Romney a Wimp?/Boris Johnson Hung Up/And oh yeah, Pippa- PCW Goes NBC Tape Delay

PCW Politics is War on P-SPAN Recap- NBC Tape Delay Version
Thursday July 26th, 2012
O2 Arena
London, England
Announcer: ‘The Voice of PCW’ Johnny Suave

Big show.  Two number one contender’s matches.

Tag Team:
Big Union: ‘The Self Described Savior of the Middle Class’ Big Labor and James the Jeep Worker (D) vs. Corporate Might: Big Oil and Kirk Walstreit (R)
-winner faces PCW Tag Team Champions Scott Walker’s Rangers (R) at PCW Night of Champions

PCW Title:
PCW Blue Brand Champion Triple R (D) vs. PCW Red Brand Champion ‘The Japanese SuperDestroyer’ Yamamoto Tanaka (R)
-winner meets PCW Champion The Sanderman (D) at Night of Champions

Hour One

Commemorating PCW’s first ever trip overseas,  London Mayor Boris Johnson came in over the O2 Arena on a zip line.  Only one problem.

“Erm…could someone give me a push?”

While Mayor Johnson hung in the air over the ring, PCW CEO Barack Obama (D-IL) came to the ring with his aide de camp Joe ‘The Big F’n Deal’ Biden (D-DE) to address a pair of topics.

First, the PCW Women’s Title.  Obama doesn’t remember new women’s champion Jill Berg (R) being booked in the match.  He doesn’t know how she ended up in the match.  But somehow, she left with the PCW Women’s title.

Replay: 3 Way Dance for PCW Women’s Title
Dawn McGill vs. Miss USA vs. Code Pink (D)

Jill Berg hits the ring from the crowd.  She rolls in…

Suave: BUZZSAW KICK TO  CODE PINK.  SPEAR TO EMILY S LIST!

JILLLL-BERG chants start.  Golatta turns to Triple R.  He rears back with his right hand…FOUL POLE!

Suave: HOLY CRAP!

Triple R drops to his knees and crumples over.  Jill Berg covers McGill.  1…2…3.   Berg covers Code Pink.

Suave: I DON’T BELIEVE IT!

Pelosi and O’Neill try to get into the ring but Golatta blocks their way.  1…2…3!

WINNER  @ 21:05 AND NEW PCW WOMEN’S CHAMPION: Jill Berg (R)

Obama says he’ll deal with Golatta later.  He could cry like the Mitt Romney campaign has been crying over Bain (D)…

Bain- a business created by Bain & Company, uses its extensive network, sector expertise and business screening capabilities to identify attractive small to mid-cap investment opportunities for its private equity investment partners.

Not…

Bane- (legally trademarked character of Marvel Comics)

…wreaking havoc with the Republicans.  But he’s not that kind of guy.  Instead, Obama makes another ‘executive decision’ and books Jill Berg to face Code Pink at PCW Night of Champions in less than two weeks to settle the PCW Women’s Title.

Next on the agenda, Obama addresses what happened after the match…

McGill: Ladies and gentlemen, there are good people in this room who’ve been left behind as Democrats and Republicans both run PCW at their expense.  They don’t want two parties to dominate PCW against the greater good.  They don’t want political gamesmanship to trump doing what’s right for everyone.  They don’t want PCW partisanship to keep them off the Red Brand and Blue Brand tours and away from opportunities to win title belts.  If this is the path that both factions lead us, then the Democrats and Republican can both KISS MY ASS!

The crowd roars when McGill throws the former television title belt on the mat. McGill kneels and puts masking tape on the belt.  Then she takes the sharpie and writes on it.

McGill: Let the Republicans and Democrats take their titles.  Tonight is a night that I draw a line in the sand. Tonight, I start a revolution that will bring back common sense to PCW and stop putting Democrats and Republicans above all else.  Tonight, let the new era begin: the era of a PCW of the people, by the people, and for the people.  The era of the PCW Heartland Title!

Obama wants to know who Dawn McGill thinks she is.  The belt belongs to PCW and he intends to get it back.  Obama brings out Eric Holder and the Department of Justice (D).   Holder pledges to retrieve the old Television belt back from McGill and tells the DoJ to go after her.

Obama tells Holder to wait and brings out some additional muscle in the form of the Chicago Boss Squad: Charlie Ranck and Pete Fyle (D).  Holder, the DoJ, and the CBS then leave.

(1 )Big Union: ‘The Self-Described Savior of the Middle Class’ Big Labor and James the Jeep Worker (D) def. Corporate Might: Big Oil and Kirk Walstreit in the first #1 contender’s match of the night

As promised, Eric Holder’s Department of Justice (D) did most of the heavy lifting in this match and cleared the way for Big Union’s victory and a title shot against PCW Tag Team Champions Scott Walker’s Rangers: John and Ronnie Walker (R) at PCW Night of Champions.

PCW Investigative Reporter Woodward Bernstein interviews Attorney Wick Sollers, representing former Penn State football coach Joe Paterno‘s family.   Sollers states the Paternos want to appeal the NCAA’s penalties against Penn State, the community, and most of all, Joe Paterno’s legacy.

Joe Paterno Family Demands Appeal of Sanctions- ESPN

Sollers:
“This matter may be the most important disciplinary action in the history of the NCAA, and it has been handled in a fundamentally inappropriate and unprecedented manner.   To severely punish a University and its community and to condemn a great educator, philanthropist and coach without any public review or hearing is unfair on its face and a violation of NCAA guidelines.”

