It's five years after the 2012 election and, well, things aren't going so well. A major economic meltdown exacerbates the already bitter divisions within the United States and the country has split into several smaller nations based on red and blue state populations- or Jesusland and Progressiveville.
Now, in 2017, former Presidents Clinton and Bush (43) convene the American Reconciliation Summit and attempt to reunite the fifty states into one country once again. But when a multi-national mega-corporation attempts to disrupt the reconciliation talks, Stacey Martin, Kate Wilson, and the Washington Freedom Force find themselves on the front line protecting Washington D.C. and the summit. With the future of a possible reconstituted United States in the balance, can Stacey and Kate stop the forces against reconciliation from undermining the summit? Or will the corporation make sure the talks suffer a cataclysmic, catastrophic failure of nuclear proportions.
Written by the irrepressible, onerous, and uber-mysterious Mr. A. Nominous, the book harpoons the American political dysfunction that's pulling our country apart and also pokes fun at various cultural icons ranging from Harry Potter to Les Miserables, Stars Wars to Armageddon to even the Twilight films.
Now available on Amazon.com, Amazon Kindle, Barnes and Noble, and other online book sellers.
Posted on September 25, 2011 by Political Championship Wrestling
PCW Lock and Load 6
Huntington Center Toledo, OH
Sunday September 25th, 2011
Host: Johnny Suave
Suave is NOT in the ring. But one-third of the Axis of Evil, Iran‘s Mahmoud Ahmadinejadis. Ahmadinejad rails against the West for a laundry list of ills throughout history including slavery, two world wars, and the global economic crisis. Ahmadinejad also criticizes the killing of Osama bin Laden, and suggests that the al-Qaeda leader could have been the star witness at a trial that would reveal the true culprits behind the attacks on New York and Washington. The crowd boos the sharply worded speech, accompanied by finger-wagging and dramatic hand gestures.
Suave then announces that he got the work from the back that they were walking out. So, while Ahmadinejad continues to talk, the crowd silently files out. Suave says the PPV will start over again in just a few moments…
PCW Lock and Load 6
Seagate Center
Toledo, OH
Sunday September 25th, 2011
Host: Johnny Suave
Suave in the ring. He thanks the Seagate Center and marvels at the coincidence that the convention hall had a wrestling ring and seating all set. Yes, what a coincidence indeed.
A steel cage comes down and covers the ring and Suave throws it to the beautiful Jamie Chung…
…comes out to introduce the first match.
MATCH #1- Five Minute Cage Match Casey Anthony (?) vs. ‘The Demolition Machine in a Short Skirt’ Dawn McGill -Anthony, after a Florida judge on Friday doubled the amount Anthony had to reimburse authorities to more than $217,000 for the costs of investigating the disappearance of her 2-year-old daughter, Caylee, needs the money badly. -McGill was more than willing to give Anthony a five minute match. How long could Anthony stay in there with her?
…the bell rings…Anthony stays in her corner. McGill walks over, grabs her by the hair, and pulls her to the center. She throws Anthony into the cage wall. Anthony gets hung up over the top rope. McGill pulls her back in by her feet and whips her into the cage wall on the other side. Anthony staggers back out to middle of the ring. McGill’s drop toehold sends Anthony to the mat. McGill mounts and slaps on the Katahajime/Tazzmission. Anthony frantically taps out.
WINNER: Dawn McGill @ :56
Suave: “How long could Anthony stay in there with her? Not even one minute.”
The referee opens up the cage and the PCW Clean Up crew goes in to clean up the mess.
While they’re doing that, Bristol Palin, daughter of the Alaskan Pitbull, Sarah Palin, comes out and talks with Suave. Palin gets Johnny up to speed on her latest exploits and has a camera crew with her.
Then some 47 year old guy named Stephen Hanks started shouting something at her. He finally came close enough so Bristol and Suave could hear what he was saying. Hanks shouts if she rode Levi Johnston like she rode that mechanical bull in West Hollywood? He adds that ‘your mother’s a whore,’ ‘your mother is a *bleep*-ing whore.’ Palin confronts the guy and demands to know what she’s done so wrong. Hanks replies that just living and breathing is enough and tells Bristol her mother’s going to hell. He adds that Bristol and mom Sarah “don’t look anything like women,” and calls Bristol “white trash” and a “*bleep*-ing bitch.”
Suave intervenes and tells Hanks that’s totally uncalled for. Bristol starts walking away. Hanks throws Suave aside and goes up and pushes Palin from behind. Bristol grabs him by his t-shirt and drags him to the ring. She throws him in, joins him, and the locks the cage behind her. The referee, still in the ring from the previous match, calls for the bell.
Suave: “We’ve got an impromptu match!”
MATCH #2 Bristol Palin (R) vs. Stephen Hanks (D)
Bristol goes right on the attack. Hanks lifts her off her feet and hip tosses Palin through the air like a rag doll. Big splash in the corner by Hanks. Bristol drops to a knee and low bridges Hanks. Dropkick to the back of the head by Palin. She goes back to her corner and rifles through her purse. She brings out a bottle of hairspray. Hanks tries for a powerbomb and instead gets an eyeful of hairspray. Bristol then smacks Hanks in the head with the can and rams him into the ring post. She puts him in the tree of woe and then starts hits a drop kick to the nuts.
Palin climbs halfway up the cage. Hanks stumbles up. Palin jumps and missile dropkicks him into the side of the cage. Bristol with the roll up…1…2…3.
WINNER: Bristol Palin @ 4:08
Post match, Palin flips Hanks off and leaves.
Suave then runs down the remainder of the card for tonight.
First round match in PCW Lock and Load tournament Daniel-San (I) w/Mrs. Miyagi vs. PCW Champion Yamamoto Tanaka (D)
-How will the PCW Champion go out? Will he leave as champion? Or will someone take the title from him?
-Daniel-San is still smarting over PCW CEO Barack Obama and the PCW Executive Board discontinuing the Television Title- of which he held at the time. Now, after surviving two four-way matches he gets his chance against Tanaka? Can Daniel-San overcome the odds and a determined Democratic machine gunning to keep the title in their hands?
First round match in PCW Lock and Load tournament ‘American Citizen’ Kevin Scott (R) vs. O’Beck Bahama (D)
-In 2008, Scott (then Starz N. Stripes) and Bahama put on the greatest match in PCW history. Now, nearly 3 years later, can the two rekindle that magic and do it again?
-Scott would like nothing more than to excise the ghost of what happened that night. Yes, he’s held the PCW Title belt since then but he benefited from a bit of chicanery on the part of the PCW Competition Committee with Jill Berg forfeited the title. Now, Scott can kill two birds with one stone.
-Bahama’s long road back from a severe concussion that cost him the title in 2009 and put him out of action for nearly 2 years would be complete if he could defeat Scott and then win the PCW title back.
PCW Women’s Tag Team Title Match PCW Women’s Tag Team Champions Merchants of Death: Angel Scott and Angel Casey (R) vs. The Korver Sisters: Kelly and Korey (D) -If you’ve never seen Merchants of Death (formerly Angels of Death) in action, tonight you’re in for a treat. The MoD was the dominant tag team in Missouri Valley Wrestling and took on all comers. Tonight, they get old MVW foes, and former tag team champions themselves, The Korver Sisters. Kelly and Korey signed with the Democrats for one reason- they promised the team they would push them for the PCW Tag Team belts. Tonight is their opportunity. Can the Korvers, who have defeated the MoD before in MVW, use their technical skills to outmatch the most extreme female tag team political wrestling has ever seen?
PCW Tag Team Title Match PCW Tag Team Champions The Schmidt Brothers: Jack and Joe (R) w/Ron Paul (R-TX) and Vince Vaughn vs The California Teacher’s Union: ‘Foul Pole’ Andy Golatta and Malibu Dusty (D) w/’The Self Proclaimed Savior of the Middle Class’ Big Labor (D) and the Longshoremen (D) -In what should be an all-out war, The Schmidt Brothers put their PCW Tag Team belts on the line against former champions- The California Teacher’s Union. The Schmidts, 3 time PCW Tag Team champions, took back the title from the CTU at PCW Loose Cannons Unleashed. Now, the Schmidts find themselves up against not only the CTU but the unions fighting back to keep their political power. The big question in this match is the big rumor that Charlie Blackwell, ‘No Frills’ Chris Escondido, and Blackwell’s Les Miserables will intervene in this match on the Schmidt’s behalf. If so, not only will there be plenty of action in the ring, they’ll be a lot of action outside the ring as well.
PCW King of Extreme Title Match PCW King of Extreme Champion Keith Olbermann (D) vs. The Queen of Political Extreme Ann Coulter (R) -Olbermann has held the title since PCW Loose Cannons Unleashed. Now, he faces an extreme challenge from ‘The Queen of Political Extreme’ herself Ann Coulter. Her recent Facebook remarks about Troy Davis the night he was executed show that Coulter is in rare form.
-For his part, Olbermann continues to do the things he usually does, rip Sarah Palin, rip Republicans, but on a much smaller scale than before- on Current TV. Can Olbermann’s usual schtick hold up against ‘The Queen of Political Extreme?’ Stay tuned…
PCW Women’s Title Match PCW Women’s Champion Callie Urban (D) vs. PCW’s Queen of Extreme Valora Salinas (I) -At the last Missouri Valley Wrestling pay per view show, May’s Arch Wrestling Madness, Urban and Salinas put on a five minute exhibition of pure adrenalinized combat. After getting cut in the initial seconds of the match, Valora threw everything she had at Urban in a frenzied attempt to end the match quick. Urban held on and as Valora weakened took control of the match.
-Valora has won titles everywhere she’s gone from Wrestling Midwest to High Octane Wrestling, the WfWA to Missouri Valley Wrestling. Can she add the PCW Women’s title to that list? Urban also has an impressive resume of titles to her credit from no Brand Wrestling to All-star Championship Wrestling. This is shaping up to be a remake of the ages.
PCW Title Match TBA vs. TBA -The winner of Daniel-San (I) w/Mrs. Miyagi vs. PCW Champion Yamamoto Tanaka (D) and ‘American Citizen’ Kevin Scott (R) vs. O’Beck Bahama (D) will meet and the winner will be the PCW Champion.
Posted on August 10, 2010 by Political Championship Wrestling
PCW Extreme Political TV on P-SPAN (2 hours)
Utica Memorial Auditorium
Utica, NY Monday August 9th
Host: Paige McGillicutty
Paige McGillicutty
Paige McGillicutty – Paige McGillicutty here with tonight’s PCW Extreme Political TV report. Tonight was PCW’s first two hour show on P-SPAN and started with an unusual debut to say the very least. Let’s go ‘The Voice of PCW’ Johnny Suave ringside.
