4/29-PCW Extreme Political TV: Al Franken, Nancy Pelosi Gloat About Barbed Wire Win and Arlen Specter

American Trucker and Average Joe (American Heartland Coalition) vs. Mr. Jaundice and Captain Nausea (Island of Misfit Wrestlers)/Big Monster Wahlie (Domination Inc.) vs. Snott Flemmstein (Island of Misfit Wrestlers)/#1 Contender’s Match for the PCW Women’s Title

4/29-PCW EXTREME POLITICAL TV from the Palace of Political Extreme- PCW Hall in Archbold, Ohio
HOSTS: Johnny Suave and his life size cardboard cut-out of Shania Twain

Crowd: “PCW…PCW…PCW!” Suave: “HELLO AND WELCOME TO PCW EXTREME POLITICAL TV! I’M JOHNNY SUAVE. THIS HOT PIECE OF CARDBOARD IS SHANIA TWAIN! THE WRESTLING WORD IS STILL BUZZING OVER WHAT TOOK PLACE SUNDAY NIGHT ON PCW ON P-SPAN. IF YOU MISSED IT, HERE’S WHAT HAPPENED…”

REPLAY FROM 4/26 PCW ON P-SPAN: The aftermath of the Steel Cage Grudge Match:Janeane Garofalo (Progressive Alliance) vs.PCW Women’s Champion ‘Extreme Pizza Delivery Girl’ Tessa Martin
Suave: “TESSA MARTIN GETS THE WIN AND…NOW WHAT? DICK CHENEY WANTS TO SHAKE TESSA’S HAND NOW? IS HE NUTS?” Dick thrusts his hand out to Tessa. Tessa looks around the crowd and gauges their response. Dick: “Shake my f***ing hand!” Tessa’s eyes widen. Then she Pizza Cutters Dick. The crowd explodes. Suave: “PIZZA CUTTER! PIZZA CUTTER! TESSA JUST PIZZA CUTTER’D DICK…NOW SHE’S BEING ATTACKED BY W’S IMAGE REHAB AND TRUTH SQUAD!” Card, Perino, Fleisher, and Rove beat down Tessa. ‘The Queen of Political Extreme’ Ann Coulter and former PCW Women’s Champion Hallie Burton enter the cage. Coulter grabs Garofalo and handcuffs her to the side of the cage. Suave: “WHAT THE HELL IS THIS? THE QUEEN OF POLITICAL EXTREME ANN COULTER HAS HANDCUFFED JANEANE GAROFALO TO THE CAGE. AND NOW, ARI FLEISCHER AND ANDREW CARD HAVE BROUGHT IN A BARREL FULL OF WATER? AND A BOARD? Oh…no.” Burton pulls Tessa up and drapes her on the board. Perino handcuffs Tessa’s arms behind her back around the board and Fleischer and Card lower her into the water. Suave: “NO! STOP THEM! THAT’S NOT RIGHT!” Lamb: “My God. Are they actually…waterboarding her?” Suave: “WHAT THE HELL DOES IT LOOK LIKE, BRIAN?” Suave jumps on top of the announcer’s table. Suave: “DICK, THIS IS WRONG! STOP IT!” Dick sneers at Suave and has a microphone.

Dick: “Of course you would think that way, Suave. Because you’re weak. You all are weak! When you face an enemy, do you worry about piddly little minute details such as the Geneva Convention?” Coulter takes a steel chair and blasts Garofalo with it. Suave: “HOLY CRAP! SHE’S KNOCKED OUT!” Dick: “F*** no! You do what you have to do to win. To project strength and to deter those who would harm you.” Pelosi, Harry Reid, and Steny Hoyer run to the ring. Dick flips them off. Suave: “THIS IS JUST WRONG!” The board is pulled out of the barrel of water and laid on the canvas. Cheney, Card, Rove, Perino, etal then exit the cage. Dick again flips off Pelosi etal as they smugly walk to the back. Nurse Nellie and the PCW Clean Up Crew quickly enter the ring and attend to Garofalo and Tessa.

Suave: “So the question is-” Female voice: “HOLD ON! HOLD ON JUST A MINUTE!” Nancy Pelosi walks out and heads towards the ring with a grinning Al Franken. Suave: “THERE’S AL FRANKEN WHO WON THAT BRUTAL HARDCORE BARBED WIRE DEATHMATCH OVER NORM COLEMAN SUNDAY NIGHT.” Franken is bandaged up from the match. Pelosi and Franken enter the ring. Pelosi: Hold on just a moment! Now, before I get to Dick Cheney and waterboarding, can we all give it up for Al Franken?” Polite applause. Pelosi: “Didn’t he do a great job in defeating once and for all- Norm Coleman?” More polite applause. Pelosi: “I think so. With Al Franken winning Sunday night and the news today that longtime stalwart of the American Patriots, Arlen Specter finally got tired of Rush Limbaugh running the show and joined the Progressive Alliance, it’s been a great week for the Progressive Alliance.”

Dick Cheney and the rest of W’s Image Rehab and Truth Squad- “The Mastermind” Karl Rove, Dana Perino, Ari Fleischer, and Andrew Card, appear and they head to the ring. Twenty-five percent of the audience cheers. The rest boo. They climb into the ring. Rove keeps pointing to his temple to make sure everyone knows he’s a friggin’ genius. Cheney: “Oh boo-f***-ing hoo. Where is he?” Pelosi: “Where is who?” Cheney: “Where is that two-timing ***** ******* traitor Arlen Specter? If you see him, tell him I’ve got a ticket for him.” Pelosi: “A ticket?” Cheney: “That’s right. A ticket. A one way ticket to what I like to call- Club Gitmo.” The lights shine on the side of PCW Hall and illuminate a pool of water and a board on the side to lower someone in. More boos roll in. Cheney: “Just like Janeane Garofalo found out last week. Just like ‘Extreme Pizza Delivery Girl’ Tessa Martin found out last week. Just like Arlen Specter is going to find out THIS week.” Cheney pauses for more boos. Cheney: “If you’re not with us, you’re against us. Arlen Specter…where ever you’re hiding…if you can’t stand the heat…we’ll, don’t worry…I’VE got something that’ll cool you right off.” Cheney points to the waterboarding device inside ‘Club Gitmo.’

Pelosi: “I think that’s terrible! They should lock you up, Dick Cheney, for waterboarding Tessa Martin last week.” Cheney: “Nancy, with all due respect, you’ve known that we were going to use waterboarding for quite a long time.” Pelosi: W-what? That’s simply not true. I’ve never been a part of any briefing where the subject of waterboarding-”

TAPE FROM MEETING OF THE PCW COMPETITION COMMITTEE A FEW MONTHS BACK
Pelosi, Harry Reid, and Steny Hoyer representing the Progressive Alliance, and Mitch McConnell and John Boehner of the American Patriots sit at a table with Cheney, Rove, and Don Rumsfeld. Pelosi: “So…the consensus is that because PCW has already allowed chloroform, jumper cables, tasers, cattle prods, that we’re going to allow powerful drugs that are transmitted by touch that cause temporary paralysis?” Everyone murmurs yes. Pelosi: “Okay. Motion carried.” Cheney: “Nancy, any objection to the use of waterboarding in PCW events?” Pelosi: “That’s fine. Whatever. Next?

Pelosi’s jaw drops. Cheney: “Now, madame speaker. If you don’t mind, we need to engage in a man hunt for Mr. Specter.”

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Suave: “Well. That can’t be good. Last week on PCW Extreme Political TV, we had the successful debut of Movie Classic, who’ll be taking over the reins of the Island of Misfit Wrestlers group.

REPLAY: LAST WEEK’S PCW EXTREME POLITICAL TV:
ISLAND OF MISFIT WRESTLERS LOCKER ROOM
…A guy wearing sunglasses and a tacky sports coat walks in. MAN: “Look at this dressing room. I see dead people. Mama always said life was like a box of chocolates. You never know what you’re gonna get.” Jimmy: “Who are you?” MAN: “I’m Movie Classic. Listen to them. Children of the night. What music they make?” Snott: “What. Listen to children do what? What are you talking about?” DVD: “Really. Just leave us alone to our fate.” Dredd Pirate Dougie: “War’s over, man. Dr. Bill dropped the big one on us.” Movie Classic: “Over? Did you say “over”? Nothing is over until we decide it is! Was it over when the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor? Hell no!” Richard Headd: “Germans?” Dr. Rectum: “Shhhh, he’s rolling.” Movie Classic: “And it ain’t over now. ‘Cause when the goin’ gets tough…” A long pause follows. The Island of Misfit Wrestlers wait…and wait…and wait for him to finish the sentence. Movie Classic: “…the the tough get goin’! Who’s with me? Let’s go!”

THE END OF NEWT TRON BOMB (American Patriots) vs. SNAFU MATCH LAST WEEK:
Suave: “SNAFU sets the chair up for the Triple Jump Moonsault. WAIT A MINUTE! HOLY CRAP! JIMMY FROM SO CAL JUST PUSHED SNAFU OFF TH ROPES!” Movie Classic comes up to Dr. Bill. Movie Classic: “Say hello to my little friends!” Richard Headd, Snott Flemmstein, and Dredd Pirate Douggie tackle Dr. Bill.

Suave: “IT’S THE ISLAND OF MISFIT WRESTLERS! THEY’RE PUMMELING DR. BILL!” SNAFU is up and staggers towards the ring. Suave: “S.M. ART BOMB THROWS SNAFU BACK IN THE RING. N-BOMB STICK HIS BUTT IN HIS FACE. OOOOOHHHH! ICK! SILENT BUT DEADLY! SILENT BUT DEADLY! N-BOMB COVERS. ONE. TWO. THREE!”

WINNER: NEWT TRON BOMB

Suave: “Movie Classic leads the Island of Misfit Wrestlers to get their revenge on Dr. Bill for leading them to be slaughtered by Domination Inc. last Sunday. AND THEY’RE NOT DONE YET! THEY’VE SET UP A TABLE AND DRAPED DR. BILL ON IT. DVD TO THE TOP ROPE. HE JUMPS. HE MISSES! OW! ALL RIGHT, HERE’S DREDD PIRATE DOUGGIE. *CRUNCH* HOLY CRAP!” Dr. Bill is driven through the table. Another PCW chant starts up.

MATCH #1
MR. JAUNDICE and CAPTAIN NAUSEA w/Movie Classic (Island of Misfit Wrestlers)
vs. AVERAGE JOE and THE AMERICAN TRUCKER w/Tequila Sheila (American Heartland Coalition)
Suave: “This is the debut for Mr. Jaundice and Captain Nausea and they are…um…let’s say…color appropriate. Yellow and green is an interesting mix of colors.” The bell rings. Suave: “Jaundice starts with Average Joe.  Joe grabs a wristlock. Jaundice reverses it into an armbar. Joe counters into an armwringer. Jaundice with a takedown. Off the ropes, Jaundice runs into a monkeyflip. Captain Nausea in and hits a drop toehold on Joe. Jaundice with a senton off the ropes on Average Joe.” American Trucker runs in and dropkicks Captain Nausea and sends him outside.

Suave: “Jaundice whips Average Joe into the corner and tags in Captain Nausea. Neckbreaker by Nausea for two. He locks in a chinlock, but Average Joe elbows out. Nausea goes for a back suplex. American Trucker in the ring…he clips the legs. Average Joe falls on top of him for a cover. One…two…no. Jaundice makes the save! American Trucker charges into a back elbow. Jaundice off the top rope…and he runs right into a dropkick! Average Joe covers. One…two-shoulder up. Backdrop by Average Joe. He’s got Jaundice up…SPINEBUSTER! Average Joe covers. One, two, no! Jaundice kicks out. Average Joe gets backdropped to the apron. Captain Nausea elbows him to the floor. Double-team on American Trucker….DOUBLE TEAM SUPLEX! Cover…HERE COMES SNAFU!”

SNAFU slides in the ring with a steel folding chair. *CLANG* Suave: “HE JUST NAILED CAPTAIN NAUSEA! MOVIE CLASSIC IN THE RING. *CLANG* HOLY CRAP! SCHOOLBOY ROLL-UP ON JAUNDICE BY AMERICAN TRUCKER! ONE…TWO…THREE!”

WINNER: AMERICAN TRUCKER and AVERAGE JOE

Dr. Bill comes out and smirks. He nods approvingly and he and SNAFU walk to the back.

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COMMERCIAL TIME:
The E-Wrestling Magazine is the home for all the latest news on e-federations all across the country. Check out PCW and all the latest stories:
Chairman Martin Plans to Redirect Company Wednesday, 29 April 2009 (/)
Just Wrestling’s What Next? Tour: It Goes There Tuesday, 28 April 2009 (/)
Interview with Ron Meischker this Thursday Tuesday, 28 April 2009 (/)
4/26- PCW on P-SPAN: Coleman vs. Franken in Barbed Wire Deathmatch, Plus Women’s Cage Match Sunday, 26 April 2009 (/)
Dream Wrestling Plans DVD Release of 18 DWF Pay Per Views Sunday, 26 April 2009 (/)
2 new free poser shots Sunday, 26 April 2009 (/)
2 Posers by Eric for EWZine Release Sunday, 26 April 2009 (/)
Eight Random Roleplays 04.26.09 Sunday, 26 April 2009 (/)
SWF LIVE (Full Report) Sunday, 26 April 2009 (/)
Dreamwrestling.com Exclusive Web Show Airs! Saturday, 25 April 2009 (/)
4/25-PCW Extra: The Coleman/Franken Feud Saturday, 25 April 2009 (/)
All-Star Championship Wrestling 4/16/09 Report Friday, 24 April 2009 (/)
Dreamwrestling.com to Air Two Matches Sunday! Friday, 24 April 2009 (/)
The Big Shot 04.23.09 Thursday, 23 April 2009 (/)
BOB: Total Non-Action Wrestling iMPLOSION! #20 Results! Thursday, 23 April 2009 (/)

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Fed Wars.org – Fed Wars is an interfed promotion currently run by Ben Halkum. There are a number of e-feds already involved in this project.
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Suave: “Okay, we’re back on PCW Extreme Political TV. It looks like Dick Cheney and the W’s Image Rehab and Truth Squad are hot on the trail of Arlen Specter…”

BACKSTAGE
Cheney, Rove, Perino, Card, and Fleischer prowl the hallways looking for Specter.

Suave: “We’ll catch up with them a little later. One guy who’s easy to find is headed to the ring right now. The seven foot Weapon of Mass Destruction- Big Monster Wahlie!”

MATCH #2

‘The 7 Foot Tall Weapon of Mass Destruction’ BIG MONSTER WAHLIE w/Rough Justice: D.B. Ruff and Connor Justice (Domination Inc.)
vs. SNOTT FLEMMSTEIN w/Movie Classic (Island of Misfit Wrestlers)
Suave:
“It may just be me, but I just don’t see an upset taking place here.” Movie Classic takes a good look at Big Monster Wahlie. Movie Classic: “Man, I’d hate to take a bite outta you. You’re a cookie full of arsenic!” Big Monster growls and Movie Classic wisely evacuates the ring. Suave: “And there’s the bell. Flemmstein’s going for the stream of snot offense from his nose. Yeah…doesn’t work. Oooh. Big body slam by Big Monster. OW! He stomps away at Flemmstein who tries to reach the ropes…but Big Monster drags him right back to the middle. He pulls Flemmstein to his feet, spins him around and lifts him up…ELECTRIC CHAIR FACEBUSTER! HOLY CRAP! ONE…TWO…THREE.”

WINNER: ‘The 7 Foot Weapon of Mass Destruction’ BIG MONSTER WAHLIE

Suave: “Once again, that was quick. OH. HERE WE GO AGAIN…BIG MONSTER HAS FLEMMSTEIN UP AGAIN… OHHHHHHH ANOTHER ELECTRIC CHAIR FACEBUSTER! The referee tries to wave Big Monster off. Suave: “ELECTRIC CHAIR FACEBUSTER TO THE REFEREE! HOLY CRAP! ANOTHER ELECTRIC CHAIR FACEBUSTER TO FLEMMSTEIN!” ‘Sports Entertainment Genius’ Mr. McMann enters the ring. McMann: “Come on PCW. Is this the best you’ve got? Where’s O’Beck Bahama hiding this week? Where’s the great PCW Champion at? Domination Inc. is back on track. Now that I’ve disposed of the mole and all the dead weight slowing us down, Domination Inc. is poised to become THE force in Political Championship Wrestling.” Suave: “Mr. McMann feeling pretty good after Big Monster Wahlie disposes of Snott Flemmstein.”

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BACKSTAGE
Cheney, Rove, Card, Perino, and Fleischer continue to scour the dressing rooms looking for Arlen Specter.
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UPCOMING SHOWS:
PCW would like to highlight shows from other great e-federations who are out there. Check them out:

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UPCOMING EVENTS:
5/1- PCW Newsline
5/3- PCW on P-SPAN
5/6- PCW Extreme Political TV
5/8- PCW Newsline
5/10- PCW on P-SPAN
5/13- PCW Extreme Political TV
5/17- PCW on P-SPAN
5/20- PCW Extreme Political TV

5/22- PCW Newsline

NEXT MONTH:
6/7- PCW Loose Cannons Unleashed IV
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MAIN EVENT- #1 CONTENDER’S MATCH FOR THE PCW WOMEN’S TITLE
KATHRYN RANDALL COLLINS aka KRC w/Hillary Clinton and the Clinton Political Pitbulls-James Carville and Paul Begala (Progressive Alliance)
vs. HALLIE BURTON w/’The Mastermind’ Karl Rove (Extreme Neo-Con Alliance)
vs. MERCEDES w/Porsche Lexus and Rough Justice- D.B. Ruff and Connor Justice (Domination Inc.)
Suave: “Well, our main event is a three-way dance to become the new #1 contender for the PCW Women’s title.” The bell rings. Suave: “There’s the bell and…WAIT A MINUTE! THAT’S PCW WOMEN’S CHAMPIONS ‘EXTREME PIZZA DELIVERY GIRL’ TESSA MARTIN! *WHAP* HOLY CRAP! SHE JUST TOOK OUT HALLIE BURTON WITH HER OVERSIZED PIZZA BOX! *WHAP* DOWN GOES KARL ROVE! TESSA THROWS BURTON INTO THE RING…PIZZA CUTTER! PIZZA CUTTER! THE WOMEN’S CHAMPION SLIDES OUT OF THE RING AND IT’S GOING TO BE…KRC. SHE COVERS. ONE…TWO…THREE!”