*Def Leppard’s Tear It Down plays*

‘The Extreme Equalizer’ Whiskey Tango Foxtrot

Suave: IT’S THE EXTREME EQUALIZER- WHISKEY TANGO FOXTROT!

Tear it down – There’s got to be a better way
Tear it down – I can’t wait another day
Tear it down – There’s got to be a better way
Tear it down – If only you could stay
All night long

Crowd: What the @#$#!…What the @!##!

Extreme Equalizer Whiskey Tango Foxtrot races down the aisle to the ring.  Sollers tries to escape but WTF pulls him back to the middle of the ring

Kick to the balls.  Lift.  Chokeslam.

Crowd: PCW!…PCW!…PCW!…

WTF then calls for a pair of tables.   He sets them up on top of each other in the ring.  He lifts Sollers up and climbs to the top turnbuckle in the corner.  WTF then powerbombs Sollers through both tables.

Crowd: PCW!…PCW!…PCW!…

Jay Paterno then runs out.  Kick to the balls.  Lift.  Chokeslam.

Crowd: PCW!…PCW!…PCW!…

(2) Code Pink and Emily S List (D) def. the Cheatin’ Indonesian Badminton Team

For some reason, the Cheatin’ Indonesian Badminton Team didn’t put forth a lot of effort to win the match- it was almost like they were deliberately losing on purpose.  Pink gets the Fickle Finger of Doom at 15 seconds into the match to get the pinfall and the win.

Next, the ‘Alaskan Pitbull’ Sarah Palin (R-AK) walks down the ramp like a baseball food vendor with a box full of Chic-Fil-A chicken to hawk.

(3) Starz N. Stripes (R) def. ‘The Asset’ Lou Jason Bourne

‘The Asset,’ over 300 pounds, big bellied, and clearly past his prime, sparkles for the first two seconds of the match before Starz puts him away with the American Stars and Fujiwara ArmBar.

Hour Two

Actor Clint Eastwood hits the ring and declares his support for ‘The Massachusetts Red Blood’ Mitt Romney.

Eastwood Attends Romney Fund Raiser- Washington Post

Eastwood:
“In the early 2000s, I was making the film ‘Mystic River’ in Massachusetts.  At that time, Gov. Romney was running for governor.  I said, ‘God, this guy is too handsome to be governor, but he does look like he could be the PCW CEO.’ As the years have gone by, I’m beginning to think even more so that. He’s going to restore a decent tax system that we need badly so that there is a fairness and people are not pitted against one another of whose paying taxes and who isn’t.”

Romney then joins Eastwood in the ring and heartily shakes his hand.  Then porn star Jenna Jameson runs in and joins them.

Jameson:
“Mitt Romney is a politician who I can embrace!”

Jameson then tries to embrace Romney who quickly slides under the ropes and high tails it from the ring.

Newsweek’s Michael Tomasky runs out.

Tomasky: See?  SEE!  I told you Romney was a wimp!

Suave: “Not sure I would have run away…from that…she is a porn star you know.”

Meanwhile…

“Seriously…could someone please give me a push?”

While below…

Pippa Middleton dances for the PCW crowd.

All is well.

(4) The SoCal Clones: Trapper Silk Iafrate from Sierra Madre and Bugaha Bill the Cabinatlion w/Jim Rahm def. The Goatbusters

What do you get when you combine the jungle gloss of sports talk host Jim Rome with the over the top profanity of Rahm Emanuel?  Jim Rahm.

Rahm: Hello London.  What the **** is up?  This is ****ing EPIC!  ****ing rack me!”

*Spooky music begins followed by a funky beat*

(sung to ‘Ghostbusters’)
If there’s something grazing
In your neighborhood
Who you gonna call
(Goatbusters)
If you see a herd
And it don’t look good
Who you gonna call
(Goatbusters)

I ain’t afraid of no Goat
I ain’t afraid of no Goat

If you’re seeing horns
Running through your yard
Who can you call
(Goatbusters)
If you have a goat
Sleeping in your bed
Oh, who you gonna call
(Goatbusters)

I ain’t afraid of no Goat
I ain’t afraid of no Goat

Who you gonna call
(Goatbusters)
If you’re all alone
Pick up the phone
And call
(Goatbusters)

I ain’t afraid of no Goat
I hear it likes the girls
I ain’t afraid of no Goat
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah

Who you gonna call
(Goatbusters)
If you’ve had a dose
Of a freaky Goat
Maybe you’d better call
(Goatbusters)

Let me tell you something
Bustin’ makes me feel good

I ain’t afraid of no Goat
I ain’t afraid of no Goat

The Goatbusters hit the ring and waste no time attacking the SoCal Clones.  But the Clones do not get run- they get racked…or more succinctly, Bugaha Bill puts Ray Scantz  in the rack for the submission win.

Rahm: RACK ME.  I’M ****ING OUT!

In the event you missed this…and you pretty much have to be living in a cave to have missed this…

Main Event- #1 Contender’s Match for the PCW Title
PCW Red Brand Champion ‘The Japanese SuperDestroyer’ Yamamoto Tanaka (R)
vs.
PCW Blue Brand Champion Triple R (D)

Everyone’s out to watch the match.  Harry Reid and Nancy Pelosi for the Democrats.  Mitch McConnell and John Boehner for the Republicans.

