No PCW Extreme Political TV tonight. PCW goes back into the vaults and pulls out some old matches from the archives. Enjoy.
From October 26th, 2006 PCW Extreme Political TV
Rush Limbaugh segment.
The crowd boos as the Alice in Chains hit “Man In the Box” blares over the loudspeaker. “Here comes the Innovator of Extreme Excellence in Broadcasting,” Suave says, “what is that? The I-E-E-I-B network?”
“Ox-y-con-tin!” they chant and clap.
“That’s right,” Limbaugh says, “it is I. El Rushbo. The maha-rushbie. With talent on loan from God!”
“Well you better give it back to him,” Suave cracks, “because you sure as hell ain’t using it.”
Limbaugh comes out to address the whole issue of Michael J. Fox. Rush asks
if everyone’s seen the commercial. He then mimics Fox’s restless torso weaves
and writhes, and head bobs from side to side on the commercial. “A**hole!” the
crowd chants in response. “He is exaggerating the effects of his disease,” Limbaugh claims, “He’s moving all around and shaking and it’s purely an act.”
More boos rain in. “This is low, even for the Innovator of Extreme Excellence in
Broadcasting,” Suave opines, he’s mocking someone with Parkinson’s Disease.”
“Michael J. Fox has never portrayed any of the symptoms of the disease like this. He can barely control himself,” Limbaugh says. He again makes fun of Fox’s ‘funky movement’ thing.
The crowd goes nuts when Michael J. Fox comes out. He’s not moving nearly as much as on the commercial. “It’s ironic, given some of the things that have been said, that my pills are working really well right now,” he says in response. Fox tells Limbaugh this isn’t about politics; it’s about stem cell research.
“You’re allowing your illness to be exploited by shilling for the Democrats,” Limbaugh responds.
Fox again tells him he’s not acting and he’s advocating stem cell research.
Limbaugh repeats his assertions that he’s being used by the Democrats.
Fox tells him he’s wrong and he’s being his usual bully self. The crowd cheers.
Limbaugh throws down the mic and dares Fox to come into the ring. “You want me, in the ring with you?” Fox asks. Limbaugh holds the rope down and dares him to come inside.
“Fine. You’re on,” Fox says, “we’ll meet later tonight.”
Limbaugh tells him to make sure he takes his meds before he comes back out. The crowd then chants ‘Oxycontin” again. “Shut up!” Limbaugh snaps…
Match #3- Rush Limbaugh (American Patriots) vs. Michael J.
Limbaugh comes out first to the ring. The crowd lets him have it big time. Loud boos and the ever-present “Oxycontin” chant.
“Well, the Innovator of Extreme Excellence in Broadcasting is in the ring,” Suave says. “We’re waiting for Michael J. Fox to come out.” A few more seconds go by and nothing.
Limbaugh grabs the mic. “Of course, he’s not coming out,” he says. “he’s just
pretending to be-” The crowd interrupts Limbaugh with a huge cheer. “What?”
Suave says, trying to see the action, “HOLY CRAP! IT’S THE PCW CHAMPION CHRIS ESCONDIDO!” Limbaugh’s cocky, haughty demeanor melts away when the PCW Champion comes to the ring. He quickly looks for a way out. “LIMBAUGH HAS NO WHERE TO RUN,” Suave says, “AND NO WHERE TO HIDE!”
Escondido takes the mic. “You know, Rush,” he says, “you talk a good game when it’s someone who probably isn’t in good enough condition to defend himself.” Escondido calls Limbaugh a bully and tells him to take his best shot. Rush gets cornered and tries to beg off. Escondido doesn’t buy it and lifts him up to give him a suplex. The crowd goes nuts. “HOLY CRAP!” Suave shouts out, “HE’S GOING TO DO IT! HE’S GOING TO-”
Out of nowhere, Justin Sufferable’s catch phrase “Not just intolerable. Not just
unbearable. I am Justin Sufferable!” plays over the sound system. Sufferable
then runs in and whacks the champion in the back with a Singapore cane.
Escondido drops Limbaugh on his back hard and then staggers into the corner.
