gets back on offense. A couple of kicks to the head is followed up with another uppercut. Michelle Amariie twists the arm of Megann and tries to whip Megann to the corner. The challenger counters it and elbows Amariie. Megann lands some kicks and punches and gives Amariie a one-person flapjack. She pins Amariie but only gets a two count.

Suddenly, someone creepy comes out.

Yes…the Burger King…King. He comes out and tries to reason with both girls. And then…

The extreme equalizer- Whiskey Tango Foxtrot!

Down deep the circle
Round and round down below
Down by condition
Running in circles

WTF runs down. The crowd pumps their first at the chorus.

Now get it up!
Arriba, ‘riba
Oh, oh, oh
Get it up

WTF goes up to the Burger King. Kick. Wham. Choke slam. The match is called…and thank God.

WINNER: No Contest in 3:01

BACKSTAGE
PCW Champion Stone Chism is in Nancy Pelosi’s office to discuss why he is ranked below PCW Television Champion SNAFU in the latest WWR ratings. Pelosi agrees that it’s an affront to the PCW Title and promises to rectify the situation.

————————–

UPCOMING PCW EVENTS:
12/2- PCW House Show
12/5- PCW Extreme Political TV on P-SPAN
12/9- PCW House Show
12/12- PCW/MVW Night of Champions
12/20- WWR ‘Christmas in the Caribbean’ Supershow in Puerto De Macoris
12/26- PCW Year End in Review

—————————

MAIN EVENT:
The Goatbusters (Ray Scantz and Peter Jenkman)
vs.
The Extreme Weather Network (Steve Abrams and Mike Bettis w/Jim Frascantore)

*Spooky music begins followed by a funky beat*

The Goatbusters appear and begin to dance down the aisle. Movie Classic accompanies them.

If there’s something grazing
In your neighborhood
Who you gonna call
(Goatbusters)
If you see a herd
And it don’t look good
Who you gonna call
(Goatbusters)

I ain’t afraid of no Goat
I ain’t afraid of no Goat

If you’re seeing horns
Running through your yard
Who can you call
(Goatbusters)
If you have a goat
Sleeping in your bed
Oh, who you gonna call
(Goatbusters)

I ain’t afraid of no Goat
I ain’t afraid of no Goat

Who you gonna call
(Goatbusters)
If you’re all alone
Pick up the phone
And call
(Goatbusters)

I ain’t afraid of no Goat
I hear it likes the girls
I ain’t afraid of no Goat
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah

Who you gonna call
(Goatbusters)
If you’ve had a dose
Of a freaky Goat
Maybe you’d better call
(Goatbusters)

Let me tell you something
Bustin’ makes me feel good

I ain’t afraid of no Goat
I ain’t afraid of no Goat

Don’t get caught alone, oh no
(Goatbusters)
When it comes through your door
Unless you just want some more
I think you better call
(Goatbusters)
Ow

Who you gonna call
(Goatbusters)
Who you gonna call
(Goatbusters)
Ah, I think you better call
(Goatbusters)…

The Goatbusters, Peter Jenkman and Ray Scantz climb into the ring. Suave: “The winner gets NCISF’d on Wednesday night’s PCW/MVW House Show…Show.”

Abrams and Jenkman start things out with a shoving contest and Jenkman grabs a headlock and then bulls over him with a shoulder block. We get a leapfrog sequence and Abrams hits a gut punch, leaps over Jenkman and hits a spinning wheel kick. Scantz tags in, jumps into the ring and taunts, but Abrams is having none of it and hits a kick to the gut. They do a leapfrog sequence to a stalemate until Scantz schools Abrams with a series of armdrags. Bettis tags in, fakes a Greco-Roman Knucklelock and hits a boot to the gut, and follows with a stiff chop and a back elbow. Jenkman tags back in and they trade shoves, shoulder blocks and slaps. Kevin blows snot on Bettis and Bettis spits on Kevin. Jenkman wins a forearm exchange but Bettis hits a dropkick. He wins another strike war and whips Kevin to the corner and hits a corner clothesline, and then hits a snap mare before hitting a running boot for a two count. Abrams tags in and controls Kevin with corner thrusts but Jenkman counters a vertical suplex with his own. Jenkman grabs a front facelock and Scantz tags in. Scantz and Abrams trade strikes and Bettis is back in and so is Jim Frascantore. They hit a double football tackle on Scantz. Bettis covers for two.

Bettis hits a snap suplex for two and Scantz backs up and tags Jenkman in. Kevin telegraphs a back body drop and gets kicked, but he rolls under a clothesline and DDTs Bettis for two. Abrams tried to break up the cover and gets a snot rocket in his direction. He tells Scantz to put the boot up and slams Bettis’s face on the boot. Scantz is in and he gets two off a scoop slam. Jenkmanerico work in the drop toehold/somersault legdrop combo, Scantz takes out Abrams and Jenkman covers for two. Scantz tags back in and stays on top of things with strikes. He whips Bettis into the corner but runs into a back elbow, and Bettis hits the reverse STO into the middle turnbuckle. Bettis makes the tag and Abrams busts out some Redneck Fu and an Alabama Slam. Jenkman comes in and Abrams hits the leg lariat to the back of the neck. He runs into a boot and Scantz tosses him to the apron. Scantz dives onto Bettis and Abrams dives onto Jenkman!

Scantz and Abrams go back into the ring and stare each other down. Abrams wins a forearm battle but runs into Scantz’s modified Michinoku Driver. Scantz gets two and goes for the corner Yakuza Kick, but runs into a superkick. Both men make tags and Bettis and Jenkman trade forearms and elbows. LOTS of forearms and elbows. Bettis wins with punches and stomps a mudhole. He does the facewash but Scantz hits the Yakuza Kick when he goes to the other corner! SIDE EXPLODER BY ABRAMS! POWERBOMB BY JENKMAN! All four men are down! Jenkman and Bettis are up and trade punches, but Jenkman hits the Codebreaker! He heads up top, but the Swanton Bomb eats knees! Jenkman tags out but Scantz runs into a forearm. Scantz tosses Bettis to the apron but Abrams hits a clothesline and a cutter, Bettis lifts up Jenkman, DEATH VALLEY DRIVER ON THE APRON!

Jim Frascantore pick up Scantz and hit the crucifix bomb/neckbreaker combination. Bettis covers but Scantz kicks out at two! They set up for the Emergency Broadcast Suplex, but Jenkman grabs Abrams, VICTORY ROLL BY SCANTZ! ONE…TWO…THR-NO! Scantz grabs Bettis, and hits an Exploder into the buckles! Jenkman is in, CANNONBALL! Scantz is up top, SOMERSAULT COAST TO COAST DROPKICK BY SCANTZ! Cover…1…2…3!

WINNER: The Goatbusters in 15:27

———————————-

Tonight on PCW Extreme Political TV

Posted on November 21, 2009 by Political Championship Wrestling

It’s the final show before Thanksgiving and what PCW pre-holiday episode would be complete without an appearance by the Green World Order.

The American Patriots will send up a PCW original tag team in ‘The Raving Rednecks’ Locke and Loade to face off against the Bipartisan Dream Team Blue Dog D and RINO.

American Trucker (American Heartland Coalition), coming off a big win last week, faces Newt Tron Bomb (American Patriots) this week.

Another rebroadcast of Bill Clinton’s Hot Tub with special guest Sarah Palin because who can get enough of Bill Clinton and Sarah Palin in a hot tub?

And finally, the Main Event will feature the Goatbusters taking on the weather daredevils The Extreme Weather Network.

All this and more tonight on PCW Extreme Political TV.

Filed under: Average Joe, Blogs- Pro Wrestling, Independents, Joe the Plumber, Paul Heyman, Politics, Pro Wrestling, Small Town America, democrats, joe six pack, political satire, political wrestling, red state, republicans | Tagged: Bill Clinton, Sarah Palin | 1 Comment »

PCW/MVW House Show…Show

Posted on November 19, 2009 by Political Championship Wrestling

MVW MATCH #1 from MVW House Show in Tulsa, OK
‘Sweet Southern Comfort’ Jackie Daniels vs. Katie Collins
Collins sidesteps a Daniels charge which sends her to the floor, but she’s right back inside and they go face to face with Daniels getting a headbutt. Collins comes back with a pair of chops, and then a rollup for two. Daniels bails to the outside again, and then comes back in to get rolled up for two. Daniels hits the ropes, and stops short on a Collins leapfrog attempt to deliver a clothesline. Daniels stomps Collins, and then chokes her out on the bottom rope. Daniels connects with a pair of back elbows, but misses a charge running face first into the top buckle. Collins comes fighting back, and heads to the top rope. Daniels catches her and knocks her all the way to the floor as we head to break. Back from commercial with Daniels in control using a reverse chinlock on Collins. Daniels goes for a back suplex, but Collins reverses coming down on top of Daniels for two. Daniels is right back with a clothesline, and mounts Collins with a series of punches. Daniels drops a leg on Collins for a two count, but as she comes off the ropes Collins hits Trouble in Paradise out of nowhere. Daniels rolls to the floor off of it, and Collins has to drag her back inside. That delay allows Daniels to kick out at two. Daniels grabs a small package for a two count, but Collins is right back with a clothesline. Collins hits the boom drop, but Daniels is able to reach the ropes again at two. Daniels rolls to the floor, and then is able to drop Collins’s throat across the second rope. Collins hits a backslide for a two count once they end up back inside, and they then trade right hands inside. Collins delivers a flying forearm, and a spinning heel kick. Collins goes for a crossbody off the top, but Daniels rolls through for two. Collins is back hitting the SOS for a two count, and then misses an attempt to hop on the top rope causing her to crash to the mat. That allows Daniels to hit the Daniels Splash, and that gives her the win at 10:42.

WINNER: Jackie Daniels at 10:42

MATCH #2 from PCW House Show in Richmond, IN
Ray Scantz of the Goatbusters vs. PCW’s Latest Rookie Sensation Bird ‘The Mark’ Ridfych

*Spooky music begins followed by a funky beat*

If there’s something grazing
In your neighborhood
Who you gonna call
(Goatbusters)
If you see a herd
And it don’t look good
Who you gonna call
(Goatbusters)

I ain’t afraid of no Goat
I ain’t afraid of no Goat

If you’re seeing horns
Running through your yard
Who can you call
(Goatbusters)
If you have a goat
Sleeping in your bed
Oh, who you gonna call
(Goatbusters)

I ain’t afraid of no Goat
I ain’t afraid of no Goat

Who you gonna call
(Goatbusters)
If you’re all alone
Pick up the phone
And call
(Goatbusters)

I ain’t afraid of no Goat
I hear it likes the girls
I ain’t afraid of no Goat
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah

Who you gonna call
(Goatbusters)
If you’ve had a dose
Of a freaky Goat
Maybe you’d better call
(Goatbusters)

Let me tell you something
Bustin’ makes me feel good

I ain’t afraid of no Goat
I ain’t afraid of no Goat

Don’t get caught alone, oh no
(Goatbusters)
When it comes through your door
Unless you just want some more
I think you better call
(Goatbusters)
Ow

Who you gonna call
(Goatbusters)
Who you gonna call
(Goatbusters)
Ah, I think you better call
(Goatbusters)…

Goatbuster Ray Scantz climbs into the ring to face PCW’s Latest Rookie Sensation.

The bell rings and they lockup, with Ridfych getting a go behind. Scantz makes it to the ropes and they lock up again. Ridfych with an arm wrench, but Scantz reverses and kicks the leg out of Ridfych. Ridfych up and he reverses into a clothesline. Ridfych with a hammerlock, but Scantz slips out and runs off the ropes, holding on to avoid a dropkick. Scantz hits a knee to the gut, but runs into an elbow in the corner, Ridfych goes to the second rope and hits a spinning back elbow for two. Ridfych goes for the springboard sunset flip, but Scantz rolls through and stomps away on Ridfych. Ridfych gets his neck snapped on the bottom rope and that looked painful. Scantz dumps Ridfych to the floor as go to commercial at 2:40.