Triple R repeated charges at Tanaka.  Tanaka uses his arsenal of big power moves to wear down the Blue Brand Champion.

Eric Holder and the Department of Justice (D) as well as Corporate Might: Big Oil and Kirk Walstreit repeatedly interfere in the match.  They are joined by the Angry Left Wing Bloggers (Daily Kos Markos Moulitsas, ‘The Professor’ Paul Krugman, and Katrina Vanden Heuvel of the Nation)  (D) and the Right Wing Brigadiers Glenn Beck, Laura Ingraham, and Rush Limbaugh (R) as both sides desperately try to win the match.

But in the end…

…Tanaka climbs to the top rope and nails Triple R with a reverse flying elbow drop.  Suave: HOLY CRAP!  Tanaka with a corkscrew legdrop and goes up top again- 5 Star Frog Splash.

The DoJ try to get to the ring but Corporate Might intercepts them.  The Left Wing Bloggers and Right Wing Brigadiers brawl up the ramp.  Tanaka pulls Triple R up to the top turnbuckle…JAPANESE SUPERDESTROYER!  Tanaka goes for the pin…1 …2 …3

WINNER: Yamamoto Tanaka @ 20:15

The outside brawls continue.  Tanaka celebrates in the ring with Mitt Romney and the Republican establishment.

PCW Champion The Sanderman (D) runs down with a chair and clocks Tanaka with it.  Romney et al scatter from the ring as the Sanderman blasts Tanaka again with another chairshot as the show ends.

PCW Night of Champions

Women’s Title Match:
Women’s Champion Jill Berg (R) vs. Code Pink (D)

Tag Team Title Match:
Tag Team Champions Scott Walker’s Rangers: John and Ronnie Walker (R) vs. Big Union:’The Self Described Savior of the Middle Class’  Big Labor and James the Jeep Worker (D)

PCW Title Match:
PCW Champion The Sanderman (D) vs. ‘The Japanese SuperDestroyer’ Yamamoto Tanaka (R)

Oh, and as the lights go down for the final time at the O2 Arena tonight…

“Hello?  Hello!  Anyone?…”

PCW Newsline: Rahm Emanuel Goes Back to Chicago

As the enforcer for the Democrats, Rahm Emanuel has been known to drop a few F-Bombs on his adversaries in PCW.

Now, CEO Barack Obama is on the lookout for his replacement as Emanuel has decided to return to the political battles of Chicago.  Emanuel was very effective over the past two years as Obama’s enforcer but now someone else will need to step up and take his place.  This past Monday night, that role fell onto the PCW Champion Yamamoto Tanaka (D) who made the save for Triple R when the Axis of Evil interfered his match against Iran’s Weapon of Mass Destruction Khalid-El.

Is Tanaka the full time solution?  No says PCW spokesman Robert Gibbs.  “CEO Obama and Democratic Leader Tim Kaine are well aware that we need to find someone to fill Rahm’s shoes.  The PCW Champion has enough on his plate as it is and will not be the Democrats full time enforcer.”

Stay tuned as this story develops.

——————

New PCW Rankings Released…

PCW WORLD CHAMPION: Yamamoto Tanaka (D)
PCW TELEVISION CHAMPION: Ken Worth-American Trucker (I-American Heartland)
PCW TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS: The Kings of Old School (D)

SINGLES CONTENDERS:
#1- Kevin Scott (R)
#2- Jill-Berg (R)
#3- Triple R (D)
#4- Stone Chism (D)
#5- Doug Kingman  (R)

TAG TEAM CONTENDERS:
#1- The International Hit Squad: ‘The Foul Pole’ Andy Golatta/Daniel-San (I)
#2- ‘No Frills’ Chris Escondido and Charlie Blackwell (I-American Heartland)
#3- Big Oil and Big Electric (R)
#4- Jack and Joe Schmidt (I-Libertarian)
#5- Blue Dog D (D) and RINO-The Wonk Machine (R)

——————

PCW Extreme Election Night 2010 Update:

Under four weeks to go before PCW’s biggest biannual pay per view show, Extreme Election Night 2010.

Nine matches have been signed. Starting tomorrow night and continuing for the next three weeks, PCW Extreme Political TV will feature preview matches with the contestants who will appear at Extreme Election Night.

The card as of now is:

Ohio: Lee Fisher (D) vs. Rob Portman (R)

Florida: Charlie Crist (I) vs. Marco Rubio (R) vs. Kendrick Meek (D)

Pennsylvania: Pat Toomey (R) vs. Joe Sestak (D)

Kentucky: Rand Paul (R) vs. Jack Conway (D)

Connecticut: Richard Blumenthal (D) vs. Linda McMahon (R)

California: Carly Fiorina (R) vs. Barbara Boxer (D)

Nevada: Harry Reid (D) vs. Sharron Angle (R)

Also:
PCW Tag Team Title Match: The Kings of Old School: Ricky Michaels/Marty Lane (D) vs. ???????
Will it be the International Hit Squad (I)?  Will it be Escondido and Blackwell (I-American Heartland)?  Will it be the two time PCW Tag Team Champions Jack and Joe Schmidt (I-Libertarian)?  The next three weeks will decide just who faces the Kings of Old School at Extreme Election Night.