[......Kimber Marshall inside the ring.
Kimber Marshall - ...Pat Starr!
*’I Wrote This Song’ by Patrick Star plays*
Twinkle, Twinkle patrick star
I made myself a sandwich
My mommy named it fred
It tastes like beans & bacon
And it smells like it’s been dead!
Writing is hard
So I use a pointy pencil
pointy pointy pointy pointy pointy point
Pee-uuh
What’s that horrible smell?
I have a head
It ends in a point pointy pointy pointy pointy pointy point This song is over
Except 4 this line:
You win this round
Broccoli
Yeah!
Johnny Suave – Okay. What the hell was that?
Pat Starr climbs into the ring and jumps up and down.
THUMP
THUMP
THUMP-THUMP-THUMP
THUMP
THUMP
THUMP-THUMP-THUMP
The video screen goes to just outside a dressing room in the back. A police escort is waiting at the door. One of the policemen knocks on the door.
Policeman – Ms. Berg. It’s time.
Jill-Berg
The door opens and four large male bodybuilding types walk out of the dressing room surrounding a petite woman and her male assistant, Jerry. The woman is busy talking on her cell phone while the man furiously scribbles down notes as the group makes their way towards the ring.
THUMP
THUMP
THUMP-THUMP-THUMP
The procession emerges from the back and starts their way down the ramp. The male assistant has a microphone and a portable tape recorder. He flips it on.
“JILL-BERG…JILL-BERG…”
The group then continues towards the ring leaving the police escort behind.
“JILL-BERG…JILL-BERG…”
The four bodyguards assist Ms. Berg into the ring. She and her assistant immediately go to a corner.
“JILL-BERG…JILL-BERG…”
Berg continues to talk on her cell phone.
“JILL-BERG…JILL-BERG…”
“JILL-BERG…JILL-BERG…”
MATCH #1
Jill-Berg (R)
vs.
Pat Starr (I)
End Summary
…Berg’s bodyguard spears Starr. Another one gives Starr a jackhammer slam. The other two bodyguards hold Starr up. Berg hands Jerry her phone and walks over…BUZZSAW KICK! Starr down and out. Berg covers…1…2…3.
WINNER AND NOW 16-0: Jill-Berg in :36
……]
Paige McGillicutty – Next, we found out who John McCain (R) and J.D. Hayworth (R) were going to choose to represent them at August 24th’s Arizona Showdown in the Desert.
John McCain (R)
J.D. Hayworth (R)
[......Hayworth names rookie Doug "King Kong' Kingman as his champion...
Doug 'King Kong' Kingman (R)
McCain names Magnum P.O.'d. Magnum comes out with his valet, Robyn Masters...
Magnum, P.O.’d (R)
Valet: Robyn Masters
Hayworth and McCain then begin to jaw back and forth. Kingman cheap shots Magnum. Robyn Masters comes in and low blows Kingman.
Suddenly, the Tea Party (Nic Koteen, NRA, Al Cahall) led by the 'Princess of Political Incorrectness' Andrea Doria run in and attack McCain, Magnum, and Masters......]
Paige McGillicutty – So, the Showdown in the Desert promises to be an extreme affair with the Tea Party throwing their support behind Hayworth. Next…
[......Jill-Berg stands in the back.
Jill-Berg - HI, I'M JILL-BERG FROM POLITICAL CHAMPIONSHIP WRESTLING. WHAT DO SEX, TATTOOS, BODY PIERCINGS, TOOTHBRUSHES, AND CONTACT SPORTS HAVE IN COMMON? THEY CAN ALL PUT COLLEGE STUDENTS AT RISK FOR HEPATITIS B, A SERIOUS DISEASE THAT CAN LEAD TO CHRONIC, EVEN LIFE THREATENING LIVER DISEASE. MOST OF THE 78,000 PEOPLE INFECTED IN 2001 WERE YOUNG ADULTS, AND THERE IS NO CURE. A SAFE AND EFFECTIVE VACCINE CAN PREVENT HEPATITIS B. HEALTH OFFICIALS RECOMMEND THAT ALL STUDENTS GET VACCINATED. LEARN MORE ABOUT THIS TODAY. THIS HAS BEEN A PUBLIC SERVICE MESSAGE FROM ME, JILL-BERG. OTHER WRESTLERS WRESTLE FOR THEMSELVES. I'M WRESTLING FOR THE CHILDREN......]
Paige McGillicutty – This, of course, gave Nancy Pelosi and Harry Reid plenty of heartburn…
[......Leader of the PCW Competition Committee Nancy Pelosi (D)...
Nancy Pelosi (D)
and Leader of the PCW Executive Committee Harry Reid (D)...
Harry Reid (D)
Pelosi and Reid discuss the 'Jill-Berg' problem. Reid wants to block her from ever getting a title shot. Pelosi agrees but wonders how? Reid comes up with a plan. Give Berg a match at PCW Lock and Load that she has to win or she'll never get a title shot. Pelosi thinks she has just the idea for a match.
Sharron Angle (R)
Sharron Angle (R) runs in and waffles Reid with a steel chair. Pelosi dives to the floor as Angle blasted away on Reid.
Democrats Rahm Emanuel and Reika Kisaurgi run in and pull Angle off......]
Paige McGillicutty – Last night, Charlie Blackwell wrestled former Pro Wrestling Fire Champion Jack Benevolence in the second round of the Expert’s Extreme Tournament. Here’s how it went…
(courtesy of The Experts)
[......The scene goes backstage as a group of guards arrive outside the cells of Jack Benevolence and Charlie Blackwell, and the two wrestlers stare one another down from inside their opposing cells. A main guard steps forward, looking from one side to the other.
Guard - Prisoners A-UR-8 and A-UR-10, stand back for unlocking.
Benevolence and Blackwell do as they are told as the other guards unlock their cells. The two wrestlers slowly exit their cells with a team of guards surrounding each of them as chaperones for the competitors. As they are being lead down the corridor Benevolence smirks.
Jack Benevolence - All set to crash out, rookie?
Blackwell grits his teeth as he's lead down the corridor alongside Benevolence, trying to ignore his arrogant opponent.
Jack Benevolence - I guess you're looking forward to your brush with fame against the man who put Level-One out, aren't you?
Again Blackwell grits his teeth as he continues to head towards the ring. Finally Benevolence smirks again, facing Blackwell.
Jack Benevolence - I guess I'm just gonna have to make you tap out, aren't I?
Charlie Blackwell - Just you God damn try it!
Now both are stopped dead as they stare one another down. They get closer, going nose to nose before Benevolence laughs, and slaps Blackwell across the face! Blackwell stumbles back, throwing a shot at Benevolence and he slams him up against the bars of the nearest cell. Benevolence throws shots back at him as the two brawl it out, the guards trying to tear them away from one another. Finally the fight calms down and the guards manage to separate them, both still staring one another down.
Guard - Get them out of here, they can settle it in their match.
Jack Benevolence - WHEN I WIN!
Charlie Blackwell - Yeah, right...
The crowd begin to chant “Let's go Blackwell” as the scene returns to ringside ahead of their match.
MATCH #2 - Round 2 of the Expert's Extreme Tournament
Charlie Blackwell (I)
vs.
Jack Benevolence
Blackwell gets to the top rope and stalks the staggering Jack Benevolence for his signature missile dropkick. Benevolence spots Blackwell as he leaps, and manages to pull the referee in the way, causing Blackwell to dropkick the ref! The crowd boo Benevolence as he storms at Blackwell with a massive clothesline. He then looks at the downed match official and the downed Blackwell, and shouts at Russell White who pulls out a steel chair from ringside. He slides it through to Benevolence who grasps it, and as Blackwell gets to his feet Benevolence slams the chair over Blackwell's head! Blackwell hits the mat and Benevolence spots the referee beginning to stir. Benevolence then drags Blackwell up and throws him into the corner, wedging the chair between Blackwell and the turnbuckles, before he hits the mat himself. Kenzie Blair begins to shout and scream at the referee, however Russell White's able to get a hand over her mouth as the referee stands, spotting the supine Jack Benevolence and Blackwell in the corner with a weapon by his side... and he calls for the bell!
Winner, via DQ and advancing: Jack Benevolence @ 8:44
......]
Paige McGillicutty – Linda McMahon (R) came out next. She was a little vexed over a certain wrestling company putting on a pay per view with certain wrestlers from a certain extreme wrestling company.
[......McMahon decries TNA's ECW-themed PPV as a blatant attempt to make money off of trademarks owned by her husband's company. She mocked the show and added that they couldn't even get Paul Heyman to attend. ECW was a brand, a brand now owned by her husband that couldn't cut it on the Sci-Fi network and was cancelled.
Average Joe (I) came out. He calls ECW more than just a 'brand.' Last night's show reclaimed the spirit of ECW that the WWE killed by watering it down for corporate consumption. McMahon tries to cut back in but Average Joe keeps going. He says he's glad Heyman didn't show up last night because it would have taken the focus off the real heroes of ECW- the workers themselves.
McMahon, now angry, signals to the back and out comes 'Sports Entertainment Genius' Mr. McMann with the Corporation of Domination (Big Oil, Big Electric, Kirk Walstreit) The C.O.D. attack Average Joe and then the American Heartland Coalition (Ken Worth- The American Trucker, SNAFU, and ‘No Frills’ Chris Escondido) run down......]
Paige McGillicutty – Match three featured the PCW Tag Team champions, The Kings of Old School (D) against two young Republicans in Josh Jackson and Nick Ray.
[......
MATCH #3- PCW Tag Team Title Match
Kings of Old School: Ricky Michaels and Marty Lane(D) (c) vs.
Josh Jackson and Nick Ray (R)
End summary ...Michaels on Ray, Lane on Jackson inside the ring. Arm drags by Jackson. Jab and Jackson whips Lane into the ropes. Lane hits the flying tackle to end that. Michaels and Ray roll in. Ray charges into an elbow. Second rope clothesline by Michaels. Ray with a whip and he runs into a boot. Flying tackle from the top by Lane. Michaels creams Ray with a trash can lid shot. Skillet shot by Lane to Ray. Jackson is in and tattoos Michaels with a cookie sheet. Ray blindsides Michaels. But he misses a clothesline and eats the trashcan lid shot from Lane. Michaels hits the inverted DDT on Ray for 2. Michaels gets nailed with a neckbreaker by Jackson for 2.
