PCW Politics is War on P-SPAN- Hour 2
Thursday December 8th, 2011
Host: Johnny Suave
T-Roy and K-Roy (R) vs. The Green World Order: ‘Extreme Vegan’ Brock Cole Lee and GreenPete w/PeaceNick and Peta from PETA (D)
The Republicans new tag team get set to debut. But first, GreenPete gets on the mic to say a couple words. GreenPete quotes from an article in Germany‘s Der Spiegel magazine ‘the Republican race is dominated by ignorance, lies and scandals. The current crop of candidates for PCW CEO have shown such a basic lack of knowledge that they make George W. Bush look like Einstein. The Grand Old Party is ruining PCW’s reputation.’
GreenPete then calls T-Roy and K-Roy the poster children for the stupid, redneck, uncivilized rabble the Republicans attract. GreenPete protests the impending violence inside the ring while outside the ring with the Occupy Wall Street folks: Nate, Shane, and Adam.
T-Roy: Listen, are you here to wrassle or are you here to run your pie-hole all night long?”
Lee answers the question by tackling T-Roy and the match is on.
…K-Roy drops the elbow on GreenPete. Brock Cole Lee runs in, K-Roy tosses him into the corner. Nate from the OWS comes up behind K-Roy. He goes for the Occupation Obliteration but T-Roy slams a steel chair over Nate’s head. K-Roy stomps him a bit then sets up the table. Shane and Adam of the OWS in…T-Roy in with a chair and blasts Shane right into Adam. K-Roy then hits a K-Bomb through the table on GreenPete and that’s it…1…2…3.
WINNER: K-Roy and T-Roy (R) @ 15:09
Replay: PCW Extreme Political TV
American Airlines Flight Attendent defeated Alec Baldwin @ 7:22
-it all began with a flight attendant scolded Baldwin for playing ‘Word with Friends’ on his iPad while the airplane was at the gate. Baldwin then got up and demanded to know what her name was and it escalated from there.
Baldwin whips out his iPad and says: “I’m just so mad, I’m just going to…going to…” Then he feverishly types something on his iPad. “There! I guess I told you huh?”
Suave: “He just tweeted from the ring. How cool.”
Baldwin goes into a full fledged rant about Republicans and even notes that he changed his description on twitter to Conservative Christian, Gun Lover, Mom. He goes off on the Flight Attendent who ‘got the better of him’ Monday night and calls her someone who walks the aisles of an airplane with a whistle around their neck and a clipboard in their hands and they have made flying a Greyhound bus experience.’
Baldwin turns to leave but is interrupted by Greyhound CEO Dave Leach carrying a piece of luggage. Leach is unhappy over the actor’s Greyhound bus reference and lets him have it.
Leach: “First of all, we have hundreds of new buses in our fleet where we’ve added more legroom, leather seats, power outlets and free Wi-Fi,” Leach notes. “I think you especially would find the latter two amenities exciting, because we don’t require our customers to turn off their electronic devices…ever. You could therefore play Words With Friends® during your entire trip and nobody would give you any grief over it.”
Baldwin dismisses Leach and starts to climb out of the ring. Leach swings his luggage and blasts Baldwin in the back with it- causing the actor get himself hung up in the ropes.
Leach: “Should you still decide not to try us, even after I’ve shared with you all of the exciting changes we’ve made here at Greyhound, all I ask from you is a simple apology. We are not the same company we used to be … Greyhound is an American icon, a proud company that many people depend on to get them to their destinations, the same people who watch your films and TV show.”
Leach then cracks Baldwin again with the luggage and leaves.
California Teacher’s Union: ‘Foul Pole’ Andy Golatta and Malibu Dusty (D) w/Pet Governor Jerry Brown (D-CA) vs. Tommy Frick and Ralphie Fraack (I)
Golatta hits the ‘Foul Pole’ on Frick and this one’s quick and easy.
WINNER: California Teacher’s Union @ 1:11
In the business office, there’s a huge brouhaha about the night’s receipts. Jon Corzine is surrounded by PCW officials.
Corzine: “I simply do not know where the money is, or why the accounts have not been reconciled to date.”
Corzine added that he was “stunned” to learn that he could not account for the money. Then a cannonball blasted through the wall whizzed by Corzine’s head before exiting through another wall.
Suave: “What the f-”
Suave: “OHHHHHHH! It makes perfect sense now.”
Mythbuster Adam Savage enters the room. “Yeah, sorry about that.”
Separate shots of both Keith Olbermann (D) and ‘The Alaskan Pitbull’ Sarah Palin (R) entering the QWest Center earlier in the evening. Olbermann and Palin are ‘cover boy and girl’ for the upcoming Jesusland vs. Progressiveville novel due out next month.
MITT ROMNEY (R-MA) HEADQUARTERS
Supporter John Sununu (R-NH) bangs his fist on the table and says: ““The off-the-cuff comment, for example, that Gingrich throws out on occasion is a reflection on the off-the-cuff thinking that he goes through to deal with issues, and that is not what you want in a commander in chief.”
Romney tries to psych up his wrestler, ‘American Citizen’ Kevin Scott (R) before his big match against O’Beck Bahama (D).
Suave notes that Romney would like nothing more than to stem the big momentum swing in Newt Gingrich’s (R-GA) favor by having Scott knock off long time rival Bahama.
RON PAUL’S (R-TX) HEADQUARTERS
As Ron Paul also frets about Gingrich’s rise, Jack Schmidt (R) paces back and forth. Paul tries to think of some way to ‘expose’ Gingrich’s weaknesses.
O’Beck Bahama (D) vs. ‘American Citizen’ Kevin Scott (R) w/Mitt Romney (R-MA)
Both men have put on absolute top notch matches against each other over the past four years. This one is no exception. Bahama seems to be rounding back into form. Scott is as focused as ever. The match turns when…
…Jack Schmidt is out! He runs to the ring and he’s got a brick! Bahama has Scott set up for the Bahama Backbreaker. Schmidt climbs up the corner turnbuckle and puts the brick in the rear of his trunks.
Suave: “HE’S GOING TO TRY TO DROP A SCHMIDT-BRICK ON BAHAMA!”
Schmidt turns his back and jumps. Bahama whips Scott forward and Schmidt nearly takes his head off.
Suave: “HE MISSED. SCOTT GOT SCHMIDT-BRICKED INSTEAD!”
Scott out. Bahama makes the easy cover. 1…2…3.
WINNER: O’Beck Bahama (D)
Suave: So, the PCW Title Match at Jesusland vs. Progressiveville will be a three way dance between champion Daniel-San (I), Magnum P.O.’d (R), and former champion O’Beck Bahama (D). That’s all for this-”
‘The Alaskan Pitbull’ Sarah Palin, one half of the cover for the novel Jesusland vs. Progressiveville, is laid out on the floor unconscious.
Suave: “HOLY CRAP! SOMEONE TOOK OUT THE ALASKAN PITBULL! WHO DID IT? WE’LL FIND OUT NEXT WEEK.
Filed under: 2012 Election, Average Joe, Barack Obama, Blogs- Pro Wrestling, democrats, Independents, joe six pack, Joe the Plumber, Paul Heyman, political satire, political wrestling, Politics, Pro Wrestling, red state, republicans, Sarah Palin, Small Town America, Third Party | Tagged: Alec Baldwin, C-SPAN, George W. Bush, Jon Corzine, Keith Olbermann | Leave a Comment »