4/28- BCEW Review

BCEW OVERVIEW (for the uninitiated)

Last week at BCEW Keystone State Khaos- Moment of Truth, the Hillary Clinton-Barack Obama Progressive Alliance feud reached a new level in blood and brutality as Hillary-backed Triple R defeated ‘The New Rookie Sensation’ O’Beck Bahama. In the match, Triple R, allied with Big Oil of the American Patriots in Rush Limbaugh’s unholy Chaotic Alliance of Convenience (CAC), overwhelmed the newcomer to stake his claim to a title shot against BCEW champion Starz N. Stripes.

BCEW Champion Starz N. Stripes (American Patriots) exacted a little revenge of his own when he face-planted rival Big Oil (American Patriots), who had laid him out on 4/14’s BCEW Extreme Political TV, through a table.

BCEW Women’s Champion Opal Winfree (Progressive Alliance) delivered a devastating top rope DDT to Kathryn Randall Collins (Progressive Alliance) and retained her title.

BCEW also celebrated Earth Day in our own unique way…

THE GREEN WORLD ORDER CELEBRATES EARTH DAY

Peta from PETA comes out and kicks Suave and the life-size cardboard cut-out of Danica out of the ring. She brings out her brother Peter (no relation to GreenPete) from PETA and the rest of the Green World Order (GreenPete, Extreme Vegan Brock Cole Lee, and PeaceNick) to celebrate Earth Day. After Peta rips into the crowd for their wasteful, irresponsible ways, BCEW employee Skank Mitchell walks to the ring. Skank wants to celebrate ‘Moon’ Day. Peta: “Moon Day? What the hell is Moon Day?” Skank tells her he’ll show her. Then he climbs into the ring, turns his back to the GWO, and then pulls down his pants. Crowd: “BCEW!…BCEW!” Suave: “Well? You could say that the accumulation of cellulite and pimples on his ass is an accurate reflection of the surface of the moon.”

This week on BCEW Extreme Political TV, where will the Barack-Hillary go next? BCEW Television Champion ‘No Frills’ Chris Escondido defends his title in a three-way dance against ‘Insanely Smelling Luchador’ Halitosis (Independent) and Big Oil (American Patriots).

————–

BCEW TITLEHOLDERS:

BCEW WORLD CHAMPION: Starz N. Stripes (American Patriots)
CONTENDERS:
#1- O’Beck Bahama (Progressive Alliance)
#2- Triple R (Progressive Alliance)

BCEW WOMEN’S CHAMPION: Opal Winfree (Progressive Alliance)
CONTENDERS:
#1- Kathryn Randall Collins (Progressive Alliance)
#2- ‘BCEW Extreme Pizza Delivery Girl’ Tessa Martin (Independent)

BCEW TELEVISION CHAMPION: ‘No Frills’ Chris Escondido (Independent)
CONTENDERS:
#1- Big Oil (American Patriots)
#2- Halitosis (Independent)

BCEW TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS: A. Tom Bomb and Hy Drogen Bomb (American Patriots)
CONTENDERS:
#1- The Green World Order- GreenPete and Extreme Vegan Brock Cole Lee (Independent)
#2- Schett Brothers- Jack Schett and Bull Schett (Progressive Alliance)