Dream Wrestling Federation

DARK MATCHES
Remy Leroux vs. Jay Price
Charlie Blackwell vs. Max Douglas
Zero vs. Daymare

SLAUGHTER TELEVISION TAPING
Casey Pierro-Zabatol vs. Force
Bishop Steele vs. Upton Osgood
Cancer Jiles vs. Billy Wilson w/Bob Wilson
Adrien Cochrane vs. Travis Williams

Doozer vs. Marshall
DWF World Championship

Lupin Cy vs. 501
DREAM Championship Match

Dunkin’ Donuts Center – Providence, RI
November 23, 2009 12:00 AM

“Perfect” Paul Paras v Aceldama©
The referee for this match is Mystery Ref, and the rules are Street Fight Match.

Holmes v Erites Kallisten
The referee for this match is Romeo Ward, and the rules are Standard Match.

Golden Phoenix v Black Mamba
The referee for this match is Frank Tsonga, and the rules are Standard Match.

Doozer v Jason Midnight
The referee for this match is Romeo Ward, and the rules are Standard Match.

Graystone v Tim Shipley
The referee for this match is Frank Tsonga, and the rules are Standard Match.

Back at 6:50 and Ridfych escapes a submission hold and both men trade blows. Scantz gets a cheap shot in and hits the leg lariat from behind for a two count. Scantz chokes Ridfych on the middle rope and hits a back elbow for another two count. Scantz connects with a neckbreaker and gets another near fall. Scantz goes to the grounded chinlock and Ridfych again to his feet. He punches out… Crowd: “FASTBALL…FASTBALL…FASTBALL…” and slips out of a back suplex, hitting a version on an inverted DDT for a two count. Scantz boots Ridfych in the chest, but runs into the spinning heel kick. Ridfych hits a series of clotheslines and Scantz go to the ropes, so Ridfych stands on his back. Ridfych hits a body press off the top rope for a two count. Scantz gets a quick shot on Ridfych and throws him to the corner. Ridfych avoids the charge and flip kicks Scantz in the head. Ridfych connects with the Tornado DDT for a near fall. Scantz slips out of the Killswitch and Scantz hits a Tiger Bomb!!! Scantz only gets two and can’t believe it. Ridfych gets to the apron and Scantz tries a suplex, but Ridfych back body drops him to the floor. Ridfych dives to the floor on top of Scantz. Ridfych again with the punches. Crowd: “FASTBALL…FASTBALL…FASTBALL…SLIDER!” Scantz down. Ridfych covers and gets the pin.

WINNER: BIRD ‘THE MARK’ RIDFYCH at 9:33

MATCH #3 from MVW’s House Show in Joplin, MO
‘Demolition Machine in a Short Skirt’ Dawn McGill vs. ‘Texas Cowgirl’ Haley Dallas
The bell rings and Dallas’s boot wasn’t tied enough. Dallas gets attacked by McGill as she finishes and McGill clubs away with forearms. McGill gets an arm wrench and takes down Dallas by the arm. Dallas gets to the ropes and against needs to fix her boots. They lockup and Dallas blocks a suplex before getting the headlock. McGill whips her and both women go down from a shoulder block. Dallas gets a European uppercut and has her Russian legsweep blocked, sort of. McGill sends Dallas to the floor and hits a diving dropkick to the floor as we go to commercial at 3:30.

Every Thursday Night from our friends at High Octane Wrestling

The Best Arena, Chicago IL
November 19, 2009 12:00 AM

Bobbinette “Queen B” Carey v Chris Kostoff
The referee for this match is Rick “Even” Stevens, and the rules are HOFC Bout.

Justin Decent v Rush Marconi
The referee for this match is Joel Hortega, and the rules are Standard Match.

David Black© v Dawn McGill
The referee for this match is Matt Boettcher, and the rules are Standard Match.

“The Headhunter” Michael DeNucci© v DavoteK
The referee for this match is Rick “Even” Stevens, and the rules are HOFC Bout.

Jatt Starr v Ethan Cavanaugh
The referee for this match is Matt Boettcher, and the rules are Standard Match.

Max Kael© v Chris CK
The referee for this match is Joel Hortega, and the rules are Standard Match.

And while you’re there (cheap plug…cheap plug…) check out this book as well. Loose Cannons

There are some books you curl up with on a warm couch to read.

This isn’t one of them.

However, DeWayne Cantrell isn’t like most people.

And will American politics ever be the same?

———–

And just as an FYI, several current PCW characters are in Loose Cannons.

Back at 6:30 as McGill hits the rolling snapmare and kick to the chest. Dallas catches McGill off a body lock and she dumps McGill to the floor. McGill slammed onto the announcer’s table and rolled in. Dallas applies a grounded headlock. McGill fights out and slips after a kick, allowing Dallas to hit a forearm smash. Dallas goes back to the headlock and floats over into a front chancery, but McGill gets up. Dallas with a Butterfly Suplex for a two count. Dallas with a series of knees to the gut, but McGill catches a kick and hits a dragon screw. McGill hits a series of kicks and connects with the Roaring Elbow for a two count. McGill heads up top and misses with a flying spinning heel kick. Dallas measures for the knee trembler, but McGill connects with a roundhouse kick to the head out of nowhere! McGill then drags Dallas up to the top turnbuckle and hits her new finisher, Blunt Force Trauma. Dallas is out. McGill gets the cover and three count for the pin at 10:40.

WINNER: DAWN McGILL at 10:40

MATCH #4 from PCW’s House Show in West Lafayette, IN
A. Tom Bomb (American Patriots) vs. ‘American Citizen’ Kevin Scott (American Heartland Coalition)
They lock up and we get a clean break in the corner. Scott goes behind A-Bomb, who pulls a standing switch. Scott gets one of his own and takes A-Bomb down, so A-Bomb rolls to the ropes. A-Bomb tries a takedown but Scott stuffs it and gets a headlock takedown. A-Bomb pushes him off the headlock and hits the STELLAR dropkick. Scott goes to the floor to recover. Back to the action and Scott gets the boot to the gut followed by some Europeans, but drops his head and gets booted. Knee drop by A-Bomb gets a quick 2 count. Scott goes to the floor again. Back in and they lock up in the kunckle lock, controlled by Scott. A-Bomb starts to gain control but Scott gets a boot to the gut and tries to throw A-Bomb to the floor. A-Bomb hangs on and springboards over the ropes and connects with a HUGE clothesline. AGAIN Scott goes to the floor, A-Bomb goes for the aerial attack but catches himself on the apron as Scott moves. He tries to springboard in again but Scott clips the leg and A-Bomb flops over the rope then falls to the floor. Scott knocks him off the apron as he tries to come back in, then HITS A SOMERSAULT SENTON to the outside!!! Scott rolls A-Bomb back inside and gets a 2 count. Backbreaker by Scott gets 2. He locks in a rear chinlock with the knee posted to the back of A-Bomb. A-Bomb fights out of the hold but gets caught in a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker. Suplex by Scott gets 2. Scott now locks in a bear hug from behind as we hit the halfway mark. A-Bomb backs Scott to the corner to break the hold then connects with a solid right. Whip by A-Bomb is reversed but Scott charges into a boot. Another whip is reversed and Scott ctaches A-Bomb, locks him in and hits the overhead belly to belly. Body scissors applied now by Scott. A-Bomb has his arm inside the scissors so Scott switches it up to a chinlock. A-Bomb manages to break the hold and connects with an elbow, A-Bomb goes to the ropes but runs right into a rear choke. A-Bomb turns into it and connects with a back suplex. Clotheslines by A-Bomb, and the springboard flying forearm gets 2! Hily crap he got some height on that. Atomic Power Bomb is blocked and Scott catapults A-Bomb into the ring post then hits a release German for 2. American Slam is countered, PELE! 1…2…2.8697! A-Bomb goes up top but Scott is up and runs up to meet him…T-BONE SUPLEX FROM THE TOP! 1…2…2.8496! Scott tries the American Slam again, countered into an arm drag! ROARING LARIAT! By A-Bomb! 1…2…no! 3 minutes left. A-Bomb again goes for the Atomic Power Bomb, Scott backdrops him but A-Bomb hangs on for a sunset flip! Scott rolls through…Cattle Mutilation! A-Bomb counters to a small package! 1…2…no! GERMAN! He holds on and Scott hits another! And a third! 1…2…no! Down come the straps and A-Bomb rolls through again! ATOMIC POWER BOMB!!! 1…2…2.9633! I make that 20 minutes. A-Bomb is pissed, he goes up top now but jumps right into a big boot! AMERICAN SLAM! 1…2…2.9633!!! Now Scott is frustrated, here comes the moonsault…misses! What a shock. A-Bomb goes for the springboard 450…connects!!!! 1….2…2.9889!!! Yes West Lafayette, this is awesome. A-Bomb perches Scott on the top and tries a superplex, Scott fights it off but A-Bomb crotches him and takes him up for the Atomic Power Bomb! Scott kicks out of it and now he’s in position for an American Slam! A-Bomb counters again! Scott picks the ankle and rolls through to the Cattle Mutilation! A-Bomb taps.

WINNER: ‘American Citizen’ KEVIN SCOTT at 21:09

MATCH #5 from MVW’s House Show from Tulsa, OK
Caroline Kelly vs. Jill-Berg
THUMP

THUMP

THUMP-THUMP-THUMP

THUMP

THUMP-THUMP-THUMP

The video screen goes to just outside a dressing room in the back. A police escort is waiting at the door. One of the policemen knocks on the door.

Policeman: “Ms. Berg. It’s time.”

The door opens and four large male bodybuilding types walk out of the dressing room surrounding a petite woman and her male assistant in the middle. The woman is busy talking on her cell phone while the man furiously scribbles down notes as the group makes their way towards the ring.

THUMP

THUMP-THUMP-THUMP

The procession emerges from the back and starts their way down the ramp.

Her assistant has a microphone and a portable tape recorder. He flips it on.

“JILLLLL-BERG…JILLLLL-BERG…”

The group then continues towards the ring leaving the police escort behind.

“JILLLLL-BERG…JILLLLL-BERG…”

The bodyguards assist Ms. Berg into the ring. She, her assistant, and two bodyguards immediately go to a corner.

“JILLLLL-BERG…JILLLLL-BERG…”

Berg continues to talk on her cell phone.

“JILLLLL-BERG…JILLLLL-BERG…”

The crowd rises to their feet when two of the bodyguards race across the ring and attack Kelly. Double clothesline decks Kelly. Jill-Berg nods and hands her phone to Jerry, her assistant. Handspring into a spinning heel kick snaps Kelly’s head to the right. She’s out on her feet. SPEAR! Jill-Berg lifts Kelly up…JACKHAMMER! COVER! ONE…TWO…THREE!