Lane clobbers Jackson with a trashcan lid shot and calls for a table. Michaels obliges. Lane and Michaels lift Jackson and put him through the table. Michaels covers...1...2...3.
WINNER AND STILL PCW TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS: The Kings of Old School @ 9:03
The Kings of Old School take the mic. Michaels says they are the greatest tag team in the world.
'No Frills' Chris Escondido and Charlie Blackwell (I)
Escondido and Blackwell run in. Johnny Suave is shocked that Blackwell is back from Siberia already. Big staredown between both teams.
......]
Paige McGillicutty – Jill Berg then checked in with another PSA.
[......Jill Berg stands in front of a wall.
Jill-Berg - Hi. I'm Jill Berg with a special public service announcement...DID YOU KNOW THAT ADOLESCENTS AND YOUNG ADULTS ARE AT INCREASED RISK FOR A POTENTIALLY DEADLY DISEASE CALLED MENINGOCOCCAL MENINGITIS ?
Johnny Suave - Well? No...
Jill-Berg - NEW VACCINATION RECOMMENDATIONS HAVE RECENTLY BEEN APPROVED FOR TEENS AND COLLEGE STUDENTS WHO ARE AT AN INCREASED RISK FOR CONTRACTING THIS DISEASE. IMMUNIZATION AND GOOD HYGIENE MAY HELP PREVENT MOST CASES IN TEENS AND YOUNG ADULTS.
TALK TO YOUR CHILD’S DOCTOR ABOUT IMMUNIZATION OR VISIT W-W-W- DOT-N-M-A-U-S-DOT-O-R-G.
Berg smiles to the camera.
Jill-Berg - I'm Jill Berg. Remember, I'm not just wrestling for myself. I'm wrestling for the children....]
Paige McGillicutty – Levi Johnston and Bristol Palin’s re-engagement lasted…a few seconds. Johnston appeared in the ring with an explanation.
[.......Levi Johnston in the ring.
Levi Johnston - Okay...I know there's been a lot of speculation about what happened with Bristol and me. I might have gotten someone else pregnant. I might have made a deal for a reality show. The real reason is she couldn't handle the fact that I've decided to...
Suddenly a bunch of cameramen surrounded the ring and started taking taking pictures.
Levi Johnston - ...run for mayor of Wasilla...and have a reality show based on it. Isn't that a good idea?
Johnny Suave - No...not really. And here comes the Mama Grizzly herself, the Alaskan Pitbull, Sarah Palin!
Sarah climbs into the ring with her trusty hockey stick. Johnston backs up.
The crowd roars when Bristol Palin marches to the ring.
Bristol Palin - Mom, I'll take care of this.
Levi Johnston - Now Bristol, let's talk about this...
Bristol takes the hockey stick and drills Johnston in the balls with it......]
Paige McGillicutty – Not a good night for Levi Johnston. Then, Nancy Pelosi, fed up with Jill-Berg’s PSA’s, came out.
[.......Nancy Pelosi tells Jill-Berg that she's tired of her whining and PSA's. So here's what she's going to agree to. Berg will wrestle the Kings of Old School in a handicap match at PCW Lock and Load in two weeks. If Berg wins, Pelosi will consider given her a title shot. If Berg loses, she's out of PCW alltogether.
Suave doesn't think it sounds very fair. But Berg comes out and agrees to the stipulation......]
Paige McGillicutty – Following that, a battle of PCW newcomers.
[......
MATCH #4
Andy Golatta (I)
vs. Jordan Metzger (D)
End Summary ...Metzger with a high crossbody. He covers for 2. Metzger whips Golatta into the ropes and he runs into a nasty superkick to the jaw for another 2. Golatta applies a hammerlock then rams Metzger into the corner. Golatta works on the arm but Metzger somehow delivers a kick to the face. Jabs by Metzger. He tries a kick but Golatta ducks it and unloads with a massive right for 2. Golatta with a whip. Metzger comes off the ropes and lands a somersault kick to the head for 2. Somersault leg drop from the middle rope! 1...2...no! Metzger goes back up top...inverted 450 Leg Drop...FOUL POLE! Golatta covers...1...2...3!!!
Johnny Suave - HOLY CRAP! What did I just see??
The replay shows that just as Metzger came down, Golatta reared back and nailed him with the foul pole right below the belt. Metzger crumpled in half and Golatta scored the easy pin.
WINNER: Andy Golatta @ 11:25
Johnny Suave - Wow! I-ya...that just hurts looking at it......]
Paige McGillicutty – And if things couldn’t get any more bizarre…
[......A pissed off flight attendant marches wearing a wet shirt to the ring.
Johnny Suave - That's JetBlue flight attendant Steve Slater! Why is he here?
Slater climbs into the ring.
Steve Slater - You can all #$@# off! Especially the @#@hole who bumped into me and made me spill my beer! I've had it!
Road Rage Randy (Triple R) (D)
Johnny Suave - OH, OH! HERE COMES TRIPLE R!
Triple R hits the ring and clotheslines Slater. He starts beating the living crap out of him.
Johnny Suave - Makes sense! Triple R would be one of those types who'd pull something out of an overhead bin before the plane came to a complete stop and then be a total ass about it afterwards.
Triple R lifts Slater and heaves him over the top rope. Then he turns to the crowd with his arms up.
Ken Worth- The American Trucker (I)
Johnny Suave - IT'S THE PCW TELEVISION CHAMPION! KEN WORTH- THE AMERICAN TRUCKER!
Worth tackles Triple R and they roll around the ring......]
Paige McGillicutty – Yeah, the Ken W orth-Triple R feud is heating up rather nicely, don’t you think? Those two have a standing date at PCW Lock and Load in two weeks. Next, the Tea Party faced off against one of it’s most vocal enemies, MSNBC.
[......
MATCH #5
Nic Koteen, NRA, and Al Cahall w/the 'Queen of Political Incorrectness' Andrea Doria (Tea Party) vs.
MSNBC: Keith Olbermann, 'Hardball' Chris Matthews, and Rachel Maddow (D)
End Summary
......Everyone is on the floor except Koteen...He launches himself over the top onto everyone! Rachel Maddow tries to fly but misses. Koteen tags in and hits a backbreaker on Maddow. Koteen for the win...he gets a 2 count. Chops in the corner by Koteen. Maddow responds with poke to the eye and tags in 'Hardball' Chris Matthews. Matthews fights back with chops of his own and a big clothesline. He charges...right into a drop toe hold into the turnbuckle by Koteen! NRA tags in for the Tea Party. He takes down Maddow and Olbermann in the corner. Crossbody to Matthews. Cover...1...2...no. Leg kicks by NRA to Matthews. Russian leg sweep followed by a low dropkick by NRA. He covers...Olbermann is in to break it up. Koteen is on the top, Matthews and Maddow superplex him down. NRA and Al Cahall are over...Gun Rack! NRA has Matthews in the Gun Rack but clothesline by Olbermann. Olbermann follows with the Skull-Krushing Finale on Al Cahall! Missile dropkick by Maddow to NRA! Olbermann with a double underhook piledriver to Al Cahall! Olbermann covers! 1...2...3!
WINNER: MSNBC @ 8:54
......]
Paige McGillicutty – And that brings us to our main event. ‘American Citizen’ Kevin Scott versus Road Rage Randy aka Triple R. Both of these guys have designs on the PCW Title. Scott has actually held the PCW Title. Let’s go to the ring and see how this one turned out.
[.......
MATCH #6
Kevin Scott (R)
vs. Road Rage Randy (D)
End Summary...legdrop by Triple R into the chair! He covers...2 count only. Whip by Triple R...no reverse by Scott but Triple R elbows him. Triple R goes to the top but Scott gets there before he can jump...slam off the top by Scott. Scott grabs the chair...*WHAP* Triple R staggers back...*WHAP* Scott throws down the chair and bulldogs Triple R face first onto it. Scott goes top rope...
Yamamoto Tanaka (D)
Johnny Suave - IT'S THE PCW CHAMPION!
...Tanaka runs down and crotches Scott on the top rope. Tanaka then calls his valet Reika in to hold the chair in front of Scott's face...Van Daminator! Scott falls to the floor. Tanaka and Reika pull Scott back in. Tanaka climbs the corner turnbuckle.
Johnny Suave - HE'S GOING FOR THE JAPANESE SUPERDESTROYER! BUT WAIT!...
Doug 'King Kong' Kingman (R)
Kingman runs to the ring and pushes Tanaka off the top rope. Tanaka and Scott land separately inside the ring. Kingman gets a chair and puts it on Tanaka...leg drop to the chair! Triple R back up. Scott gets a boot up to a charging Triple R at the last possible second. Springboard tornado DDT to the chair by Scott!!! 1...2...3!!!
WINNER: Kevin Scott @ 14:21
Johnny Suave - KEVIN SCOTT IS BACK!
Nancy Pelosi's voice - WAIT A MINUTE! WAAAAAIIIITTTTT A MINUTE!
Johnny Suave - Great. Here comes Nancy Pelosi.
Pelosi and Harry Reid appear.
Nancy Pelosi - Kevin Scott. I suppose you think that because you defeated Triple R tonight that you deserve a title shot against Yamamoto Tanaka at PCW Lock and Load in 2 weeks.
The crowd cheers.
Nancy Pelosi - Well, guess what? You don't. In two weeks, it'll be Average Joe versus the PCW Champion Yamamoto Tanaka in the Main Event of PCW Lock and Load!
The crowd boos. But Sharron Angle (R) walks out with a piece of paper.
Sharron Angle - Sorry to interrupt you Nancy. But I have something that's of interest to your pal Harry Reid. This piece of paper says that the seventh match to be named for November's PCW Extreme Election Night 2010 is...SHARRON ANGLE VERSUS HARRY REID!
Crowd - RAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
Johnny Suave - HOLY CRAP! ANGLE VERSUS REID AT PCW EXTREME ELECTION NIGHT! LOOK AT REID'S FACE!
Posted on July 22, 2010 by Political Championship Wrestling
Paige McGillicutty
Paige McGillicutty here with a PCW News update.
Political Championship Wrestling held it’s first House Show since the July 4th show in Great Falls, Montana as it gears up for the return of PCW Extreme Political TV on August 2nd.
Highlights of the evening included:
Levi Johnston coming out with Bristol Palin.
[...some cheers, some boos greet Johnston and he prepares to speak.
Levi Johnston and Bristol Palin
Levi Johnston - I really thought we were over. But Bristol and I went for a walk with Tripp and...well...the rest is history. I've apologized to Todd and Sarah Palin for some of the things I said which weren't true. I just want to marry Bristol and get on with our lives.