“Sufferable’s trying to get a head start on BCEW Extreme Election Night!” Suave
says as Justin whacks Escondido repeatedly with the Singapore cane. “He wants
the PCW title badly!” Again the crowd noises rises. “HOLY CRAP! IT’S A. TOM
A. Tom Bomb (A-Bomb) hits the ring and power slams Sufferable. Then he power slams Chris Escondido. Then Sufferable again, this time bouncing him from the ring. A-Bomb looks to slam Escondido again but he slips under the ropes. A-Bomb looks down at Rush Limbaugh and grins. Limbaugh looks up at the hulking A-Bomb and gets a real bug-eyed, mouth open expression. He tries to leave but Hy Drogen Bomb blocks the way.
“Limbaugh’s stuck and he’s in a real bad place right now!” Suave observes. H-Bomb grabs a table from underneath and throws it in the ring. “HERE WE GO!” Suave says. H-Bomb climbs to the top rope. A-Bomb clubs Limbaugh and helps set him up. H-Bomb lifts up Limbaugh and powerbombs him through the table.
“HOLY CRAP!” Suave shouts.
From November 7, 2006- PCW Extreme Election Night 2006
MATCH #2- THREE WAY DANCE- JOE LIEBERMAN (Independent), NED LAMONT (Democrat), and ALAN SCHLESINGER (Republican)
“Yeah, I guess we’ll see just how ‘fair’ the night goes,” Suave cracks. Suave
starts into the next match. He recaps the first match up between Joe Lieberman
and Ned Lamont. The replay shows that Lieberman and Lamont have been through a war. As Lamont goes for a spear, Lieberman trips him up with a drop toe hold and locks on the abdominal stretch. The Bloggers then make a move to intervene. Behind Lieberman, Daily Kos slips in the ring wearing brass knuckles. Eric Alterman and Media Matters distracts Lieberman and Daily Kos nails him with the brass knucks. Media Matters rolls Lieberman over and points Lamont to make the cover.
“All right, the Left Wing Bloggers Daily Kos, Media Matters for America, and Eric Alterman were the difference the last time Lieberman and Lamont met up,” explained Suave. “This time, Alan Schlesinger may be the wild card of the group.”
The bell rings and immediately the Bloggers pile into the ring and attack Lieberman. Schlesinger joins in. “HOLY CRAP! IT’S FIVE AGAINST ONE!” Suave says as the referee is powerless to prevent the outside interference.
Lieberman is whipped into the ropes and Daily Kos and Media Matters set to double team him. Lieberman clotheslines the two bloggers but then gets blindsided by Eric Alterman.
The Bomb Brothers (A. Tom Bomb, Hy Drogen Bomb, and Newt Tron Bomb) run out. “HERE THEY COME!” Suave says as the crowd stands up and cheers, “THE ODDS HAVE JUST BEEN EVENED UP!”
A-Bomb power slams Eric Alterman. H-Bomb lifts Daily Kos in the air and tosses him over the top rope through a ringside table. “HOLY CRAP!” Suave says as Daily Kos is buried amongst the remains of the table.
“PCW!…PCW!” chants the crowd. A-Bomb corners Alan Schlesinger. Schlesinger desperately calls out to the Republicans in the back for help. As A-Bomb lifts him up and Newt Tron Bomb sets a table up in the ring, Schlesinger calls out for Dick, or The Mastermind Karl Rove, or even the Rookie Sensation Starz N. Stripes. No help arrives and A-Bomb Atomic Powerbombs Schlesinger through the table. Lieberman covers and Schlesinger is eliminated.
The crowd serenades Schlesinger with the ‘na, na. hey-hey-hey goodbye’ song.
H-Bomb decks Media Matters and then climbs out of the ring. He grabs Media Matters’s legs and crotches him on the ringpost. H-Bomb then rolls him out of the ring.
“IT’S DOWN TO LIEBERMAN AND LAMONT NOW!” Suave says. “Now we’ll find out just what Lamont is made of.”
Lamont appears unsure and turns around looking for help. He calls for The American Screamer Howard Dean, “The Natural” Barack Obama, or anyone else from the Democratic side to come help him. Like Schlesinger, no help arrives. “I think its safe to say that the ‘Joe-mentum’ is on Lieberman’s side now,” Suave says. Suddenly, another left wing blogger, Arianna Huffington, shrieks down the aisle towards the ring to help Lamont and runs into the manager of the Bomb Brothers Daisy Cutter-Bomb. Daisy lays her out with a wicked clothesline. Lieberman stomps his foot three times and sets him up for his closer.