WINNER: JILL BERG in :34

Filed under: Average Joe, Blogs- Pro Wrestling, Joe the Plumber, Pro Wrestling, Small Town America, joe six pack, political wrestling, red state | Tagged: ECW, Extreme Championship Wrestling, Ring of Honor, ROH, TNA, World Wrestling Entertainment, WWE | 2 Comments »

Bill Clinton’s Hot Tub w/Guest Sarah Palin

Posted on November 17, 2009 by Political Championship Wrestling

(Replay from 10/7-PCW EXTREME POLITICAL TV- PART 2)

BILL CLINTON’S HOT TUB
Slick Announcer Guy: “And now, it’s time for our new feature on PCW Extreme Political TV, Bill Clinton’s Hot Tub. And here’s your host, Bill Clinton.” Clinton, inside a steaming hot tub, waves to the audience. Clinton: “Good evening. Tonight on our new show, Bill Clinton’s Hot Tub, we are damn lucky to have one of the most polarizing figures in American politics today. And even better, she’s hot looking! Former Alaska Governor Sarah Palin!” The camera pans over to Palin who seems a little uncomfortable with the whole arrangement. Her clothes are stacked up by the side of the hot tub and she tries to keep as low as possible inside the hot tub. Clinton: “Governor Palin, I am profoundly appreciative that you came on my show tonight.” Palin: “Um…thank you, President Clinton. But, was it really necessary for both of us to take all of our clothes off?” Clinton: “Well, it all depends on what your definition of ‘clothes’ is. Is it a metaphoric reference to cover up what we really feel inside or is it more of an issue of not wanting to totally put yourself out there?” Palin: “Riiiight. You betcha. Can we get to my book?” Clinton reaches over and grabs a copy of Palin’s new book, Going Rogue. Clinton: “From her humble beginnings to her time in the spotlight as the first female Republican Vice Presidential candidate, Sarah Palin has led an extraordinary life. Going Rogue will recount her political experiences, her time as Mayor of Wasilla and as the first female governor of Alaska, as well as her rapid rise on the national stage during the 2008 campaign. Additionally, she’ll share insights into the personal challenges she’s faced including balancing her time as a working mother, recognizing the war’s impact with her son serving combat in Iraq, having a child with a disability and supporting her teenage daughter through an unplanned pregnancy.” Palin: “I just wanted to tell my side of the story and share the experiences that I’ve gone through over the past year of so.” Clinton: “Very intriguing. Going Rogue. I think I’d like your book better if you called it Going Commando. BWHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHHAHAHA” Palin: “Mr. President, that’s not the least bit funny.” Clinton: “BWHAHAHAHAHAHA…haha… hahaha….ha ha……ha…………..ha…oh, all right. You-a…you became a lightning rod for any number of groups. Some thought you were refreshing. Others didn’t think you were ready for prime time. You believe this book tells us all about the real Sarah Palin? Palin: “Yes I do. It’s about growing up in Alaska, meeting Todd, running for office, addresses my beliefs in faith and family, um, the book is about who I am.” Clinton: “All right, before we go, I have to ask you a favor.” Palin: “Um…what?” Clinton: “Can you do that whole put your hands in the air thing you did on Saturday Night Live?” Palin: “Not right at this moment.” Clinton: “Shucks. Okay, that’s it for Bill Clinton’s Hot Tub. Tune in next week when-” Hillary’s Voice: “WILLIAM JEFFERSON CLINTON!” Clinton: “Oh ****. Hillary doesn’t know I have company. Can you kind of go under the water for a few seconds and…” Palin: “I don’t think so.” Hillary enters, none too happy. Clinton: “Hi honey, how you do-” *CLANG* Hillary connects with a frying pan to the mush.

PCW Host Johnny Suave: “And we’re back. That was intellectually stimulating…okay…it was stimulating, but we won’t get into details…

—————————————–

The Alaska Pitbull’s new book is called ‘Going Rogue.’ Click here to go to Amazon’s web site to look.

And while you’re there (cheap plug…cheap plug…) check out this book as well. Loose Cannons

There are some books you curl up with on a warm couch to read.

This isn’t one of them.

However, DeWayne Cantrell isn’t like most people.

And will American politics ever be the same?

———–

And just as an FYI, several current PCW characters are in Loose Cannons.

W o rdPress.com Political Blogger Alliance

Filed under: Average Joe, Blogs- Pro Wrestling, Hillary Clinton, Independents, Joe the Plumber, John McCain, Politics, Small Town America, Third Party, democrats, fiction, joe six pack, political satire, red state, republicans, wordpress political blogs | Tagged: Bill Clinton, hot tub, Sarah Palin | Leave a Comment »

Dawn McGill on Fox News

Posted on November 17, 2009 by Political Championship Wrestling

(Interview between Fox’s Glenn Beck, the Daily Kos’s Markos Moutilsas, and Teresa Quanranta

“Ladies and Gentlemen, I’m a very very humble man. A simple clown really, but I want what’s best for my country because… because I love it so much, and every day they’re trying, bit by bit to take it away. Everyday, in ways both great and small. Sometimes it’s the federal government trying to make sure people don’t go bankrupt when they contract a life threatening illnes, and sometimes it’s a story like this. I promised you that I would be ever vigilant about all the threats to the American way of life, and I’m working to uphold that promise with a calm, reasoned discussion of…” FOX host Glenn Beck sniffled a bit. “… of the recent steroids scandal that’s all over the media. Joining me today is Teresa Quaranta, representing New Frontier Wrestling. Teresa, I have to say that I’m concerned about this. I… I don’t think our fathers… our brave founding fathers… would have ever imagined anything like what we saw from a man claiming to stand for Justice in this country.”

“Are you OK, man?”

“Teresa, you sounds like you’ve got bull testicles in the back of your neck! Shut up!”

“.”

“Also here is Markos Moulitsas-Zuniga, foreign liberal blogging communist, basically the scum of the earth and the sworn enemy of God, freedom, and western civilization as a whole. Say hello, Mr. Moulitsas-Zuniga.”

“Always happy to be here, Glenn.”

“Teresa: justify this.”

“Uhm… they were chewable Flinstones Vitamins? I don’t think there’s anything crazy in ‘em, except for the purple ones, one time I was at a party and ate nothing but the purple ones and when I woke up I was in St. Paul Minnesota hanging upside down from a flagpole wearing nothing but a -”

“YOU’RE A BARBARIAN,” Markos couldn’t take anymore, apparently.

“Because I… psychologically slash physically damage people for money?”

“Well, there is that, but mostly it’s because you help sell Big Dairy’s slime to the uninformed masses. Aren’t you ashamed to induce people to slurp down caffineated crap down their gullets? Cows were tortured for that milk. Are you so weak, that you just can’t live without the fruits of the suffering of others? Meat, cheese, eggs, milk, dairy, fish, poultry, and let’s not get started on the use of animal byproducts! Bone jewelry? Leather bags. I hate the way you live! Look at me, Teresa. Take a look. I’m living proof that you can be strong, healthy, and a winner, through an animal-free diet. I’m the only decent human being in this studio, because I’m the only true vegan here tonight!”

Beck and Quaranta both sat there in silence for a moment, and finally Beck scratched his head.

“Look, this is another example of government interference destroying the free market. If we knocked down those regulations and gave Captain Justice some TAX CUTZ for those roids, he would have bought more of them. He would have gotten bigger and stronger. He would have sold more tickets to NFW shows all across the country and he would have stopped more crime! There’s nothing I love than bodyslamming poor people who try and forcibly take things from people who have money. Captain Justice is like a superpowered guardian of the economic status quo, so why do you, a noted Canadian -”

“Uh, Glenn I don’t think my home country is -”

“NOTED CANADIAN, why do you hate the free market? It says FREE right there in the title.”

“I just think that if he was using steroids, it would reduce his longevity and make him a less happy person. That would probably make justice less just for everyone.”

“Well, I think justice should be strong, should be angry, and should beat the hell out of foreigners, minorities, homosexuals, and women, and you’re all four in one overgrown package, in fact, so’s Zuniga.”

“.”

“The idea that he should have to call a press conference and apologize to the public, when his only crime is working to be the very best, fills me with a deep sense of sorrow. Cap, if you’re watching this, don’t bow down to the media elite! You represent America, and America NEVER apologizes! Now get out there, stomp the stuffing out of Varga and this lesbian -”

“!!”

“- and grab your spot atop the tag team mountain, looking down from your mighty perch downwards at both of the teams you beat along the way!”

“Captain Justice is a witless tool of the capitalist system, and Teresa Quaranta isn’t much better. You’re all the worst. I’m gonna blog about you two SO HARD when we’re off air.”

“Every day that passes that doesn’t see CAPTAIN JUSTICE as winner of the Bunkhouse Stampede, is like a little flame licking at the feet of liberty. And everytime Teresa Quaranta gives an exhaustive explanation for why the person she’s fighting is mentally retarded, it’s like pouring gasoline on that flame.”

Beck took a keg of gas. “IS THAT WHAT YOU PEOPLE WANT? LIBERTY TO DIE IN A HOT GAS FIRE? Because China WILL collect the insurance money!”

“Glenn, please don’t-”
“GET OFF MY PHOOOOONE -” “Burn, facist, burn!”

There’s a huge commotion off set.

*TWHACK*

“AAAAAARGHHHH!”

*THWACK*

“AAAAAARGHHHH!”

“WATCH OUT! IT’S A ROIDED UP WRESTLER GOING BERSERK!”

Markos: “Oh my God. Captain Justice is here.”

A security guard falls backwards through the door and lands on teh floor. Markos runs back and forth on the set like a headless chicken. But…it’s not Captain Justice who comes through the door. It’s the ‘Six Foot Demolition Machine in a Short Skirt’ Dawn McGill. Another security guard tries to get in her way. She swings her leg back and brings it up with great force, her 4″ stilettos connecting squarely on the guard’s scrotum. In an instant, his face turns pale white. The guard tips over and lies on the floor gasping for breath.

Guard: “Mommy.”

Markos: “You’re not Captain Justice! You’re…you’re…”

Beck: “I know who this is. She’s from that…that…political wrestling federation.”

Markos: “PCW? Political Championship Wrestling?”

Beck: “Yeah. They make fun of people like you and me, Markos. They make fun of ideological warriors standing up for what they believe……and making tons of money along the way.”

Markos: “Why that’s…Unamerican!”

Beck: “Indeed. (to McGill) Why don’t you go back to your roided up geeky friends at PCW and *choke* hey…urk…uh…”

McGill smiles and walks Beck over to the news set. Markos runs in behind her and jumps on her back. He starts pounding on the back of her neck.

Markos: “Let him go! Let him go!”

Dawn makes a slight movement back and then jerks forward. Markos loses his grip and starts to slide down. Dawn bends her left leg at the knee and catches Markos in the groin with her 4″ stiletto. He immediately covers himself and his jaw is gaping wide open as the pain shot through his body.

McGill lifts Beck up and power bombs him through the news desk. The set literally explodes upon impact with Beck in the middle of the wreckage.

McGill turns to Markos who’s now lying on the floor writhing in excruciating discomfort. Then she looks right into the camera.

