MATCH #2- THREE WAY DANCE FOR THE VACANT PCW TELEVISION TITLE
Big Oil (R) w/Texas Tex and ‘The Wall Street Pro with the Man-Crush on ESPN’s Kirk Herbstreit’ Kirk Walstreit
‘The One Man Hollywood A-List’ Stone Chism w/The Skanky Rich Bimbos: Kim Carr-Skank-Sheehan, Courtney Carr-Skank-Sheehan, and Chloe Carr-Skank-Sheehan
Road Rage Randy (Triple R) w/The Angry Left Wing Bloggers: Professor Paul Krugman, Arianna Huffington, Markos Moultisas, and ‘FireDog Lake’ Jane Hamsher)
The bell rings and we’re off. Triple R and Chism surprisingly work together early and go to work on Big Oil. Big Oil rebounds and goes to work on Chism. Triple R takes an arm lock on Big Oil. Big Oil throws Chism to the side and then knocks down Triple R. Chism with a chairshot to the head and Big Oil goes to the floor. He’s bleeding from the forehead. Texas Tex is screaming loud. Chism tosses Triple R into the ringpost. Again. Chism rubs Triple R’s face along the ring ropes. Chism tosses Triple R like a dart into the ringpost. Chairshot to Triple R. Triple R is on his back with his head sticking out of the ring. Big Oil gets up and drops a elbow onto Triple R’s face. Big Oil beats down Triple R on the floor. Big Oil tosses him into the STEEEEEL steps. Professor Paul Krugman jumps on Big Oil’s back and tries to choke him. Big Oil flips him over and Krugman lands on the floor. Big Oil grabs him by his tie and pulls him into the steel steps several times. Krugman is broken open.
Suave: “You know, for a smart person that was an incredibly dumb thing to do.”
Triple R charges Big Oil. Big Oil lifts him into the air and slams Triple R into the ringpost. Big Oil stomps Triple R. Texas Tex gives him his golden money belt and Big Oil whips Triple R with it. Chism comes over and holds Triple R in place for a Big Oil chairshot. Horrified at the Democrat on Democrat violence, Pelosi, Reid, and Kaine rush over and try to talk Chism out of helping Big Oil. Meanwhile, Big Oil smashes the chair over and over again on Triple R. Then he turns on Chism and blasts him with a chairshot. Arianna, Hamsher, and Markos pep talk Triple R as he tries to peel himself off the floor. Into the ring, Triple R gets off the mat and smiles. Big Oil rolls back in and sets up Triple R up on the top rope. Superplex off the top rope. Big Oil covers. Triple R somehow kicks out.
Triple R with a low blow, and finally gets away from Big Oil. Chism is also back in the ring. He pushes Triple R into the corner. Chism goes top rope and flies onto Big Oil. He hooks the leg for 2. Big Oil snaps Chism’s neck across the top rope. Triple R from outside the ring runs and flies through the middle rope and hits Big Oil. Three-way brawling in the ring. Big Oil takes down Chism. Triple R picks up a chair and whacks Big Oil in the head. Big Oil now is bleeding profusely. Triple R hits another chairshot and gets right in Big Oil’s face taunting him. Chism pulls Triple R down and starts raining down punches on him. Chism sends Triple R across the ring and right into Big Oil’s big hand. Choke slam on the way to massive boos…Big Oil slams Triple R to the mat. Now, it’s Oklahoma Driller time. Pelosi and Reid plead for Chism to stop Big Oil. Chism ignores them and watches Big Oil plant Triple R with the Oklahoma Driller. Cover. 1…2…3.
ELIMINATED: Triple R (D)
The Angry Left Wing Bloggers are furious and complain to Pelosi and Reid. Chism fights up and gets clotheslined by Big Oil. Big Oil stalks Chism. Stomps by Big Oil. Big Oil pulls him to the mat with an arm drag. Big Oil’s face is still dripping blood. Big Oil lifts Chism up for the Oklahoma Driller, the three Carr-Skank-Sheehan girls hit the ring and whip off their tops.
Suave: “WARDROBE MALFUNCTION! WARDROBE MALFUNCTION!”
Big Oil hesitates! Chism escapes and whips Big Oil into the corner. Chism charges in for the splash, Big Oil gets a leg up. Big Oil sets up for another Oklahoma Driller, Chism backdrops out of it. DDT by Big Oil, cover for 2. Big Oil has the CRIMSON MASK going. Chism tries for the Hollywood Blockbuster. Big Oil backs him into the corner and shoulderblocks him a few times. Ten punch count along! Big Oil pulls Chism out of the corner, and hits the Oklahoma Driller on Chism. That’s it. Big Oil covers. 1…2…NO! WHO?
Sheen pulls the referee out of the ring and the crowd gasps. There is blood everywhere in the ring. Big Oil comes over and yells at Sheen. Chism with a chair…*WHAP!* Big Oil staggers. Here comes Walstreit into the ring. Chism reverses, and then tosses Walstreit onto his back. *WHAP!* Another chairshot to Big Oil. Chism goes for the Hollywood Blockbuster…and he hits it!
Suave: “HOLY CRAP!”
WINNER AND NEW PCW TELEVISION CHAMPION: ‘The One Man Hollywood A-List’ Stone Chism (D) @ 15:35
Charlie Sheen jumps into the ring and celebrates with Chism and the topless Skanky Rich Bimbos.
Suave: “WHAT A MATCH! AND CHARLIE ‘FREAKIN’ SHEEN HELPS GET CHISM OVER!”
Filed under: 2012 Election, Average Joe, Barack Obama, Blogs- Pro Wrestling, democrats, Independents, joe six pack, Joe the Plumber, Paul Heyman, political satire, political wrestling, Politics, Pro Wrestling, red state, republicans, Small Town America, Third Party, wordpress political blogs Tagged: | Charlie Sheen, Harry Reid, Nancy Pelosi, Paul Krugman