PCW Title Match: Jill-Berg (R) vs. PCW Champion Yamamoto Tanaka (D)
If Berg wins, she will become the first woman ever to be the PCW Champion.  But the road will be perilous.  The National Organization of Women want to stop her.  The Axis of Evil want her title shot.  So does the extremely unpredictable Triple R (D).  Will Berg survive the next three weeks to make it to Extreme Election Night?  And if so, does the 95 pound Berg have a sniff of a chance against the 350 pound PCW Champion?

Ahmadinejad, Axis of Evil Attack, Nancy Pelosi Thwarted, Katy Perry Video: 9/27 PCW Night of Champions

PCW Night of Champions
PCW Hall
Archbold, OH
Monday September 27th
Host: Johnny Suave

Loud PCW chant as the show begins.  ‘The Voice of PCW’ Johnny Suave welcomes everyone to PCW Night of Champions.

Johnny Suave and his life size cardboard cut-out of Shania Twain

*flute and clarinet flourish*

Two men come out and unroll a white carpet to the ring steps. Dancers then dance. Ballet dancers…ballet? Little children walk up the white carpet and drop rose petals. Someone lets loose some pigeons…not sure just how they’ll get out of the building.  The crowd stands as PCW CEO Barack Obama appears.  Behind Obama walks Joe Biden.

PCW CEO Barack Obama

Obama and Biden climb into the ring accompanied by Hillary Clinton and Rahm-bo aka Rahm Emanuel.

Obama’s out because of the demands made by Axis of Evil leader Mahmoud Ahmadinejad.

*omnious music plays*

Mahmoud Ahmadinejad

Ahmadinejad, accompanied by Khalid-El, Venezuelan dictator Hugo Chavez with Fernando Venezuela, and North Korea’s Kim Jong-Il with Byung Hyung Kang, walk to the ring to a chorus of boos.

Hugo Chavez and Kim Jong-Il

Ahmadinejad and the rest of the AoE climb into the ring.  Ahmadinejad states he’s come to PCW to correct an injustice.  An injustice towards one of his wrestlers that he feels needs to be addressed.  Ahmadinejad complains that his wrestler, Khalid-El, is being passed over for a title shot in favor of a woman.  He holds up a photo of Jill-Berg and turns to Obama.  He calls it an outrage that this…woman…gets a shot at the PCW title instead of Khalid-El.   Ahmadinejad then adds that this is to be expected from a country hose government orchestrated the 9/11 attack to reverse the declining American economy and its grips on the Middle East in order also to save the Zionist regime. The majority of the American people as well as other nations and politicians agree with this view.

At that point, Obama, Biden, HRC, and Emanuel leave the ring in protest as the crowd boos Ahmadinejad.

Ahmadinejad adds that the attack could have been the work of terrorists, supported by the U.S., which “took advantage of the situation” as more boos rain in.  He again demands justice for Khalid-El and a title shot and wants his answer now.  Then Ahmadinejad finally realizes that Obama et al have long since left the ring area and heads off to search for him.

Paige McGillicutty

Backstage, Paige McGillicutty talks with Triple R.  He, too, complains.  He doesn’t want to waste the time to wrestle Jill-Berg when it’s clear that he’ll wipe the ring up with her.

Kimber Marshall

Kimber Marshall introduces the first match of the night.

MATCH #1 FOR THE PCW TELEVISION TITLE

Ken Worth- The American Trucker (I-American Heartland) (c) w/ Tequila Sheila
vs.

Doug ‘King Kong’ Kingman (R)

Summary
Big PCW chant before the bell. Kingman and the American Trucker did some nice back and forth counter wrestling early. Kingman tried to use his power moves while Worth was effective in countering.  Worth armdragged Kingman to the floor. Worth whipped Kingman into the steel guardrail. Worth nailed a missile dropkick off the top. Kingman came back with a lariat. Worth came back with a spinning kick, which connected after Kingman ducked twice and Worth kept spin kicking.  Kingman went for a combination but was thwarted by Tequila Sheila and his steel blender.  Back in the ring, Worth hit a North Star Press for a two count.  Worth nailed a superkick but Kingman escaped a Jake Brake attempt.  Kingman nailed the Combination but Worth kicked up. Kingman went to the top and motioned for the elbow, then missed when Tequila Sheila came over and pushed him off.

Kingman then took control, working on Worth’s arm. Worth came back with a bulldog out of the corner. Kingman came back to choke him against the ropes. Kingman went to the ropes and came off but Worth tried to kick him. Kingman caught the boot and went for an elbow but Worth moved. They traded punches in the center. Worth came back with a flying forearm. Worth went for the Jake Brake but Kingman avoided it and hit the rolling Samoan Drop for a two count. Kingman missed the top rope swanton. Worth nailed the Jake Brake and scored the pin.

WINNER AND STILL PCW TELEVISION CHAMPION: Ken Worth- The American Trucker @ 15:20

Suave notes that the guile and experience of Ken Worth comes out on top of the brute power of Doug Kingman.

Paige McGillicutty has Jill-Berg with her.  Berg dismisses Ahmadinejad’s complaints about her.  McGillicutty asks if she has any concerns about the Axis of Evil interfering in the match.  Berg says no and brings out…

Daisy Cutter-Bomb (R)

…Daisy Cutter-Bomb.  Suave happily notes that DCB returns to PCW after a lengthy absence and mutters something about absence…or was it abstinence… making the heart fonder.  Berg says she’s confident that Daisy Cutter-Bomb will watch her back against Triple R.