Dawn: “Oh…and for the record…these…(she points to her muscles)…are real. And for that matter, so are these…(she points to her breasts). Just thought I’d point that out. Fox News will be back in a few…”

Filed under: Average Joe, Blogs- Pro Wrestling, Independents, Joe the Plumber, Politics, Small Town America, Third Party, democrats, joe six pack, political satire, red state, republicans, wordpress political blogs | Tagged: Daily Kos, Fox News, Glenn Beck, Markos Moutilsas, steroids | Leave a Comment »

Tomorrow Night on Best of House Show…Show

Posted on November 17, 2009 by Political Championship Wrestling

MVW Match
‘Sweet Southern Comfort’ Jackie Daniels
vs.
3 Time Former PCW Women’s Champion Katie Collins

PCW Match
Ray Scantz of the Goatbusters
vs.
PCW’s Latest Rookie Sensation Bird ‘The Mark’ Ridfych

MVW Match
‘Demolition Machine in a Short Skirt’ Dawn McGill
vs.
‘Texas Cowgirl’ Haley Dallas

PCW Match
A. Tom Bomb (American Patriots)
vs.
‘American Citizen’ Kevin Scott (American Heartland Coalition)

MAIN EVENT: MVW Match
Caroline Kelly
vs.
Jill-Berg

Filed under: Average Joe, Blogs- Pro Wrestling, Joe the Plumber, Pro Wrestling, Small Town America, joe six pack | Tagged: CNN, ECW, Extreme Championship Wrestling, MSNBC, Ring of Honor, ROH, TNA, World Wrestling Entertainment, WWE | Leave a Comment »

11/14-PCW Extreme Political TV on P-SPAN: Book Burnings, Bionic Arms, and Women College Soccer Players Going Rogue

Posted on November 15, 2009 by Political Championship Wrestling

PCW Extreme Political TV
Agora Theater
Cleveland, OH
Saturday November 14th
Host: Johnny Suave

Suave reviews the PCW Rankings…

PCW WORLD CHAMPION: ‘Hollywood A-Lister’ Stone Chism (Progressive Alliance)
PCW TELEVISION CHAMPION: SNAFU (Independent)
CONTENDERS:
#1- Starz N. Stripes (Progressive Alliance)
#2- Khalid-El (Axis of Evil)
#3- Bird ‘The Mark’ Ridfych (Independent)
#4- ‘The King of Old School Gimmicks’ Baron Von Munchke (Old School Kings)
#5- Newt Tron Bomb (American Patriots)
#6- American Trucker (American Heartland Coalition)

Tonight on PCW Extreme Political TV:

Blue Dog D and RINO vs. Newcomer Shaun Phillips and T-Bag (American Patriots)

Raving Rednecks Locke and Loade (American Patriots) vs. Island of Misfit Wrestlers

PCW Champion Stone Chism (Progressive Alliance) vs. Jobber the Hut (Island of Misfit Wrestlers)

American Trucker (American Heartland Coalition) vs. Baron Von Munchke w/Dr. Bill (Old School Kings)

Suave: “Here comes PCW’s latest signee, Shaun Phillips. Phillips as you might know was one half of the DWF Tag Team Champions USXF with Amy Mason who just signed with Missouri Valley Wrestling. American Patriots Leader Eric Cantor hopes Phillips can help spearhead their resurgance. We’ll find out starting tonight as Phillips and T-Bag take on the Bipartisan Dream Team Blue Dog D and RINO.”

MATCH #1
Shaun Phillips and T-Bag (American Patriots)
vs.
Blue Dog D (Progressive Alliance) and RINO (American Patriots)

…Suave: “Phillips makes the tag to T-Bag. T-Bag in…and OW! RINO greets him with a chop. T-Bag takes a step back. Mule kick. RINO didn’t see that coming! OH! T-Bag just kicked RINO in the groin! RINO bent over in obvious pain. He makes it to his corner and brings in Blue Dog D. Blue Dog D in. He runs the ropes…slingshot bodyblock! T-Bag slow to get up. Blue Dog D goes top rope. INCOMING! SHOOTING STAR PRESS! Blue Dog D for the win…1 …2…NO! T-Bag kicks out. Unbelievable! T-Bag slowly gets up. Blue Dog D with a waistlock…now a waistlock suplex! Blue Dog D covers…1…2…AGAIN! T-BAG JUST KICKED OUT! Blue Dog D is pissed. He thought he had him…he throws T-Bag through the ropes to the floor. RINO! RINO’S CHOKING T-BAG WITH A MICROPHONE CABLE! Here comes Blue Dog D…FALLING SPLASH! GOOD THING RINO GOT OUT OF THE WAY IN TIME. SHAUN PHILLIPS OVER! BLUE DOG D GETS BACK INTO THE RING! GORE! GORE! PHILLIPS FORGOT ABOUT RINO AND HE JUST BLASTED HIM WITH A GORE!” RINO takes T-Bag and heaves him back into the ring. Suave: “Phillips still down after taking a Gore from RINO. Blue Dog D with a running lariat and that bounces T-Bag hard off the mat. Blue Dog D walks around him…he’s measuring him…” Blue Dog D pulls T-Bag up and tucks his head under his armpit. He hoists him up, and then falls back onto the floor. Suave: “FILIBUSTER BUSTER! FILIBUSTER BUSTER! COVER! DAVEY KEELS COUNTS…1 …2 …3!“

WINNERS: BLUE DOG D and RINO in 9:43

Suave: “BLUE DOG D AND RINO MAKE THEIR RETURN TO PCW AND THE BIPARTISAN DREAM TEAM ARE VICTORIOUS! BACK WITH MORE PCW AFTER THIS…”

________________________________
_______COMMERCIAL BREAK_____

Missouri Valley Wrestling Association

MVWA 14 from Carbondale, Illinois

Replay of Miss USA-Jill Berg Match from DWF Golden Dreams

MVW Champion Miss USA speaks

‘Extreme Pizza Delivery Chick’ Tessa Mason and Caroline Kelly
vs.
Sabrina James and Alicia Rowe
vs.
Katie Collins and ‘Texas Cowgirl’ Haley Dallas

The Star Trekkies
vs.
Vatican Vice Squad
vs.
VIP Brin and Sky

Corrina Romanov
vs.
American Pi

‘Trailer Park Skater Girl’ Tanya Hardy
w/The White Trash Posse and Trailer Park Barbi
vs.
Weathergirl Hallie

After a replay of last week’s MVW/DWF Women’s unification match, Miss USA has some observations to make. The overriding question is will the 49-1 Jill Berg come to Missouri Valley Wrestling to continue her pursuit of excellence?

Two three team tag team matches highlight the card. The first match sees former DWF newcomers Amy aka…’Extreme Pizza Delivery Chick Tessa’ Mason and Caroline Kelly taking on former PCW wrestlers Sabrina James (formerly Mercedes in PCW) and Alicia Rowe (former Porsche Lexus) and former 3 time PCW Women’s Champion Katie Collins and the “Texas Cowgirl” Haley Dallas.

Match two sees The Star Trekkies meeting up against the always tough Vatican Vice Squad and VIP Brin and Sky.

Corrina Romanov begins another quest for gold as she meets up with the uber intelligent American Pi and Weathergirl Hallie also starts the long climb up with a match against ‘Trailer Park Skater Girl’ Tanya Hardy.

All this and more Sunday night on MVWA 14.

_________________________

Every Monday Night from our friends at High Octane Wrestling

Agganis Arena, Boston, MA
November 16, 2009

Johnny Otaku v Black Mamba
The referee for this match is Romeo Ward, and the rules are Standard Match.

Doozer v Scottywood
The referee for this match is Frank Tsonga, and the rules are Standard Match.

Mario Maurako v Jason Midnight
The referee for this match is Romeo Ward, and the rules are Standard Match.

Shane Reynolds and Erites Kallisten v Graystone and Kirsta Lewis
The referee for this match is Frank Tsonga, and the rules are Tag Team.

“Perfect” Paul Paras v Aceldama©
The referee for this match is Romeo Ward, and the rules are Submission Match.
______________________________
______________________________

Suave: “Friday night, a shocking and disturbing incident took place at a Sarah Palin book signing…”

SARAH PALIN BOOK SIGNING
Suave (voiceover): Palin was signing books when this happened.” Three masked men barged their way to the front of the line. The first man removed his mask. Suave (voiceover): “THAT’S RIGHT! IT’S LEVI JOHNSTON…” Johnston takes one of the books and clubs Palin in the side of the head with it. Then the other two take their masks off. Suave: “…AND MSNBC’S KEITH OLBERMANN AND HIS PALIN-HATING SIDEKICK SHANNYN MOORE! (if you don’t know who Shannyn Moore is- click here)” Olbermann and Moore pile a stack of Palin’s book ‘Going Rogue’ on the table. Johnston pushes a dazed Palin to the floor. Then he reaches into his pocket and lights a match. A huge fireball appears and torches the books. Suave: “THAT’S RIGHT! LEVI JOHNSTON, WHO’S CASHING IN ON THE ‘HATE-PALIN’ SENTIMENTS AMONG THE LEFT, USED A FIREBALL AND SET HER BOOKS ON FIRE! OLBERMANN, WHO FLATLY REFUSES TO APPEAR IN A PCW ARENA BEFORE EVERYTIME HE DOES, HE GETS CHOKE-SLAMMED BY THE EXTREME EQUALIZER WHISKEY TANGO FOXTROT, KICKS AWAY AT PALIN WHILE MOORE, WHO SEEMS TO HAVE AS MUCH OF A GRADE SCHOOL CRUSH ON PALIN AS OLBERMANN DOES, JOINS IN!”

*The opening riffs to Def Leppard’s ‘Rock, Rock Til You Drop play*

Suave: “THAT’S RIGHT! IT’S THE EXTREME EQUALIZER- WHISKEY TANGO FOXTROT!” A lane opens up among the people in line and WTF races to the table. Olbermann’s eyes light up when he sees WTF coming and he quickly scurries out the back. Moore also makes a quick exit leaving Levi Johnston to face the Extreme Equalizer. WTF grabs him by the throat…lifts…and WHAM! Right through the burning table. Crowd in line: “PCW!…PCW!…PCW!…”

Suave: “Somehow, I don’t think we’ve heard the last of the Johnston-Palin feud.”

MATCH #2
“The Raving Rednecks” Locke and Loade (American Patriots)
vs.
Mr. Jaundice and Captain Nausea w/Movie Classic (Island of Misfit Wrestlers)
Gary Locke and Earl Loade hit the ring as Toby Keith’s “Who’s Your Daddy” plays. Suave: “THE RAVING REDNECKS ARE BACK IN PCW TO TAKE ANOTHER CRACK AT WINNING THE PCW TAG TEAM TITLES!”

…Suave: “…ELBOW DROP BY MR. JAUNDICE FROM THE TOP TURNBUCKLE! WE COULD BE ON THE VERGE OF SEEING AN UPSET?” Mr. Jaundice goes up again. Locke nails a ropeflip hiptoss. Suave: “LOCKE GOT HIM WITH THE HIP TOSS. MR. JAUNDICE SCRAMBLES TO THE CORNER AND TAGS IN CAPTAIN NAUSEA. Captain Nausea in…he whips Locke to the corner. Mr. Jaundice gets a cheap shot from behind. Captain Nausea sets up…elbowdrop. Mr. Jaundice runs back in…he drops the leg Locke. Gary Loade’s had enough. He’s in. HE DDT’S CAPTAIN NAUSEA TO THE MAT! LOCKE AND LOADE HAVE HIM UP…HERE IT COMES…WHAM! FOUR-D REDNECK DEATHBLAST! LOCKE COVERS…1 …2 …3!”

WINNER: ‘THE RAVING REDNECKS’ LOCKE AND LOADE in 6:32

Suave: “LOCKE AND LOADE WITH THE WIN OVER THE ISLAND OF MISFIT WRESTLERS! MORE PCW AFTER THIS.”
________________________________
_______COMMERCIAL BREAK_____

Every Thursday Night from our friends at High Octane Wrestling

The Best Arena, Chicago IL
November 19, 2009 12:00 AM

Bobbinette “Queen B” Carey v Chris Kostoff
The referee for this match is Rick “Even” Stevens, and the rules are HOFC Bout.

Justin Decent v Rush Marconi
The referee for this match is Joel Hortega, and the rules are Standard Match.

David Black© v Dawn McGill
The referee for this match is Matt Boettcher, and the rules are Standard Match.

“The Headhunter” Michael DeNucci© v DavoteK
The referee for this match is Rick “Even” Stevens, and the rules are HOFC Bout.

Jatt Starr v Ethan Cavanaugh
The referee for this match is Matt Boettcher, and the rules are Standard Match.

Max Kael© v Chris CK
The referee for this match is Joel Hortega, and the rules are Standard Match.
_______________________

Dream Wrestling Federation

Bishop Steele vs. Force

Adrien Cochrane vs. Daymare

Remy Leroux vs. Marshall

Upton Osgood vs. Zero

Company Policy vs. eGG Bandits vs.
Brothers of Prophecy vs. chicKEN Chokers
Non- Title 8 Man Tag

Lupin Cy vs. Jay Price vs. 501
Triple Threat

___________________________
___________________________

Suave: “Speaking of Dawn McGill. She once again took High Octane Wrestling’s ICON Champion Max Kael to the limit this past Thursday night.