LIEBERMAN’S GOING FOR THE ‘JOE-STOPPER!” Suave says.
Lamont turns around just in time to catch a superkick right to his chin. “That’s a pretty good kick for an old guy,” Suave cracks. “I didn’t think he could get his leg that high.” Lamont drops as if he’s been shot. Lieberman covers and that’s the match.
WINNER: JOE LIEBERMAN (I)
Huffington throws a fit and stomps around at ringside as Joe holds up his hand in victory.
Also from PCW Extreme Election Night 2006:
MATCH #4- BCEW TAG TEAM TITLE MATCH- PEACENIK #1 & 2 of the Green World Order (Democrat) vs. DRUNKEN LUCHADORS DAN & DON- THE FLYIN’ MARTINI BROTHERS (Independent)
Extreme attorneys Felcher and Felcher joins Johnny Suave at ringside. “Swell,”
he mumbles. Immediately Peacenik #1 complains about the Martini Brothers
drinking in the ring. Both Martini Brothers chug a bottle of Jack Daniels and
then break the bottle over their heads. “Yes, it’s a little unorthodox,” Suave
explains, “but hell, they’re the champions. They can do whatever they
Peacenik #1 and Don Martini to begin. Crowd chants for the Drunken Luchadors. A brief lock up and an attempted knee by Peacenik #1 that whiffs
because Don staggers out of the way. Peacenik #1 tries rights now, and then the
boots…and misses again. “Here we go again,” Suave says.
R Felcher yells at Don Martini to stand still.
Suave shoots back, “Yeah, easier said than done.”
Peacenik #1 gets frustrated and rushes at Don. He clips the Drunken Luchador and sends him to the canvas. The Felchers cheer at the announcer’s table. Peacenik #1 goes for a leg drop but Dan Martini pulls Don out of the way.
Apparently Dan is the more sober one tonight,” observes Suave.
A tag is made and Dan Martini gets into the ring. Peacenik #1 again tries to bull over Dan. Dan topples to the canvas and Peacenik #1 rams into the corner ringpost.
“Of course, I could be wrong,” Suave says.
Peacenik #1 staggers back to his corner and tags in Peacenik #2.
Dan Martini climbs to the top rope. Suave cringes. “Oooh, this can’t be a good thing.”
Peacenik #2 simply waits. Dan leaps off the top rope and misses Peacenik #2 completely. “Definitely, not a good thing,” Suave says as Peacenik #2 goes for the cover but somehow Dan kicks out. “In the interest of fairness, he should have let the Green World Order pin him,” whines R Felcher.
“Yes,” chimes in B Felcher. “Haven’t they been tag team champions long enough?”
The other two members of the Green World Order, The Vengeful Vegan Brock Cole Lee and Peta from PETA come down to the ring. Brock Cole Lee slips a bottle of chloroform and a handkerchief to Peacenik #1. “Now what are they up to!” asks Suave. “Justice!” offers R Felcher. “That bottle of chloroform represents justice for the Green World Order.”
Peacenik #1 motions #2 to throw Dan Martini into their corner. Peacenik #2 tries to lift the Drunken Luchador up- he’s dead weight. Finally, Brock Cole Lee interjects himself into the match and helps Peacenik #2 drag Dan to their corner.
“It’s all over!” gloats R Felcher. D Felcher concurs, “There’s no way that-”
“HERE COME THE BOMB BROTHERS!” interrupts Suave, AND THE RAVING REDNECKS-LOCKE AND LOADE!”
Suave quickly recaps how Felcher and Felcher used the judicial system to deny the Bomb Brothers or the Raving Rednecks from wrestling for the tag team title.
“This is not acceptable!” R Felcher says.
A-Bomb tears Peacenik #1 off the edge of the ring and slams him into the steel barricade. The bottle of chloroform drops on the floor and Earl Locke picks it up. He immediately uses it on Peacenik #1 and takes him out. Gary Loade bulldogs Brock Cole Lee and then Locke and Loade deliver a devastating 4-D Redneck Death Blast to the Vengeful Vegan. Peacenik #2 ducks out of the ring but runs into H-Bomb.