MATCH #2 FOR THE PCW TAG TEAM TITLE
The Kings of Old School: Ricky Michaels and Marty Lane (c) w/ ‘Rahm-Bo’ Rahm Emanuel (D)
vs.

The International Hit Squad: ‘Foul Pole’ Andy Golatta and Daniel-San w/ Mrs. Miyagi (I)

Suave states it’s the Democrats versus the true Independents in this battle as Golatta and Daniel-San have not joined a faction to date.

Summary
Ricky Michaels took the mic before the match. Big “PCW” chant. Michaels said that “These people are ready.” He told Golatta and Daniel-San that they were in the wrong place at the wrong time because they were the most hardcore team in PCW.  He said that if there’s one thing that Kings of Old School does better than anyone else, it was giving their people what they want to see- the Democrats in the victory column.  Fans began chanting for Golatta and Daniel-San which pissed the Kings off.  Golatta and Daniel-San attacked them from behind. The Kings came back and tossed them to the floor. They brawled on the floor and the aisle. Fans chanted PCW.  Golatta took a camera from a cameraman and then shot Michaels as he was out on the floor. Golatta and Lane returned to the ring with Golatta drilling him with a back elbow. Lane came back with a swinging neckbreaker.

Daniel-San tagged in and cleaned house.  He teased a Cattle Mutilation after a backdrop but Lane dove out of the ring.  Daniel-San followed him and slammed Lane facefirst into the canvas.  Rahm Emanuel got involved and helped Lane cut off Daniel-San.   They returned to the ring and Lane reversed a whip and sent Daniel-San hard into the buckles, then drilled him into the mat.  Daniel-San was choked against the ropes with help from Emanuel.  Lane came off the ropes and dropped an elbow. Lane cinched in a side chinlock.  This time, Mrs. Miyagi intervened, distracting Lane while Daniel-San came back with a back kick.  Michaels now in the ring.  He grabs Mrs. Miyagi and tosses her out of the ring.   Lane with a forearm to Daniel-San and went back to the side chinlock.

Michaels tagged in with a slingshot senton.  The Kings of Old School worked Daniel-San over in their corner.  Golatta tagged in and cleaned house.  Golatta got a table and set it up as Lane returned to the ring.   Both teams brawled in the ring with cooking sheets and a trash can/lid.  Daniel-San got busted open.  Daniel-San played the face in peril as Michaels and Lane took turns beating on him in the corner.  Golatta finally got the hot tag in.  Golatta gets a two count and tags Daniel-San back in as Lane tags in Michaels. Daniel-San fires off some lightning kicks. Michaels locks in an armbar, but Daniel-San reaches the ropes for the break.  Daniel-San is able to lock in a single leg crab, but Marty Lane threatens to get in the ring and the breaks the hold. Lane charges in anyway and Golatta and Daniel-San set up a double tree of woe and finish off the FBI with a killer baseball slide drop kick!  The Kings attempt to regroup but Mrs. Miyagi goes up top and surprises everyone with an insane Asai Moonsault to Michaels and Lane outside of the ring!  Golatta gets back in the ring but Emanuel pulls him out. Golatta sucks up the strength to get back in the ring as Lane heads in for a two count on Golatta. Lane sets up Golatta in a camel clutch and Michaels dusts him off with a drop kick to the face. Daniel-San enters and kicks the crap out of Lane.  That sends him out the ring. Michaels gets a 2 count on Daniel-San who’s now legal.  The Kings tries to double team Daniel-San but he nails them with a reverse flying elbow.  Golatta enters the ring and he and Daniel-San set up a stereo sleeper submission hold.  Emanuel gets in the ring and Golatta and Daniel-San drop him with a twin drop kick.  Lane and Michaels capitalize and ambush Golatta and Daniel-San.  Golatta is sent out the ring over the ropes and into first row.  Lane and Michaels hit a double fisherman driver on Daniel-San and get the 3 count.

WINNER AND STILL PCW TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS: The Kings of Old School: Ricky Michaels and Marty Lane (D) @ 24:17

Post match, Emanuel drops an F-Bomb on Golatta while Lane and Michaels continue their beatdown of Daniel-San.

Rahm Emanuel (D)

Mrs. Miyagi climbs to the top turnbuckle again and out of nowhere runs down the Leader of the PCW Competition Committee Nancy Pelosi.

Nancy Pelosi (D)

Pelosi tries to pull Mrs. Miyagi off the top rope.  Then…

THUMP

THUMP

THUMP-THUMP-THUMP

THUMP

THUMP

THUMP-THUMP-THUMP

The video screen goes to just outside a dressing room in the back. A police escort is waiting at the door. One of the policemen knocks on the door.

Policeman – Ms. Berg.   It’s time.

Jill Berg

The door opens and four large male bodybuilding types walk out of the dressing room surrounding a petite woman, her male assistant, Jerry, and Daisy Cutter-Bomb.  Berg and Daisy run towards the ring.

THUMP

THUMP

THUMP-THUMP-THUMP

The crowd chants “JILL-BERG…JILL-BERG…”

THUMP

THUMP

THUMP-THUMP-THUMP

“JILL-BERG…JILL-BERG…”

Jill runs up to Pelosi.  RED MIST IN THE EYES!  Jill-Berg with a buzzsaw kick and Pelosi is down.  Emanuel over…Daisy Cutter-Bomb cuts him off.  Kick to the balls…Daisy Cutter Powerbomb!