(courtesy of High Octane Wrestling)
REPLAY: ICON Champion Max Kael vs. Dr. Annabel Lecktor
…Rubbing her eyes Lecktor starts getting angry as she walks over to the timekeepers and grabs a steel chair as she slides back into the ring and goes after Max with the chair, who ducks the swing and takes Lecktor down with a drop kick to her knees. But instead of continuing his offense, Max again tries to rip the mask off Lecktor. She fights him off once again and hits him hard with a backfist which allows her to use the steel chair, cracking Max across the skull. She discards it as she grabs Max’s leg and goes for the pin.

Joe Hoffman: Max tried again for that mask and he ate that steel chair as a result. But we have no referee to make the count.

Suddenly we see HOFC referee Rick Stevens start to sprint down and slide into the ring as he starts to make the count for the pinfall.

1……2…….NO!!!

Max Kael is able to kickout as Stevens gets up from the mat and seems a bit lost inside a ring as a stunned Max gets back up to his feet and Lecktor goes for another spinning heel kick which this time does connect with Kael as she quickly locks in the testicular claw on Max as Stevens isn’t really sure if this is a legal move as he asks Max if he wants to submit.

Joe Hoffman: A quite unique submission move by Lecktor as she has a firm grip on Max’s…..Max’s…..

Benny Newell: BALLS……I dropped my shot glass….what’s going on in the ring?

Max seems to be in immense pain as he pulls himself over to the ropes slowly as Lecktor tries and pull Max back, which puts even more strain on a certain area of his body. Max continues to pull himself across the mat as he is able to grab onto the bottom rope as Stevens calls for Lecktor to release the hold and this time Max rolls out of the ring, realizing that he was very close to loosing the match.

Benny Newell: Did she just have his junk clamped in her hand? Damn! I usually have to pay to see shit like that.

Joe Hoffman: Glad you have decided to rejoin the match Benny.

Max storms around the ring before he slides back in and goes after Lecktor who ducks a wild punch and counters with a martial arts kick that Max is also able to duck as he drops to his knees and goes for a low blow on Lecktor which connects but has little affect on the lower female anatomy of Lecktor who smiles and shakes her head as she knees Kael in the head and goes for another pinfall on the ICON champion.

1……2……..3….

Joe Hoffman: Do we have an upset?

Max lifts his leg up onto the ropes as Stevens stops the count as Lecktor for a second thinks she has won the match before Stevens yells out “NO!” and the match continues on. Lecktor is down messing around as she lifts Max up from the mat and places his head between her legs and lefts him up onto her shoulders.

Joe Hoffman: A great showing of Lecktor’s strength lifting Max Kael who looks a good 50 pounds heavier then her.

Benny Newell: You sure I’m not paying to see this?

Lecktor has Max up in the air and Max again tries to pull the mask of Lecktor off….but realizing that he is about to be dropped to the mat he delivers a couple quick punches to Lecktor which allows him to escape from the powerbomb she was attempting and connect with a jawbreaker that dazes the masked female and sends her down to the mat for a moment as she pulls herself back up to her feet.

Joe Hoffman: I don’t like where this is heading for Lecktor….Max has turned his attention from the mask…

Benny Newell: Did I mention you should be wearing a mask instead of her yet?

Joe Hoffman: Yes….you mentioned that.

Benny Newell: Good….

Benny tosses another shot back, as Max stares at the dazed Lecktor for a few brief seconds before Max connects another European uppercut and then he hooks her neck and hit the lightning spiral on her which lays her out in the middle of the ring as he goes for the cover that Rick Stevens slides in to count.

Joe Hoffman: The Singularity….thanks for coming Lecktor.

1………2………..3…………..

Stevens calls for the bell as Max’s music plays but Max is not concerned with the victory he has just gotten or celebrating it.

Bryan McVay: The winner of this match in 11 minutes and 39 seconds….MAX KAEL!!!

Max just stares at Lecktor as instead of getting up from the mat he reaches over to Lecktor and with her out he reaches for her mask and slowly removes it from her face, revealing that it is not Annabel Lecktor…..

Joe Hoffman: Dawn McGill?!? Dawn was really the girl under the Lecktor mask. For the second week in a row she pushed Max to the limit, nearly defeating the ICON champion.

Shocked that the woman under the mask is Dawn, Max slowly get back to his feet as Dawn starts to stir on the mat. Max continues staring in shock as she climbs back up to her feet, starting too look back at Max Kael, who is surprisingly looking at her with a look of respect, maybe for pushing him to the edge for the second week in a row.

Joe Hoffman: Well it seems McGill wanted to get Max Kael’s attention and it seems with her showing tonight that she has gotten that and dare I say some respect from the ICON champion?

‘Hollywood A-Lister’ Stone Chism is in the ring with the Skanky Rich Bimbos Paris Hilton and Lindsay Lohan. Chism: “Okay. Why would you want to watch a fake icon when you can see a REAL icon right here…me.” Chism then parades the SRB around and then wants to know who the next person is who’s going to do the right thing and ‘lay down in the ring for him?’

Movie Classic comes out with the 375 pound Jobber the Hut lumbering right behind him. Suave: “Jobber the Hut is good for about a half a minute…after that…forget it.”

MATCH #3- Non-Title Match
PCW Champion ‘Hollywood A-Lister’ Stone Chism w/The Skanky Rich Bimbos
vs.
Jobber the Hut (Island of Misfit Wrestlers)(The bell rings) Suave: “There’s the bell. Chism is goofing off…not a good idea in the first thirty seconds of the match…JOBBER HOOKS HIM IN A FULL NELSON!” Jobber rams Chism into the corner turnbuckle over and over. Suave: “CHISM IN TROUBLE…COVER HIM! COVER HIM!” Paris Hilton and Lindsay Lohan hit the ring. Suave: “NO! Wait…I mean…YES!” Hilton and Lohan get Jobber’s attention and then whip their tops off. Suave: “WARDROBE MALFUNCTION! WARDROBE MALFUNCTION!” Chism pulls himself up. Suave: “OHHHH! CHISM GOES LOW AND JOBBER IS BENT OVER. CHISM FLOATS AROUND…NECKBREAKER! COVER!” Davey Keels counts. …1 …2 …3!

WINNER: ‘HOLLYWOOD A-LISTER’ STONE CHISM in :49

Suave: “AGAIN, THANKS TO THE SKANKY RICH BIMBOS, STONE CHISM GETS ANOTHER WIN IN PCW!”

PCW NEWSLINE w/ GINA RAMSEY
Gina: “PCW CEO Barack Obama again fends off questions about his association with jailed High Octane Wrestling owner Lee Best. Anita Dunn and her A.D.D. crew continue to try to change the conversation to Fox News by blaming Fox’s association with the American Patriots for fueling the controversy. But as Best’s trial in January looms in the future, could the PCW CEO be drawn in?

“In other news, Lou Dobbs leaves CNN. Rumor has it that he could become a spokesperson for the American Heartland Coalition. The AHC refused all comment on the matter.

“University of New Mexico soccer player Elizabeth Lambert has been offered a contract by PCW.

No word on whether she’s accepted the offer.”

UPCOMING PCW EVENTS:
11/18- PCW House Show
11/21- PCW Extreme Political TV on P-SPAN
12/2- PCW House Show
12/5- PCW Extreme Political TV on P-SPAN
12/9- PCW House Show
12/12- PCW/MVW Night of Champions
12/20- WWR ‘Christmas in the Caribbean’ Supershow in Puerto De Macoris
12/26- PCW Year End in Review
______________________
______________________

The crowd boos as Dr. Bill strolls down the aisle. Suave: “Dr. Bill has kept a low profile since his claim that Dr. Annabel ‘The Cannibal’ Lecktor bit off his arm was proved to be a hoax. But what is up with the steel bracing and stuff on his arm?” Dr. Bill: “SHUT UP!” He raises his arm up. Dr. Bill: “DO YOU SEE WHAT THAT CANNIBAL DR. LECKTOR DID TO ME?” Suave: “Ah…no she didn’t.”

Charlene Ann Beckworth in the ring to announce the Main Event. Charlene Ann: “Weighing in at 233 pounds, from Berlin, Germany, accompanied by Dr. Bill, Baron Von Munchke! His opponent…” Von Munchke grimaces when the crowd boos him.

*Bobby Bare’s Tequila Sheila begins to play*

Suave: “And here comes the American Trucker being led to the ring by Tequila Sheila.”

Charlene Ann: “…weighing in at 225 pounds, from Gary, Indiana, a member of American Heartland Coalition, accompanied by Tequila Sheila, American Trucker!!!”

MAIN EVENT:
‘The King of Old School Gimmicks’ Baron Von Munchke w/Dr. Bill (Old School Kings)
vs.
American Trucker w/Tequila Sheila (American Heartland Coalition)
…Suave: “Von Munchke with a short lariat and puts the American Trucker to the mat. Von Munchke slides down and tries to grapevine American Trucker’s arm. Trucker pulls the arm back and slides away. Both men now circling each other. They lock up. American Trucker shoves Von Munchke back…spinning back kick on Von Munchke! American Trucker with a waistlock…belly to belly suplex! He covers…1 …2…NO! Von Munchke slips out! Kick to the face by American Trucker. Von Munchke pushes back. He pins American Trucker against the ropes and…CHOKES HIM WITH HIS FOREARM! TEQUILA SHEILA UP ON THE APRON…SHE GETS PUSHED OFF BY VON MUNCHKE. FIREMAN’S CARRY BY VON MUNCHKE…AND HE SLAMS HIM TO THE GROUND! NOW DR. BILL UP ON THE APRON WITH HIS…BIONIC ARM…whatever…HE SWINGS…TRUCKER DUCKS!” Von Munchke gets the full force of the steel enhanced punch. American Trucker with new life…slingshot elbow drop to Von Munchke. American Trucker rains down punches now. Headscissors takeover on Von Munchke. Von Munchke lifted up…JAKE BRAKE! JAKE BRAKE! American Trucker covers…1 …2 …3!”

WINNER: AMERICAN TRUCKER in 11:55

Suave: “AMERICAN TRUCKER WINS AND BARON VON MUNCHKE IS PISSED! HE’S GLARING AT DR. BILL AND I WOULDN’T WANT TO BE IN HIS SHOES RIGHT NOW! WE’LL SEE YOU NEXT WEEK!”

———————————

More political news:

More on obamacare: devils in the details
A Tale of Two Cities
Two Sets of Justice
Old Yellers
Keith Olbermann and Michael Musto on Carrie Prejean Running From Larry King
Olbermann ridicules O’Reilly for calling Ft Hood terrorism
Olbermann Mocks Lou Dobbs
Palin is great for the GOP, Giuliani says
Giuliani weighs on GOP unity, NY-23 race
Obama adviser won’t be buying Palin’s new book
The Volokh Conspiracy » Blog Archive » Politics and Poker — er, I …
Money, politics and the wildlife board – CharlotteObserver.com
Liberal Conspiracy » Launch: What is radical politics today?
New Icelandic supermarket brings politics to the high street …
Sarah Palin Trashes American Justice – TalkLeft: The Politics Of Crime
The Political Carnival: Palin: “There’s no better training ground …
FiveThirtyEight: Politics Done Right: How the Swine Flu Has Spread
Joe. My. God.: Our Drug Puppet Congress
The Absurd Report » “Murphy’s Law” By Jim Murphy
McCain Campaign Emails Contradict Palin’s “Going Rogue”
McCain Urges Town Hall Attendees To Cut Up AARP Membership Cards
POLITICAL HOT TOPICS: November 16, 2009
Palin is great for the GOP, Giuliani says

W o rdPress.com Political Blogger Alliance

Filed under: Average Joe, Barack Obama, Blogs- Pro Wrestling, Independents, Joe the Plumber, Paul Heyman, Politics, Pro Wrestling, Small Town America, Third Party, democrats, joe six pack, political satire, political wrestling, red state, republicans, wordpress political blogs | Tagged: Blue Dog Democrat, Elizabeth Lambert, Keith Olbermann, Levi Johnston, Lindsay Lohan, Paris Hilton, RINO, Sarah Palin, Shannyn Moore | 2 Comments »

Tonight on PCW Extreme Political TV…

Posted on November 14, 2009 by Political Championship Wrestling

PCW= TAKING POLITICAL EXTREME TO THE EXTREME

Blue Dog D and RINO
vs.
Newcomer Shaun Phillips and T-Bag (American Patriots)

Raving Rednecks Locke and Loade (American Patriots)
vs.
Island of Misfit Wrestlers

American Trucker (American Heartland Coalition)
vs.
Baron Von Munchke w/Dr. Bill (Old School Kings)

PCW Champion Stone Chism (Progressive Alliance)
vs.
Jobber the Hut (Island of Misfit Wrestlers)

Newcomer Shaun Phillips (formerly Shaun XF at Dream Wrestling) is brought in by American Patriots Executive Director Eric Cantor and teams up with T-Bag against the Bipartisan Dream Team Blue Dog D and RINO. Can Phillips, with the Club For Growth and Red State on board, help get the AP back on track?