HALLIE BURTON ELIMINATED

Suave: “WAIT! THE ‘EXTREME PIZZA DELIVERY GIRL’ ISN’T DONE YET. SHE’S BACK IN THE RING AND PULLS BURTON TO THE OUTSIDE APRON. SHE MOTIONS THE RING GUY TO GET OUT OF THE WAY. OH…NO…SHE’S NOT GOING TO…YES SHE IS…” Tessa Pizza Cutters Hallie Burton right through the table. Suave: “HOLY CRAP!” Tessa turns towards Rove who wisely vacates the ring area. Suave: “Tessa Martin is furious and she’s not going to stop until she gets her hands on Dick Cheney. HOLD ON! THAT’S KALEE JONES-THE ESKIMO QUEEN AND THE ALASKAN PITBULL SARAH PALIN! WHAT ARE THEY DOING OUT HERE?” Kalee hits the ring and Eskimo Piefaces KRC. Suave: “HOLY CRAP! The Eskimo Queen caught KRC totally by surprise. AGAIN! THIS TIME IT’S MERCEDES! PORSCHE LEXUS RUNS IN…ESKIMO PIEFACE! ROUGH JUSTICE! *THWACK* PALIN JUST DECAPITATED D.B. RUFF WITH HOCKEY STICK! HOLY FREAKIN’ CRAP! CARVILLE AND BEGALA IN THE RING. OWWWWWWW! PALIN JUST CRACKED HER HOCKEY STICK ON CARVILLE’S HEAD. IT’S TOTALLY OUT OF CONTROL NOW! DICK CHENEY HUNTING DOWN ARLEN SPECTER! KALEE JONES PISSED BECAUSE SHE WASN’T INCLUDED IN THE #1 CONTENDER’S MATCH. LOTS OF ISSUES OUTSTANDING. WE’LL SEE YOU SUNDAY NIGHT ON PCW ON P-SPAN!”

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Other political stories about:

Nancy Pelosi: The Daley Gator, Eat It or Wear It, McNorman’s Blog, Chronicler55, Joint Effort, DPGI, Sister Toldjah, CNN, Michelle Malkin, Firedog Lake, Wake Up America, The HIll, Lonely Conservative, Right Voices, Steny Hoyer,

Arlen Specter: CNN, National Review, Tim Hadachek’s Blog, Popeolitics, Firedog Lake, Gero’s Blog, Huff Post, Constitution Sentinel, Gawker, BackChannel Blog, Pushing Rope, Daley Gator, Huff Post, News from My Corner, Michelle Malkin, Wintery Knight Blog, Huff Post, Reason,

Sarah Palin: Mudflats,

4/29-PCW Extreme Political TV Preview

The Progressive Alliance will be basking in the glow of Al Franken’s big victory Sunday night on PCW on P-SPAN over Norm Coleman AND the news today that Arlen Specter has left the American Patriots to join the PA.

Movie Classic will bring out two new members of the PCW family, Mr. Jaundice and Captain Nausea to face the American Heartland Coalition’s Average Joe and American Trucker.

More fallout over Dick Cheney waterboarding PCW Women’s champion “Extreme Pizza Delivery Girl” Tessa Martin Sunday night.

Domination Inc.’s Seven foot Weapon of Mass Destruction Big Monster Wahlie takes on Snott Flemmstein from the Island of Misfit Wrestlers.

All this and a #1 contender’s match for the PCW Women’s title tonight on Political Championship Wrestling.

4/26-PCW on P-SPAN: Coleman vs. Franken in Hardcore Barbed Wire Deathmatch, Garofalo vs. ‘Extreme Pizza Delivery Girl’ in Cage Match

Green World Order (‘Extreme Vegan’ Brock Cole Lee and GreenPete) vs. Grizzly Adam and NRA (SarahPAC)/Non-title Grudge Match inside a steel cage: Janeane Garofalo (Progressive Alliance) vs. PCW Women’s Champion ‘Extreme Pizza Delivery Girl’ Tessa Martin (American Heartland Coalition)/Newt Tron Bomb (American Patriots) vs. PCW TV Champion ‘No Frills’ Chris Escondido (Progressive Alliance) for PCW TV title/Norm Coleman (American Patriots) vs. Al Franken (Progressive Alliance) in a Hardcore Barbed Wire Deathmatch.

4/26 PCW on P-SPAN results from Minneapolis, MN

Match #1: Grizzly Adam and NRA with ‘The Alaskan Pitbull’ Sarah Palin (SarahPAC) defeats ‘Extreme Vegan’ Brock Cole Lee and GreenPete with PeaceNick and Peta from PETA (Green World Order). PeaceNick attempted to chloroform NRA which brought Sarah Palin into the match. Palin broke her hockey stick over PeaceNick’s head. NRA put Brock Cole Lee in the Gun Rack to score the win.

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PCW Newsline: Gina Ramsey reviews the week’s transactions:

Incoming:
Movie Classic signed on with PCW and will manage the Island of Misfit Wrestlers.

Also coming in:
-Dr. Mysterio
-Mr. Jaundice
-Captain Nausea

All three will join Movie Classic in the Island of Misfit Wrestlers

Outgoing:
Halitosis- ‘The Luchador with the Insanely Foul Breath’ will be taking a leave to go overseas for a few months.

Also leaving PCW for awhile:
-Union Jac
-DLC
-The American Bikers: Little Paulie and Big Paulie

Moving:
NRA jumps from Politically Incorrect to join SarahPAC.

Also moving within PCW:
-Politically Incorrect (‘The Princess of Political Incorrectness’ Andrea Doria, Al Cahall, and Nic Koteen) has joined up with the American Heartland Coalition

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Match #2: ‘No Frills’ Chris Escondido with ‘Rahm-bo’ Rahm Emanuel (Progressive Alliance) retains the PCW Television Title over Newt Tron Bomb with S.M. Art Bomb, Hy Drogen Bomb, and A. Tom Bomb. Escondido broke out some new moves in this match including his new finisher- the Cattle Mutilation, that finished N-Bomb off at the fourteen minute mark.

Post match: Former Domination Inc. member Daisy Cutter-Bomb again comes out and seeks the Bomb’s forgiveness after saving H-Bomb from a Redneck 4-D deathblast…

Replay: 4/22-PCW Extreme Political TV- HY DROGEN BOMB and INCENDIARY BOMB w/S.M. Art Bomb (American Patriots) vs.’The Raving Rednecks’ LOCKE AND LOADE (SarahPAC)
Suave: “Meanwhile…LOADE’S GOT A SUNSET FLIP! One…Two…NO! Just barely kicked out. LOCKE’S IN THE RING! YESSSSS! REDNECK 4-D DEATH BOMB! COVER. ONE…TWO…IT’S DAISY CUTTER-BOMB! SHE’S IN THE RING AND…HOLY CRAP! SHE JUST KICKED THE CRAP OUT OF LOADE! HOLD ON! I-BOMB HAS LOCKE ON THE TOP ROPE…YES! BLUNT FORCE TRAUMA! BLUNT FORCE TRAUMA! COVER. ONE. TWO. THREE!

Again, the Bombs are hesitant to let her back in.

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UPCOMING SHOWS

PCW would like to highlight the other e-federations who are out there. Please feel free to check them out:

WTF Intensity
April 26, 2009 from 9pm to 11pm – WTF Headquarters
King of Xtreme
May 3, 2009 all day – XWW arena
WTF Xtreme
May 3, 2009 from 9pm to 11pm – Energy Solutions Arena

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The Titan Zone A social network about e-wrestling. Meet and get to know the Titans of the e-wrestling world!

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Match #3 Steel Cage Grudge Match:
Janeane Garofalo (Progressive Alliance) vs.
PCW Women’s Champion ‘Extreme Pizza Delivery Girl’ Tessa Martin
Suave: “Johnny Suave along with P-SPAN Brian Lamb in Minneapolis, Minnesota. Last week on PCW on P-SPAN, Nancy Pelosi attempted to interfere in Tessa’s match with Emily List of the Progressive Alliance and ended up getting smooshed by KRC and a steel folding chair. Last Wednesday on PCW Extreme Political TV, the feud went to another level.”

Replay 4/22-PCW Extreme Political TV: Nancy Pelosi and Janeane Garofalo
Pelosi: “Last week, that trailer trash redneck Andrea Doria and Politically Incorrect interfered with Emily List and Code Pink as they were trying to win the PCW Women’s Title. As a result, the extremists from the American Heartland Coalition won.” Garofalo: “Let’s be very honest about what this is about. It’s not about bashing the Progressive Alliance. The American Heartland Coalition doesn’t support PCW CEO Barack Obama because they’re straight up racists. They’re nothing more but a bunch of teabagging rednecks just like former CEO George W was.” Suave: “WOW! Where did THAT come from? She has a right to her opinion but come on, that was hate filled bile.” PCW Women’s Champion ‘Extreme Pizza Delivery Girl’ Tessa Martin comes out. Suave: “I wonder what the PCW Champion is going say about this.” Tessa looks at Garofolo and Pelosi distainfully. She mouths ‘you’re not worth it’ and leaves…

Suave: Later in the show, the situation escalated after W’s Image Rehab and Truth Squad attacked Garofalo backstage…

Daily Kos: “American Heartland Coalition. Get your asses out here right now! W’s flunkies! You, too.” Suave: “Whoa. He’s calling out both the A.H.C. and W’s Image Rehab and Truth Squad.” PCW Women’s Champion ‘Extreme Pizza Delivery Girl’ Tessa Martin leads out the American Heartland Coalition. ‘The Mastermind’ Karl Rove comes out with Andrew Card, Dana Perino, and Ari Fleischer. Daily Kos: “All right. You, Tessa Martin, are in co-hoots with Rove and his band of extremists.” Tessa: “You know, I’ve just about had enough of you and your whacked out friends. You’ve come out here the last two weeks and accused the American Heartland Coalition of things that are flat out lies. You guys make me sick. You can take your-” Suave: “THAT’S JANEANE GAROFALO! SHE JUST TACKLED TESSA MARTIN AND WE HAVE OURSELVES A CAT-FIIIIIIGHT! CAT-FIIIIIIIIIIIIGHT! ALL HELL’S BROKEN LOOSE! THE ANGRY LEFT WING BLOGGERS AND THE AMERICAN HEARTLAND COALITION ARE GOING AT IT!” PCW Security Director Dawn McGill comes in again to restore order.

Suave: “Garofalo already in the ring. Here comes the PCW Women’s champion ‘Extreme Pizza Delivery Girl’ Tessa Martin and she looks intense.” Tessa climbs inside the cage. Suave: “Garofalo walks up to her and they are nose to nose.” The bell rings. Lamb: “I must comment that these two ladies don’t seem to like each other.” Suave: “I think that’s an understatement Brian. They lock up in the middle of the ring. AND GAROFALO PUSHES TESSA DOWN!” Tessa jumps right back up and gets back in Garofalo’s face. Suave: “Tessa’s not backing down…AND SHE PUSHED GAROFALO DOWN!” Garofalo lands in her corner and bounces off the turnbuckle. Tessa gestures to her to ‘get up and come here.’ Suave: “As I said, Tessa looks incredibly intense and focused. Garofalo with a wild swing! Tessa ducks under. Kick to the mid-section. Suplex! Tessa pulls her back up. SHE SLINGS HER RIGHT INTO THE CAGE!” Garofalo bounces off the steel cage and right back to Tessa who slings her into the other side of the cage. Garofalo bounces off the steel cage and right back to Tessa. Suave: “AGAIN INTO THE SIDE OF THE CAGE WITH GAROFALO!” Garofalo bounces off the cage and collapses in a heap.

Dick Cheney, carrying a barbed wire covered baseball bat, ‘The Mastermind’ Karl Rove, Dana Perino, Andrew Card, and Ari Fleischer aka W’s Image Rehab and Truth Squad walk down to the ring. Suave: “What the hell are they doing here?” Tessa sees them and backs up. ‘The Mastermind’ Rove points to his temple to make sure everyone in the building knows he’s a freakin’ genius. Card produces a steel bolt cutter and snips off the lock to the cage. Cheney, Rove, etal then go inside. Suave: “THEY CUT THE LOCK OFF AND NOW THEY’RE INSIDE. WHAT’S GOING ON HERE?” Garofalo looks up and sees Dick. She immediately jumps up from the canvas and lunges at Cheney. *WHAP* Suave: “HOLY CRAP! GAROFALO CHARGED DICK AND HE JUST BUSTED HER WIDE OPEN WITH THAT BARBED WIRE BAT!” Garofalo on the canvas bleeding profusedly from the forehead. Suave: “WHAT? DICK’S MOTIONING TO TESSA TO PIN GAROFALO?” Tessa bends down to check on her. She uses her shirt to wipe off some of the blood. Suave: “SHE’S NOT GOING ALONG WITH THIS. THE PCW WOMEN’S CHAMPION IS ACTUALLY TRYING TO HELP GAROFALO. SHE’S TRYING TO REVIVE HER.”

Garofalo revives, sees Tessa, and kicks her across the ring. Suave: “WAIT A MINUTE. SHE WAS ONLY TRYING TO H-…TESSA’S PISSED. Kick to the mid-section. PIZZA CUTTER! PIZZA CUTTER! COVER. ONE…TWO…THREE! THAT’S IT!”

Winner: ‘Extreme Pizza Delivery Girl’ Tessa Martin

Suave: “TESSA MARTIN GETS THE WIN AND…NOW WHAT? DICK CHENEY WANTS TO SHAKE TESSA’S HAND NOW? IS HE NUTS?” Dick thrusts his hand out to Tessa. Tessa looks around the crowd and gauges their response. Dick: “Shake my f***ing hand!” Tessa’s eyes widen. Then she Pizza Cutters Dick. The crowd explodes. Suave: “PIZZA CUTTER! PIZZA CUTTER! TESSA JUST PIZZA CUTTER’D DICK…NOW SHE’S BEING ATTACKED BY W’S IMAGE REHAB AND TRUTH SQUAD!” Card, Perino, Fleisher, and Rove beat down Tessa. ‘The Queen of Political Extreme’ Ann Coulter and former PCW Women’s Champion Hallie Burton enter the cage. Coulter grabs Garofalo and handcuffs her to the side of the cage. Suave: “WHAT THE HELL IS THIS? THE QUEEN OF POLITICAL EXTREME ANN COULTER HAS HANDCUFFED JANEANE GAROFALO TO THE CAGE. AND NOW, ARI FLEISCHER AND ANDREW CARD HAVE BROUGHT IN A BARREL FULL OF WATER? AND A BOARD? Oh…no.” Burton pulls Tessa up and drapes her on the board. Perino handcuffs Tessa’s arms behind her back around the board and Fleischer and Card lower her into the water. Suave: “NO! STOP THEM! THAT’S NOT RIGHT!” Lamb: “My God. Are they actually…waterboarding her?” Suave: “WHAT THE HELL DOES IT LOOK LIKE, BRIAN?” Suave jumps on top of the announcer’s table. Suave: “DICK, THIS IS WRONG! STOP IT!” Dick sneers at Suave and has a microphone.

Dick: “Of course you would think that way, Suave. Because you’re weak. You all are weak! When you face an enemy, do you worry about piddly little minute details such as the Geneva Convention?” Coulter takes a steel chair and blasts Garofalo with it. Suave: “HOLY CRAP! SHE’S KNOCKED OUT!” Dick: “F*** no! You do what you have to do to win. To project strength and to deter those who would harm you.” Pelosi, Harry Reid, and Steny Hoyer run to the ring. Dick flips them off. Suave: “THIS IS JUST WRONG!” The board is pulled out of the barrel of water and laid on the canvas. Cheney, Card, Rove, Perino, etal then exit the cage. Dick again flips off Pelosi etal as they smugly walk to the back. Nurse Nellie and the PCW Clean Up Crew quickly enter the ring and attend to Garofalo and Tessa.

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The E-Wrestling Magazine is the home for all the latest news on e-federations all across the country. Check out the latest stories:

Eight Random Roleplays 04.26.09 Sunday, 26 April 2009 (/)
SWF LIVE (Full Report) Sunday, 26 April 2009 (/)
Dreamwrestling.com Exclusive Web Show Airs! Saturday, 25 April 2009 (/)
4/25-PCW Extra: The Coleman/Franken Feud Saturday, 25 April 2009 (/)
All-Star Championship Wrestling 4/16/09 Report Friday, 24 April 2009 (/)
Dreamwrestling.com to Air Two Matches Sunday! Friday, 24 April 2009 (/)
The Big Shot 04.23.09 Thursday, 23 April 2009 (/)
BOB: Total Non-Action Wrestling iMPLOSION! #20 Results! Thursday, 23 April 2009 (/)
The E-Wrestling Rumor Mill #18 Thursday, 23 April 2009 (/)
4/22-PCW Extreme Political TV: Nancy Pelosi, Janeane Garofalo Confront the American Heartlanders Wednesday, 22 April 2009 (/)
Final Judgment 29th April Wednesday, 22 April 2009 (/)
Just Wrestling: The Silver Lining Monday, 20 April 2009 (/)
Dream Wrestling Talent Names Leaked Monday, 20 April 2009 (/)
Seven Random Roleplays 04.19.09 Monday, 20 April 2009 (/)
THE HYPE Monday, 20 April 2009 (/)

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Fed Wars.org – Fed Wars is an interfed promotion currently run by Ben Halkum. There are a number of e-feds already involved in this project.

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E-Wrestling Torch- E-fed television, pay-per-view, and classic show reviews!