Road Rage Randy (Triple R)

Here comes Triple R with a steel chair!  He goes after Jill-Berg.  Daisy punches the chair into Triple R’s face.  Jill-Berg with a buzzsaw kick into the chair.   Triple R down.  Daisy drags him up…DAISY CUTTER POWERBOMB ON THE FLOOR!  Suave thinks he’s dead.

Pelosi is trying to get the red mist out of her eyes as Daisy throws Triple R into the ring.

MATCH #3- WINNER GUARANTEED PCW TITLE SHOT AT EXTREME ELECTION 2010
Jill Berg (R)
vs.
Triple R (D)

Daisy in the ring.  She picks up Triple R…SPEAR!  Daisy drags him up…JACKHAMMER SLAM!  She pulls him up…Jill Berg with another buzzsaw kick.  Cover…1…2…3!

WINNER: Jill Berg (R) @ :33

Pelosi finally clears her eyes and sees what just took place.  She cries out ‘NOOOOOOO!’ as Berg points at her.  Pelosi stomps up and down outside the ring.

Suave screeches ‘AXIS OF EVIL’ as Khalid-El delivers a vicious forearm shiver to Jill Berg’s back.  The big 7 footer Fernando Venezuela spins Daisy around and grabs her by the throat.  CHOKE SLAM!   Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, Hugo Chavez, and Kim Jong-Il walk down with big smiles on their faces as Khalid-El, Venezuela, and Byung Hyung Kang stand over the fallen Berg and Daisy.

Backstage, Paige McGillicutty has rock star Katy Perry.  Perry plays the video of her duet with Sesame Street’s Elmo that the children’s show decided not to play due to the low-cut dress she was wearing. 

Suave: “Yeah.  It’s because she’s got a big rack and it showed even though Perry was wearing a flesh colored cover underneath.

Suave: “Wait…I see what the problem is.  Elmo is naked!

Quick recap of the ‘One Man Hollywood A-List’ Stone Chism’s (D) win over Kevin Scott (R) last week.

MATCH #4 FOR THE PCW TITLE
‘The One Man Hollywood A-List’ Stone Chism (D)
vs.

Yamamoto Tanaka (c) w/Reika Kisaurgi (D)

Chism took the mic and said it was great to be back in PCW with all of his fans.  The crowd, of course, booed him in return.  Chism told them you’re going to enjoy the best wrestler in the house and watch the referee count 1-2-3 for him.

Summary
They locked up but Tanaka shoved Chism down to the mat. They locked up again but Tanaka kicked him in the gut and began beating on Chism.   Chism came back and tossed Tanaka to the floor. Chism did the flip off the apron to the floor. Chism tossed a bunch of weapons into the ring. He then took chairs from the front row and tossed them into the ring. Chism beat Tanaka with punches against the rail outside but Tanaka nailed him. Chism signalled for taking Tanaka out into the crowd but was picked up and crotched on the railing. Tanaka whipped him into the rail, then beat him with a chair. They battled back into the ring.   Tanaka wedged a chair in the corner but Chism nailed Tanaka several times with a trash can to the head. Tanaka finally punched the can into Chism and took him out.  Tanaka grabbed a broom and nailed Chism with it. Chism was busted open by this point. Tanaka trashed Chism with weapons to the head. Tanaka began cranking on Chism’s neck and wrenched it as Chism looked to the crowd for support. They rallied him but he was caught with a clothesline. Tanaka drilled Chism in the gut with a chair, then did it a second time.  Tanaka went to do the Earthquake splash but Chism crotched him on a chair.

Chism fired up on offense and nailed a high cross bodyblock for a two count. Chism nailed Tanaka with a chair. He whipped Tanaka into the corner but was caught and sent into the chair that was positioned there. Tanaka chokeslammed Chism for a two count.  Tanaka went to the top rope but was caught by Chism and tied upside down to the tree of woe.   Chism nailed him with a trash can. He went to the corner and hit a running dropkick into the corner.  Tanaka nailed the Choke Slam but only got a two count.  Tanaka went to the outside and poured thumbtacks across the mat.  Tanaka nailed Chism again and pulled him up.   He shoulderblocked Chism through the ropes, then powerbombed him into the tacks.  Chism screamed out in pain.  Tanaka took him back to the ring and climbed up the corner turnbuckle.  Chism tried to fight out but in the end…JAPANESE SUPERDESTROYER!  Tanaka rolled onto Chism and scored the pin.

WINNER AND STILL PCW CHAMPION: Yamamoto Tanaka (D) @ 18:50

Tanaka and Reika celebrated together in the ring as the show went off the air.

9/6-PCW Extreme Political TV Recap

PCW Extreme Political TV on P-SPAN (2 hours)
Wheeler Recreation Center
Bridgeport, CT
Monday September 6th

by Paige McGillicutty

Recap of PCW Extreme Political TV- Hour One

California’s Barbara Boxer (D) and Carly Fiorina (R)…

Carly Fiorina (R) and Barbara Boxer (D)

…faced off in advance of their upcoming match in less than two months at PCW’s Extreme Election Night 2010 and brawled.  Fiorina cut a Promo on Boxer and asked the crowd which lady who they thought was better looking.  Boxer attacked and hit a Flying Back Elbow & Springboard Sunset Flip.  Fiorina hit the California Slam and a Springboard Savat Kick before referees and security hit the ring.