“Oh, oh!” Suave warns.
Peacenik #2 immediately runs back into the ring and inadvertently elbows Dan Martini in the stomach. Dan starts to look green.
HOLY CRAP! HE’S GOING FOR THEIR FINISHER!”
Suave says as Peacenik #2 gets a real concerned look. “Someone stop him,” R
Felcher says. Too late. Dan spews green mist…no too chunky…projectile vomits all over Peacenik #2.
“WOW!” Suave exclaims. “He must have ate a lot for supper tonight!”
Dan passes out and headbutts Peacenik #2. Peacenik #2 down and covered
by Drunken Luchador Dan. 1-2-3. Match.
WINNER AND STILL BCEW TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS: THE DRUNKEN LUCHADORS, DAN AND DON- THE FLYING MARTINI BROTHERS
A-Bomb grabs R Felcher; Gary Loade grabs B Felcher. Both Felchers are dragged unceremoniously into the ring.
“It’s been nice knowing you guys,” Suave says, “NOT!”
Locke and Loade deliver another 4-D Redneck Death Blast to B Felcher while A-Bomb and H-Bomb double-power A-Bombs R Felcher.
“And that my friends,” Suave says, “is what I call a happy ending.”
We’ll be back with a new episode of PCW Extreme Political TV next Monday night.
Why I Won’t Support Ron Paul – Steve Fleisher
Shock and Awww, Not Again! – Nonnie 999/Hysterical Raisans
Trump And Huckabee Out, Who Benefits The Most? – Sensico
“Le Great seducer”, Frenchman Dominique assaults SOFITAL chamber maid in $3,000 a night penthouse suite?! - Pan Am
Some Thoughts on Life Post-Osama - Rutherford Lawson Blog
Burden Shifting Is the Mark of Tyranny – Taxes, Stupidity, and Death
Romney dials for dollars – CNN Political Ticker
Huckabee decision puts evangelical votes up for grabs – CNN Political Ticker
Was he ever serious? How Trump strung the country along, again – CNN Political Ticker
Nearly 20 percent of new Obamacare waivers are gourmet restaurants, nightclubs, fancy hotels in Nancy Pelosi’s district – Daily Caller
How alleged Tea Party fraud Jack Davis came to run as the ‘Tea Party’ candidate in NY’s 26th district special election – Daily Caller
Paul Ryan: Newt Gingrich Misunderstood Medicare Plan – Huffington Post
Obama Tries To Fire Up Frustrated Supporters Ahead Of 2012 – Huffington Post
Ari Melber: In Rap Battle, Stewart Demolishes O’Reilly on O’Reilly Factor – Huffington Post
Huckabee Booster in South Carolina Shifts Support to Huntsman – Roll Call
House Freshman Berg Will Run for Senate in North Dakota – Roll Call
The Job Nobody Wants: GOP’s Growing 2012 Dropout List – Daily Beast
Campaign Surrogates Pose Challenge for Obama – Political Wire
Romney Raises More Than $10 Million in a Day – Political Wire
McConnell sees ‘great opportunity’ – Politico Live
Please Do Not Google the Name of This Undervalued Republican Candidate – Swampland
Trump exit signals end to silly season – Politico Live
Charter Schools, Trump, Huckabee, and Newt #EERS – Red State
Mitt Romney’s Vegas Payoff: Raises $10.25M In Day-Long Phone-a-Thon – The Note, ABC
What President Obama is telling high school graduates this year: ‘Being president is a great job’ - LA Times- Top of the Ticket
Rush Limbaugh on Newt Gingrich’s attack on Paul Ryan: ‘I’m as befuddled as anyone else’ – LA Times- Top of the Ticket
Open thread for night owls: Wall Street Still A Nest Of Criminality – Daily Kos
Trump’s lesson – Ben Smith/Politico
The Rebuke in Dubuque: Gingrich’s Rocky Campaign Start Somehow Gets Even Rockier – Michelle Malkin
Charles Krauthammer On Newt Gingrich: ‘He’s Done, It’s Over’ – Mediaite
Jon Stewart To Bill O’Reilly: ‘There Is A Selective Outrage Machine Here At Fox’ – Mediaite
The Daily Wrap – Daily Dish
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