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UPCOMING EVENTS:
4/29- PCW Extreme Political TV
5/1- PCW Newsline
5/3- PCW on P-SPAN
5/6- PCW Extreme Political TV
5/8- PCW Newsline
5/10- PCW on P-SPAN
5/13- PCW Extreme Political TV

6/7- PCW Loose Cannons Unleashed IV

———————

Match #4-Hardcore Barbed Wire Deathmatch:
NORM COLEMAN w/ ‘Rahm-bo’ Rahm Emanuel (American Patriots)

vs. AL FRANKEN w/ Eric Cantor (Progressive Alliance)
Suave: “If you want a recap on how the Franken/Coleman situation came to be, check out yesterday’s PCW Extra with Gina Ramsey for the low-down on this highly volitile feud.” Lamb: “It has been quite extradinary to say the least. We’ve never seen anything like it before and may never see anything like it again.” Suave: “Very true, Brian. Very true. Both men are in the ring and they’re already chirping back and forth at each other. A quick update on Janeane Garofalo and PCW Women’s Champion ‘Extreme Pizza Delivery Girl’ Tessa Martin. Both have been taken to the hospital but it looks like they’re going to okay. I will say this, we’ve seen some extradinary things take place here in PCW. We’ve seen chloroform, hypnosis, tasers, extreme flatulence, weaponry of all sorts, jumper cables, and a powerful drug transmitted by human touch that causes temporary paralysis in the recipient. As extreme as these finishers may seem, we’ve never seen waterboarding used here in PCW. It’ll be interesting to see how this shakes out in the next few weeks.”

The bell rings. Suave: “And there’s the bell. COLEMAN CHARGES! OH! FRANKEN WHIPS HIM INTO THE BARBED WIRE ROPES!” Coleman’s face contorts with pain. Lamb: “Johnny, that seemed almost like a desperation move on Coleman’s part.” Suave: “I agree, Brian. It seems Coleman is incredulous that he’s in this situation in the first place. He’s unestimated Franken from the beginning and now I believe desperation has set in.” Franken overpowers Coleman and pounds away on him. Rahm Emanuel pulls out a metal ladder and throws it in the middle of the ring. Franken sets up the ladder behind Coleman. Suave: “Franken going for a spear…GOT IT!” Coleman flies backfirst into the ladder! Franken gets the ladder and sets it up in the middle of the ring. Suave: “Franken’s going to try to put Coleman away quickly…WAIT! IT’S TEXAS SENATOR JOHN CORNYN!” Cornyn pushes the ladder over with Franken on it. Suave: “HOLY CRAP! FRANKEN HIT THE BARBED WIRE ROPES CHEST FIRST! RAHM EMANUEL IN THE RING. F-BOMB ON CORNYN! EMANUEL GRABS COLEMAN! F-BOMB! EMANUEL DROPS A PAIR OF F-BOMBS AND HELPS FRANKEN OFF THE ROPES!”

Eric Cantor digs under the ring and produces a barbed wire covered board. Suave: “Franken covers. One…two… *WHAP* CANTOR BREAKS THE COUNT! AND HE JUST PORCUPINED FRANKEN WITH THAT BARBED WIRE COVERED BOARD…THERE’S EMANUEL AGAIN! CANTOR SWINGS AND MISSES. F-BOMB! F-BOMB!” Emanuel grabs the barbed wire board and grinds Cantor’s face into it. Cantor screams in pain! Suave: “Holy crap! Whoa. Cantor’s face is a freakin’ mess.” Nurse Nellie and the PCW Clean Up Crew arrive and help Cantor to the back. Lamb: “I think Coleman’s fired all his weapons now.” Suave: “And now, Franken has the barbedwire bat. Well, this can’t be good for Coleman.” Franken swings and nails the crotch of Coleman. Lamb: “Yes. I see what you mean. May I?” Suave: “Certainly.” Lamb: “Holy crap!” Suave: “That was pretty good.”

Emanuel is back underneath the ring and he pulls out a 2×4 with barbed wire wrapped around it. Emanuel lights the 2×4 on fire! Suave: “Okay, that’s definitely not good for Coleman.” Franken swings and nails Coleman with the board! Suave: “HOLY CRAP! Coleman’s on fire! EMTs rush in and put the fire out. Franken rolls Coleman over. Suave: “ONE…TWO…THREE!”

WINNER: AL FRANKEN

Suave: “HOLY CRAP! I THINK WE JUST ABOUT SAW EVERYTHING TONIGHT! WEDNESDAY NIGHT- PCW EXTREME POLITICAL TV. WE’LL START SORTING ALL THIS OUT AND LOOK FORWARD TOWARDS JUNE 7TH AND PCW’S LOOSE CANNONS UNLEASHED 5!”

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Other Political stories:

Franken/Coleman: The Zoo, The Swamp, The Bruce Blog, Talking Points Memo, Norweigianity, The Week, Random Cowboy, Wall Street Journal, Minnesota Daily, The Confluence, Minnesota Independent, Congress Matters, Huff Post, Daily Kos, Right Of Course, Air America, My DD, Media Matters,

R’s and D’s: Eat It or Wear It, Lew Rockwell, Fort Liberty, CQ Politics, Josh Anderson, Cathie from Canada, CNN, Pirate’s Cove, Brenda Bowers, Gawker, 538.com, Hysterical Raisins, Mudflats, Va. Democrat, The Rush Report, Va. Conservative, Leaning to the Left, Rock the Vote,

Political Championship Wrestling at Facebook, Twitter

Come follow or befriend our merry band of political pirates.

PCW at Facebook

PCW at Twitter

4/25-PCW Extra: The Coleman/Franken Feud

“Gina Ramsey here. The Franken/Coleman feud has at times dominated the landscape at Political Championship Wrestling over the past six months. The feud really didn’t begin until October when they met for the first time. But it didn’t really take off until PCW Extreme Election Night 2008 in November. Here’s a look back at the feud from the beginning….

 

 
NORM COLEMAN (American Patriots) vs. AL FRANKEN (Progressive Alliance) from 10/7/08 PCW Extreme Political TV
Suave notes that Franken is the rookie here going up against an experience veteran in Coleman. Arianna Huffington is out hanging around Franken’s corner. She distracts Coleman and Franken takes advantage. Franken shoulder blocks him down and then chokes Coleman with his robe. Franken sets Coleman in the corner and then chokes him out with his boot. Whip off the ropes and Franken hits a leg whip. Huffington slides a chair in. Chairshot by Franken and then an arm bar. Knee by Coleman followed by a snap mare and back to the arm. Coleman finally escapes and slides out of the ring.

John McCain, leader of the American Patriots, now ringside and confers with Coleman. Back in the ring, he runs right into a clothesline. Franken follows with a dropkick. Kicks to the leg. Kicks to the back. Snap mare. Another kick to the back. Franken covers for 2. McCain in to break the count. Chairshot by McCain changes the momentum. Huffington on the ring apron and screaming at McCain. Coleman cranks on Franken’s knee and works into the reverse Indian deathlock. Barack Obama now down at the ring. Coleman rolls the Indian deathlock into a pinning combo. Obama in and pulls Coleman off. Franken to his feet. Shoulder ram by Coleman. Chops, rights, and uppercuts. Coleman rocks Franken. Wristlock and a twisting takedown. Coleman wrenches the wrist backwards and then stomps on the elbow. Coleman rolls into a cross arm breaker for one. Franken kicks his way out.

The crowd chants ‘PCW.’ Rights to Coleman. Cross face shots. Body kick by Coleman and back to the wristlock. Coleman adjusts to a hammerlock and works the other arm. Franken rolled into a pinning position for 2. Again, Obama breaks the count. Franken to his feet into a shoulder block by Coleman. Suplex try by Coleman countered by Franken. Coleman thrown out of the ring. Franken to the apron. Flying elbow drop from the ring. Suave: “HOLY CRAP!” Arianna Huffington sets a table up and Obama puts Coleman on it. McCain runs around the ring. Arianna latches on to him and holds on for dear life. Franken to the top. Sarah Palin hits the ring again with her hockey stick and whacks Franken in the back. Franken falls and hits hard on the floor. Joe Biden now to the ring. Obama and McCain get into it. Biden climbs up to the top rope. Palin starts towards him but Arianna gets in between her and Biden. Biden leaps and puts Coleman through the table. Suave: “HOLY CRAP!” Crowd: “PCW…PCW!” Biden rolls Coleman back into the ring. Then he rolls Franken back into the ring. Arianna and Palin rolls around on the ring canvas. Suave: “CAT-FIGHT! CAT-FIGHT!” Franken crawls over and covers Coleman. 1…2…3.

WINNER: AL FRANKEN (Progressive Alliance)

Suave: “WOW! Didn’t expect that. Al Franken proved to be a much tougher opponent than I originally thought he’d be. So far, not a good night for the American Patriots.

McCain looks extremely agitated at losing the match. He stalks to the back with Palin a step behind him.

———-

From 11/7 PCW EXTREME ELECTION NIGHT 2008:

Franken and Coleman reach the ring. Suave: “If the last match was a war, I hate to see how this one turns out. Both men don’t like each other. Is Coleman’s vast political experience enough to hold off Franken? Can Franken pull off a huge win and add to what has already been a huge night for the Progressive Alliance. And will we see Sarah Palin again in this match? We will find out in just a…SOMEONE’S RUNNING TO THE RING. WHO IS THAT? THAT’S DEAN BARKLEY THE INDEPENDENT. AND HE CAUGHT BOTH FRANKEN AND COLEMAN COMPLETELY BY SURPRISE. THERE’S A REF IN THE RING…HE’S CALLING FOR THE BELL!”

MATCH #5 Minnesota Street Brawl
AL FRANKEN (Progressive Alliance)
vs. NORM COLEMAN (American Patriots)
vs. DEAN BARKLEY (Independent)

Suave: “IT’S NOW A THREE WAY MINNESOTA STREET BRAWL!” Barkley starts the match with a back elbow smash to Franken. Then hard right hands to Coleman’s face. Coleman back into the corner. Barkley blatantly chokes him. Franken clobbers Barkley from behind. Coleman wisely ducks out to the outside to catch his breath. Franken throws Barkley out of the ring and then Coleman slams him into the ringpost. Coleman stomps and kicks Barkley. Barkley gouges him in the eyes. Franken, now out of the ring, throws Coleman into the ring steps and then clotheslines him over the steel barricade into the crowd. Crowd: “PCW…PCW…PCW!” They brawl in the crowd. Barkley comes up from behind and plants a steel folding chair over Franken’s head. Crowd: “PCW…PCW…PCW!”Coleman tries to go back towards the ring. He rams Barkley into the steel barricade, jumps the barricade, and then slingshots Barkley over the barricade into the ringpost. Coleman went up top and took too long. Franken grabs the ropes and crotches Coleman. He falls back in the ring. Franken hits a leg drop from the second ropes and then bites Coleman’s forehead. Suave: “HOLY CRAP!” The fans again cheer. Coleman reverses a whip then hits a pumphandle slam. Barkley hits a low, low blow on Franken. Franken somehow gets back up and thumbs Barkley in the eye. Coleman rams Franken shoulder-first into the corner ring post. Coleman rolls up Barkley from behind and hooks the tights. 1…2…3.

DEAN BARKLEY ELIMINATED

Suave: “IT’S DOWN TO COLEMAN AGAINST FRANKEN!” Coleman drags Franken out of the ring and slams him into the guardrail. Franken counters, blocks a suplex, and drapes Coleman across the guardrail. Franken’s spin kick from the ring apron misses. Coleman moves out of the way and Franken crashes right-knee-first into the rail. Quick chair shots in succession leave Franken dazed and wondering what hit him. Back suplex by Coleman. Suave: “WAIT A MINUTE! HERE COMES SARAH PALIN! SHE SWINGS THE HOCKEY STICK…MISSES FRANKEN AND HITS COLEMAN!” Palin winks. Suave: “THAT’S NOT SARAH PALIN! IT’S TINA FEY FROM SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE AGAIN! HERE’S COMES THE REAL PALIN!” Sarah Palin runs in and tackles Fey. They roll around on the floor. Suave: “CATFIGHT! CATFIGHT!”

Franken nails Coleman with a road sign. He next pulls out a cheese grater and rubs it across Coleman’s forehead. Suave: “CHEESE GRATER! CHEESE GRATER! COLEMAN IS BADLY BUSTED OPEN!” Franken pulls a ladder from underneath the ring and clocks Coleman with it. Franken grabs a garbage can and drop toe holds Coleman onto it. Cover. Two count. Coleman staggers back up and Franken knocks him right back out with a steel chair. Crowd: “HOLY S@#$#… HOLY S@#$#.” Franken puts Coleman on top of the ladder and climbs up on the corner turnbuckle. Franken leaps off the turnbuckle and crushes Coleman on the metal ladder. Crowd: “HOLY S@#$#… HOLY S@#$#.” Franken covers. 1…2…3.

WINNER: AL FRANKEN (Progressive Alliance)

Suave: “THE PROGRESSIVE ALLIANCE SCORES ANOTHER VICTORY HERE IN AN EXTREME HARDCORE POLITICAL MATCH! WOW! It’s now 4 for the Progressive Alliance, 1 for the independents, and 0 for the American Patriots.”

——————

11/6/09 PCW NEWSLINE:
Tuesday night at PCW Extreme Election Night 2008, Norm Coleman and Al Franken went through an intense hardcore war…

…Franken pulls a ladder from underneath the ring and clock Coleman with it. Franken grabs a garbage can and drops toe holds Coleman onto it. Cover. Two count. Coleman staggers back up and Franken knocks him right back out with a steel chair. Crowd: “HOLY S@#$#… HOLY S@#$#.” Franken puts Coleman on top of the ladder and climbs up on the corner turnbuckle. Franken leaps off the turnbuckle and crushes Coleman on the metal ladder. Crowd: “HOLY S@#$#… HOLY S@#$#.” Franken covers. 1…2…3.

The issue was decided when Franken pinned Coleman…or was it?

After Extreme Election Night ended, this took place…

PARKING LOT- HACK’S RUSTY NAIL SALOON
Al Franken opens up his car door. He starts to get into his car when Norm Coleman slams the door shut on Franken’s left leg. Coleman opens the car door and pulls Franken out. Franken to the ground. Coleman kicks at Franken’s left leg. He kneels down and starts swinging away. Coleman drags Franken up and whips him headfirst into the driver’s side window. Franken staggers back and his left leg gives out. Coleman again pulls him back up and whips him headfirst into the window. Franken slides down the side of the car. Coleman then opens the door and rams it into Franken’s head. Franken is dragged back into his car with his left leg hanging out again. Coleman slams the car door repeatedly against Franken’s leg.

Finally, ‘American Screamer’ Howard Dean and ‘No Frills’ Chris Escondido of the Progressive Alliance tackle Coleman and drive him to the ground.

Does this set up a rematch? We will find out soon enough.

—————

11/13/08 PCW NEWSLINE:
Political Championship Wrestling announces: Al Franken vs. Norm Coleman- the rematch- will take place on the November 25th PCW Extreme Political TV.

After taking a savage beating on his leg, will Franken be ready for Coleman? Can Coleman take advantage of Franken’s leg? We’ll find out November 25th.

————–

NORM COLEMAN (American Patriots) vs. AL FRANKEN (Progressive Alliance) from 11/25 PCW EXTREME POLITICAL TV
Franken is fired up. Coleman sidesteps the initial charge and wastes no time attacking Franken’s bad leg. Suave: “Coleman with kicks to Franken and drives him down to one knee…LOW BLOW BY FRANKEN!” Franken does it a second time. Coleman’s turns white and tips over onto the canvas. Suave: “HOLY CRAP!” Franken flails on him. He pulls Coleman up by the hair and throws him through the ropes outside. Coleman topples out of the ring and onto the floor. Franken on the edge of the ring. Flying elbow. Coleman’s legs jerk up at impact and then slam back down. Franken again pulls Coleman up by the hair. Blatant choke. The referee tries to get in the middle but Franken isn’t letting go. Franken gets a chair. *CLANG* He takes out the referee. *CLANG* Down goes Coleman. Franken throws the chair down and again pulls Coleman back up. Chop across the chest. A second one. Franken whips Coleman into the steel guardrail. Coleman flips over the guardrail into the crowd. Suave: “This has been all Al Franken so far.”

Franken is handed a cup of beer. Beer shot to Coleman. Cookie sheet is next. *WHACK* The cookie sheet is bent at a ninety degree angle after Franken uses it. The crowd parts and creates a corridor as Franken pushes Coleman towards the concession stand. Franken throws Coleman head first into the edge of the stand. Coleman finally fights back and pushes Franken away. He tries to fire some shots at Franken. Franken goes hammerlock and then reverses into a side headlock. Coleman reverses into an arm wringer. Franken can’t break the hold so he punches Coleman in the mouth. Franken grabs a squeeze bottle full of ketchup and squirts it in Coleman’s eyes. Franken again chokes out Coleman. Suave: “Coleman’s taken a lot of punishment. How much more can he…say, what is Mark Ritchie doing over there with that rope?” Ritchie throws a rope over a beam and catches it on the other side. Franken drives Coleman towards Ritchie. Franken gets another chair. *CLANG* Coleman staggers. Franken pushes him down at Ritchie’s feet. Ritchie loops the rope around Coleman’s feet. He pulls the rope on the other side and Coleman goes into the air feet first. Suave: “Well, this can’t be good.” Franken gets a chair, winds up, and whacks Coleman with it. Suave: “COLEMAN’S STRUNG UP LIKE A HUMAN PINATA AND FRANKEN’S GOING TO BEAT THE STUFFING OUT OF HIM! *CLANG* HOLY CRAP! *CLANG* The crowd roars. Suave: “A THIRD SHOT. COLEMAN’S A SITTING DUCK…OR A HANGING DUCK…OR WHATEVER…AND HERE COMES TIM PAWLENTY!” Pawlenty runs down and swipes the chair from Franken. *CLANG* Franken staggers backwards. Mark Ritchie makes a run at Pawlenty. *CLANG* And falls backward as well. Franken gets up and charges again. *CLANG* Franken pirouettes and then collapses. Suave: “TIM PAWLENTY CLEANS HOUSE. HE’S CUTTING DOWN COLEMAN AND I DON’T THINK COLEMAN KNOWS WHERE HE’S AT RIGHT NOW!” Pawlenty guides Coleman back towards the ring. Franken gets up a few seconds later. He stumbles towards the ring.