PCW Originals ‘Raving Rednecks’ Locke and Loade return to take another run at the PCW Tag Team title. Their road begins with a match against the Island of Misfit Wrestlers’ Captain Nausea and Mr. Jaundice.

In singles action, former PCW Television Champion ‘King of Old School Gimmicks’ Baron Von Munchke starts on his trek back up the ladder with a match against the always tough American Trucker from the American Heartland Coalition. Von Munchke’s manager Dr. Bill has kept a low profile since his claim that Dr. Annabel ‘The Cannibal’ Lecktor bit off his arm was proved to be a hoax. Can the Dr. Bill wannabe/self-help kinda guru lead Von Munchke back to TV Title contention? Or has he bitten off more than he can chew…ha…ha…right.

Finally, the PCW Champion will be in action as ‘Hollywood A-Lister’ Stone Chism takes on the always tough (for at least the first thirty seconds) Jobber the Hut.

Plus:
PCW CEO Barack Obama continues to deflect any connection he may have had with jailed owner of High Octane Wrestling, Lee Best.

Are the American Patriots finally getting their act together?

Plus, Sarah Palin signs some books.

All this and more tonight on PCW Extreme Political TV.

Filed under: Blogs- Pro Wrestling, Independents, Joe the Plumber, Politics, Pro Wrestling, Small Town America, Third Party, democrats, joe six pack, political satire, political wrestling, red state, republicans | 1 Comment »

PCW/MVW House Show…Show

Posted on November 12, 2009 by Political Championship Wrestling

PCW’s Johnny Suave: “What do you get with PCW/MVW House Show…Show?
MVW’s Tessa Martin: “You get one hour of non-stop wrestling.”

MATCH #1 from PCW House Show in Jackson, OH
Paddy O’Kennedy (Progressive Alliance)
vs.
T-Bag (American Patriots)
…O’Kennedy climbs to the top rope and executes a Shooting Star Press putting T-Bag through a table! Next, O’Kennedy climbs to the top of the turnbuckle and lands the diving headbutt on T-Bag. T-Bag moves back to his feet and gets taken down with a corkscrew armdrag. O’Kennedy puts T-Bag thru a table with an elbow drop from the top rope! O’Kennedy puts the sleeper hold on T-Bag. Referee Davey Keels is checking for a tap out. …he lifts T-Bag’s arm up…it flops to the mat. He lifts it a second time. It falls again. Keels lifts the arm a third time…it flops to the canvas. Keels calls for the bell.

WINNER: Paddy O’Kennedy (Progressive Alliance) in 7:37

Post match, the Angry Left Wing Bloggers (Jane Hamsher, Paul Krugman, Daily Kos, Eric Alterman) attack T-Bag and ‘all Tea-Baggers in America.’ The Club 4 Growth plus Shawn Hannity and Bill O’Reilly of Fox News make the save.

MATCH #2 from MVW House Show in Salina, Kansas
MVW Television Title Match
Carrieanne McDermott (c)
vs.
‘Extreme Pizza Delivery Chick ‘Tessa’ Mason
…McDermott hits a power slam on Mason. McDermott follows up with an elbowdrop. The she dropkicks Mason to the face. McDermott nails Mason with an inverted DDT. Mason on the ropes. McDermott thrust kicks he in the head. Mason topples over. Davey Keels counts the pin. …1 …2 …3

WINNER AND STILL MVW TELEVISION CHAMPION: Carrieanne McDermott in 8: 18

Postmatch: McDermott gets blindsided by a returning Brooke ‘The Manchester Masterpiece’ Evans and security has to pull the two women apart.

MATCH #3 from PCW’s House Show in Pepper Pike, Ohio
PCW Tag Team Television Match
Public Utilities: Big Oil and Big Electric with Texas Tex (c)
vs.
Average Joe and American Trucker (American Heartland Coalition)

…Big Electric climbs to the top of the turnbuckle and nails the diving headbutt on Average Joe. Big Electric hits a reverse neckbreaker and then nails Average Joe with a belly-to-back suplex. Big Oil in the ring to set up a chair. Big Electric grabs Average Joe’s face….and drives it into the chair!! Big Electric lifts Average Joe up…Electric Chair facebuster. Cover. Davey Keels makes the easy count. …1 …2 …3

WINNERS AND STILL PCW TAG TEAM TELEVISION CHAMPIONS: Big Oil and Big Electric…aka Public Utilities in 11:22

Post match, General R.C. Patton, A. Tom Bomb, and Hy Drogen Bomb run-in and challenge Public Utilities for the title. Rough Justice then runs down and Public Utilities slinks to the back.

MATCH #4
MVW Tag Team Title match from Topeka, Kansas
Angels of Death: Angel Casey and Angel Scott (c)
vs.
Sabrina James and Alicia Rowe

Alicia Rowe drags Angel Scott to the floor. Davey Keels starts the count (.1) (..2) Scott faceslams Rowe to the floor. (…3) Sabrina James runs over and slaps Scott in the face. James trys for a tilt-a-whirl powerslam but is not strong enough to lift Scott.(….4) Rowe from behind chokes Scott with a microphone cable. Rowe jumps onto Scott’s shoulders, twists, and DDT’s her onto the floor. Rowe drags Scott back into the ring. Rowe kicks Scott in the stomach and then hits the sitdown face slam. James also in the ring and slaps on a guillotine choke on Scott. Rowe hammers Scott with an elbow drop out of the corner. Angel Scott climbs to his feet. Angel Casey hits the ring and suplexes Rowe. Casey sets Rowe up with a side headlock and DDTs her to the mat. Casey executes a neck breaker. Scott, slightly recovered, covers Rowe hooking the leg. Referee Davey Keels makes the count. …1 …2 …3

WINNERS AND STILL MVW TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS: Angels of Death in 14:21

MATCH #5
PCW Tag Team Title Match from Jackson, Ohio
‘No Frills’ Chris Escondido and ‘American Citizen’ Kevin Scott (American Heartland Coalition) (c)
vs.
Charlie Ranck and Pete Fyle aka…Ranck and Fyle (Progressive Alliance)
…Fyle gets locked into the American Stars and Fuji Armbar by Scott. Davey Keels asks Fyle if he quits. … Scott tightens the hold. … The referee calls for the break. Scott fist drops Fyle to the mat. Scott follows with the belly-to-belly suplex. Scott sets a table up and drapes Fyle across it. He moonsaults from the top rope and sends Fyle through the table! Anita Dunn leads the Progressive Alliance down. Scott puts the chair on Fyle’s head…he leg drops Fyle’s face! Davey Keels counts the pin. …1 …2 …3

WINNER AND STILL PCW TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS: ‘No Frills’ Chris Escondido and ‘American Citizen’ Kevin Scott in 10:03

PCW Extreme Political TV on P-SPAN

Posted on November 8, 2009 by Political Championship Wrestling

PCW Extreme Political TV
Wesbanco Arena
Wheeling, West Virginia
Saturday November 7th
Host: Johnny Suave

*10 bell tribute to the troops at Fort Hood who were murdered this week*

Suave goes through the PCW Rankings…

PCW WORLD CHAMPION: ‘Hollywood A-Lister’ Stone Chism (Progressive Alliance)
PCW TELEVISION CHAMPION: SNAFU (Independent)
CONTENDERS:
#1- Starz N. Stripes (Progressive Alliance)
#2- Khalid-El (Axis of Evil)
#3- Bird ‘The Mark’ Ridfych (Independent)
#4- ‘The King of Old School Gimmicks’ Baron Von Munchke (Old School Kings)
#5- Newt Tron Bomb (American Patriots)
#6- American Trucker (American Heartland Coalition)

Tonight on PCW Extreme Political TV:
The Goatbusters vs. The Green World Order
Jack and Bull Schett vs. The Extreme Weather Network
Rough Justice vs. A-Bomb and H-Bomb
MAIN EVENT:
PCW’s Latest Rookie Sensation Bird ‘The Mark’ Ridfych vs. PCW Television Champion SNAFU for the TV Title.

In the ring, Suave talks to A-Bomb and H-Bomb and their new manager, General R.C. Patton. Patton calls Public Utilities a bunch of pansies after using Rough Justice: D.B. Ruff and Connor Justice- two former police officers fired for their extreme brand of justice, to give them a numerical advantage Tuesday night.

REPLAY: PCW TAG TEAM TELEVISION TITLE FINALS A-Bomb and H-Bomb (American Patriots) vs. Big Oil and Big Electric (Public Utilities) vs. D.B. Ruff and Connor Justice aka…Rough Justice
Justice bounces A-Bomb off the barricade while Ruff clotheslines him. Ruff is back on his feet. Big Oil lifts A-Bomb into the air. Holds him and drops him into the chair!! Big Oil sucks chants start in the crowd. Ruff throws A-Bomb back into the ring. Big Oil and Ruff also move back into the ring. Big Oil picks up the chair….Big Oil slams the chair into A-Bomb’s face!! A-Bomb is busted open! H-Bomb in the ring. Big Oil chops H-Bomb. Big Oil sucks chants start in the crowd. Big Oil choke slams A-Bomb who looks to be out cold! Powerbomb by Big Oil on the chair!!! The ref starts the count. …1 …2 …3.

Patton: “Battle is the most magnificent competition in which a human being can indulge. It brings out all that is best; it removes all that is base. All men are afraid in battle. The coward is the one who lets his fear overcome his sense of duty. Duty is the essence of manhood. Public Utilities, you’re cowards. Stop hiding and come out here and give A-Bomb and H-Bomb the title shot they deserve.”

Rough Justice, Public Utilities (Big Oil and Big Electric with Texas Tex), and Extreme Attorneys Felcher and Felcher come out. Texas Tex accepts the offer. But then Felcher and Felcher produce a contractual agreement that states that as a condition of their employment Rough Justice will defend Public Utilities. Texas Tex then tenders the defense to Rough Justice. It’ll be Rough Justice vs. A-Bomb and H-Bomb later on tonight.

Suave then runs through the highlights from The Goatbusters-GWO match earlier in the night.

MATCH #1
The Goatbusters w/Movie Classic (Island of Misfit Wrestlers)
vs.
GreenPete and ‘Extreme Vegan’ Brock Cole Lee (Green World Order)

The GWO already in the ring.

*Spooky music begins followed by a funky beat*

Charlene Ann: “…The GOATBUSTERS!” The Goatbusters appear and begin to dance down the aisle. Movie Classic accompanies them.