PCW CEO Barack Obama’s aide Rahm Emanuel…

Rahm Emanuel (D)

…comes out and attacks Fiorina. He drops Fiorina with a F-Bomb and then gets on the mic and says he can’t believe Fiorina and Boxer are matched evenly.  Says some other things before…

THUMP

THUMP

THUMP-THUMP-THUMP

THUMP

THUMP

THUMP-THUMP-THUMP

The video screen goes to just outside a dressing room in the back. A police escort is waiting at the door. One of the policemen knocks on the door.

Policeman – Ms. Berg. It’s time.

Jill Berg

The door opens and four large male bodybuilding types walk out of the dressing room surrounding a petite woman and her male assistant, Jerry.  The woman is busy talking on her cell phone while the man furiously scribbles down notes as the group makes their way towards the ring.

THUMP

THUMP

THUMP-THUMP-THUMP

The procession emerges from the back and starts their way down the ramp. The male assistant has a microphone and a portable tape recorder. He flips it on.

“JILL-BERG…JILL-BERG…”

The group then continues towards the ring leaving the police escort behind.

THUMP

THUMP

THUMP-THUMP-THUMP

“JILL-BERG…JILL-BERG…”

The four bodyguards assist Ms. Berg into the ring. She and her assistant immediately go to a corner.

“JILL-BERG…JILL-BERG…”

Berg continues to talk on her cell phone.

“JILL-BERG…JILL-BERG…”

“JILL-BERG…JILL-BERG…”

After a replay from last Monday night’s show where Jill-Berg buzzsaw kicks Nancy Pelosi (D) and then Emanuel comes out and drops an F-Bomb on Berg, Berg and Emanuel have a face to face confrontation.

Jill-Berg red mists Emanuel and then delivers a buzzsaw kick that takes him out.  Berg rolls up Emanuel and a referee runs out and counts to three.

WINNER AND STILL UNDEFEATED: Jill-Berg in :18

Jill-Berg takes the mic and once again demands a PCW Title shot since obviously no one can defeat her.

MATCH #2
RINO- The Wonk Machine (R)
vs.
Paddy O’Kennedy (D)

Good back and forth match.  Both worked both inside and outside.  Crowd was split behind both men.   O’Kennedy hit a Flying Cross Body on RINO.  RINO used his power to push O’Kennedy around.  Paddy landed a Tornado DDT.  RINO later worked on O’Kennedy’s arms & legs. Towards the end, O’Kennedy tried for a Frog Splash but RINO got his knees up.  RINO whips him into the Steel Posts and SPEARS! O’Kennedy for the pin.

WINNER: RINO- The Wonk Machine @ 14:22

MATCH #3

Triple R (D)
vs.
Nick Ray (R)

Ray hit some aerial moves on Triple R.  Triple R used his strength and worked on Ray’s arms during the match.  Triple R skulled Ray with a couple chairshots to score the pinfall.   Lot of “You Suck” chants directed at Triple R who took it all in stride.

Post-match, Triple R flipped off the crowd and walked to the back.

WINNER: Triple R @ 5:09

Former PCW Champion Stone Chism (D) surprises everyone when he walks out to the ring.  Chism cuts a Heel promo and asked the crowd if anyone has ever let people down.  Chism doesn’t accept “failure.”  When Chism lost to Yamamoto Tanaka, he didn’t fail.  The Democrats failed him.  Crowd full of “Tanaka Destroyed You!” chants.  Chism says  he’ll makes Nancy Pelosi apologize and Harry Reid get on his knees and beg for forgiveness for leaving him hanging.

Chism says he has a plan and a huge surprise in store next week.

Recap of PCW Extreme Political TV- Hour Two

MATCH #4- PCW Television Title Match

Ken Worth- The American Trucker w/Tequila Sheila (I-American Heartland Coalition) (c)
vs.

Magnum P.O.’d w/Robyn Masters (R)

Magnum countered the Jake Brake early with a Roll Up.  Worth hit an Enzugiri.  Masters tries to take off the Turnbuckle Pad off and then tries to interfere when the referee goes to fix the Pad.  Worth counters and throws Magnum into Masters.  In the confusion, Worth hits the Jake Brake and scores the pinfall on a Roll Up.

WINNER AND STILL PCW TELEVISION TITLE: Ken Worth- The American Trucker @ 9:46

‘The Voice of PCW’ Johnny Suave recounts the Daniel-San incident from last week.  Suffice to say that Madame President of the PCW Competition Committee Nancy Pelosi…

Nancy Pelosi (D)

…was none too pleased at the return of Daniel-San to PCW last week.  The last anyone had heard from Daniel-San was at PCW’s Loose Cannons Unleashed Pay Per View.

Daniel-San appeared last week and ruined the PG party ‘Sports Entertainment Genius’ Mr. McMann tried to throw.   ‘Foul Pole’ Andy Golatta and Daniel-San will team together as a tag team called the International Hit Squad with Daniel-San’s new manager, Mrs. Miyagi.

MATCH #5

Big Oil & Big Electric w/’Sports Entertainment Genius’ Mr. McMann and Connecticut’s Linda McMahon (R)
vs.