Coleman barely can make it over the steel guardrail. Franken gets his second wind and leaps the guardrail onto Coleman. Again, Franken flails wild punches. Franken pulls him back up. Drop toehold onto a chair. Coleman’s forehead is busted open again. Franken powerbombs Coleman through the timekeeper’s table. Franken stomps on him. He drags Coleman back up and takes him to the ring. Franken rolls Coleman in and climbs the ropes. Coleman gets up. Franken hits a missile drop kick from the top rope sending him right back down. Franken snapmares him into the corner. Huge knee strike. Franken again up top, double axehandle to Coleman. Coleman throws wild punches that miss by several miles. Clothesline by Franken. He covers. 1…2..no, two count. Franken stomps him repeatedly. Franken picks someone up the top turnbuckle. Superplex from the top rope. Cover 1…2…NO! Coleman’s foot is on the ropes. Franken getting a little frustrated. He yanks Coleman back in the ring and climbs up the top turnbuckle. Swanton splash by Franken! ONE… TWO…NO! Suave: “I thought Franken got him. But Coleman kicks out just in time.” Franken sets up for the Piledriver, but Coleman rolls through! Franken takes Coleman up top. Coleman fights off Franken. Half Nelson Suplex by Franken! Another cover. 1…2…again, Coleman kicks out. Franken slams his fist into the canvas. Small package by Franken. Suave: “FRANKEN ROLLS HIM UP. 1…2…3-NO! COLEMAN ROLLED HIM OVER! 1…2…3! HE’S DONE IT!

WINNER: NORM COLEMAN

Franken stands in middle of the ring in complete disbelief. Suave: “FRANKEN CAN’T BELIEVE IT! HE HAD HIM!” Franken stands in the ring with his arms outstretched. Suave: “HE COMPLETELY HAD HIM! FRANKEN HAD HIM PINNED BUT SOMEHOW, COLEMAN ROLLED FRANKEN OVER AND HE GETS THE WIN!” Franken looks over at Coleman. Coleman’s celebrating. An enraged Franken hits Coleman from behind and then throws him head first into the corner turnbuckle. He picks up the chair and jams it into the back of Coleman’s left knee. Coleman falls backward to the canvas. Suave: “FRANKEN’S SNAPPED! HE’S PISSED AND NOW SLAMMING THAT STEEL CHAIR INTO COLEMAN’S KNEE!” Three shots in a row. Tim Pawlenty hits the ring to stop him. Franken blasts him with the chair and sends Pawlenty flying across the ring. Franken throws the chair down and puts Coleman’s leg through it. Suave: “WHAT IS HE DOING? FRANKEN CLIMBING TO THE TURNBUCKLE!” Franken jumps onto the chair. Suave: “HOLY CRAP! FRANKEN’S TRYING TO SNAP HIS LEG LIKE A TWIG!” Coleman grabs his knee and violently writhes in pain. Franken grabs the leg and spins. Coleman: AGGGGGHHHH! Suave: “FIGURE-FOUR! FIGURE FOUR!” Coleman slams the mat with his hands. Suave: “HE’S TRYING TO CRIPPLE COLEMAN…HERE COMES THE RIGHT WING BRIGADIERS!” Rush Limbaugh, Sean Hannity, Laura Ingraham, and Ann Coulter hit the ring. Franken drops the hold and slides out of the ring. Suave: “TOO LATE, THOUGH. THE DAMAGE MAY ALREADY HAVE BEEN DONE!”

————–

12/3 PCW NEWSLINE:
Breaking News: Norm Coleman and Al Franken will conclude their epic series of matches on 12/18 in a Steel Cage Ladder Deathmatch.

If the first two encounters took political extreme to a different level, what’s going to happen when Coleman and Franken step into a steel cage to finish off their feud with an extreme ladder match? The match has been signed according to PCW CEO-designate Barack Obama who worked with the PCW competition committee and current PCW CEO George W to put the match together.

The match will be held in Minnesota as part of a house show event to be called PCW-Completely Deranged.

More info to follow…

—————-

12/8-PCW NEWSLINE:

PCW COMPLETELY DERANGED TO BE ON P-SPAN
PCW CEO-designate Barack Obama announced earlier today that next Thursday’s PCW Completely Deranged will be broadcast on P-SPAN, the political channel. P-SPAN’s very own Brian Lamb will be the special color commentator for the main event- the Steel Cage Ladder Deathmatch between Al Franken and Norm Coleman. You won’t want to miss that.

—————–

STEEL CAGE LADDER DEATHMATCH: AL FRANKEN (Progressive Alliance) vs. NORM COLEMAN (American Patriots) from 12/18/08 PCW COMPLETELY DERANGED
Suave: “All right. The rules are as follows: the first man to climb up and grab the suitcase that’s hanging over the ring wins the match. Pins, submissions, count-outs do not count. Escaping the cage does not count. The only way to win is to grab the suitcase.” Both men inside the cage. Dueling chants of “**** him up Franken” and “**** him up Coleman” start. Immediately Franken attacks. The bell rings. Suave: “HERE WE GO! FRANKEN GOES RIGHT AFTER COLEMAN’S BAD LEG.” Kicks by Franken to the injured left knee. Coleman tries to get out of the ring but Franken yanks him back in. More kicks to the knee. Russian leg sweep by Franken. Suave: “FRANKEN IS NOT MESSING AROUND! HE’S GOING TO INCAPACITATE COLEMAN! BRIAN, WHAT DO YOU THINK?” Lamb: “Johnny, that’s pretty violent. Is this the norm for PCW events?” Suave: “Well…yes….HERE WE GO! FRANKEN’S GOT A CHAIR..” *CLANG* Suave: “HOLY CRAP!” *CLANG* Coleman stumbles back and falls through the ropes to the outside right back the announcer’s table. Lamb: “My God. He’s hurt. Should we help him?” Suave: “That’s probably not advisable, Brian…BECAUSE FRANKEN’S CLIMBED THE TOP ROPE….HE BRINGS THE HEAVY ELBOW DOWN ON COLEMAN!” Franken pulls Coleman up and slams him hard into the steel cage. Then into the ring post. Coleman’s legs are rubbery. Again, into the side of the cage. Again, into the ring post. Franken throws Coleman on the floor. He searches underneath the ring and finds a ladder. He pulls it out and then hoists it over the top rope into the ring. Suave: “THERE’S THE FIRST LADDER OF THE NIGHT! CAN FRANKEN CLIMB UP AND GRAB THE BRIEFCASE?” Franken sets the ladder up in the middle of the ring. He takes one step up and Coleman somehow crawls back into the ring. Franken takes a second step. Coleman is crawling right for the ladder. Franken hops down and kicks Coleman. He picks him up and drags him to the edge of the ring. Franken climbs out and then hops off the edge holding on to Coleman’s head and choking him on the top rope. Coleman whiplashes off the ropes and lands on his back. Suave: “COLEMAN’S IN BIG TROUBLE!” Franken back in. He goes for the Figure Four Leg Lock but Coleman kicks him away. Franken tries a second time and again, Coleman boots him across the ring. Franken climbs out to the edge and heads towards the corner turnbuckle. Coleman suddenly gets up and drop kicks Franken off the ring edge into the steel cage four feet away.

Suave: “HOLY CRAP! FRANKEN HIT THE BACK OF HIS HEAD ON THE STEEL CAGE!” Now it’s Franken in trouble. Coleman inexplicably ignores the ladder and climbs the corner turnbuckle. Suave: “MISSILE DROPKICK FROM THE TOP ROPE SENDS FRANKEN RIGHT BACK INTO THE STEEL CAGE!” Coleman checks under the ring for something. He has it and goes right to Franken. Suave: “CHEESE GRATER! CHEESE GRATER! AND FRANKEN IS BUSTED WIDE OPEN! THE MOMENTUM HAS CHANGED HANDS!” Coleman pulls out a second ladder from underneath the ring. He immediately jams it in Franken’s gut. Coleman whirls it around and connects again. Lamb: “Now, are all these weapons legal?” Suave: “Um…yes…*BONK* …SKILLET! SKILLET!” Coleman comes over to the announcer’s table and motions Lamb out of his chair. Lamb stands. Lamb: “What am I supposed to sit on?” Suave: “Here. Take mine.” Coleman takes Lamb’s chair and *CLANG* *CLANG* Suave: “COLEMAN JUST DRILLED FRANKEN WITH TWO CHAIR SHOTS IN A ROW.” Franken in trouble now. Coleman kicks to the knee. He places Franken leg through the chair. Suave: “HE’S GOING TO DO THE SAME THING FRANKEN DID TO HIM! HE’S GOING TO TRY AND BREAK HIS LEG!” Lamb: “Is that the right thing to do?” Suave: “Well, right and wrong get a little fuzzy in the heat of battle.” Coleman climbs up to the top turnbuckle. Suave: “HE JUMPS…FRANKEN MOVED! HOLY CRAP! COLEMAN JUST KILLED HIMSELF! HE MISSED COMPLETELY AND HIT THE FLOOR HARD!”

Franken crawls back into the ring. Suave: “Franken can’t even stand up.” Coleman also crawls back to the ring. Franken reaches the ladder. Coleman crawls into the ring. Suave: “Franken’s going up. But Coleman is right behind him.” Franken’s about two rungs ahead of Coleman as both climb up opposite sides of the ladder. Franken reaches the top rung first. Coleman’s close enough to where he can start swinging at Franken. Both men try to push each other off the ladder. Franken stands and grabs for the briefcase. Coleman stands and he tries to reach the briefcase. Both latch on to the briefcase at the same time. The ladder suddenly becomes unbalanced. Both Franken and Coleman try to push the other off. Both grab at the briefcase. Lamb: “Isn’t it dangerous for two men to climb up a ladder to try to grab an object suspended in the air?” Suave: “Yes. That’s why you don’t see many ladder- HOLY CRAP! THE LADDER’S FALLING…RIGHT FOR US! BRIAN GET OUT OF THE WAY!” Lamb: “Huh? What?”

Crowd: “HOLY ****!…HOLY ****!…HOLY ****!…“HOLY ****!…HOLY ****!…HOLY ****!…HOLY…PCW!…PCW!…PCW!…PCW!…PCW!…” Suave: “Am I on…hello…okay…THE LADDER TIPPED OVER. FRANKEN AND COLEMAN FOUGHT FOR POSSESSION OF THE BRIEFCASE AS THE LADDER FELL. THE BAD NEWS- THEY JUST DESTROYED THE ANNOUNCER’S TABLE. THE GOOD NEWS- SOMETHING SOFT BROKE THEIR FALL. THE BAD NEWS- BRIAN LAMB OF P-SPAN WAS THE SOFT THING THAT BROKE THEIR FALL. I DIDN’T SEE WHO HAD WHAT. THE REFEREE IS TRYING TO SORT THIS OUT. THE CROWD IS GOING ABSOLUTELY NUTS!…HUH?…OH…OKAY…THE REFEREE IS GOING TO ANNOUNCE THE WINNER…LET’S GO TO THE RING.” Referee: “Okay. This is what I saw. Norm Coleman had possession-” The crowd explodes. Pro-Coleman and Franken chants erupt. Suave: “COLEMAN HAS BEEN DECLARED THE WINNER! THE REFEREE SAW THAT HE HAD THE BRIEFCASE AND CALLED HIM THE WINNER! FRANKEN IS PISSED. HE IMMEDIATELY CONFRONTS THE REFEREE AND HE’S LIGHTING HIM UP! COLEMAN’S OUT OF HERE. HE TOOK THE BRIEFCASE AND LIMPED OUT OF THE CAGE AS QUICKLY AS HE COULD. WHAT? FRANKEN’S CLAIMING THAT HE HAD THE BRIEFCASE AT THE BOTTOM BUT COLEMAN TOOK IT AWAY WHEN THE REFEREE CAME! THEY’RE GOING TO HAVE TO SORT THIS ONE OUT. COLEMAN THE WINNER. BUT MAJOR, MAJOR CONTROVERSY AT THE END OF THE THIRD COLEMAN-FRANKEN MATCH. THIS IS JOHNNY SUAVE FOR AN UNCONSCIOUS BRIAN LAMB, THANKS TO P-SPAN…SORRY ABOUT BRIAN…WE’LL HEAR MORE ABOUT THIS AS IT DEVELOPS.”

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12/20/08 PCW NEWSLINE

JOINT STATEMENT BY PCW CEO GEORGE W. AND PCW CEO-DESIGNATE BARACK OBAMA CONCERNING CONTROVERSIAL ENDING TO COLEMAN/FRANKEN III THURSDAY NIGHT
As everyone is aware, a huge controversy has erupted over The end of the Norm Coleman/Al Franken Steel Cage Ladder Deathmatch. Norm Coleman was declared the winner after the ladder that both he and Al Franken were on toppled over with both men fighting for the briefcase. At that time, the referee determined that Coleman and Franken simultaneously grabbed the suitcase which meant that whomever had control of the suitcase when they hit the ground would win the match. When the referee went over to the announcer’s table, he saw that Coleman had clear possession of the briefcase and called it accordingly.

However, Al Franken strenuously contends that he had possession of the briefcase when they hit the ground and that Coleman took it away from him just as the referee arrived on scene. We have no way to confirm this because both P-SPAN camera covering the event were on the other side of the ring. When the ladder went down, it went down going away from the camera which meant that there was a time period where both wrestlers disappeared from view.

As of right now, the call made on the scene stands. However, PCW will investigate Mr. Franken’s claims and try to locate any evidence that might indicate that he in fact did have possession of the briefcase when they hit the ground. If we can find such evidence, we will overturn the decision made by the referee and award the match to Mr. Franken. We hope to have some type of decision made as early as Tuesday night’s PCW Extreme Political TV.

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FRANKEN/COLEMAN DECISION From 12/23/08 PCW Extreme Political TV
W.:
“All right, y’all. CEO-Designate Obama and I have come out to here announce that we’ve made a decision concerning-” W stops when the bickering going on behind him between Joe Biden and Dick heats up. Biden sticks his finger in Dick’s chest. Dick wags his finger right back at Biden. W: “Um, guys. Do you mind?” Biden and Dick sheepishly walk to opposite sides. W: “As I was saying, we’ve made a decision about the Al Franken/Norm Coleman controversy last Thursday. As you already know, the referee made the call Thursday night that because he saw Norm Coleman with possession of the briefcase, he was awarded the match. However, certain evidence has come to light. Barack? Obama: “Thank you, W. Chris Stellar from the Minnesota Independent came forward with his cell phone camera that recorded what happened as the ladder fell with both Coleman and Franken on it.

CELL PHONE CAMERA ACCOUNT
Coleman and Franken battle. They both grab the suitcase. The ladder becomes unstable and starts to fall. Both men wrestle in the air for possession of the briefcase. The ladder falls directly towards PCW Announcer Johnny Suave’s table. Suave and guest color analyst Brian Lamb from P-SPAN see the ladder falling. Suave dives out of the way. Lamb attempts to cushion the fall. The ladder stops at the ropes and both Coleman and Franken go through the table. Franken clearly has possession of the briefcase. The referee slides out of the ring. Coleman snatches the briefcase away…

Obama: “So, as you can see. We have indisputable proof that Al Franken had possession of the briefcase when both men hit the floor. George W. and I have conferred and we both agree that the only fair thing to do is to award the match to Al Franken.Half the crowd roars. The other half boos. Suave: “THERE YOU HAVE IT! AL FRANKEN IS THE WINNER OF THURSDAY NIGHT’S STEEL CAGE LADDER DEATHMATCH!” Coleman is pissed. He and Franken begin to talk. It quickly becomes heated. Franken taunts Coleman. Coleman attacks Franken. Suave: “HERE WE GO AGAIN!” Both W and Obama clear the ring. Suave: “COLEMAN HAS GONE BERSERK! HE IS PUMMELING FRANKEN…WAIT! HERE COMES THE PCW SECURITY DIRECTOR- SIX FOOT DEMOLITION MACHINE IN A SHORT SKIRT- DAWN McGILL!” McGill and her Singapore cane climb into the ring. She drags Coleman away from Franken. Coleman fights it. McGill Russian Leg Sweeps Coleman with the cane and he falls backwards. Suave: “McGILL TRYING TO BREAK THIS UP. SHE TELLS COLEMAN TO GET OUT OF THE RING. FRANKEN TAUNTS COLEMAN! COLEMAN SNAPS RIGHT UP. McGILL AGAIN PULLS COLEMAN AWAY! FRANKEN CONTINUES TO TAUNT COLEMAN! COLEMAN PUSHES FRANKEN! FRANKEN SLAPS…OHHHH, NO. COLEMAN DUCKS AND FRANKEN SLAPS DAWN McGILL!” McGill’s eyes blaze with fury. She immediately heaves Coleman head first out of the ring. Then she starts slowly towards Franken. Suave: “Al, you just made one of the biggest mistakes ever in your life…and yes, that includes Stuart Smalley- the movie. This gal has sterilized more men with her six inch stilettos than most doctors do in a career.” Backpedeling, Franken tries to apologize. *THWACK* Apparently, it’s not accepted. *THWACK* Franken spins and falls to the canvas. Suave: “Well, I guess Dawn McGill passed her first test as the PCW Security Director!”