If there’s something grazing
In your neighborhood
Who you gonna call
(Goatbusters)
If you see a herd
And it don’t look good
Who you gonna call
(Goatbusters)

I ain’t afraid of no Goat
I ain’t afraid of no Goat

If you’re seeing horns
Running through your yard
Who can you call
(Goatbusters)
If you have a goat
Sleeping in your bed
Oh, who you gonna call
(Goatbusters)

I ain’t afraid of no Goat
I ain’t afraid of no Goat

Who you gonna call
(Goatbusters)
If you’re all alone
Pick up the phone
And call
(Goatbusters)

I ain’t afraid of no Goat
I hear it likes the girls
I ain’t afraid of no Goat
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah

Who you gonna call
(Goatbusters)
If you’ve had a dose
Of a freaky Goat
Maybe you’d better call
(Goatbusters)

Let me tell you something
Bustin’ makes me feel good

I ain’t afraid of no Goat
I ain’t afraid of no Goat

Don’t get caught alone, oh no
(Goatbusters)
When it comes through your door
Unless you just want some more
I think you better call
(Goatbusters)
Ow

Who you gonna call
(Goatbusters)
Who you gonna call
(Goatbusters)
Ah, I think you better call
(Goatbusters)…

The Goatbusters, Peter Jenkman and Ray Scantz climb into the ring…

…Lee applies an arm wrench to Jenkman. Jenkman reverses and gets back to his corner to make the tag to Scantz. Scantz out in a house of fire…swinging neckbreaker to Lee. Body slam by Scantz. Lee desperately throws Scantz to the floor. Lee chops Scantz. Lee then eats a spinning back kick by the Goatbuster…

…Brock Cole Lee moves back to his feet. Bulldog to Scantz. Lee pulls Scantz back up…neck breaker. GreenPete sets a table up as Lee climbs to the top rope…Shooting Star Press puts Scantz thru a table! Lee pins Ray Scantz with a rolling cradle. Referee Davey Keels makes the count. …1 …2 …3

WINNER: The Green World Order in 10:30

Suave: “So a big victory for the Green World Order as they knock off the Goatbusters. We’ll be back after these messages.”

—————————–

MISSOURI VALLEY WRESTLING ASSOCIATION

Taking Women’s E-Wrestling to a Whole Different Level

————————————————————

Every Thursday Night from our friends at High Octane Wrestling

———————————–

The PCW Tag Team Champions ‘No Frills’ Chris Escondido and Starz N. Stripes come to the ring.

REPLAY from 10/31-PCW EXTREME POLITICAL TV ON P-SPAN: Starz N. Stripes- PCW Champion ‘Hollywood A-Lister’ Stone Chism confrontation
Starz calls for a microphone and Charlene Ann Beckworth, the ring announcer, hands him one. Starz: “Chism, let me get this straight.” Escondido turns him to face Chism. Starz: “Oh…Chism, let me get this straight. After you took me out a few weeks back and then my tag team partner and co-holder of the PCW Tag Team title, Chris Escondido, you still expect me to do the j-o-b for you? Hell no!” The crowd cheers; Chism throws a fit…

…Escondido takes the Tag Team Title belt and blasts Chism in the mush with it.Suave: “ESCONDIDO JUST DECKED THE CHAMPION!” Immediately, the Hollywood Left pour out to the ring: George Clooney, Susan Sarandon, Tim Robbins, Sean Penn, Michael Moore, Matt Damon, and Alec Baldwin. They attack Escondido. Suave: “SEVEN AGAINST ONE! HOW FAIR IS THAT?” No one notices Starz N. Stripes slowly unwrapping the gauze from his eyes. Suave: “WAIT! HERE COMES THE AMERICAN HEARTLAND COALITION!” American Trucker, Dave the Mechanic, Average Joe, SNAFU, and Tequila Sheila race down. Starz’s eyes are totally unwrapped and he calls for a chair. Tequila Sheila obliges and slides it in under the bottom rope. Suave: “WAIT! STARZ CAN SEE! STARZ CAN SEE? *CLANG* CHAIRSHOT TO GEORGE CLOONEY. *CLANG* CHAIRSHOT TO TIM ROBBINS! *CLANG* CHAIRSHOT TO MATT DAMON!” Trucker, Dave, Joe, and SNAFU whip Michael Moore into the ropes. Tequila Sheila pulls the top rope down and Moore goes Ric Flair over the top rope except he misses the ring apron and crashes to the floor…

Starz announces that he and Escondido are leaving the Progressive Alliance and joining the American Heartland Coalition. Starz then adds that he will be known from tonight forward as ‘American Citizen’ Kevin Scott.

Obama aide Anita Dunn comes out with the A.D.D. (Anita Dunn Disciples) accuses the PCW Tag Team Champions of being corrupted by the evil lies of Fox News. Escondido tells her the actions of the Progressive Alliance in the video replays just shown speak for themselves. Dunn then suggests that Escondido and Scott should vacate the titles because they were won when they were members of the Progressive Alliance. Scott tells Dunn *they* won the belts; not the Progressive Alliance. If she wants the belts, come on down and try and take them.

The A.D.D. do just that but immediately American Trucker, Tequila Sheila,
Dave the Mechanic, Average Joe, SNAFU, and Dawn McGill of the American Heartland Coalition run down and makes the save.

Suave then runs through highlights of the Jack and Bull Schett/Extreme Weather Network match from earlier.

MATCH #2
Jack Schett and Bull Schett w/Horst Schett and Hans Gruber- the Extreme German Schnauzer (Ron Paul’s New Libertarian Army)
vs.
Steve Abrams and Mike Bettis w/Jim Frascantore, Jen, Steph, and Kristina (Extreme Weather Network )

Suave: “The usual introduction for the Schetts with Ron Paul and Aimee Allen leading them to the ring.”

Wake up! Wake up!
Good morning America!
Rise and Shine.

Ron Paul! Save our constitutional rights
Ron Paul! We’re not gonna give up the fight
Ron Paul! Start a revolution
and break down illegal institutions

…Running neckbreaker drop by Abrams takes Bull Schett down hard. Abrams slaps the sleeperhold on Bull. Referee Davey Keels asks Bull if he quits. Jack Schett in the ring with a forearm to the back and Abrams breaks the hold. Jen in the ring? She punches Jack repeatedly. Jack just throws her down. Abrams makes the tag to Mike Bettis. Bull goes right for Bettis and hits a reverse neckbreaker. Bettis back to his feet and catches Bull with a spinning DDT and planting his head to the mat. Bettis stomps Bull’s head. Table set up in the ring by Abrams. Bettis puts Bull through the table with an elbow drop from the top rope! Bettis covers. Abrams blocks Jack from interfering. The ref counts…1 …2 …3.

WINNER: The Extreme Weather Network in 7:11

Suave: “Another mild upset here tonight as the Extreme Weather Network rebounds from a tough loss to NCISF’d to get the win over the Schett’s tonight.”

Suave does a quick story on the exploits of one Dawn McGill who debuted this past week on High Octane Wrestling’s Turmoil show…

(courtesy of High Octane Wrestling)
REPLAY: ICON Champion Max Kael vs. Dawn McGill
Referee Matt Boettcher steps in and takes the ICON title from Max, presenting it to the crowd as the ICON champion paces on the far side of the ring. As the ICON title is handed off Boettcher ensures that Dawn sets her cane outside the ring before he signals for the bell.

Max smirks at Dawn as he struts into the center of the room and holds up his left hand as if to challenge her into a test of strength. She moves forward and shakes her head at Max before knee him in the groin, a perfectly legal maneuver for a female to utilize against a male!

The ICON Champion’s face goes pale as he drops down to his knees before he gets a knee to his own face from his challenger. Dawn keeps up the advantage, dropping a series of elbows across Max Kael’s chest before rolling him up for a pin fall!

1! 2! Kickout!…

…Slipping out of the ring after Dawn he flips off Matt Boettcher who yells at the ICON Champion to get back into the ring. Max grabs a steel chair and begins to stalk Dawn who is still slightly disoriented. Lifting the chair Max swings down toward Dawn as the crowd boos loudly!

CRACK!

Dawn rolls out of the way as Max strikes the steel pole of the ring causing him to drop the chair as the shock of impact causes his bones to shake! Boettcher yells at Max who is completely aware as Dawn grabs her cane, turning toward him. As Max slowly rises to his feet..

CRACK!

The cane shatters across the side of Max Kael who slumps to the ground in a heap! Matt Boettcher turns his head at the last moment apparently willing to let Max take the shot after he was treated poorly by the ICON Champion! The fans cheer loudly as Dawn tosses her cane to the side and rolls him into the ring where he lays still.

Climbing in after him, Dawn grabs him by the head and hoists him up…

AWESOME BOMB!

The limp body of the ICON Champion is carefully cradled into a pinning position by Dawn!

1!! 2!!! KICKOUT!…

…Groggily both fighters manage to get to their feet at about the same time and turn toward eachother!

Dawn with a right hand across Max Kael’s face sending him stumbling into the ropes..

Max answers back with a forearm smash which sends Dawn into the ropes!

Dawn answers back with another stiff right hand!

Max with a Forearm!

Dawn with a right hand!

Max seems dazed as Dawn fires another right hand! And another! And Anoth-

Max ducks and hits a quick knee to Dawns gut!

WITCHBURNER!

Driving his hand into Dawn’s temple, Max collapses on Dawn and hooks the leg! Matt Boettcher drops down!

1!! 2!!! 3!!!!

Suave: “So, McGill in her first match takes the ICON Champion Max Kael to the max before losing in just over seventeen minutes. Next, the Rough Justice- A-Bomb/H-Bomb match…”

MATCH #3
Rough Justice: D.B. Ruff and Connor Justice- two former police officers fired for their extreme brand of justice. (Public Utilities)
vs.
A-Bomb and H-Bomb w/General R.C. Patton and Daisy Cutter-Bomb (American Patriots)

…Hy Drogen Bomb knocks D.B. Ruff into Davey Keels taking out the referee. H-Bomb goes up top and hits a frog splash on Ruff. H-Bomb follows with a corkscrew legdrop. Big Oil and Big Electric come to the ring. Big Oil clotheslines H-Bomb. Big Electric lifts H-Bomb for an Electric Chair Facebuster. A-Bomb jumps in and cuts Big Electric’s legs out from under him. Daisy Cutter-Bomb in the ring…she clotheslines Ruff. Daisy mule kicks Big Oil. General Patton cracks his horse whip on Justice’s back. Daisy lifts Ruff…Daisy Cutter Power Bomb! Big Oil sends Hy Drogen Bomb to the corner of the ring. Big Oil chops Hy Drogen Bomb. Keels backs up. A-Bomb knees D.B. Ruff and rolls back to his feet. H-Bomb rolls up and goes to the top turnbuckle. A-Bomb pulls Ruff up and hands him to H-Bomb. Top rope powerbomb by H-Bomb aka BLUNT FORCE TRAUMA! Ruff is out cold! Referee Davey Keels makes the count. …1 …2 …3

WINNER: A-Bomb and H-Bomb in 8:22

Post match, General Patton again calls out Public Utilities. Patton: “Don’t tell people how to do things, tell them what to do and let them surprise you with their results. Public Utilities, I challenged these men to raise their game and they have. Now, I challenge you. Wars may be fought with weapons, but they are won by men. It is the spirit of men who follow and of the man who leads that gains the victory. Or in other words, get your asses out here and stop hiding behind the skirts of your Corporate Attorneys.”

————————

Every Monday Night from our friends at High Octane Wrestling

——————————–

Dream Wrestling Federation

——————————–

Suave: “PCW CEO Barack Obama won a victory in his quest to give the PCW workers universal health care. But will the first step forward continue to be overshadowed by his association with jailed High Octane Wrestling owner Lee Best?”

REPLAY: High Octane Wrestling Turmoil
Joe Hoffman:
Folks welcome to Thursday Night Aceldama and folks we are starting off tonight’s show with a bang…..Lee Best live from jail!!

Joe’s mic is shut off as the lights in the arena go out and only the first few rows nearest the entrance ramp are visible as the HOV is the only source of light in the arena.