Man's voice - Hold on there.
Keith Olbermann
Keith Olbermann - What do you mean you lied about Sarah Palin?
Levi Johnston - Some of the things I said wasn't true.
Keith Olbermann - But...you were talking about Sarah Palin. How could it not be true? It HAS to be true.
Levi Johnston - Some of them wasn't. And that's why I apologized to her.
Olbermann puts his hands on his ears.
Keith Olbermann - La, la, la, la I didn't hear that.
Levi Johnston - Well, it's true.
Keith Olbermann - La, la, la, la...
Sarah Palin walks down carrying her hockey stick.
Sarah Palin - Ha. Very funny. That's not me.
Sarah Palin - That's better. Okay, Bristol is an adult and more than capable of making her own decisions. That doesn't mean that there's some issues that we'll have to work through.
Levi Johnston - I understand.
Keith Olbermann - But, what you said HAS to be true. How can it NOT be true? We're talking about Sarah Palin here! Sarah Palin!
Olbermann lurches forward at Johnston and then turns toward Sarah Palin.
Palin raises the hockey stick and blasts Olbermann in the face with it.
Crowd - PCW!...PCW!...PCW!!!
Johnston smiles at Palin. Palin smiles at Johnston. Johnston extends his hand. Palin shakes his hand. Johnston nods. Palin clocks him over the head with the hockey stick.
Crowd - PCW!...PCW!...PCW!!!
Johnston on the ground. Bristol goes over to him.
Bristol Palin - MOM!
....]
Paige McGillicutty – Another highlight was this moment…
[......Shirley Sherrod in the ring with Obama aide Tom Vilsack.
Shirley Sherrod
Tom Vilsack
*flute and clarinet flourish*
Two men come out and unroll a white carpet to the ring steps. Dancers then dance. Ballet dancers…ballet? Little children walk up the white carpet and drop rose petals. Someone lets loose some pigeons…we’re still not sure just how they’ll get out of the building. The crowd stands as PCW CEO Barack Obama appears. Behind Obama walks Joe Biden.
Barack Obama - Look, Shirley. On behalf of me, Tom Vilsack, the NAACP...
Joe Biden - ...Bill O'Reilly...
Barack Obama - ...ah, no. I'm not apologizing for Bill O'Reilly. Shirley, we're sorry about the misunderstanding. Our bad. Won't happen again.
Shirley Sherrod - Well? I-
Male voice - Oh pul-leeze.
Andrew Breitbart of Breitbart.com walks out.
Andrew Breitbart
Andrew Breitbart - The partisan media wars aren't going to die down anytime soon. It's the liberals and the mainstream media's fault for making em into a target. It's a convenient rush to judgment. To make me this bad guy who's taking on this lovely, black grandmotherly type. This is about making me try to seem racist when I'm not.
Tom Vilsack - With all due respect, you're the one who posted the video with the headline, "Video Proof: The NAACP Awards Racism -- 2010.
Andrew Breitbart - You don't get it. It was not meant to be an attack on Sherrod but rather a lesson to the NAACP that it uses accusations of racism to stifle dissent.
Tom Vilsack - By doctoring the video?
Andrew Breitbart - Doctor, smoctor-
*Def Leppard's 'Rock, Rock Til You Drop begins to play*
Hold onto your hat, hold onto your heart
Ready, get set to tear this place apart
Don't need a ticket, only place in town
That'll take you up to heaven and never bring you down
Anything goes! Anything goes!
Whiskey Tango Foxtrot
The crowd goes nuts when the Extreme Equalizer Whiskey Tango Foxtrot appears.
Women to the left, Women to the right
There to entertain and take you thru the night
So grab a little heat and come along with me
'Cause your mama don't mind what your mama don't see
Anything goes! Anything goes!
Breitbart looks concerned as the Extreme Equalizer runs to the ring.
Rock! Rock! till you drop
Rock! Rock! never stop
Rock! Rock! till you drop
I say Rock! Rock! to the top
WTF grabs Breitbart by the throat...lifts him up...and choke slams him to the mat.
Crowd - PCW!...PCW!...PCW!
...]
Paige McGillicutty – Running down the matches from last night…
PCW Champion Yamamoto Tanaka (D) defeated Average Joe (I) in a rematch of their classic match from PCW Loose Cannons Unleashed.
SNAFU (I) defeated Andy Riley (D)
PCW Tag Team Champions The Kings of Old School: Bobby Michaels and Marty Lane defeated Big Oil and Big Electric
Josh Jackson (R) defeated Jordan Metzger (D)
Triple R (D) defeated Nick Ray (R)
The Bi-Partisan Dream Team: Blue Dog D (D) and RINO- The Wonk Machine (R) defeated Paddy O’Kennedy and Boss Mark Ditka (D)
PCW Extreme Political TV returns August 2nd with the next pay per view coming up on August 23rd.
Posted on November 15, 2009 by Political Championship Wrestling
PCW Extreme Political TV
Agora Theater
Cleveland, OH
Saturday November 14th
Host: Johnny Suave
Suave reviews the PCW Rankings…
PCW WORLD CHAMPION: ‘Hollywood A-Lister’ Stone Chism (Progressive Alliance) PCW TELEVISION CHAMPION:SNAFU (Independent)
CONTENDERS:
#1- Starz N. Stripes (Progressive Alliance)
#2- Khalid-El (Axis of Evil)
#3- Bird ‘The Mark’ Ridfych (Independent)
#4- ‘The King of Old School Gimmicks’ Baron Von Munchke (Old School Kings)
#5- Newt Tron Bomb (American Patriots)
#6- American Trucker (American Heartland Coalition)
PCW TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS: ‘No Frills’ Chris Escondido and Starz N. Stripes (Progressive Alliance)
PCW TAG TEAM TELEVISION CHAMPIONS: Big Oil and Big Electric (Public Utilities) CONTENDERS:
#1- A. Tom Bomb and Hy Drogen Bomb (American Patriots)
#2- Midnite Rockin’ Xpress- Bobby Ricky Michaels/Marty Gibson-Lane (Old School Kings)
#3- Jack and Bull Schett (Ron Paul’s New Libertarian Army)
#4- NCISF’d
#5- Extreme Weather Network-Steve Abrams/Mike Bettis (EWN)
#6- The Goatbusters (Island of Misfit Wrestlers)
Tonight on PCW Extreme Political TV:
Blue Dog D and RINO vs. Newcomer Shaun Phillips and T-Bag (American Patriots)
Raving Rednecks Locke and Loade (American Patriots) vs. Island of Misfit Wrestlers
PCW Champion Stone Chism (Progressive Alliance) vs. Jobber the Hut (Island of Misfit Wrestlers)
American Trucker (American Heartland Coalition) vs. Baron Von Munchke w/Dr. Bill (Old School Kings)
Suave: “Here comes PCW’s latest signee, Shaun Phillips. Phillips as you might know was one half of the DWF Tag Team Champions USXF with Amy Mason who just signed with Missouri Valley Wrestling. American Patriots Leader Eric Cantor hopes Phillips can help spearhead their resurgance. We’ll find out starting tonight as Phillips and T-Bag take on the Bipartisan Dream Team Blue Dog D and RINO.”
MATCH #1
Shaun Phillips and T-Bag (American Patriots)
vs. Blue Dog D (Progressive Alliance) and RINO (American Patriots)
…Suave: “Phillips makes the tag to T-Bag. T-Bag in…and OW! RINO greets him with a chop. T-Bag takes a step back. Mule kick. RINO didn’t see that coming! OH! T-Bag just kicked RINO in the groin! RINO bent over in obvious pain. He makes it to his corner and brings in Blue Dog D. Blue Dog D in. He runs the ropes…slingshot bodyblock! T-Bag slow to get up. Blue Dog D goes top rope. INCOMING! SHOOTING STAR PRESS! Blue Dog D for the win…1 …2…NO! T-Bag kicks out. Unbelievable! T-Bag slowly gets up. Blue Dog D with a waistlock…now a waistlock suplex! Blue Dog D covers…1…2…AGAIN! T-BAG JUST KICKED OUT! Blue Dog D is pissed. He thought he had him…he throws T-Bag through the ropes to the floor. RINO! RINO’S CHOKING T-BAG WITH A MICROPHONE CABLE! Here comes Blue Dog D…FALLING SPLASH! GOOD THING RINO GOT OUT OF THE WAY IN TIME. SHAUN PHILLIPS OVER! BLUE DOG D GETS BACK INTO THE RING! GORE! GORE! PHILLIPS FORGOT ABOUT RINO AND HE JUST BLASTED HIM WITH A GORE!” RINO takes T-Bag and heaves him back into the ring. Suave: “Phillips still down after taking a Gore from RINO. Blue Dog D with a running lariat and that bounces T-Bag hard off the mat. Blue Dog D walks around him…he’s measuring him…” Blue Dog D pulls T-Bag up and tucks his head under his armpit. He hoists him up, and then falls back onto the floor. Suave: “FILIBUSTER BUSTER! FILIBUSTER BUSTER! COVER! DAVEY KEELS COUNTS…1 …2 …3!“
WINNERS: BLUE DOG D and RINO in 9:43
Suave: “BLUE DOG D AND RINO MAKE THEIR RETURN TO PCW AND THE BIPARTISAN DREAM TEAM ARE VICTORIOUS! BACK WITH MORE PCW AFTER THIS…”
Replay of Miss USA-Jill Berg Match from DWF Golden Dreams
MVW Champion Miss USA speaks
‘Extreme Pizza Delivery Chick’ Tessa Mason and Caroline Kelly
vs.
Sabrina James and Alicia Rowe
vs.
Katie Collins and ‘Texas Cowgirl’ Haley Dallas
The Star Trekkies
vs.
Vatican Vice Squad
vs.
VIP Brin and Sky
Corrina Romanov
vs.
American Pi
‘Trailer Park Skater Girl’ Tanya Hardy
w/The White Trash Posse and Trailer Park Barbi
vs.
Weathergirl Hallie
After a replay of last week’s MVW/DWF Women’s unification match, Miss USA has some observations to make. The overriding question is will the 49-1 Jill Berg come to Missouri Valley Wrestling to continue her pursuit of excellence?
Two three team tag team matches highlight the card. The first match sees former DWF newcomers Amy aka…’Extreme Pizza Delivery Chick Tessa’ Mason and Caroline Kelly taking on former PCW wrestlers Sabrina James (formerly Mercedes in PCW) and Alicia Rowe (former Porsche Lexus) and former 3 time PCW Women’s Champion Katie Collins and the “Texas Cowgirl” Haley Dallas.