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For four months, the feud simmered on the back burner. But when Franken and Coleman were brought together to accept an award for PCW’s best feud of 2008…

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From 4/7/09 PCW Extreme Political TV:

BANQUET ROOM
During the year end PCW awards ceremony for 2008, PCW CEO Barack Obama has just announced the winner of ’2008′s Best Feud’- Al Franken vs. Norm Coleman. Franken and Coleman come up on opposite sides. Obama: “This feud took off at PCW Extreme Election Night and ended with a thrilling, heartstopping ladder cage match in Minneapolis at PCW Completely Deranged. Let’s give these two combatants a hand for bringing some great moments to PCW.” The audience stands up and cheers. Franken and Coleman both acknowledge the crowd. The roaring ovation continues and drowns out Franken and Coleman chirping back and forth at each other. It becomes more heated. Coleman lunges across the dias and tackles Franken…

Suave: “Apparently after all these months and Coleman’s endless appeals to the PCW Competition Committee of the decision on the ladder cage match, they still don’t like each other.”

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From 4/12 PCW On P-SPAN: PCW Investigative Reporter Woodward Bernstein interviews Al Franken of the Progressive Alliance.
Bernstein asks Franken about Tuesday night. Franken replies that Norm Coleman is just bitter and desperate to win at any cost. “The tape said it all,” Franken says- alluding to a tape made at the PCW Completely Deranged event in Minneapolis that showed Franken with the briefcase at the end of their ladder match when they hit the ground.

Coleman runs in, says ‘That’s a lie!’ and tackles Franken. PCW Security Director Dawn McGill and a few others come out to break up the fracas.

————–

Suave: “Well, Al Franken’s in the ring and has something to say. If you’ve been following the whole Franken-Norm Coleman situation, they were together to accept an award last week for the best feud in PCW for 2008. As if on cue, Franken and Coleman scuffled at the dias and the feud seems to have fired back up. Let’s see what Al has to say.” Franken: “Okay. This week, Norm Coleman’s umpteenth appeal of the decision made by the full PCW Competition Committee to award me, Al Franken, the win of our December 18th match at PCW Competely Deranged was turned down again. Let’s see the tape of what happened and what really happened…”

REPLAY FROM 12/18 PCW COMPLETELY DERANGED: ENDING OF AL FRANKEN/NORM COLEMAN MATCH
Suave: “Yes. That’s why you don’t see many ladder- HOLY CRAP! THE LADDER’S FALLING…RIGHT FOR US! BRIAN GET OUT OF THE WAY!” Lamb: “Huh? What?”

Crowd: “HOLY ****!…HOLY ****!…HOLY ****!…“HOLY ****!…HOLY ****!…HOLY ****!…HOLY…PCW!…PCW!…PCW!…PCW!…PCW!…” Suave: “Am I on…hello…okay…THE LADDER TIPPED OVER. FRANKEN AND COLEMAN FOUGHT FOR POSSESSION OF THE BRIEFCASE AS THE LADDER FELL. THE BAD NEWS- THEY JUST DESTROYED THE ANNOUNCER’S TABLE. THE GOOD NEWS- SOMETHING SOFT BROKE THEIR FALL. THE BAD NEWS- BRIAN LAMB OF P-SPAN WAS THE SOFT THING THAT BROKE THEIR FALL. I DIDN’T SEE WHO HAD WHAT. THE REFEREE IS TRYING TO SORT THIS OUT. THE CROWD IS GOING ABSOLUTELY NUTS!…HUH?…OH…OKAY…THE REFEREE IS GOING TO ANNOUNCE THE WINNER…LET’S GO TO THE RING.” Referee: “Okay. This is what I saw. Norm Coleman had possession-” The crowd explodes. Pro-Coleman and Franken chants erupt. Suave: “COLEMAN HAS BEEN DECLARED THE WINNER! THE REFEREE SAW THAT HE HAD THE BRIEFCASE AND CALLED HIM THE WINNER! FRANKEN IS PISSED. HE IMMEDIATELY CONFRONTS THE REFEREE AND HE’S LIGHTING HIM UP! COLEMAN’S OUT OF HERE. HE TOOK THE BRIEFCASE AND LIMPED OUT OF THE CAGE AS QUICKLY AS HE COULD. WHAT? FRANKEN’S CLAIMING THAT HE HAD THE BRIEFCASE AT THE BOTTOM BUT COLEMAN TOOK IT AWAY WHEN THE REFEREE CAME!”

CELL PHONE CAMERA ACCOUNT
Coleman and Franken battle. They both grab the suitcase. The ladder becomes unstable and starts to fall. Both men wrestle in the air for possession of the briefcase. The ladder falls directly towards PCW Announcer Johnny Suave’s table. Suave and guest color analyst Brian Lamb from P-SPAN see the ladder falling. Suave dives out of the way. Lamb attempts to cushion the fall. The ladder stops at the ropes and both Coleman and Franken go through the table. Franken clearly has possession of the briefcase. The referee slides out of the ring. Coleman snatches the briefcase away…

Franken: “So, the tape clearly shows that I, Al Franken, had the briefcase when we hit the ground and that Norm Coleman took the briefcase away from me, Al Franken, before the referee came around. Norm? I know you’re out there somewhere. It’s time to give it up. You’ve lost. I, Al Franken, have won.” Norm Coleman slowly walks towards the ring. Suave: “There he is. Norm Coleman. Will he finally give it up? What will he do? Let’s find out.” Coleman climbs in the ring. Coleman: “Al, this is not pro wrestling fast food. I’m taking this all the way to the top.” Franken: “What. You’re taking this to PCW Owner Bubba Jackson?” Coleman: “Yes.” Franken: “Norm, enough is enough. I, Al Franken, won. You lost.” Coleman: “Like hell I will.” Coleman lunges at Franken. Suave: “HERE WE GO AGAIN! FRANKEN AND COLEMAN ARE THROWING EVERYTHING BUT THE KITCHEN SINK AT EACH OTHER!” PCW Security Director Dawn McGill charges to the ring to break up the fracas.

———————

From 4/19- PCW on P-SPAN…

Progressive Alliance personality Al Franken arrives outside the arena with P.A. Executive Director Tim Kaine. Franken smiles until he’s attacked from the air by Norm Coleman leaping from the roof of a car. Coleman slams Franken’s head into the driver’s side car window and shatters the glass. Kaine whaps Coleman with his briefcase. Newly hired American Patriots Leader Eric Cantor flies in and tackles Kaine.

PCW Security Director Dawn McGill arrives on scene and throws Coleman to the ground. Cantor gets in her face and receives a four inch stiletto heel to the groin from McGill.

Back inside, PCW CEO Barack Obama is in the ring and furious at Coleman’s attack. Obama gets ready to lay down the law when PCW Owner Bubba Jackson makes a surprise appearance. Jackson takes the microphone and states he’s tired of Coleman and Franken dragging this on and on and on. Jackson: “I could make a ruling on Coleman’s appeal to me but I think I have a better idea. Next week on PCW on P-SPAN, we will have in our main event Norm Coleman of the American Patriots versus Al Franken of the Progressive Alliance to settle their differences once and for all in a Hardcore Barbed Wire Deathmatch!”

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So there you have it. Tomorrow night this feud ends once and for all. Franken versus Coleman in a Hardcore Steelcage Deathmatch. From Political Championship Wrestling

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More stories about:

Al Franken & Norm Coleman: The Zoo, The Swamp , Caffeinated Politics, AOL, Raabe Review, Minnesota Post.com, Family Security Matters, USA Today, Overruled, Det Free Press,

4/25-PCW Newsline: Nancy Pelosi, Janeane Garafalo, Classic Movie Debuts, A Look at Tomorrow Night’s PCW on P-SPAN


Hey y’all. Gina Ramsey here with this week’s Political Championship Wrestling Newsline. Here’s what’s in the news in PCW:

PCW Extreme Political TV Recap/PCW Wrestler of the Week/PCW Transactions/A Preview of Sunday Night’s PCW on P-SPAN/Upcoming Events.

Also, we’ll also have a special PCW Extra featuring the Franken/Coleman feud today.

Recap of 4/22-PCW Extreme Political TV
-Nancy Pelosi and Janeane Garofalo came out and trashed the American Heartland Coalition. PCW Women’s Champion ‘Extreme Pizza Delivery Girl’ Tessa Martin came out and left.

-Domination Inc’s new WMD Big Monster Wahlie easily dispatched Michael Hunt (Island of Misfit Wrestlers).

-Former Domination Inc. member Daisy Cutter-Bomb asked for forgiveness from her brothers Hy Drogen Bomb and Incendiary Bomb.

-Movie Classic makes his debut in PCW and tries to rally the Island of Misfit Wrestlers.

-Newt Tron Bomb (American Patriots) def. SNAFU w/Dr. Bill (Independent) when the Island of Misfit Wrestlers, led by Movie Classic, hit the ring and interfered, costing SNAFU the match.

-The Angry Left Wing Bloggers find Garofalo lying unconscious on the floor with the letter ‘W’ spraypainted on her back. They call out both the American Heartland Coalition and W’s Image Rehab and Truth Squad and demand to find out who did it. Garofalo attacks ‘Extreme Pizza Delivery Girl’ Tessa Martin and a cage match is set for Sunday night on PCW on P-SPAN

-Main event: H-Bomb and I-Bomb (American Patriots) def. the Raving Rednecks Locke and Loade

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PCW WRESTLER OF THE WEEK: MOVIE CLASSIC
Newcomer Movie Classic made a huge impact heard in PCW Wednesday night by cutting a killer promo and leading the Island of Misfit Wrestlers to a little revenge on Dr. Bill.

Movie Classic Promo from 4/22 PCW Extreme Political TV
A guy wearing sunglasses and a tacky sports coat walks in. MAN: “Look at this dressing room. I see dead people. Mama always said life was like a box of chocolates. You never know what you’re gonna get.” Jimmy: “Who are you?” MAN: “I’m Movie Classic. Listen to them. Children of the night. What music they make?” Snott: “What. Listen to children do what? What are you talking about?” DVD: “Really. Just leave us alone to our fate.” Dredd Pirate Dougie: “War’s over, man. Dr. Bill dropped the big one on us.” Movie Classic: “Over? Did you say “over”? Nothing is over until we decide it is! Was it over when the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor? Hell no!” Richard Headd: “Germans?” Dr. Rectum: “Shhhh, he’s rolling.” Movie Classic: “And it ain’t over now. ‘Cause when the goin’ gets tough…” A long pause follows. The Island of Misfit Wrestlers wait…and wait…and wait for him to finish the sentence. Movie Classic: “…the the tough get goin’! Who’s with me? Let’s go!” Movie Classic bounds out of the locker room- no one follows him.

Then he returns. Movie Classic: “What the f*** happened to the Island of Misfit Wrestlers I used to watch? Where’s the spirit? Where’s the guts, huh? This could be the greatest night of our lives, but you’re gonna let it be the worst. “Ooh, we’re afraid to go with you Movie Classic, we might get our asses kicked again. Well just kiss my ass from now on! Not me! I’m not gonna take this. Dr. Bill, he’s a dead man! SNAFU, dead! Domination Inc… Dr. Ivan Rectum stands up. Dr. Rectum: DEAD! Movie Classic’s right. Psychotic, but absolutely right. We gotta take these bastards. Now we could do it with conventional weapons that could take years and cost millions of lives. No, I think we have to go all out. I think that this situation absolutely requires a really futile and stupid gesture be done on somebody’s part.” The other members of the Island of Misfit Wrestlers nod in agreement. Richard Headd: “And we’re just the guys to do it!” DVD: “LET’S DO IT!” Movie Classic: “LET’S DO IT!”

Replay of SNAFU w/Dr. Bill (Independent) vs. NEWT TRON BOMB w/S.M. Art Bomb (American Patriots) match from 4/22 PCW Extreme Political TV
Suave: “N-BOMB IS IN TROUBLE! MOONSAULT PRESS ON THE WAY…NAILED IT! COVER. ONE…TWO…N-BOMB GETS HIS SHOULDER UP!” Dr. Bill slides a chair in the ring. Suave: “SNAFU sets the chair up for the Triple Jump Moonsault. WAIT A MINUTE! HOLY CRAP! JIMMY FROM SO CAL JUST PUSHED SNAFU OFF TH ROPES!” Movie Classic comes up to Dr. Bill. Movie Classic: “Say hello to my little friends!” Richard Headd, Snott Flemmstein, and Dredd Pirate Douggie tackle Dr. Bill.

Suave: “IT’S THE ISLAND OF MISFIT WRESTLERS! THEY’RE PUMMELING DR. BILL!” SNAFU is up and staggers towards the ring. Suave: “S.M. ART BOMB THROWS SNAFU BACK IN THE RING. N-BOMB STICK HIS BUTT IN HIS FACE. OOOOOHHHH! ICK! SILENT BUT DEADLY! SILENT BUT DEADLY! N-BOMB COVERS. ONE. TWO. THREE!”


WINNER: NEWT TRON BOMB


————

Suave: “Movie Classic leads the Island of Misfit Wrestlers to get their revenge on Dr. Bill for leading them to be slaughtered by Domination Inc. last Sunday. AND THEY’RE NOT DONE YET! THEY’VE SET UP A TABLE AND DRAPED DR. BILL ON IT. DVD TO THE TOP ROPE. HE JUMPS. HE MISSES! OW! ALL RIGHT, HERE’S DREDD PIRATE DOUGGIE. *CRUNCH* HOLY CRAP!” Dr. Bill is driven through the table. Another PCW chant starts up.

PCW TRANSACTIONS
Here’s the comings and goings in Political Championship Wrestling this week:
Incoming: Movie Classic signed on with PCW and will manage the Island of Misfit Wrestlers. Also coming in:
-Dr. Mysterio
-Mr. Jaundice
-Captain Nausea

All three will join Movie Classic in the Island of Misfit Wrestlers

Outgoing: Halitosis- ‘The Luchador with the Insanely Foul Breath’ will be taking a leave to go overseas for a few months.
Also leaving PCW for awhile:
-Union Jac
-DLC
-The American Bikers: Little Paulie and Big Paulie

Moving: NRA jumps from Politically Incorrect to join SarahPAC.
Also moving within PCW:
-Politically Incorrect (‘The Princess of Political Incorrectness’ Andrea Doria, Al Cahall, and Nic Koteen) has joined up with the American Heartland Coalition

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PREVIEWING THE CARD FOR 4/26 PCW on P-SPAN SHOW:
-The Green World Order (Brock Cole Lee and GreenPete w/PeaceNick and Peta from PETA) vs. Grizzly Adam and NRA w/’The Alaskan Pitbull’ Sarah Palin (SarahPAC)

-Non Title Cage Match: Janeane Garofalo (Progressive Alliance) vs. ‘Extreme Pizza Delivery Girl’ Tessa Martin (c)

-PCW Title Match: ‘No Frills’ Chris Escondido (Progressive Alliance) vs. Newt Tron Bomb (American Patriots)

-Hardcore Steel Cage Deathmatch: Norm Coleman (American Patriots) vs. Al Franken (Progressive Alliance)

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UPCOMING EVENTS:
4/26- PCW on P-SPAN
4/29- PCW Extreme Political TV
5/1- PCW Newsline
5/3- PCW on P-SPAN
5/6- PCW Extreme Political TV
5/8- PCW Newsline
5/10- PCW on P-SPAN
5/13- PCW Extreme Political TV

6/7- PCW Loose Cannons Unleashed IV

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Political Championship Wrestling is now at Twitter:
http://twitter.com/PCWPolWrestling

And on Facebook:
http://www.facebook.com/home.php#/pages/Political-Championship-Wrestling/70370737677?ref=mf

Befriend us. Follow us.

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Other political stories on:

Nancy Pelosi: Trader Aaron, Fox News, Start Thinking Right, DPGI, Politico, RBO, Good Time Politics, America’s Watchtower, MSNBC, Morgan Writes,

Janeane Garofalo: Dallas News, Regnat Populis, 84 Rules, Randy Hollingsworth, In Forum, News Hounds, Harrington Report,

Huffington Post: Arianna  Paul Begala, John Kerry, Can I Just My Finish Waffle?,

4/22-PCW Extreme Political TV: Nancy Pelosi, Janeane Garofalo Confront the American Heartland Coalition, The debut of Domination Inc.’s latest weapon of mass destruction- Big Monster Wahlie

Skank Mitchell celebrates Moon Day/The debut of Domination Inc.’s latest weapon of mass destruction- Big Monster Wahlie/Movie Classic Debuts/

4/22-PCW EXTREME POLITICAL TV from Athens, Ohio
HOSTS: Johnny Suave and his life size cardboard cut-out of Shania Twain

Crowd chants ‘PCW!…PCW!’ Suave: “HELLO AND WELCOME TO P-C-W!” Suave poses and pauses. Suave: “I AM JOHNNY SUAVE! THIS HOT PIECE OF CARDBOARD IS SHANIA TWAIN. WELCOME TO ANOTHER EDITION OF PCW EXTREME POLITICAL TV! SUNDAY NIGHT ON PCW ON P-SPAN SAW SOME BIG THINGS GO DOWN. LET’S RECAP WHAT HAPPENED.”

4/19 PCW on P-SPAN Recap
-Mercedes (Domination Inc.) def. “Trailer Park Sweetheart” Tanya Hardy with the White Trash Posse (Independent) via submission to the Mercedes Bendz.

Post match, Domination Inc. members ran out and beat down Hardy and her two White Trash Posse compadres. PCW Security Director Dawn McGill came out to reestablish order.

-Progressive Alliance personality Al Franken was attacked by Norm Coleman as he arrived outside the arena with P.A. Executive Director Tim Kaine. Coleman slams Franken’s head into the driver’s side car window and shatters the glass. Kaine whaps Coleman with his briefcase. Newly hired American Patriots Leader Eric Cantor flies in and tackles Kaine. PCW Security Director Dawn McGill arrives on scene and throws Coleman to the ground. Cantor gets in her face and receives a four inch stiletto heel to the groin from McGill.

Inside, PCW CEO Barack Obama is ready to lay down the law when PCW Owner Bubba Jackson makes an appearance. Jackson: “I could make a ruling on Coleman’s appeal to me but I think I have a better idea. Next week on PCW on P-SPAN, we will have in our main event Norm Coleman of the American Patriots versus Al Franken of the Progressive Alliance to settle their differences once and for all in a Hardcore Barbed Wire Deathmatch!”