Knowing that he is now being aired live on HOTv and inside his own arena, Lee smirks before beginning his address.

Lee Best:
Tonight I come to you bound and shackled to a chair that is not my own, inside a room that is not inside my house, and by actions not done by me, but by my own brother….Michael Oliver Best.

The crowd pops at the mention of the new sheriff in town.

Lee Best:
You cheer the man that has put me behind bars? The man that turned his back on his own family just to get into a position of power himself? You cheer my BROTHER??

The crowd erupts into a MIKEY chant and the sound of thousands of High Octane fans chanting his brother’s name is too much for Lee and he begins to thrash about in the chair as the crowd continues…

MIKEY

Lee Best:
SHUT THE FUCK UP YOU UNGRATEFUL PIECES OF SHIIIIIIT!!!

Lee is literally frothing at the mouth as he spits venom at the crowd inside the arena that bears his name.

Lee Best:
Do you idiots not understand that you are sitting in MY ARENA…..attending a show I CREATED…on a network I STARTED?? DO YOU NOT GET IT???

The crowd turns from a loud MIKEY chant to a loud BOOOOOO as Lee is literally leaning towards the camera as far as his restraints will allow.

Lee Best:
I am the GOD of HOW…I am the master and you are all my puppets…..but yet you naïve fuckers think Michael is there to save you from …ME?

The crowd now cheers in approval of the notion that Mike has indeed saved them from the tyranny that was Lee.

Lee Best:
Fine…believe and feel how you want but I know the truth and trust me the truth of what is going on here is a lot uglier than anything I have ever pulled. Michael is pulling your strings and he has pulled the wool over the eyes over each and every HOW superstar in the locker room….but Michael knows he hasn’t fooled me. He KNOWS that the only way he would become relevant in his life was to try and out do me….he thinks by one upping me that his life will take on some form of a higher meaning…that folks is LAUGHABLE….

The crowd lets Lee hear it as they boo louder and louder and Lee just sits back and smiles and motions to a man off camera to bring him something and we see a bailiff open up a folder and lay it on Lee’s lap and Lee looks down and just shakes his head in amazement…

Lee Best:
Do you fuckers want to hear the charges or not?

The crowd instantly clams up as they and the rest of the world have been waiting for this moment..

Lee Best:
I thought so…You see folks I have no problem letting the world know what idiotic charges my brother has brought forth on me as I have no doubt in my mind that none of these charges will stick…

Lee pauses and then begins to read off the charges..

Lee Best:
I, Lee Best, have been charged with 104 counts of Aggravated Battery, look up the rest..etc..etc.

The crowd cheers as Lee finishes up the list and looks up at the camera and smiles..

Lee Best:
And not one fucking charge will stick and you know why? Because this is professional wrestling and this is all an act…a fucking entertainment show….none of this shit really happened…NONE OF IT….so this whole dog and pony act is just something for Michael to get his face on the fucking camera..none of this is….

“True?”

The crowd erupts as Mike Best comes out from the back and stops at the top of the entrance ramp and stares up at his incarcerated brother.

Mike Best:
Is that what you are implying Lee? That you stabbing Mindy Smith in the eye didn’t happen? That you didn’t hire Michael DeNucci and his thugs to kill Mindy before her book came out? How about the fact that a living and breathing CHILD was killed here in HOW….was that fake? Let’s ask Barbi Kostoff that question huh? What about the fact that you have committed adultery several times on LIVE Television..or the fact..

Lee Best:
WATCH IT MICHAEL……WATCH IT…

Joe Hoffman:
Adultery??

Mike Best:
Are you kidding me Lee….you think any of the people are buying the “its not real” crap. You have destroyed people’s lives and in some cases ended their lives…all in the name of what….huh tell me and the millions watching and the thousands standing right here in the arena named after YOU…WHY DID YOU DO THE THINGS YOU DID!!!??

Lee just stares at his younger brother and instead of answering Lee motions towards the bailiff and after a few seconds another bailiff appears on the other side of the Lee and the two men unshackle Lee and grab him firmly by the arm and lead him out of the room leaving everyone to stare at an empty chair.

Mike Best:
That’s it Lee..run away….run away like you do every time something goes wrong in your own little world…RUN AWAY LEE…..BUT WHEN YOU COME BACK AND WE KNOW YOU WILL…I WILL BE RIGHT HERE…WAITING……WAITING!!!!

Suave: “Obama continues to distance himself from Best and his spokesperson Robert Gibbs deflected all questions during his press briefings. But Anita Dunn spoke out and again blamed the influence of Fox News for ‘inflaming’ passions over the Best arrest and again accused Fox of being an arm of the American Patriots. The PCW Television Title match is next. Stay tuned.”

————————–

UPCOMING PCW EVENTS:
11/11- PCW House Show
11/14- PCW Extreme Political TV on P-SPAN
11/18- PCW House Show
11/21- PCW Extreme Political TV on P-SPAN
12/2- PCW House Show
12/5- PCW Extreme Political TV on P-SPAN
12/9- PCW House Show
12/12- PCW Extreme Political TV on P-SPAN
12/16- PCW House Show

—————————

GOLDEN DREAMS
November 8th, 2009

All Championship Titles Will Be On The Line!

PPV LINE UP
Bishop Steele vs. Remy Leroux

Jay Price vs Zero

Shot at the Title Match
Mad Max vs. Marshall

MVW-DWF Womens Championship Unification Match
MVW Champion Miss USA vs DWF Women’s Jill-Berg

DREAM Tag Team Championship Match
The eGG Bandits vs Brothers of Prophecy

Ultimate Jeopardy Caged Hell Elimination Match
Mike Polowy vs. Cancer Jiles vs. Jak Nemesis (c) vs. Doozer (c) vs. 501 vs. Daymare vs. Chris Bladez (c) vs Tyler Straven vs Upton Osgood vs. Travis Williams (c) vs. Lupin Cy vs. Adrien Cochrane

12 Men. One Steel Cell. Last man standing leaves DREAM Champion. Second to last man standing leaves DWF World Champion. Third leaves “You Call It” Champion.

Link: Dream Wrestling Federation

————————-

MAIN EVENT-PCW Television Title Match:
Bird ‘The Mark’ Ridfych (Independent)
vs.
PCW Television Champion SNAFU (American Heartland Coalition)

Ring Announcer Charlene Ann Beckworth in the ring.

Charlene Ann: This match is for the PCW Television Title. On his way to the ring at this time, weighing in at 235 pounds, from Rose City, MI, Bird ‘The Mark’ Ridfych!!!

Ridfych slaps hands with the fans on his way to the ring. Ridfych gets a broom and meticulously sweeps out his corner before bending down to remove a piece of debris.

Charlene Ann: “His opponent, weighing in at 225 pounds, from Norway, Maine, a member of the American Heartland Coalition and accompanied by Dawn McGill, he is the PCW Television Champion- SNAFU!!!”

McGill leads SNAFU to the ring.

Suave: “PCW Latest Rookie Sensation Bird ‘The Mark’ Ridfych in his sternest test yet against the PCW Television Champion, SNAFU. SNAFU, as you all know, learned much of what he knows about wrestling from watching SABU DVD’s.”

(the bell rings) Suave: “And here we go…Bird ‘The Mark’ Ridfych versus SNAFU. Ridfych and SNAFU lock up in the middle.” SNAFU Russian Leg Sweeps Ridfych and takes him off his feet. Both men slug it out mid-ring with forearms. Ridfych wins the exchange. He comes off the ropes and runs into a back elbow by SNAFU. Fireman’s carry by SNAFU, Ridfych slides out and takes SNAFU down. He gets an ankle lock! SNAFU grabs the ropes and the referee calls for the break. Ridfych charges but SNAFU catches him with a kick. Dragon screw takes Ridfych to the ground. SNAFU locks in the figure four. Ridfych fights his way to the ropes and the referee again calls for the break. SNAFU breaks on the 4 count.

A pair of leg trips by SNAFU. He covers and Ridfych kicks him off. SNAFU with a roll up. 1…2…Ridfych reverses and covers. 1…2…SNAFU kicks out. Ridfych catches SNAFU with a boot and a high knee strike. He goes for the dragon suplex but SNAFU drops down and rolls him up. 1…2…kickout. SNAFU up and goes behind. Standing switch by Ridfych. He tries the dragon suplex again. SNAFU drops down but Ridfych kicks him in the back. Crucifix by Ridfych. He covers. 1…2…no. Another kickout by the Television champion. Ridfych throws a stiff right hand. Crowd: “FASTBALL!” And another… Crowd: “FASTBALL!” And another… Crowd: “FASTBALL!” Right hook… Crowd: “SLIDER!” And then winds up and decks SNAFU… Crowd: “F-FFFFFASTBALL!” Cover. SNAFU makes the ropes.

Both men to their feet and again they exchange forearms. SNAFU with a series of open-hand slaps, he comes off the ropes into a STIFF right hand by Ridfych. Crowd: “FASTBALL!” Ridfych goes to the ropes but SNAFU catches him with an elbow and stops him in his tracks. Dawn McGill slides him a chair. Triple Jump Moonsault on the way! Chair…top rope…moonsault lands. Cover…1…2…shoulder up. Cobra Clutch by SNAFU. Ridfych reaches for the ropes but SNAFU reels him back. SNAFU releases and hits a German Suplex! 1…2…no! Back to the Cobra Clutch, now with added grapevine action! SNAFU is able to make it to the ropes. The referee makes SNAFU break the hold. Roll up by the Television champion. 1…2…no! Tiger suplex by SNAFU. He covers…1…2…kick out. SNAFU goes to the top, Ridfych crotches him! Ridfych is up this time, BACK SUPERPLEX!!! 1…2…no! Ridfych again with the pin! 1…2…NO!!! Rights by Ridfych but now SNAFU will not go down.

SNAFU clotheslines Ridfych. SNAFU opens up the chair…Ridfych is thrown into the ropes…Drop Toe Hold onto the open chair! SNAFU gets up. They lockup. SNAFU sends Ridfych to the corner of the ring. Ridfych bounces SNAFU off the ropes and hits him with a jumping clothesline. SNAFU is back on his feet. Indian deathlock applied by Ridfych. The referee checks on SNAFU…SNAFU escapes. SNAFU to ringside. Ridfych follows and takes SNAFU down with a knee. Ridfych takes SNAFU off his feet a second time with a short-arm clothesline. Ridfych picks up SNAFU and delivers a bone crunching shoulderbreaker. Ridfych hits a headlock takedown and stomps away at SNAFU. Ridfych back to the ring. SNAFU and McGill confer. SNAFU back in and he punches Ridfych. SNAFU gets a side headlock…DDT! SNAFU climbs to his feet. McGill slides another chair in. SNAFU turns and blasts Ridfych with the chair… SNAFU climbs up top…Shooting Star Press onto the chair! SNAFU hooks Ridfych into a suplex position. Hooks the leg..Fisherman Suplex on the chair!! Now SNAFU with the chair…Arabian Facebuster! Cover…1 …2 …3.

WINNER AND STILL PCW TELEVISION CHAMPION: SNAFU in 14:11

Suave: “BIG WIN FOR SNAFU AND HE DEFENDS THE PCW TELEVISION CHAMPIONSHIP! WE’LL BE BACK NEXT WEEK WITH MORE PCW ACTION. I’M JOHNNY SUAVE AND HAVE A GOOD NIGHT!”

———————–

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Filed under: Average Joe, Barack Obama, Blogs- Pro Wrestling, Independents, Joe the Plumber, Paul Heyman, Politics, Pro Wrestling, Small Town America, Third Party, democrats, joe six pack, political satire, political wrestling, red state, republicans, wordpress political blogs | Tagged: Anita Dunn, ECW, Extreme Championship Wrestling, Ring of Honor, ROH, TNA, World Wrestling Entertainment, WWE | Leave a Comment »

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