Match two sees The Star Trekkies meeting up against the always tough Vatican Vice Squad and VIP Brin and Sky.
Corrina Romanov begins another quest for gold as she meets up with the uber intelligent American Pi and Weathergirl Hallie also starts the long climb up with a match against ‘Trailer Park Skater Girl’ Tanya Hardy.
Suave: “Friday night, a shocking and disturbing incident took place at a Sarah Palin book signing…”
SARAH PALIN BOOK SIGNING
Suave (voiceover): Palin was signing books when this happened.” Three masked men barged their way to the front of the line. The first man removed his mask. Suave (voiceover): “THAT’S RIGHT! IT’S LEVI JOHNSTON…” Johnston takes one of the books and clubs Palin in the side of the head with it. Then the other two take their masks off. Suave: “…AND MSNBC’S KEITH OLBERMANN AND HIS PALIN-HATING SIDEKICK SHANNYN MOORE! (if you don’t know who Shannyn Moore is- click here)” Olbermann and Moore pile a stack of Palin’s book ‘Going Rogue’ on the table. Johnston pushes a dazed Palin to the floor. Then he reaches into his pocket and lights a match. A huge fireball appears and torches the books. Suave: “THAT’S RIGHT! LEVI JOHNSTON, WHO’S CASHING IN ON THE ‘HATE-PALIN’ SENTIMENTS AMONG THE LEFT, USED A FIREBALL AND SET HER BOOKS ON FIRE! OLBERMANN, WHO FLATLY REFUSES TO APPEAR IN A PCW ARENA BEFORE EVERYTIME HE DOES, HE GETS CHOKE-SLAMMED BY THE EXTREME EQUALIZER WHISKEY TANGO FOXTROT, KICKS AWAY AT PALIN WHILE MOORE, WHO SEEMS TO HAVE AS MUCH OF A GRADE SCHOOL CRUSH ON PALIN AS OLBERMANN DOES, JOINS IN!”
*The opening riffs to Def Leppard’s ‘Rock, Rock Til You Drop play*
Suave: “THAT’S RIGHT! IT’S THE EXTREME EQUALIZER- WHISKEY TANGO FOXTROT!” A lane opens up among the people in line and WTF races to the table. Olbermann’s eyes light up when he sees WTF coming and he quickly scurries out the back. Moore also makes a quick exit leaving Levi Johnston to face the Extreme Equalizer. WTF grabs him by the throat…lifts…and WHAM! Right through the burning table. Crowd in line: “PCW!…PCW!…PCW!…”
Suave: “Somehow, I don’t think we’ve heard the last of the Johnston-Palin feud.”
MATCH #2
“The Raving Rednecks” Locke and Loade (American Patriots)
vs.
Mr. Jaundice and Captain Nausea w/Movie Classic (Island of Misfit Wrestlers) Gary Locke and Earl Loade hit the ring as Toby Keith’s “Who’s Your Daddy” plays. Suave: “THE RAVING REDNECKS ARE BACK IN PCW TO TAKE ANOTHER CRACK AT WINNING THE PCW TAG TEAM TITLES!”
…Suave: “…ELBOW DROP BY MR. JAUNDICE FROM THE TOP TURNBUCKLE! WE COULD BE ON THE VERGE OF SEEING AN UPSET?” Mr. Jaundice goes up again. Locke nails a ropeflip hiptoss. Suave: “LOCKE GOT HIM WITH THE HIP TOSS. MR. JAUNDICE SCRAMBLES TO THE CORNER AND TAGS IN CAPTAIN NAUSEA. Captain Nausea in…he whips Locke to the corner. Mr. Jaundice gets a cheap shot from behind. Captain Nausea sets up…elbowdrop. Mr. Jaundice runs back in…he drops the leg Locke. Gary Loade’s had enough. He’s in. HE DDT’S CAPTAIN NAUSEA TO THE MAT! LOCKE AND LOADE HAVE HIM UP…HERE IT COMES…WHAM! FOUR-D REDNECK DEATHBLAST! LOCKE COVERS…1 …2 …3!”
WINNER: ‘THE RAVING REDNECKS’ LOCKE AND LOADE in 6:32
Suave: “LOCKE AND LOADE WITH THE WIN OVER THE ISLAND OF MISFIT WRESTLERS! MORE PCW AFTER THIS.”
________________________________
_______COMMERCIAL BREAK_____
Suave: “Speaking of Dawn McGill. She once again took High Octane Wrestling’s ICON Champion Max Kael to the limit this past Thursday night.
(courtesy of High Octane Wrestling)
REPLAY: ICON Champion Max Kael vs. Dr. Annabel Lecktor …Rubbing her eyes Lecktor starts getting angry as she walks over to the timekeepers and grabs a steel chair as she slides back into the ring and goes after Max with the chair, who ducks the swing and takes Lecktor down with a drop kick to her knees. But instead of continuing his offense, Max again tries to rip the mask off Lecktor. She fights him off once again and hits him hard with a backfist which allows her to use the steel chair, cracking Max across the skull. She discards it as she grabs Max’s leg and goes for the pin.
Joe Hoffman: Max tried again for that mask and he ate that steel chair as a result. But we have no referee to make the count.
Suddenly we see HOFC referee Rick Stevens start to sprint down and slide into the ring as he starts to make the count for the pinfall.
1……2…….NO!!!
Max Kael is able to kickout as Stevens gets up from the mat and seems a bit lost inside a ring as a stunned Max gets back up to his feet and Lecktor goes for another spinning heel kick which this time does connect with Kael as she quickly locks in the testicular claw on Max as Stevens isn’t really sure if this is a legal move as he asks Max if he wants to submit.
Joe Hoffman: A quite unique submission move by Lecktor as she has a firm grip on Max’s…..Max’s…..
Benny Newell: BALLS……I dropped my shot glass….what’s going on in the ring?
Max seems to be in immense pain as he pulls himself over to the ropes slowly as Lecktor tries and pull Max back, which puts even more strain on a certain area of his body. Max continues to pull himself across the mat as he is able to grab onto the bottom rope as Stevens calls for Lecktor to release the hold and this time Max rolls out of the ring, realizing that he was very close to loosing the match.
Benny Newell: Did she just have his junk clamped in her hand? Damn! I usually have to pay to see shit like that.
Joe Hoffman: Glad you have decided to rejoin the match Benny.
Max storms around the ring before he slides back in and goes after Lecktor who ducks a wild punch and counters with a martial arts kick that Max is also able to duck as he drops to his knees and goes for a low blow on Lecktor which connects but has little affect on the lower female anatomy of Lecktor who smiles and shakes her head as she knees Kael in the head and goes for another pinfall on the ICON champion.
1……2……..3….
Joe Hoffman: Do we have an upset?
Max lifts his leg up onto the ropes as Stevens stops the count as Lecktor for a second thinks she has won the match before Stevens yells out “NO!” and the match continues on. Lecktor is down messing around as she lifts Max up from the mat and places his head between her legs and lefts him up onto her shoulders.
Joe Hoffman: A great showing of Lecktor’s strength lifting Max Kael who looks a good 50 pounds heavier then her.
Benny Newell: You sure I’m not paying to see this?
Lecktor has Max up in the air and Max again tries to pull the mask of Lecktor off….but realizing that he is about to be dropped to the mat he delivers a couple quick punches to Lecktor which allows him to escape from the powerbomb she was attempting and connect with a jawbreaker that dazes the masked female and sends her down to the mat for a moment as she pulls herself back up to her feet.
Joe Hoffman: I don’t like where this is heading for Lecktor….Max has turned his attention from the mask…
Benny Newell: Did I mention you should be wearing a mask instead of her yet?
Joe Hoffman: Yes….you mentioned that.
Benny Newell: Good….
Benny tosses another shot back, as Max stares at the dazed Lecktor for a few brief seconds before Max connects another European uppercut and then he hooks her neck and hit the lightning spiral on her which lays her out in the middle of the ring as he goes for the cover that Rick Stevens slides in to count.
Joe Hoffman: The Singularity….thanks for coming Lecktor.
1………2………..3…………..
Stevens calls for the bell as Max’s music plays but Max is not concerned with the victory he has just gotten or celebrating it.
Bryan McVay: The winner of this match in 11 minutes and 39 seconds….MAX KAEL!!!
Max just stares at Lecktor as instead of getting up from the mat he reaches over to Lecktor and with her out he reaches for her mask and slowly removes it from her face, revealing that it is not Annabel Lecktor…..
Joe Hoffman: Dawn McGill?!? Dawn was really the girl under the Lecktor mask. For the second week in a row she pushed Max to the limit, nearly defeating the ICON champion.
Shocked that the woman under the mask is Dawn, Max slowly get back to his feet as Dawn starts to stir on the mat. Max continues staring in shock as she climbs back up to her feet, starting too look back at Max Kael, who is surprisingly looking at her with a look of respect, maybe for pushing him to the edge for the second week in a row.
Joe Hoffman: Well it seems McGill wanted to get Max Kael’s attention and it seems with her showing tonight that she has gotten that and dare I say some respect from the ICON champion?
‘Hollywood A-Lister’ Stone Chism is in the ring with the Skanky Rich Bimbos Paris Hilton and Lindsay Lohan. Chism: “Okay. Why would you want to watch a fake icon when you can see a REAL icon right here…me.” Chism then parades the SRB around and then wants to know who the next person is who’s going to do the right thing and ‘lay down in the ring for him?’
Movie Classic comes out with the 375 pound Jobber the Hut lumbering right behind him. Suave: “Jobber the Hut is good for about a half a minute…after that…forget it.”
MATCH #3- Non-Title Match
PCW Champion ‘Hollywood A-Lister’ Stone Chism w/The Skanky Rich Bimbos
vs.
Jobber the Hut (Island of Misfit Wrestlers)(The bell rings) Suave: “There’s the bell. Chism is goofing off…not a good idea in the first thirty seconds of the match…JOBBER HOOKS HIM IN A FULL NELSON!” Jobber rams Chism into the corner turnbuckle over and over. Suave: “CHISM IN TROUBLE…COVER HIM! COVER HIM!” Paris Hilton and Lindsay Lohan hit the ring. Suave: “NO! Wait…I mean…YES!” Hilton and Lohan get Jobber’s attention and then whip their tops off. Suave: “WARDROBE MALFUNCTION! WARDROBE MALFUNCTION!” Chism pulls himself up. Suave: “OHHHH! CHISM GOES LOW AND JOBBER IS BENT OVER. CHISM FLOATS AROUND…NECKBREAKER! COVER!” Davey Keels counts. …1 …2 …3!