-Cadillac (Domination Inc.) vs. Richard Headd of Guys With Unfortunate First Names Given Their Last Name (Dr. Bill’s Island of Misfit Wrestlers)- no match. Headd before the bell by Jaguar. Dr. Bill and the rest of the Island of Misfit Wrestlers run in but Dr. Bill holds SNAFU back and they leave. Domination Inc. destroyed the Island of Misfit Wrestlers before PCW Security Director Dawn McGill chased them off.

PCW Investigative Reporter Woodward Bernstein asked Dr. Bill why he turned his back on the Island of Misfit Wrestlers. Dr. Bill: “Failure is no accident. You cannot be who and what you are unless you have a lifestyle, both internally and externally, that is designed to support that definition of self. I tried to raise up the Island of Misfit Wrestlers. I did the best I could. But in the end, a defining moment is much like a burn. If you lean up against a hot stove, in less than a second the event is over. But the pain can last for weeks, months. The Island of Misfit Wrestlers have to learn from these tough moments and it will make them better.” Dr. Bill added that he wanted to refocus his energies on making SNAFU the next PCW Television Champion.

-Main Event for the PCW Women’s Title: ‘Extreme Pizza Delivery Girl’ Tessa Martin (American Heartland Coalition)def. Emily List (Progressive Alliance) and Code Pink (Progressive Alliance) via Pizza Cutter on List.

At the end, former Domination Inc. member Daisy Cutter-Bomb (also former member of the Three Amigas with Tessa Martin and Tequila Sheila ) walked to the ring and asked if she can join the American Heartland Coalition. Tessa and Tequila Sheila walked away from her in disgust.

————-

Suave: “Lot’s of stuff going on as you can tell. Let’s head to the-” Nancy Pelosi and Janeane Garofalo walk to the ring. Suave: “Okay. What the hell is Janeane Garofolo doing here? It might have something to do with this…”

REPLAY from 4/19 PCW on P-SPAN: Main Event for the PCW Women’s Title: ‘Extreme Pizza Delivery Girl’ Tessa Martin (American Heartland Coalition) vs. Emily List (Progressive Alliance) vs. Code Pink (Progressive Alliance)
Pelosi climbs into the ring with a steel folding chair and sneaks behind Tessa. Tessa turns around and sees her. KRC rushes at the Extreme Pizza Delivery Girl, Tessa sidesteps KRC’s charge and Pelosi gets crunched in the corner. This brings out both the Angry Left Wing Bloggers (Daily Kos, Media Matters, Eric Alterman, and Paul Krugman) and Domination Inc. But before either group can make it to the ring, they end up brawling outside the ring with each other. In the chaos, Tessa Pizza Cutters Emily List and grabs the pin.

Pelosi: “Last week, that trailer trash redneck Andrea Doria and Politically Incorrect interfered with Emily List and Code Pink as they were trying to win the PCW Women’s Title. As a result, the extremists from the American Heartland Coalition won.” Garofalo: “Let’s be very honest about what this is about. It’s not about bashing the Progressive Alliance. The American Heartland Coalition doesn’t support PCW CEO Barack Obama because they’re straight up racists. They’re nothing more but a bunch of teabagging rednecks just like former CEO George W was.” Suave: “WOW! Where did THAT come from? She has a right to her opinion but come on, that was hate filled bile.” PCW Women’s Champion ‘Extreme Pizza Delivery Girl’ Tessa Martin comes out. Suave: “I wonder what the PCW Champion is going say about this.” Tessa looks at Garofolo and Pelosi distainfully. She mouths ‘you’re not worth it’ and leaves.

The crowd cheers as Tessa walks back to the dressing room. Suave: “ALL RIGHT! THE PCW EXTREME PIZZA DELIVERY GIRL AGAIN DOESN’T DIGNIFY PELOSI OR GAROFALO WITH A RESPONSE…HOLD ON! WHAT IN HEAVEN’S NAME IS SKANK MITCHELL DOING IN THE RING?” Skank gets into the ring with Pelosi and Garofalo. Skank: “Everybody knows that today is Earth Day.” Pelosi and Garofalo applaud. Skank: “But what about the moon. Our celestrial neighbor that circles us? How come we don’t have a day for the moon?” Suave: “YEAH! Why not?” Pelosi and Garofalo now look confused. Skank: “So here’s what I propose. I think we oughta celebrate MOON day as well.” Suave: “Okay. I’m all for that, I guess.” Skank: “So…here we go.” Skank turns his back and pulls down his pants. Suave: “HOLY CRAP!” Pelosi and Garofalo become disgusted and quickly exit the ring. The crowd gives Skank a standing ovation.

————–

UPCOMING SHOWS:PCW would like to highlight other e-federations who are out there. Check them out:

XWW presents Saturday night Carnage
April 25, 2009 all day – XWW arena Elimira N.Y.

SWF Superstar Showcase
April 25, 2009 from 7pm to 10pm – SWF Arena in Orlando, FL

WTF Intensity
April 26, 2009 from 9pm to 11pm – WTF Headquarters

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The Titan Zone

A social network about e-wrestling. Meet and get to know the Titans of the e-wrestling world!

————

MATCH #1
BIG MONSTER WAHLIE…aka BMW w/Cadillac, Jaguar, and Rough Justice: D.B. Ruff and Connor Justice (Domination Inc.) vs.
MICHAEL HUNT of ‘Guys with Unfortunate Last Names Given Their First Name (Island of Misfit Wrestlers)
Suave:
“Okay. It’s the in-ring debut of Domination Inc’s newest Weapon of Mass Destruction- the seven foot monster Big Monster Wahlie. Poor Michael Hunt.” Bell rings. Hunt tries to stay away from Big Monster. Suave: “Hunt, trying to steer clear of the big guys paws…and no. Big body slam by Big Monster. OW! He stomps away at Hunt who tries to crawl to the ropes…but Big Monster drags him right back to the middle. He pulls Hunt to his feet, spins him around and lifts him up…ELECTRIC CHAIR FACEBUSTER! HOLY CRAP! ONE…TWO…THREE.”

WINNER: BIG MONSTER WAHLIE

“That was quick. OH NO…WAIT A MINUTE! BIG MONSTER HAS HIM UP AGAIN… OHHHHHHH ANOTHER ELECTRIC CHAIR FACEBUSTER! AND I THINK HUNT’S KNOCKED OUT!” The referee tries to wave Big Monster off. Suave: “HOLY CRAP! ELECTRIC CHAIR FACEBUSTER TO THE REFEREE! BIG MONSTER’S GONE NUTS AND WHY HAVEN’T CADILLAC OR JAGUAR OR ROUGH JUSTICE DONE ANYTHING TO STOP THIS?”

Suave:

———–

BACKSTAGE

Hy Drogen Bomb and Incendiary Bomb confer with their manager, S.M. Art Bomb. A somber looking and nervous Daisy Cutter-Bomb walks in. H-Bomb sees her. H-Bomb: “What the hell do you want?” Daisy: “Look, I…I was kinda hoping that you and A-Bomb and I-Bomb and N-Bomb would forgive me for what I did. I’m…sorry…very, very sorry.” H-Bomb: “Do you think that you can just walk in here, say you’re sorry for turning on your own family and stabbing us in the back by working for Mr. McMann, and think everything’s going to just be hunky dorey?” Daisy: “No…” Tears appear in her eyes. Daisy: “I’m sorry, H-Bomb. What I did was wrong and I know that now.” H-Bomb: “Daisy, I don’t know. I’ll think about it. Now, if you’ll excuse us, we’ve got a match in a little while.

Suave: “Last week, Daisy Cutter-Bomb’s former 3 Amigas partners Tequila Sheila and Tessa Martin spurned her, just walked away from her when she asked to join the American Heartland Coalition. But when we’re talking about family…well? That may be a whole different story. More to come on this I’m sure.”

————–

ISLAND OF MISFIT WRESTLERS LOCKER ROOM
A very woozy Michael Hunt sits on a bench with a bag of eye on his face. The rest of the Island of Misfit Wrestlers (Jimmy from So Cal- Jim Rome clone wannabee, Snott Flemmstein, Richard Headd of ‘Guys With Unfortunate First Names Given Their Surname,’ Dredd Pirate Douggie, Dick Van Dam, and Dr. Ivan Rectum- Fighting Proctologist) stand dejectedly in the locker room.

A guy wearing sunglasses and a tacky sports coat walks in. MAN: “Look at this dressing room. I see dead people. Mama always said life was like a box of chocolates. You never know what you’re gonna get.” Jimmy: “Who are you?” MAN: “I’m Movie Classic. Listen to them. Children of the night. What music they make?” Snott: “What. Listen to children do what? What are you talking about?” DVD: “Really. Just leave us alone to our fate.” Dredd Pirate Dougie: “War’s over, man. Dr. Bill dropped the big one on us.” Movie Classic: “Over? Did you say “over”? Nothing is over until we decide it is! Was it over when the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor? Hell no!” Richard Headd: “Germans?” Dr. Rectum: “Shhhh, he’s rolling.” Movie Classic: “And it ain’t over now. ‘Cause when the goin’ gets tough…” A long pause follows. The Island of Misfit Wrestlers wait…and wait…and wait for him to finish the sentence. Movie Classic: “…the the tough get goin’! Who’s with me? Let’s go!” Movie Classic bounds out of the locker room- no one follows him.

Then he returns. Movie Classic: “What the f*** happened to the Island of Misfit Wrestlers I used to watch? Where’s the spirit? Where’s the guts, huh? This could be the greatest night of our lives, but you’re gonna let it be the worst. “Ooh, we’re afraid to go with you Movie Classic, we might get our asses kicked again. Well just kiss my ass from now on! Not me! I’m not gonna take this. Dr. Bill, he’s a dead man! SNAFU, dead! Domination Inc… Dr. Ivan Rectum stands up. Dr. Rectum: DEAD! Movie Classic’s right. Psychotic, but absolutely right. We gotta take these bastards. Now we could do it with conventional weapons that could take years and cost millions of lives. No, I think we have to go all out. I think that this situation absolutely requires a really futile and stupid gesture be done on somebody’s part.” The other members of the Island of Misfit Wrestlers nod in agreement. Richard Headd: “And we’re just the guys to do it!” DVD: “LET’S DO IT!” Movie Classic: “LET’S DO IT!”

————

Suave: “O-kay. And speaking of Dr. Bill. This is what he had to say Sunday night about abandoning the Island of Misfit Wrestlers.

REPLAY from 4/19 PCW on P-SPAN: Dr. Bill’s Explanation to PCW Investigative Reporter Woodward Bernstein concerning the Island of Misfit Wrestlers.
“Failure is no accident. You cannot be who and what you are unless you have a lifestyle, both internally and externally, that is designed to support that definition of self. I tried to raise up the Island of Misfit Wrestlers. I did the best I could. But in the end, a defining moment is much like a burn. If you lean up against a hot stove, in less than a second the event is over. But the pain can last for weeks, months. The Island of Misfit Wrestlers have to learn from these tough moments and it will make them better.”

MATCH #2
SNAFU w/Dr. Bill (Independent) vs.
NEWT TRON BOMB w/S.M. Art Bomb (American Patriots)
Suave:
“SNAFU trying to get himself in line for a shot at the PCW Television Title. N-Bomb looking for a rematch for the title after giving Champion ‘No Frills’ Chris Escondido everything he could handle and more. There’s the bell. They lockup. N-Bomb gets driven down with a shove off the ropes. Forearm by SNAFU. N-Bomb avoids SNAFU and counters with a drop toe hold. SNAFU charges the corner and nails N-Bomb with a missile kick. SNAFU throws N-Bomb down hard. N-Bomb gets the boot up on a second charge and spins SNAFU back. N-Bomb tries to move around for a headscissors. YOW! Back kick to the groin by SNAFU.” N-Bomb is bent over. SNAFU climbs up the turnbuckle. Suave: “There he goes…YES! GUILLOTINE LEG DROP FROM THE TOP ROPE!” A PCW chant breaks out.

Suave: “SNAFU looking very good so far. It looks like the hours of studying Sabu’s ECW matches is starting to pay off. N-Bomb locked in a cobra clutch now and tries to escape. Short arm clothesline now by SNAFU. N-Bomb reverses and locks in a chinlock. HOLY CRAP! ANOTHER GROIN SHOT BY SNAFU. SPINNING NECKBREAKER! SNAFU chucks N-Bomb in the corner. DOUBLE KNEE SMASH! N-BOMB IS IN TROUBLE! MOONSAULT PRESS ON THE WAY…NAILED IT! COVER. ONE…TWO…N-BOMB GETS HIS SHOULDER UP!” Dr. Bill slides a chair in the ring. Suave: “SNAFU sets the chair up for the Triple Jump Moonsault. WAIT A MINUTE! HOLY CRAP! JIMMY FROM SO CAL JUST PUSHED SNAFU OFF TH ROPES!” Movie Classic comes up to Dr. Bill. Movie Classic: “Say hello to my little friends!” Richard Headd, Snott Flemmstein, and Dredd Pirate Douggie tackle Dr. Bill.

Suave: “IT’S THE ISLAND OF MISFIT WRESTLERS! THEY’RE PUMMELING DR. BILL!” SNAFU is up and staggers towards the ring. Suave: “S.M. ART BOMB THROWS SNAFU BACK IN THE RING. N-BOMB STICK HIS BUTT IN HIS FACE. OOOOOHHHH! ICK! SILENT BUT DEADLY! SILENT BUT DEADLY! N-BOMB COVERS. ONE. TWO. THREE!”

WINNER: NEWT TRON BOMB

Suave: “Movie Classic leads the Island of Misfit Wrestlers to get their revenge on Dr. Bill for leading them to be slaughtered by Domination Inc. last Sunday. AND THEY’RE NOT DONE YET! THEY’VE SET UP A TABLE AND DRAPED DR. BILL ON IT. DVD TO THE TOP ROPE. HE JUMPS. HE MISSES! OW! ALL RIGHT, HERE’S DREDD PIRATE DOUGGIE. *CRUNCH* HOLY CRAP!” Dr. Bill is driven through the table. Another PCW chant starts up.

BACKSTAGE
Janeane Garofalo lies face down on the floor with the letter ‘W’ spray painted on her back. Paul Krugman, Daily Kos, and Eric Alterman attend to her.

——————

The E-Wrestling Magazine is the home for all the latest news on e-federations all across the country. Check out the latest stories:

Just Wrestling: The Silver Lining Monday, 20 April 2009 (/)
Dream Wrestling Talent Names Leaked Monday, 20 April 2009 (/)
Seven Random Roleplays 04.19.09 Monday, 20 April 2009 (/)
THE HYPE Monday, 20 April 2009 (/)
SWF Superstar Showcase Preview Monday, 20 April 2009 (/)
4/19-PCW on P-SPAN: Al Franken and Norm Coleman Next Sunday in a Hardcore Barbed Wire Deathmatch Sunday, 19 April 2009 (/)
SWF Superstar Showcase Saturday, 18 April 2009 (/)
4/17-Political Championship Wrestling Newsline Friday, 17 April 2009 (/)
Fans Wrestling Organization reAction Report Friday, 17 April 2009 (/)
William aka Zortalk 04.16.09

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Fed Wars.org - Fed Wars is an interfed promotion currently run by Ben Halkum. There are a number of e-feds already involved in this project. There’s going to be a Unified Championship tournament that looks HUGE and a Platinum Prestige Championship match Shawn FX is probably going to win.

—————–

REPLAY from 4/19-PCW on P-SPAN: Franken/Coleman Brawl
Progressive Alliance personality Al Franken arrives outside the arena with P.A. Executive Director Tim Kaine. Franken smiles until he’s attacked from the air by Norm Coleman leaping from the roof of a car. Coleman slams Franken’s head into the driver’s side car window and shatters the glass…

…PCW Owner Bubba Jackson makes a surprise appearance. Jackson takes the microphone and states he’s tired of Coleman and Franken dragging this on and on and on. Jackson: “I could make a ruling on Coleman’s appeal to me but I think I have a better idea. Next week on PCW on P-SPAN, we will have in our main event Norm Coleman of the American Patriots versus Al Franken of the Progressive Alliance to settle their differences once and for all in a Hardcore Barbed Wire Deathmatch!”

Suave: Sunday night on PCW on P-SPAN from Minneapolis. Al Franken and Norm Coleman once and for all in a Hardcore Barbed Wire Deathmatch. You just get the feeling that Coleman just doesn’t take Franken seriously. Yet, he keeps losing to him. Hang on…the Angry Left Wing Bloggers are in the ring.” Daily Kos: “American Heartland Coalition. Get your asses out here right now! W’s flunkies! You, too.” Suave: “Whoa. He’s calling out both the A.H.C. and W’s Image Rehab and Truth Squad.” PCW Women’s Champion ‘Extreme Pizza Delivery Girl’ Tessa Martin leads out the American Heartland Coalition. ‘The Mastermind’ Karl Rove comes out with Andrew Card, Dana Perino, and Ari Fleischer. Daily Kos: “All right. You, Tessa Martin, are in co-hoots with Rove and his band of extremists.” Tessa: “You know, I’ve just about had enough of you and your whacked out friends. You’ve come out here the last two weeks and accused the American Heartland Coalition of things that are flat out lies. You guys make me sick. You can take your-” Suave: “THAT’S JANEANE GAROFALO! SHE JUST TACKLED TESSA MARTIN AND WE HAVE OURSELVES A CAT-FIIIIIIGHT! CAT-FIIIIIIIIIIIIGHT! ALL HELL’S BROKEN LOOSE! THE ANGRY LEFT WING BLOGGERS AND THE AMERICAN HEARTLAND COALITION ARE GOING AT IT!” PCW Security Director Dawn McGill comes in again to restore order.