WINNER: ‘HOLLYWOOD A-LISTER’ STONE CHISM in :49
Suave: “AGAIN, THANKS TO THE SKANKY RICH BIMBOS, STONE CHISM GETS ANOTHER WIN IN PCW!”
PCW NEWSLINE w/ GINA RAMSEY Gina: “PCW CEO Barack Obama again fends off questions about his association with jailed High Octane Wrestling owner Lee Best. Anita Dunn and her A.D.D. crew continue to try to change the conversation to Fox News by blaming Fox’s association with the American Patriots for fueling the controversy. But as Best’s trial in January looms in the future, could the PCW CEO be drawn in?
“In other news, Lou Dobbs leaves CNN. Rumor has it that he could become a spokesperson for the American Heartland Coalition. The AHC refused all comment on the matter.
“University of New Mexico soccer player Elizabeth Lambert has been offered a contract by PCW.
No word on whether she’s accepted the offer.”
UPCOMING PCW EVENTS: 11/18- PCW House Show
11/21- PCW Extreme Political TV on P-SPAN
12/2- PCW House Show
12/5- PCW Extreme Political TV on P-SPAN
12/9- PCW House Show
12/12- PCW/MVW Night of Champions
12/20- WWR ‘Christmas in the Caribbean’ Supershow in Puerto De Macoris
12/26- PCW Year End in Review
______________________
______________________
The crowd boos as Dr. Bill strolls down the aisle. Suave: “Dr. Bill has kept a low profile since his claim that Dr. Annabel ‘The Cannibal’ Lecktor bit off his arm was proved to be a hoax. But what is up with the steel bracing and stuff on his arm?” Dr. Bill: “SHUT UP!” He raises his arm up. Dr. Bill: “DO YOU SEE WHAT THAT CANNIBAL DR. LECKTOR DID TO ME?” Suave: “Ah…no she didn’t.”
Charlene Ann Beckworth in the ring to announce the Main Event. Charlene Ann: “Weighing in at 233 pounds, from Berlin, Germany, accompanied by Dr. Bill, Baron Von Munchke! His opponent…” Von Munchke grimaces when the crowd boos him.
*Bobby Bare’s Tequila Sheila begins to play*
Suave: “And here comes the American Trucker being led to the ring by Tequila Sheila.”
Pour me another Tequila Sheila,
Take off that red satin dress
I cross the border and I beat the dealer
For all the damn gold in Juarez.
I feel like old Pancho Villa, Sheila
And sure could use a friend (I got Pesso to spend)
So pour me another Tequilla Sheila
And lay down n’love me again.
Though I can tell you about it
But don’t mind my gun by the bed
I feel kind of naked without it
And it eases the fear in my head.
Just pass me the salt n’the lemon
Bend down n’blow out the light
I never had trusted the woman
But Sheila I’ll trust you tonight.
Chorus:
Pour me another Tequila Sheila
Take off that red satin dress
I cross the border and I beat the dealer
Dor all the damn gold in Juarez.
I feel like old Pancho Villa, Sheila
And sure could use a friend (I got Pesso to spend)
So pour me another Tequilla Sheila,
And lay down n’love me again..
Charlene Ann: “…weighing in at 225 pounds, from Gary, Indiana, a member of American Heartland Coalition, accompanied by Tequila Sheila, American Trucker!!!”
MAIN EVENT:
‘The King of Old School Gimmicks’ Baron Von Munchke w/Dr. Bill (Old School Kings)
vs.
American Trucker w/Tequila Sheila (American Heartland Coalition) …Suave: “Von Munchke with a short lariat and puts the American Trucker to the mat. Von Munchke slides down and tries to grapevine American Trucker’s arm. Trucker pulls the arm back and slides away. Both men now circling each other. They lock up. American Trucker shoves Von Munchke back…spinning back kick on Von Munchke! American Trucker with a waistlock…belly to belly suplex! He covers…1 …2…NO! Von Munchke slips out! Kick to the face by American Trucker. Von Munchke pushes back. He pins American Trucker against the ropes and…CHOKES HIM WITH HIS FOREARM!TEQUILA SHEILA UP ON THE APRON…SHE GETS PUSHED OFF BY VON MUNCHKE. FIREMAN’S CARRY BY VON MUNCHKE…AND HE SLAMS HIM TO THE GROUND! NOW DR. BILL UP ON THE APRON WITH HIS…BIONIC ARM…whatever…HE SWINGS…TRUCKER DUCKS!” Von Munchke gets the full force of the steel enhanced punch. American Trucker with new life…slingshot elbow drop to Von Munchke. American Trucker rains down punches now. Headscissors takeover on Von Munchke. Von Munchke lifted up…JAKE BRAKE! JAKE BRAKE! American Trucker covers…1 …2 …3!”
WINNER: AMERICAN TRUCKER in 11:55
Suave: “AMERICAN TRUCKER WINS AND BARON VON MUNCHKE IS PISSED! HE’S GLARING AT DR. BILL AND I WOULDN’T WANT TO BE IN HIS SHOES RIGHT NOW! WE’LL SEE YOU NEXT WEEK!”
Posted on November 1, 2009 by Political Championship Wrestling
10/31-PCW EXTREME POLITICAL TV ON P-SPAN
From the Kokomo Civic Theater Kokomo, Indiana HOST: Johnny Suave
THIS WEEK ON PCW EXTREME POLITICAL TV: -PCW Champion ‘Hollywood A-List’ Stone Chism confronts Starz N. Stripes
-Movie Classic returns
-A battle between television giants: NCISF’d vs. The Extreme Weather Network
-PCW’s latest rookie sensation Bird ‘The Mark’ Ridfych in action against former PCW Television Champion ‘King of Old School Gimmicks’ Baron Von Munchke
-The WWR’s A. Kuluha Bacardi has an announcement
-Review of PCW Tag Team TV Tournament
-Khalid El of the Axis of Evil in action
-Hunter the Hunter and NRA (SarahPAC) vs. The Green World Order
Johnny Suave stands in the ring with the PCW Champion ‘Hollywood A-List’ Stone Chism. Crowd: “PCW!…PCW!…PCW!” Suave: “WELCOME TO PCW EXTREME POLITICAL TV…ON P-SPAN! I’M JOHNNY SUAVE AND IT IS MY PLEASURE TO INTRODUCE TO YOU, THE PCW CHAMPION, THE HOLLYWOOD A-LIST, STONE CHISM!”Crowd: “BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” Chism: “How? How can YOU boo ME? I’m a star! You love me.”Crowd: “BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” Suave: “I’m sure it has nothing to do with this.”
REPLAY: 10/7-PCW EXTREME POLITICAL TV
Chism: “Now, before we have this six man tag team match here tonight. I want Starz N. Stripes to come out here so we can have a little man to man talk.” Starz walks out a few seconds later. Chism: “Starz. Look, I know you’re a good wrestler. I’m glad you’re on my team. But there can only be one ’star’ leading the Progressive Alliance and, well, that’s me. You need to do the right thing on October 18th at PCW-MVW Lock and Load 4. Now, I was going to show the ‘I Pledge’ tape to you again tonight. But instead, I’ve come up with something better. This is what I want you to do, Starz.”
Eva Mendes comes to the ring. Mendes: “I pledge to lay down in support of Stone Chism.” Mendes lays down. Chism: “See? It’s that easy.” Cameron Diaz is next. Diaz: “I pledge to do the right thing and lay down for Stone Chism, the PCW Champion.” Diaz lays down in the ring. Courtney Cox climbs into the ring. Cox: “I pledge to do the right thing. I will lay down for our PCW Champion Stone Chism.” Cox lays down. Next, Ashton Kutcher and Demi Moore. Suave: “Okay, I think I’m going to be sick now.” Kutcher and Moore: “I pledge to be a servant to our PCW Champion. Kutcher: “And don’t forget all mankind.” Moore: “Oh…right.”
Chism: “So, Starz. What’s it going to be? All you have to do on October 18th is…lay down. One. Two. Three.” Starz simply stares at the PCW Champion and doesn’t respond.
REPLAY: 10/7-PCW EXTREME POLITICAL TV ‘No Frills’ Chris Escondido, Starz N. Stripes, and ‘Hollywood A-Lister’ Stone Chism (Progressive Alliance) vs. Midnite Rockin’ Xpress-Bobby Ricky Michaels and Marty Gibson-Lane and ‘King of Old School Gimmicks’ Baron Von Munchke (Old School Kings) Chism clotheslines Starz N. Stripes. Suave: “CHISM JUST ATTACKED STARZ AND STRIPES!” Chism grabs a waist lock and Belly to Belly Suplexes Starz down onto the chair!! Suave: “HOLY CRAP!” Chism sets the chair up. Pedigree! Chism smashes Starz’s face right into the chair!
Marty Gibson-Lane sets a chair on Escondido….450 Splash onto the chair! The ref starts the count. …1 …2 …3
Chism: “Oh…that. Look, people. The reality is that in life, people have their places. Your’s is sitting out there. Mine is…well…right here being your PCW Champion. And Starz N. Stripes? It’s laying down for a fellow member of the Progressive Alliance. So, Starz? If you’re in the building. Here’s your chance to do what’s right. Come on down.” The crowd gasps when Starz, eyes wrapped in gauze, is slowly led to the ring by his tag team partner ‘No Frills’ Chris Escondido. Chism waits expectantly as Escondido helps Starz into the ring. Chism: “Now, Starz. Everyone feels bad about what happened to you at the hands of the Axis of Evil. But it still doesn’t relieve you of your obligation to pay proper homage to me, the PCW Champion. So, even in your blinded state, you can do the right thing now and lay down for me.” Starz calls for a microphone and Charlene Ann Beckworth, the ring announcer, hands him one. Starz: “Chism, let me get this straight.” Escondido turns him to face Chism. Starz: “Oh…Chism, let me get this straight. After you took me a few weeks back and then my tag team partner and co-holder of the PCW Tag Team title, Chris Escondido, you still expect me to do the j-o-b for you? Hell no!” The crowd cheers; Chism throws a fit.
Chism: “No, no, no. That’s not the way it’s supposed to go. *I* am a member of the Hollywood Elite. I am the PCW Champion. I am a star. You, are just a Captain America wannabe with none of my charisma or star power. No one cares that your poor eyes got burned. What they do care about is making me happy. And nothing would make me happier than you accepting your place in the food chain and-” Escondido takes the Tag Team Title belt and blasts Chism in the mush with it.Suave: “ESCONDIDO JUST DECKED THE CHAMPION!” Immediately, the Hollywood Left pour out to the ring: George Clooney, Susan Sarandon, Tim Robbins, Sean Penn, Michael Moore, Matt Damon, and Alec Baldwin. They attack Escondido. Suave: “SEVEN AGAINST ONE! HOW FAIR IS THAT?” No one notices Starz N. Stripes slowly unwrapping the gauze from his eyes. Suave: “WAIT! HERE COMES THE AMERICAN HEARTLAND COALITION!” American Trucker, Dave the Mechanic, Average Joe, SNAFU, and Tequila Sheila race down. Starz’s eyes are totally unwrapped and he calls for a chair. Tequila Sheila obliges and slides it in under the bottom rope. Suave: “WAIT! STARZ CAN SEE! STARZ CAN SEE? *CLANG* CHAIRSHOT TO GEORGE CLOONEY. *CLANG* CHAIRSHOT TO TIM ROBBINS! *CLANG* CHAIRSHOT TO MATT DAMON!” Trucker, Dave, Joe, and SNAFU whip Michael Moore into the ropes. Tequila Sheila pulls the top rope down and Moore goes Ric Flair over the top rope except he misses the ring apron and crashes to the floor.
The Innovator of Extreme Broadcast Excellence Rush Limbaugh leads a charge down the aisle with Sean Hannity, Michelle Malkin, The Queen of Extreme Ann Coulter, and Glenn Beck right behind him. They go right for the PCW Champion and begin to stomp away at him. Beck gets a couple cheap shots in on Baldwin, Starz turns and blasts Beck with the steel chair. *CLANG* Down goes Hannity. *CLANG* Ann Coulter. *CLANG* Limbaugh. *CLANG* Ann Coulter again. *CLANG* *CLANG* *CLANG* Ann Coulter again.
PCW Security flock to the ring to break up the brawl. Suave: “LET’S GO TO A COMMERCIAL WHILE THEY TRY TO CLEAN THIS MESS UP!”
Suave: “WHILE WE WERE GONE, KHALID-EL AND THE AXIS OF EVIL CAME OUT AND CLEARED THE RING! STONE CHISM MADE HIS ESCAPE BEFORE KHALID-EL COULD GET HIS HANDS ON HIM. KHALID-EL NOW WANTS TO MAKE AN EXAMPLE OF SOMEONE. WHO’S THE LUCKY VICTIM?”
Charlene Ann Beckworth in the ring. Charlene Ann: “In the ring already, from the Axis of Evil, accompanied by Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, he is KHALID-EL!” Khalid-El glares at the crowd. Charlene Ann: “And his opponent, coming to the ring.” Jobber the Hut and Movie Classic literally have to drag Dick Van Dam to the ring. Charlene Ann: “He is DVD, DICK VAN DAM!” Crowd: “CANNON FODDER! (clap clap clap-clap-clap), CANNON FODDER! (clap clap clap-clap-clap).”
MATCH #1
Dick Van Dam w/Movie Classic (Island of Misfit Wrestlers)
vs.
Khalid-El w/Mahmoud Ahmadinejad (Axis of Evil)
Suave: “So, it’ll be Khalid-El versus a slightly reluctant Dick Van Dam in our first match of the night. Jobber the Hut has a death grip on DVD’s arm and won’t let go. Movie Classic climbs into the ring. Movie Classic: “DVD. I totally understand why you don’t want to face this monster over there. But don’t do it for me. You see, the longer I live, the more convincing proofs I see of this truth, that God governs in the affairs of men. And if a sparrow cannot fall to the ground without His notice, is it probable that an empire can rise without his aid? We have been assured, Sir, in the Sacred Writings, that ‘except the Lord build the House, they labor in vain that build it. Were my soul trembling on the wing of eternity, were this hand freezing to death, were my voice choking with the last struggle, I would still, with the last gasp of that voice, implore you to remember the truth: God has given America to be free. And whereas it is the duty of nations as well as of men, to own their dependence upon the overruling power of God, to confess their sins and transgressions, in humble sorrow, yet with assured hope that genuine repentance will lead to mercy and pardon; and to recognize the sublime truth, announced in the Holy Scriptures and proven by all history, that those nations only are blessed whose God is the Lord. Let us look forward to the time when we can take the flag of our country and nail it below the Cross, and there let it wave as it waved in the olden times, and let us gather around it and inscribed for our motto: ‘Liberty and Union, one and inseparable, now and forever,’ and exclaim, ‘Christ first, our country next!’”
DVD: “Fine…I’ll do it.” Suave: “Hell, after that stirring rendition of famous quotes from Ben Franklin, Patrick Henry, Abe Lincoln, and Andy Johnson, I might even climb inside the ring!” The bell sounds. Khalid-El walks to the middle of the ring. Kick to the stomach of DVD. Lift. F-5. Cover. One…two…three. Suave: “On second thought, maybe not.”
WINNER: KHALID-EL in :23
Suave: “At least we got a good speech out of it.”
————————–
BACKSTAGE- ANITA DUNN
Cut to Paige McGillicutty in the back.
Paige: “With me now is Anita Dunn, head of the A.D.D. movement. Anita, you want to refute some charges that have arisen over the past week about PCW CEO Barack Obama’s connection to High Octane Wrestling’s Lee Best, who’s right now sitting in a Chicago jail.” Anita: “Yes, Paige. I just want to reiterate that everything that’s being alleged is…totally Fox News’s fault. That’s right, instead of wasting my time and the PCW CEO’s time, you should be investigating Fox News.” Paige: “Um. What does Fox News have to do with Obama’s friendship with Lee Best?” Anita: “Fox News isn’t even a real news organization. They’re the propaganda arm of the Republican Party.” Paige: “Oh. Like MSNBC is for the Democrats?” Anita: “What did you say?” Paige: “Never mind. So, what you’re arguing is that we should ignore any possible connection between a man sitting in jail right now and the PCW CEO simply because you don’t like Fox News.” Anita: “That pretty much sums it up, Paige.” Paige: ‘Okay. I’m Paige McGillicutty in the back. Let’s send it to Johnny Suave.”
Suave: “Thanks Paige. A. Kuluha Bacardi of the World eWrestling Rag is also in the back with our own Gina Ramsey. Gigi?”
BACKSTAGE- A. KULUHA BACARDI
Gina: “Thanks Johnny. With me is A. Kuluha Bacardi who is here to make a big announcement. A? Go ahead.” AKB: “Thanks Gigi. I am here tonight to announce that the WWR will be holding it’s second supershow on December the 20th from the Island of Puerto De Macoris. We’re hoping to get attract wrestlers from many different federations for this show. PCW will have a match or two. I’m sure the Missouri Valley Wrestling Association will have a match. I’m hoping that this time we can branch out a little farther.” Gina: “Okay, so in less than two months, the WWR holds its second supershow down at the Island of Puerto De Macoris. Johnny?” Suave: “Thanks, Gina. The first supershow was a huge success. I can’t wait for the second one. Back to the ring.”
MATCH #2
Hunter the Hunter and NRA w/’The Alaskan Pitbull’ Sarah Palin (SarahPAC)
vs.
GreenPete and “Extreme Vegan” Brock Cole Lee w/PeaceNick and Peta from PETA (The Green World Order)
The bell rings. Hunter the Hunter and NRA hit stereo corner clotheslines on their opponents. Double team lift…double sidewalk slam on GreenPete. Lee charges. SarahPAC sidesteps a charging Lee and sends him to the floor. Hunter on the apron. He rushs and nails a running kick to the chest and face of GreenPete on the floor. Sounded very painful indeed. Hunter climbs to the top turnbuckle. Lee goes over and pulls Hunter down. Top rope bulldog by Lee to NRA. Lee pounds away at him while GreenPete holds off Hunter. NRA is back in and whacks GreenPete in the back with a chair. NRA facelocks Lee while Hunter goes top turnbuckle. Lee runs NRA into the ropes and in the process, crotches Hunter. GreenPete on the offense. Tilt-a-whirl backbreaker on NRA, Russian leg sweep by Lee on Hunter, snap mare and chinlock by GreenPete to NRA and a basement dropkick to Hunter by Lee.
Suave: “Fast paced action here.” GreenPete climbs the turnbuckle now while Lee matches up with Hunter. Sarah Palin up on the apron and pushes GreenPete off, NRA helps him up and then flings him through the ropes to the floor. Double team on GreenPete. NRA puts GreenPete iupside down in the corner. Suave: “HE’S TIED TO THE TREE OF WOE!” Palin in the ring with a chair. She runs towards GreenPete. A younger man hits the ring and clotheslines Palin. Suave: “HOLY CRAP! THAT’S LEVI JOHNSTON!” Johnston kicks away at Palin. Hunter forearm shivers him from behind. He puts him in a superplex position. Wham! GreenPete back in the ring and hits a sit down slam on Hunter. GreenPete gets a boot to each member of SarahPAC. Springboard missile dropkick by Lee to Hunter! SUPERKICK to Lee by NRA! DRAGON SUPLEX by GreenPete!! Enziguiri by Hunter to GreenPete, followed by a tornado DDT! STIFF clothesline by Lee to Hunter! Superkick to NRA. Double team inverted powerbomb/Cutter by GreenPete and Lee. GreenPete slaps on a Boston Crab to Hunter. NRA in to break the hold. Springboard clothesline/powerbomb combo by SarahPAC. Palin crawls out of the ring. She grabs Hunter’s bear trap and puts it in the corner. Johnston gets up and starts yelling at Palin. Hunter pushes him from behind and *SNAP* Suave: “BEAR TRAP! BEAR TRAP!” Johnston screams out as the pain shoots up from his foot. PeaceNick and Peta are horrified and immediately come to Johnston’s aid.
Lee also distracted by Johnston’s plight. NRA slips in and scoops Lee up. Suave: “GUN RACK! GUN RACK!” NRA puts max pressure on Lee’s back. GreenPete gets atomic dropped by Hunter. Lee taps out.
WINNER: NRA and Hunter the Hunter in 9:14
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MISSOURI VALLEY WRESTLING ASSOCIATION
Taking Women’s E-Wrestling to a Whole Different Level
MATCH #3
Andrew DiNozio and Jim McGee w/Larry Jeffrey Gibbs (NCISF’d)
vs.