——————-

UPCOMING EVENTS:
4/24- PCW Newsline
4/26- PCW on P-SPAN
4/29- PCW Extreme Political TV
5/1- PCW Newsline
5/3- PCW on P-SPAN
5/6- PCW Extreme Political TV
5/8- PCW Newsline
5/10- PCW on P-SPAN
5/13- PCW Extreme Political TV

6/7- PCW Loose Cannons Unleashed IV

—————-

MATCH #3- MAIN EVENT
HY DROGEN BOMB and INCENDIARY BOMB w/S.M. Art Bomb (American Patriots) vs.
‘The Raving Rednecks’ LOCKE AND LOADE (SarahPAC)
Suave:
“Hold on to your hats, this one’s going to be a Pier 6 brawl. H-Bomb and Gary Locke to start. H-Bomb grabs the upper hand. Locke avoids a charge in the corner. I-Bomb grabs him… and throws him outside the ring….hold on…this just in. Sunday night, PCW Women’s champion ‘Extreme Pizza Delivery Girl’ Tessa Martin (American Heartland Coalition) will meet Janeane Garofalo (Progressive Alliance) in a Steel Cage Deathmatch Sunday night on PCW on P-SPAN.”

Locke rams H-Bomb’s head into the corner turnbuckle. Suave: “They’re still just slugging it out. H-Bomb crotches Locke on the handrail and slides him down it! HOLD ON! WE’VE GOT TO GO TO THE BACK…”

BACKSTAGE
In the back, Dick Cheney hovers over the prone bodies of the four Angry Left Wing Bloggers with a barbed wire covered baseball bat. Fleischer, Perino, and Card stand behind him. Dick: “Sometimes, harsh techniques produces results. Sometimes, you have to take it to the extreme.”

Suave: “Meanwhile…LOADE’S GOT A SUNSET FLIP! One…Two…NO! Just barely kicked out. LOCKE’S IN THE RING! YESSSSS! REDNECK 4-D DEATH BOMB! COVER. ONE…TWO…IT’S DAISY CUTTER-BOMB! SHE’S IN THE RING AND…HOLY CRAP! SHE JUST KICKED THE CRAP OUT OF LOADE! HOLD ON! I-BOMB HAS LOCKE ON THE TOP ROPE…YES! BLUNT FORCE TRAUMA! BLUNT FORCE TRAUMA! COVER. ONE. TWO. THREE!

WINNER: H-BOMB and I-BOMB

Suave: “DAISY CUTTER-BOMB JUST SAVED THE DAY FOR I-BOMB AND H-BOMB! WE’LL FIND OUT SOON ENOUGH IF HER FAMILY IS WILLING TO TAKE HER BACK IN. WE’LL SEE YOU NEXT WEEK.”

—————-

Other political stories about:
Nancy Pelosi: Loud and ClearEat It or Wear It, The Conservative Republic, CNN, DPGI, Hot Air, NY Times, Howie Rich, Politico

Janeane Garofalo: Village Voice, Cinie’s World, CSM, Let Freedom Rain, Guffy Conservative, Aiken Area Progressive, The Right Side, Associated Content, Mary Kay Cary, Start Thinking Right,

Franken and Coleman: Politico, NY Times, Huff Post, Twin Cities.com, Huff Post, Minnesota Independent

4/19-PCW on P-SPAN: Al Franken and Norm Coleman to Meet Next Sunday in a Hardcore Barbed Wire Deathmatch

Nancy Pelosi takes on the American Heartland Coalition/Domination Inc. stays strong thanks to its new recruits/Former Domination Inc. member Daisy Cutter-Bomb tries to find a new home.

4/19 PCW on P-SPAN Results from Harrisburg, PA

Match #1: Mercedes (Domination Inc.) defeats “Trailer Park Sweetheart” Tanya Hardy with the White Trash Posse (Independent) via submission to the Mercedes Bendz.

Post match, Domination Inc. members Porsche Lexus, Big Oil, Kirk Walstreit, and Rough Justice: D.B. Ruff and Connor Justice- two former police officers fired due to their extreme methods of law enforcement, ran out and beat down Hardy and her two White Trash Posse compadres. PCW Security Director Dawn McGill came out and reestablished order. Both Big Oil and Walstreit, victims of kicks to the groin with McGill’s four inch stilettos, quickly hightailed it out of there.

————

A quick review of the Domination Inc. Press Release from Friday:

“Domination Inc. announces the hiring of five new wrestlers to its stable: Cadillac, Jaguar, Big Monster Whalie, Mercedes, and Porsche Lexus. All five wrestlers debuted last Sunday night during the PCW on P-SPAN show and already have made a huge difference in reestablishing Domination Inc. as the ultimate corporate force in PCW.

“Domination Inc. CEO ‘THE Sports Entertainment Genius’ Mr. McMann commented: “The addition of Big Monster Whalie aka BMW, Cadillac, Jaguar, Mercedes, and Porsche Lexus will jump start our efforts to takeover Political Championship Wrestling and remake it in my image. We have already shown that the PCW Champion O’Beck Bahama is no match for our Big Monster and I’m very confident that the PCW Title will shortly be in the Domination Inc. stable. Cadillac and Jaguar are capable wrestler who will help Domination Inc. with our bottom line. Mercedes and Porsche Lexus will allow Domination Inc. to reenter the PCW Women’s title chase and bring the title back to us.”

“CFO Gordon Guyko adds: “This move will maneuver Domination Inc. back to the top of PCW and is money well spent. Our goals are simple: Domination Inc. will control all four PCW title belts by PCW Loose Cannons Unleashed 5 on June 7th. With the addition of BMW, Cadillac, Jaguar, Mercedes, and Porsche Lexus to Domination Inc., I am quite confident we will hit our target objective.

“Domination Inc. also announces the formal releases of Daisy Cutter-Bomb, and Mia Margarita. Mr. McMann says: “Unfortunately, both women were not performing up to standard in reaching our corporate objectives. We wish them well in their future endeavors.”

“About Domination Inc.: Domination Inc. is a consortium of wrestlers dedicated to making the group the elite in Political Championship Wrestling. Our mission statement is simple: Domination Inc. will facilitate the takeover of PCW by any and all means available to us.”

———–

Progressive Alliance personality Al Franken arrives outside the arena with P.A. Executive Director Tim Kaine. Franken smiles until he’s attacked from the air by Norm Coleman leaping from the roof of a car. Coleman slams Franken’s head into the driver’s side car window and shatters the glass. Kaine whaps Coleman with his briefcase. Newly hired American Patriots Leader Eric Cantor flies in and tackles Kaine.

PCW Security Director Dawn McGill arrives on scene and throws Coleman to the ground. Cantor gets in her face and receives a four inch stiletto heel to the groin from McGill.

Back inside, PCW CEO Barack Obama is in the ring and furious at Coleman’s attack. Obama gets ready to lay down the law when PCW Owner Bubba Jackson makes a surprise appearance. Jackson takes the microphone and states he’s tired of Coleman and Franken dragging this on and on and on. Jackson: “I could make a ruling on Coleman’s appeal to me but I think I have a better idea. Next week on PCW on P-SPAN, we will have in our main event Norm Coleman of the American Patriots versus Al Franken of the Progressive Alliance to settle their differences once and for all in a Hardcore Barbed Wire Deathmatch!”

————-

Match #2 Cadillac (Domination Inc.) vs. Richard Headd of Guys With Unfortunate First Names Given Their Last Name (Dr. Bill’s Island of Misfit Wrestlers)- no match. Jaguar immediately attacks Headd before the bell. Dr. Bill and the rest of the Island of Misfit Wrestlers run in to help but Dr. Bill holds SNAFU back and then the pair leave. Domination Inc. hits the ring en force and destroy the Island of Misfit Wrestlers before PCW Security Director Dawn McGill makes her third appearance of the night to chase them off.

Backstage, PCW Investigative Reporter Woodward Bernstein asks Dr. Bill why he turned his back on the Island of Misfit Wrestlers. Dr. Bill’s response: “Failure is no accident. You cannot be who and what you are unless you have a lifestyle, both internally and externally, that is designed to support that definition of self. I tried to raise up the Island of Misfit Wrestlers. I did the best I could. But in the end, a defining moment is much like a burn. If you lean up against a hot stove, in less than a second the event is over. But the pain can last for weeks, months. The Island of Misfit Wrestlers have to learn from these tough moments and it will make them better.” Dr. Bill then added that he wants to refocus his energies on making SNAFU the next PCW Television Champion.

————-

Nancy Pelosi of the Progressive Alliance and the president of the PCW Competition Committee walks to the ring and calls out PCW Women’s Champion ‘Extreme Political TV’ Tessa Martin. Tessa comes out to the ring.

A quick review of Pelosi’s statement from Friday’s PCW Newsline:

NANCY PELOSI (Progressive Alliance) CALLS THE AMERICAN HEARTLAND COALITION ‘EXTREMISTS’
“After PCW Women’s Champion ‘Extreme Pizza Delivery Girl’ Tessa Martin and the newly minted American Heartland Coalition disrupted Nancy Pelosi’s grand plan to punish Blue Dog D and RINO-Republican in Name Only for locking the Angry Left Wing Bloggers in a room and make them listen to music from Barney the Dinosaur, Pelosi had this to say about the group’s effort: “This initiative is funded by the high end; we call it AstroTurf, it’s not really a grass-roots movement. It’s AstroTurf by some of the wealthiest people in America to keep the focus on tax cuts for the rich instead of for the great middle class.”

When asked to expound on her comments: Pelosi’s lieutenants passed out a document that stated that the American Heartland Coalition wasn’t ‘all about average citizens.’ The document goes on to accuse the AHC of harboring extremist elements such as sucessionists and racists, pointing out the ‘Raving Rednecks’ Locke and Loade as one example.

For her part, Tessa Martin would not dignify Ms. Pelosi’s remark with a response. Martin’s only statement was that she would respond in kind in the ring Sunday night on PCW on P-SPAN.”

Pelosi tells her that the PCW Competition Committee voted to make her defend the PCW Women’s title tonight in a three-way dance against Emily List and Code Pink of the Progressive Alliance. Tessa: “You’re no better than the American Patriots or Domination Inc. Bring it on, bitch.”

Main Event for the PCW Women’s Title: ‘Extreme Pizza Delivery Girl’ Tessa Martin (American Heartland Coalition) vs. Emily List (Progressive Alliance) vs. Code Pink (Progressive Alliance)
Emily List and Code Pink doubleteam Tessa and the match quickly becomes a two on one beatdown. A double pin attempt gets broken up by American Heartland Coalition member Tequila Sheila. Then, Kathryn Randall Collins (Progressive Alliance) hits the ring and it becomes a three on two beatdown. Another pin attempt- another run-in. This time, it’s Politically Incorrect- Princess of Political Incorrectness Andrea Doria with Al Cahall and Nic Koteen who makes the save.

Pelosi climbs into the ring with a steel folding chair and sneaks behind Tessa. Tessa turns around and sees her. KRC rushes at the Extreme Pizza Delivery Girl, Tessa sidesteps KRC’s charge and Pelosi gets crunched in the corner. This brings out both the Angry Left Wing Bloggers (Daily Kos, Media Matters, Eric Alterman, and Paul Krugman) and Domination Inc. But before either group can make it to the ring, they end up brawling outside the ring with each other. In the chaos, Tessa Pizza Cutters Emily List and grabs the pin.

Winner and still PCW Women’s Champion: ‘Extreme Pizza Delivery Girl’ Tessa Martin

Post match: Andrea Doria gets on the microphone and announces that Politically Incorrect will join the American Heartland Coalition.

Then a shocking sight, former Domination Inc. member Daisy Cutter-Bomb (also former member of the Three Amigas with Tessa Martin and Tequila Sheila ) sheepishly walks out to the ring. A replay is shown of Daisy being kicked out of Domination Inc. last week. Another replay is shown of Daisy turning on Tessa last year and helping Kathryn Randall Collins become the number one contender for the PCW Women’s Title.

Daisy asks if she can also join the American Heartland Coalition. Tessa and Tequila Sheila both just look upon her in disgust and walk away.

————-

Other stories about:
Al Franken and Norm Coleman: CNN, PA Pundits, Broadcatching, Underground Conservative, ZZZlist, Past in Print Weblog, Trader Aaron’s Weblog, Thanks for Participating, Ribbie’s Weblog, The Zoo, Half Ninja, Noelism Wisdom,

Nancy Pelosi: Emails to the President, Wonderland Wire, Howie Rich’s Blog, Roger Hollander, American Catholic, Democratic-Socialist Views,

Huffington Post, ..   ..

Domination Inc. Press Release, Pelosi Calls American Heartland Coalition ‘Extremists’-4/17 PCW Newsline

Hey y’all. Gina Ramsey here with another PCW Newsline.  It’s been another eventful week here at Political Championship Wrestling. Domination Inc. sent out a press release yesterday in the aftermath of Wednesday night’s show. We also have comments made by Nancy Pelosi about the newly formed American Heartland Coalition and a whole lot more so let’s get down to business.

——————————————–
4/15-PCW Extreme Political TV Results:
-The Angry Left Wing Bloggers (Daily Kos, Media Matters, Eric Alterman, Jane Hamsher w/Keith Olbermann, ‘Hardball’ Chris Matthews, Arianna Huffington, Rachel Maddow, and Ed Shultz vs. RINO-Republican in Name Only and Blue Dog D match went to no decision when ‘Extreme Pizza Delivery Girl’ Tessa Martin and the American Heartland Coalition intervened.
*
-Domination Inc. CFO Gordon Guyko throws a fit in the Domination Inc. Suite when he finds out about the five new wrestlers ‘Sports Entertainment Genius’ Mr. McMann has brought in. He tells McMann that he has to let go two wrestlers and that if this doesn’t work, ‘we’re cooked.’
*
-Jack Schett and Bull Schett (Progressive Alliance) easily dispatch the team of Jimmy from So Cal and Dread Pirate Douggie (The Island of Misfit Wrestlers) with the ‘Schett-brick.’
*
-Al Franken (Progressive Alliance) comes out and calls out Norm Coleman (American Patriots). Franken tells him that he should drop his appeals of the result from 12/18 PCW Completely Deranged. Coleman tells Franken he’s taking this all the way to the top. Both men then brawl.
*
-PCW TV Champion ‘No Frills’ Chris Escondido def. Tax Guy H.R. Block. Post match, Escondido is attacked by Domination Inc. Mercedes and Porsche Lexus turn on Daisy Cutter-Bomb and Mia Margarita and unceremoniously kick them out of Domination Inc.
————————————-
DOMINATION INC. PRESS RELEASE
Domination Inc. announces the hiring of five new wrestlers to its stable: Cadillac, Jaguar, Big Monster Whalie, Mercedes, and Porsche Lexus. All five wrestlers debuted last Sunday night during the PCW on P-SPAN show and already have made a huge difference in reestablishing Domination Inc. as the ultimate corporate force in PCW.

Domination Inc. CEO ‘THE Sports Entertainment Genius’ Mr. McMann commented: “The addition of Big Monster Whalie aka BMW, Cadillac, Jaguar, Mercedes, and Porsche Lexus will jump start our efforts to takeover Political Championship Wrestling and remake it in my image. We have already shown that the PCW Champion O’Beck Bahama is no match for our Big Monster and I’m very confident that the PCW Title will shortly be in the Domination Inc. stable. Cadillac and Jaguar are capable wrestler who will help Domination Inc. with our bottom line. Mercedes and Porsche Lexus will allow Domination Inc. to reenter the PCW Women’s title chase and bring the title back to us.”

CFO Gordon Guyko adds: “This move will maneuver Domination Inc. back to the top of PCW and is money well spent. Our goals are simple: Domination Inc. will control all four PCW title belts by PCW Loose Cannons Unleashed 5 on June 7th. With the addition of BMW, Cadillac, Jaguar, Mercedes, and Porsche Lexus to Domination Inc., I am quite confident we will hit our target objective.

 

Domination Inc. also announces the formal releases of Daisy Cutter-Bomb, and Mia Margarita. Mr. McMann says: “Unfortunately, both women were not performing up to standard in reaching our corporate objectives. We wish them well in their future endeavors.”

About Domination Inc.: Domination Inc. is a consortium of wrestlers dedicated to making the group the elite in Political Championship Wrestling. Our mission statement is simple: Domination Inc. will facilitate the takeover of PCW by any and all means available to us.
——————————-
NANCY PELOSI (Progressive Alliance) CALLS THE AMERICAN HEARTLAND COALITION ‘EXTREMISTS’
After PCW Women’s Champion ‘Extreme Pizza Delivery Girl’ Tessa Martin and the newly minted American Heartland Coalition disrupted Nancy Pelosi’s grand plan to punish Blue Dog D and RINO-Republican in Name Only for locking the Angry Left Wing Bloggers in a room and make them listen to music from Barney the Dinosaur, Pelosi had this to say about the group’s effort: “This initiative is funded by the high end; we call it AstroTurf, it’s not really a grass-roots movement. It’s AstroTurf by some of the wealthiest people in America to keep the focus on tax cuts for the rich instead of for the great middle class.”
*
When asked to expound on her comments: Pelosi’s lieutenants passed out a document that stated that the American Heartland Coalition wasn’t ‘all about average citizens.’ The document goes on to accuse the AHC of harboring extremist elements such as sucessionists and racists, pointing out the ‘Raving Rednecks’ Locke and Loade as one example.
*
For her part, Tessa Martin would not dignify Ms. Pelosi’s remark with a response. Martin’s only statement was that she would respond in kind in the ring Sunday night on PCW on P-SPAN.
———————————–
OTHER NEWS:
*
Joe SixPacks have been renamed the American Heartland Coalition.
McCain’s Marauders have been absorbed back into the American Patriots.
——————————–
UPCOMING EVENTS:
4/19- PCW on P-SPAN
4/22- PCW Extreme Political TV
4/24- PCW Newsline
4/26- PCW on P-SPAN
4/29- PCW Extreme Political TV
5/1- PCW Newsline
5/3- PCW on P-SPAN
5/6- PCW Extreme Political TV
5/8- PCW Newsline

Tax Guy, Al Franken and Norm Coleman, Nancy Pelosi vs. American Heartland Coalition- 4/15 PCW Extreme Political TV

4/15-PCW EXTREME POLITICAL TV from Anderson, Indiana
HOSTS: Johnny Suave and his life size cardboard cut-out of Shania Twain

Crowd chants ‘PCW!…PCW!’ Suave: “HELLO AND WELCOME TO P-C-W!” Suave pauses for the roar of the crowd. Suave: “I AM JOHNNY SUAVE! THIS HOT PIECE OF CARDBOARD IS SHANIA TWAIN. WELCOME TO ANOTHER EDITION OF PCW EXTREME POLITICAL TV! BEFORE WE GET TO TONIGHT’S MATCHES, LET’S REVIEW WHAT HAPPENED SUNDAY NIGHT ON PCW ON P-SPAN…”

4/12-PCW on P-SPAN Results
-Halitosis- The Luchador with the Insanely Foul Breath def. Little Paulie of the American Bikers in a battle of Independents

-Al Franken (Progressive Alliance) and Norm Coleman (American Patriots) brawled again

-Outside interference on the part of the Right Wing Brigadiers who were upset about being left out of the match and Lou Dobbs and Tucker Carlson caused the Angry Left Wing Bloggers/RINO- Republican in Name Only and Blue Dog D to go to a no-decision.