Steve Abrams and Mike Bettis w/Jim Frascantore (Extreme Weather Network)
Suave: “This ought to be fun. NCISF’d debuted over the weekend on PCW House Shows and looked very impressive. The Extreme Weather Network has taken offense as they claim to be the premier TV based Tag Team in PCW.”
(the bell rings)
Suave: “It’ll be DiNozio and Bettis to start.” They circle. Lock up. DiNozio tries for a Ace Crusher but Bettis blocks. DiNozio turns to McGee. DiNozio: “You try, proby.” McGee: “What?” Gibbs: “Just get in the damn ring!” DiNozio tags in McGee. Bettis punches McGee repeatedly. Bettis makes the tag to Abrams. Bettis with an exploder suplex on McGee. Bettis executes a spinning DDT, planting McGee’s head in the mat. McGee gets bounced off of the ropes and hit with a backdrop diver by Bettis. McGee Russian Leg Sweeps Bettis. Bettis bounces right back up and puts McGee in the double underhook position. Double underhook backbreaker. Bettis sucks chants start in the crowd. Bettis throws McGee to the floor. Zavida Zavid over. She karate chops Bettis. Side headlock into an inverted DDT. McGee is back on his feet and takes advantage by punching Bettis repeatedly. McGee puts his hand on Bettis’s forehead. Suave: “CLAWHOLD!” Gibbs: “Clawhold?” DiNozio: “Really. That move is so 1950′s. Back in your time, Gibbs” *WHAP* DiNozio has been Gibbs’d. Bettis back on the ring apron. He nails McGee with a huge slingshot sommersault splash. Zavid over to help again. Steve Abrams goes top turnbuckle. Senton on Zavid! Crowd: “PCW!…PCW!…PCW!” Bettis drags McGee up the aisle. An ardent Weather Network fan hands him a chair. *CLANG* That pisses off the NCISF’d fans. Gibbs directs DiNozio to give McGee a hand. DiNozio claps. *WHAP* DiNozio gets Gibbs’d again. DiNozio with a chair. *CLANG* Bettis down. DiNozio drags McGee back to ringside. Abrams sneers at DiNozio as he goes up and helps Bettis back to the ring.
Bettis and McGee both back into the ring. Bettis stomps McGee’s head. Suave: “Abrams, who did absolutely nothing save a Senton on Zavida, tags back in Bettis for Extreme Weather Network. And Bettis has been doing all the work.” Double axhandle chop from Bettis. Suave: “And proby…I mean McGee really needs a tag. Wait! McGee’s back up He’s got a side headlock on Bettis!” McGee DDT’s Bettis. Bettis comes right back. He scoops McGee up… running powerslam! McGee rolls out to the floor. Gibbs turns to his team. Gibbs: “Do I have answers yet on how to beat these guys?” Abby is feverishly working away on the forensics side. Darryl Dukey Malliard offers a couple hypothesis’s. Meanwhile, McGee gets a huge gutbuster on Bettis. They lockup. McGee sends Bettis to the steel barricade. McGee hits a spinning leg lariat on Bettis sending him over the barricade into the crowd. One of the Weather Network fans throws a cup of beer in McGee’s face. Abrams over…he lifts and nails a front-layout suplex on McGee. Bettis is up and climbs over the barricade. Zavida over to hit him with a back fist. Suave: “Wild action back and forth. AND WAIT A MINUTE! THE ULTIMATE, THRILL-SEEKING, DEATH-DEFYING, LAY IT ALL OUT THERE, JIM FRASCANTORE IS ON THE TOP TURNBUCKLE!” Frascantore jumps. Zavida greets him with a thrust kick that nearly takes his head off. Suave: “Well, so much for that.”
Zavida German suplexes Bettis thru a table! McGee gets back to his feet and climbs in the ring. Zavida kicks Bettis in the groin and drags him back to the ring. McGee tags in DiNozio. DiNozio comes from behind and bulldogs Bettis. Bettis back up and tries to line him up for a cradle suplex. DiNozio reverses. Bettis reverses right back and wraps his legs around DiNozio’s neck. Suave: “Figure-four sleeper. Ron Martin is checking for a tap out.” Gibbs finally has enough and stomps on Bettis making him break the hold. Bettis back to his corner and brings in Abrams. Abby and Dukey run up to Gibbs with the solution. DiNozio puts Abrams in an arm grapevine. McGee goes airborne and hits Abrams with an elbowdrop from the second turnbuckle. Abrams is back on his feet. DiNozio tries for a tilt-a-whirl suplex but Abrams escapes out. DiNozio takes Abrams down with a knee. DiNozio wraps his arms around Abrams for a belly-to-back suplex but Abrams sits out and blocks it. DiNozio tries for a springboard DDT but Abrams slips out of the side headlock and whips him to the ropes. Gibbs again jumps in and clotheslines Abrams. Gibbs kicks Abrams in the stomach and executes the sitdown face slam. Zavida does a cartwheel and kicks Abrams in the face. DiNozio tags in McGee. McGee mule kicks Abrams. Abrams is up again. McGee makes the tag back to DiNozio. Abrams gouges DiNozio’s eyes. Bettis in the ring- he superkicks DiNozio. Gibbs in again. He flattens Bettis with a clothesline. DiNozio sends Abrams to the corner of the ring. Zavida clocks Abrams from behind and sends him back out towards DiNozio. DiNozio thrust kicks Abrams in the head. DiNozio covers Abrams hooking the leg. Ron Martin makes the count. …1 …2 …3
WINNER: NCISF’d in 16:33
Suave: “An impressive statement made by NCISF’d. And it looks like Gibbs has something to say.” Gibbs: “Let it be known that if you mess with NCIS, you’re going to get ******.” Gibbs throws down the microphone and leaves.
———————————
PCW RANKINGS:
PCW WORLD CHAMPION: ‘Hollywood A-Lister’ Stone Chism (Progressive Alliance)
CONTENDERS:
#1- Starz N. Stripes (Progressive Alliance)
#2- Big Oil (American Patriots)
#3- Khalid-El (Axis of Evil)
#4- ‘The New Rookie Sensation’ O’Beck Bahama (Progressive Alliance)
#5- A. Tom Bomb (American Patriots)
PCW TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS: ‘No Frills’ Chris Escondido and Starz N. Stripes (Progressive Alliance) CONTENDERS:
#1- Midnite Rockin’ Xpress- Bobby Ricky Michaels/Marty Gibson-Lane (Old School Kings)
#2- Extreme Weather Network-Steve Abrams/Mike Bettis (EWN)
#3- Jack and Bull Schett (Ron Paul’s New Libertarian Army)
#4- Cadillac and Jaguar (Total Eliminators)
#5- Grizzly Adam/Hunter the Hunter (SarahPAC)
PCW TELEVISION CHAMPION:SNAFU (Independent) CONTENDERS: #1-’The King of Old School Gimmicks’ Baron Von Munchke (Old School Kings)
#2- Bird ‘The Mark’ Ridfych (Independent)
#3- Newt Tron Bomb (American Patriots)
#4- American Trucker (American Heartland Coalition)
#5. NRA (SarahPAC)
——————————
UPCOMING PCW EVENTS: 11/4- PCW House Show
11/7- PCW Extreme Political TV on P-SPAN
11/11- PCW House Show
11/14- PCW Extreme Political TV on P-SPAN
11/18- PCW House Show
11/21- PCW Extreme Political TV on P-SPAN
11/25- PCW House Show
11/28- PCW Extreme Political TV on P-SPAN
———————————-
Dr. Bill in the ring to a loud symphony of boos. Dr. Bill: “SHUT UP! IT’S NOT ABOUT YOOOU. You don’t make filet magnon and expect it to taste like meatloaf. SNAFU, you are not filet magnon by any stretch. If it weren’t for your meddling manager Dawn McGill, and those criminal reprobates and from High Octane Wrestling Lee Best and Kirsta Lewis, Baron Von Munchke would still be the PCW Television Champion.” Crowd: “FRIEND FOR DINNER! (clap clap clap-clap-clap), FRIEND FOR DINNER! (clap clap clap-clap-clap)” Dr. Bill: “OH SHUT UP!”
MATCH #4
Bird ‘The Mark’ Ridfych (Independent)
vs.
‘The King of Old School Gimmicks’ Baron Von Munchke w/Dr. Bill (Old School Kings)
Suave: “Big match here. If Bird can pull off a win here, he’ll get a shot at the PCW Television Title.” (the bell rings) Suave: “Here we go.” Ridfych comes out quickly and short lariats Von Munchke. Ridfych measures Von Munchke up and throws a closed fist. Crowd: “FASTBALL!” Ridfych with another punch. Crowd: “FASTBALL!” Ridfych winds up and throws a wicked hook. Crowd: “SLIDER!” Now Von Munchke takes charge with his own right hand. He spins Ridfych around- inverted atomic drop. Ridfych is clotheslined down by the former champion. Suave: “Von Munchke drags Ridfych to the floor. Neck snap to Ridfych. Von Munchke nails Ridfych with a belly-to-back suplex.” Von Munchke throws Ridfych into the steel barricade. He hits Bird with a splash. Von Munchke drags him up and sets him for a dragon suplex. He lift Ridfych up. Ridfych flips through.
Ridfych legsweeps Von Munchke. Ridfych move back into the ring. Ridfych gets caught with an elbowsmash to the face. Von Munchke punches Ridfych in the head. Von Munchke puts Ridfych on the top rope. Superplex attempt is foiled. Ridfych pushes Von Munchke off the top turnbuckle. Ridfych goes for a pin. The ref starts the count. …1 Von Munchke escapes. Ridfych climbs to the top turnbuckle. Dr. Bill over…chops Ridfych. Ridfych gets drilled with an inverted back breaker. Ridfych stands up. Ridfych nails Von Munchke with a belly-to-back suplex. Ridfych gets back to his feet. Ridfych covers Von Munchke hooking the leg. The ref starts the count. …1 Von Munchke escapes. Ridfych with a right hand. Crowd: “FASTBALL!” And another. Crowd: “FASTBALL!” Again, he winds up and drops the hammer on Von Munchke. Crowd: “FAAAAAST-BALL!” Ridfych gut-wrenchs Von Munchke. Ridfych thrust kicks Von Munchke in the head. Ridfych goes for a pin. Referee Ron Martin makes the count. …1 …2 …3
WINNER: BIRD ‘THE MARK’ RIDFYCH in 5:54
Suave: “He does it! Bird ‘The Mark’ Ridfych defeats former PCW Television Champion Baron Von Munchke and he will get a title shot against SNAFU. That’s all for this week. I’m Johnny Suave. We’ll see you next Saturday.”