-Kalee Jones- The Eskimo Queen and newcomer ‘Texas Cowgirl’ Haley Dallas (SarahPAC) def. Emily List and Code Pink (Progressive Alliance)

-The Schett Brothers cut a promo and promise to regain the PCW Tag Team belts soon.

-PCW Champion O’Beck Bahama (Progressive Alliance) def. Dread Pirate Douggie (Dr. Bill’s Island of Misfit Wrestlers). Bahama got laid out after the match by Big Monster Wahlie, Cadillac and Jaguar, and Mercedes and Porsche Lexus- all five newcomers to the Domination Inc. stable. ‘Sports Entertainment Genius’ Mr. McMann then said:

McMann: “I made the mistake of thinking small. Now, I’m thinking much bigger. Power. Strength. And overwhelming force. You probably thought that after PCW Weapons of Mass Political Destruction that our hostile takeover of Political Championship Wrestling was dead. I can assure you that we’ve only just begun.”
*
Suave: “We’re about ready and-” Female: “WAIT A MINUTE! WAAAAAIT A MINUTE!” Suave: “Hold on. That’s Nancy Pelosi and she’s headed for the ring!” Pelosi walks quickly and climbs in the ring. Pelosi: “WAIT A MINUTE! We’ve got some unfinished business from Sunday night. If you remember, I decreed that because of RINO and Blue Dog D’s actions in trapping the Angry Left Wing Bloggers in a room and making them listen to Barney songs all night, that they would face them in a tag team handicap match- four against two. I did not authorize the Right Wing Brigadiers to interfere in the match. And I certainly did not authorize Lou Dobbs and Tucker Carlson to come to RINO and Blue Dog D’s aid. So here’s how it’s going down tonight. It’s another handicap tag team match between the Angry Left Wing Bloggers and RINO and Blue Dog D. If anyone from the Right Wing Brigadiers interferes in the match, they’ll be suspended from PCW. If Lou Dobbs and Tucker Carlson interferes in the match, they’ll be suspended from PCW, too.” Crowd: “BULL-####!…BULL-####!” Pelosi: “I’m doing this because I can. We control PCW now. Deal with it.”

Suave: “Okay. She’s doing this because she can and I’m dealing with it. The Angry Left Wing Bloggers versus RINO- Republican in name only and Blue Dog D.”

MATCH #1
ANGRY LEFT WING BLOGGERS Daily Kos, Media Matters for America, Eric Alterman, and Jane Hamsher (Progressive Alliance) vs.
BLUE DOG D (Progressive Alliance) and RINO- Republican in Name Only (American Patriots)
Suave: “There’s the bell and…WAIT A MINUTE! HERE COMES KEITH OLBERMANN, ‘HARDBALL’ CHRIS MATTHEWS, RACHEL MADDOW, ARIANNA HUFFINGTON, AND ED SHULTZ!” Olbermann, Matthews, Maddow, and Shultz hit the ring and join in the mugging. Pelosi nods her approval. Suave: “IT’S EIGHT ON TWO AND THERE’S NOTHING BLUE DOG D AND RINO CAN DO!” Daily Kos slides from the ring and pulls out two tables. He throws them into the ring and Media Matters sets them up. Suave: “THEY’RE GOING TO PUT THEM THROUGHT THE TABLES! MATTHEWS DRAPES RINO ACROSS THE TABLE. OLBERMANN THROWS BLUE DOG D ON THE OTHER.” The crowd noise suddenly increases. Suave: “WAIT A SEC…IT’S JOE SIXPACK!” PCW Women’s Champion ‘Extreme Pizza Delivery Girl’ Tessa Martin leads the Joe SixPacks group out.
Suave: “AMERICAN TRUCKER. AVERAGE JOE. THE RAVING REDNECK’S LOCKE AND LOADE! DAVE THE MECHANIC! TEQUILA SHEILA! THEY’RE ALL TAKING IT TO THE LEFT WING BLOGGERS!” Tessa takes Jane Hamsher out with a Pizza Box (with road sign inside) shot to the head. Suave: “TESSA HAS ARIANNA AND RACHEL MADDOW! *BONK* SHE JUST SLAMMED THEIR HEADS TOGETHER. PIZZA CUTTER ON ARIANNA! PIZZA CUTTER ON MADDOW! THE RAVING REDNECKS HAVE OLBERMANN SET…4-D REDNECK DEATH BLAST! NOW HERE’S DAVE THE MECHANIC…HE DROP KICKS CHRIS MATTHEWS OVER THE TOP ROPE! WOW!” The other Angry Left Wing Bloggers slide out of the ring. Suave: “PELOSI IS PISSED AND SHE’S POINTING AT JOE SIXPACKS!”

WINNER: NO MATCH

Tessa: “Hey, Nancy. On behalf of the American Heartland Coalition, I’d like to say a few words. You come out here and act as if you’re all powerful. The last time I checked, PCW’s Owner, Bubba Jackson, chose Barack Obama to the PCW CEO- not you.” The crowd cheers. Pelosi glares at the ‘Extreme Pizza Delivery Girl’. Tessa: “Under your watch, Domination Inc. has been allowed to run wild over PCW. While you’re busy trying to appease your power base, we’re the ones out here who’ve been assaulted and injured by a huge corporate group that only cares about one thing- control. I think that the PCW Competition Committee would benefit greatly if one of the members came from…well?…how about the American Heartland Coalition?” Suave: “So now! Joe SixPacks is now the American Heartland Coalition. And Nancy Pelosi doesn’t like what’s happened here one bit.”

DOMINATION INC. SUITE
Domination Inc. CEO ‘Sports Entertainment Genius’ Mr. McMann and CFO Gordon Guyko meet in Gordon’s office. Guyko: “I’m going to make this clear. I can’t believe you went out and spent what little capital we had left on FIVE NEW WRESTLERS! We only lost TWO! What are you thinking? And what are our backers going to say when they find out?” McMann: “Gordon, relax. This is just a mid-course correction. The other PCW defectors didn’t work out. We needed new blood and I felt it was necessary to bring in outside talent who fit our profile.” Guyko: “You had better be right or else we’re cooked.” McMann: “Gordon, we’re on track. Sunday night, we made a statement. Tonight, we’re going to do the same.” Guyko: “Fine. However, the bottom line here is that you need to cut two wrestlers before the end of tonight’s show.” McMann: “Two?” Guyko: “Two. We can’t function with an inflated payroll. Cut the dead wood tonight. And I want to see all four PCW titles on our mantle by June 7th- the PCW Loose Cannons Unleashed 5 event. Do we have an understanding?” McMann: “Yes, we do.”

MATCH #2
JACK SCHETT and BULL SCHETT w/Horst Schett and Hans Gruber- the Extreme German Schnauzer (Progressive Alliance) vs.
JIMMY FROM SO CAL and DREAD PIRATE DOUGGIE (The Island of Misfit Wrestlers)
Suave:
“Jack and Bull Schett continue their quest to regain the PCW Tag Team Titles. Jack Schett and Jimmy from So-Cal to start. There’s the bell and they lock up. Test of strength. No brainer there. Jack is too overpowering for Jimmy from So Cal. Neckbreaker by Jack Schett. Irish whip into the ropes. Nasty lariat by Jack and Jimmy from So Cal hit the canvas hard. Leg drop. Jack lifts him up…GUTBUSTER…INTO A STO! The referee checks on Jimmy…and Jimmy slips out of the hold. Jimmy tags in Dread Pirate Douggie.” Jack tags in Bull.

Suave: “Bull and Douggie circle the ring. Douggie charges. OOH. Kneelift by Bull catches him coming in. Belly to belly suplex on the wayyy…yes! Beautiful execution by Bull Schett. He’s got him up again…BRAINBUSTER! HERE WE GO! JACK HANDS BULL A BRICK AND HE PUTS IT IN THE BACK OF HIS TRUNKS! BULL CLIMBS TO THE TOP ROPE. YES! SCHETT-BRICK! SCHETT-BRICK! COVER. ONE. TWO. THREE.

WINNER: JACK SCHETT and BULL SCHETT

Suave: “The Schetts continue to claw their way back up to the top of the PCW Tag Team rankings. More PCW Extreme Political TV, after this…”

COMMERCIAL TIME:
For all the scoop on Political Championship Wrestling and other great e-wrestling federations out there on the internet, check out The E-Wrestling Magazine. Ben Halkum does a great job of highlighting various e-wrestling federations and E-Wrestling Magazine is one of the most interactives sites you will find.

Also check out the Titan Zone as well.

——–

The road to No Recovery continued last week as BWE Promotion’s Asian Invasion Tour hit the Pynk Candy Arena in Kuching, Malaysia! For the first time ever, BWE Heavyweight Champion Mo Morrissey teamed up with No. 1 contender Mojomike to take on The Sporting Blog members Chris Littman & Spencer Hall! Philly The Kid debuted and got his wish of facing The Blog Stalker in a DND match! Plus, two Money in the Blog qualifying matches and much, much more!

Check out our good friend David Funk and BWE Throwdown! – April 7, 2009 at Basic Blogonomics.com.

Suave: “Well, Al Franken’s in the ring and has something to say. If you’ve been following the whole Franken-Norm Coleman situation, they were together to accept an award last week for the best feud in PCW for 2008. As if on cue, Franken and Coleman scuffled at the dias and the feud seems to have fired back up. Let’s see what Al has to say.” Franken: “Okay. This week, Norm Coleman’s umpteenth appeal of the decision made by the full PCW Competition Committee to award me, Al Franken, the win of our December 18th match at PCW Competely Deranged was turned down again. Let’s see the tape of what happened and what really happened…”

REPLAY FROM 12/18 PCW COMPLETELY DERANGED: ENDING OF AL FRANKEN/NORM COLEMAN MATCH
Franken crawls back into the ring. Suave: “Franken can’t even stand up.” Coleman also crawls back to the ring. Franken reaches the ladder. Coleman crawls into the ring. Suave: “Franken’s going up. But Coleman is right behind him.” Franken’s about two rungs ahead of Coleman as both climb up opposite sides of the ladder. Franken reaches the top rung first. Coleman’s close enough to where he can start swinging at Franken. Both men try to push each other off the ladder. Franken stands and grabs for the briefcase. Coleman stands and he tries to reach the briefcase. Both latch on to the briefcase at the same time. The ladder suddenly becomes unbalanced. Both Franken and Coleman try to push the other off. Both grab at the briefcase. Lamb: “Isn’t it dangerous for two men to climb up a ladder to try to grab an object suspended in the air?” Suave: “Yes. That’s why you don’t see many ladder- HOLY CRAP! THE LADDER’S FALLING…RIGHT FOR US! BRIAN GET OUT OF THE WAY!” Lamb: “Huh? What?”

Crowd: “HOLY ****!…HOLY ****!…HOLY ****!…“HOLY ****!…HOLY ****!…HOLY ****!…HOLY…PCW!…PCW!…PCW!…PCW!…PCW!…” Suave: “Am I on…hello…okay…THE LADDER TIPPED OVER. FRANKEN AND COLEMAN FOUGHT FOR POSSESSION OF THE BRIEFCASE AS THE LADDER FELL. THE BAD NEWS- THEY JUST DESTROYED THE ANNOUNCER’S TABLE. THE GOOD NEWS- SOMETHING SOFT BROKE THEIR FALL. THE BAD NEWS- BRIAN LAMB OF P-SPAN WAS THE SOFT THING THAT BROKE THEIR FALL. I DIDN’T SEE WHO HAD WHAT. THE REFEREE IS TRYING TO SORT THIS OUT. THE CROWD IS GOING ABSOLUTELY NUTS!…HUH?…OH…OKAY…THE REFEREE IS GOING TO ANNOUNCE THE WINNER…LET’S GO TO THE RING.” Referee: “Okay. This is what I saw. Norm Coleman had possession-” The crowd explodes. Pro-Coleman and Franken chants erupt. Suave: “COLEMAN HAS BEEN DECLARED THE WINNER! THE REFEREE SAW THAT HE HAD THE BRIEFCASE AND CALLED HIM THE WINNER! FRANKEN IS PISSED. HE IMMEDIATELY CONFRONTS THE REFEREE AND HE’S LIGHTING HIM UP! COLEMAN’S OUT OF HERE. HE TOOK THE BRIEFCASE AND LIMPED OUT OF THE CAGE AS QUICKLY AS HE COULD. WHAT? FRANKEN’S CLAIMING THAT HE HAD THE BRIEFCASE AT THE BOTTOM BUT COLEMAN TOOK IT AWAY WHEN THE REFEREE CAME!”

CELL PHONE CAMERA ACCOUNT
Coleman and Franken battle. They both grab the suitcase. The ladder becomes unstable and starts to fall. Both men wrestle in the air for possession of the briefcase. The ladder falls directly towards PCW Announcer Johnny Suave’s table. Suave and guest color analyst Brian Lamb from P-SPAN see the ladder falling. Suave dives out of the way. Lamb attempts to cushion the fall. The ladder stops at the ropes and both Coleman and Franken go through the table. Franken clearly has possession of the briefcase. The referee slides out of the ring. Coleman snatches the briefcase away…

Franken: “So, the tape clearly shows that I, Al Franken, had the briefcase when we hit the ground and that Norm Coleman took the briefcase away from me, Al Franken, before the referee came around. Norm? I know you’re out there somewhere. It’s time to give it up. You’ve lost. I, Al Franken, have won.” Norm Coleman slowly walks towards the ring. Suave: “There he is. Norm Coleman. Will he finally give it up? What will he do? Let’s find out.” Coleman climbs in the ring. Coleman: “Al, this is not pro wrestling fast food. I’m taking this all the way to the top.” Franken: “What. You’re taking this to PCW Owner Bubba Jackson?” Coleman: “Yes.” Franken: “Norm, enough is enough. I, Al Franken, won. You lost.” Coleman: “Like hell I will.” Coleman lunges at Franken. Suave: “HERE WE GO AGAIN! FRANKEN AND COLEMAN ARE THROWING EVERYTHING BUT THE KITCHEN SINK AT EACH OTHER!” PCW Security Director Dawn McGill charges to the ring to break up the fracas.

UPCOMING EVENTS:
4/17- PCW Newsline
4/19- PCW on P-SPAN
4/22- PCW Extreme Political TV
4/24- PCW Newsline
4/26- PCW on P-SPAN
4/29- PCW Extreme Political TV
5/1- PCW Newsline
5/3- PCW on P-SPAN
5/6- PCW Extreme Political TV
5/8- PCW Newsline

MATCH #3
H.R. BLOCK (Tax Guy) vs.
PCW Television Champion ‘No Frills’ CHRIS ESCONDIDO (Progressive Alliance)
Suave:
“Oh, yeah. It’s tax day as you can hear the ‘nice’ reception H.R. Block is receiving.” The crowd boos him enthusiastically and throw 1040 forms into the ring. The bell sounds. Suave: “Block comes out. Escondido circles him. Block runs in. Drop toe hold. ANKLE LOCK! ANKLE LOCK! ANKLE LOCK! THAT’S IT. BLOCK TAPS OUT…BUT ESCONDIDO’S NOT BREAKING THE HOLD! Apparently, the PCW TV champ had to pay taxes this year instead of getting a refund. HE’S STILL NOT LETTING GO! HOLY CRAP! IT’S DOMINATION INC.! MERCEDES CLOCKS ESCONDIDO FROM BEHIND AND NOW JAGUAR IS KICKING AWAY AT THE TV CHAMP.” Boos ring in. Even H.R. Block gets into the act. Suave: “OH COME ON!” More boos. PCW Tag Team Champions Big Oil and Kirk Walstreit join in. Daisy Cutter-Bomb and ‘Shot at Scoring with a Slutty Video Channel Reality Star’ Mia Margarita also run down with Mercedes and Porsche Lexus. Suave: “THE WHOLE CORPORATION IS DOWN AT THE RING!”

Mercedes and Porsche Lexus look at each other. Then they hit simultaneous DDT’s on Daisy Cutter-Bomb and Mia Margarita. Suave: “HOLY CRAP! THEY’VE TURNED ON DAISY CUTTER-BOMB AND MIA!” Mercedes and Porsche stomp away at Daisy and Mia. Mr. McMann comes out with Corporate Enforcer Whiskey Tango Foxtrot and Rough Justice and approves. Suave: “DOMINATION INC. HAS FIRED DAISY CUTTER-BOMB AND MIA MARGARITA! CHRIS ESCONDIDO IS GETTING KILLED BY CADILLAC, JAGUAR, BIG OIL , AND KIRK WALSTREIT. WAIT! IT’S RAHM EMANUEL! F-BOMB ON CADILLAC! F-BOMB ON WALSTREIT! BIG OIL GRABS HIM BY THE THROAT! HE LIFTS HIM UP…CHOKESLAM!” Jaguar and Big Oil swarm all over Emanuel and lay the boots into him. Suave: “CAN DOMINATION INC. BE STOPPED? WE WILL SEE NEXT WEEK.”

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