The International Hit Squad
‘The Foul Pole’ Andy Golatta & Daniel-San w/Mrs. Miyagi (I)

Linda McMahon cut a heel promo before the match and said everyone is jealous that they don’t have a shiny Intercontinental Title Belt just like Jack Swagger does in her husband’s federation as the crowd boos.  She says she’s going to take care of her Democratic opponent Richard Blumenthal at PCW’s Extreme Election Night in November just like her husband takes care of business at the WWE.

Good back and forth match.  Big Oil and Big Electric worked seamlessly early on and dominated Daniel-San.  Big Oil threw out Daniel-San to work on Golatta.  Big Oil hit some big shots.  T-Bone Suplex by Big Oil resulted in a cover and a two count to Golatta.  ‘The Foul Pole’  hit a Double Atomic Drop on both Big Oil & Big Electric.  Big Oil did slap on the Sleeper on Daniel-San, but Daniel-San countered with the Neck Breaker.  Golatta  got the upper hand with a Big Boot to Big Electric.  Daniel-San tried to hit the Future Shock DDT on Big Electric, but Big Oil hits the Oklahoma Driller on Daniel-San.

Then Richard Blumenthal (D) and young Democrats Jordan Metzger and Andy Riley run out and distract Big Oil.  Linda McMahon and Blumenthal begin jawing back and forth.  Golatta does the big wind up and nails Big Oil on the balls with the Foul Pole Punch and Rolls Up the big guy to score the pinfall.

WINNER: The International Hit Squad: ‘Foul Pole’ Andy Golatta and Daniel-San @ 17:41

Reika Kisaurgi and PCW Champion Yamamoto Tanaka walk out to answer Stone Chism’s remarks earlier in the night. Sick smile on Tanaka’s face.  Reika says that the only thing Tanaka took from their match back in March was being able to take Chism out in thirty seconds.   Tanaka, through Reika, dares him to come down to the ring like a man and let’s do it now.

Someone does walk down to the ring, but it’s not Stone Chism.  It’s Doug ‘King Kong’ Kingman.

MATCH #6 Non-Title Match

Doug ‘King Kong’ Kingman (R)
vs.

PCW Champion Yamamoto Tanaka w/Reika Kisaurgi (D)

Kingman came out to a HUGE cheer.  Good back and forth match.  They both worked outside the ring at first with Kingman taking the early edge on Tanaka.  Kingman scored with fists in the corner and then bodyslammed the PCW Champion a couple times.  Irishwhip to Tanaka. Tanaka hits a Flying Clothesline.  Reika came in to give a Steel Chair to Tanaka.  Tanaka Chairshots Kingman and then follows by a DDT on the Chair. Kingman inches to the ropes and gets to the floor.

Tanaka whips Kingman into the steps. He then wraps Kingman’s arm around the railing and tries to pull it out of its socket.  Tanaka lifts Kingman for a back suplex and crotches him on the railing.  After Tanaka stomps on the knee, he lifts the railing and drops it on Kingman’s knee. He wraps Kong’s knee around the railing and then rolls him back inside.   Tanaka goes to the top turnbuckle and the crowd roars when Kevin Scott (R)…

‘American Citizen’ Kevin Scott (R)

…races down with a Singapore cane in hand.  Tanaka jumps…Scott nails a Singapore caneshot to the head while the champion was in midair!  Another Singapore caneshot by Scott.  Pump handle slam by Kingman…overhead slam follows!  Scott rolls Tanaka over…Singapore cane Crossface!  Reika in the ring!  Kingman pulls her away from Scott.  Another roar…

Charlie Ranck and Pete Fyle (D)

Ranck and Fyle race down to the ring.  Ranck grabs a chair and blasts Kingman over the head with it.  Ranck and Fyle tie up Kingman’s leg in a chair and Tanaka wraps it up in a Texas Cloverleaf!  Kingman taps out.

WINNER AND STILL PCW CHAMPION: Yamamoto Tanaka @ 19:51

Loose Cannons Unleashed 6 Report- Part One

PCW Loose Cannons Unleashed 6 PPV Report
Hack’s Rusty Nail Saloon
Wauseon, OH
Monday June 21st
Host: Paige McGillicutty

Paige McGillicutty

Paige McGillicutty – Hey, Paige McGillicutty here to give you the rundown on what went down tonight at PCW’s Loose Cannons Unleashed 6.  To say it was a wild night would be a great understatement.  Three title matchs- two title changes tonight.  But we’ll get to that later.  The night started off with a fan favorite entering the ring…

MATCH #1
Bird ‘The Mark’ Ridfych (I)
vs.

‘Chicago Boss’ Mark Ditka (D)

Paige McGillicutty – Bird ‘The Mark’ Ridfych, the perennial boy of summer versus the serious Chicago Boss Mark Ditka.

[Johnny Suave - ...big fight in the corner.  Ridfych with a right hand.

The crowd shouts out 'FastBALL!'

Johnny Suave - And another...

The crowd shouts out 'FastBALL' again.

Johnny Suave - Another

The crowd shouts out 'FastBALL!'

Bird winds up but Ditka tosses him to the floor.  Ditka with a hilo from the ring.  He whips Ridfych into the guardrail.

Johnny Suave - Ditka lighting up Ridfych with chops and punches.  Now he  whips Ridfych into the rail again.

The Chicago Boss drags Ridfych back inside and flies in with a crossbody for two.  Ditka starts pummeling Ridfych again.

Johnny Suave - DITKA'S BEATING DOWN RIDFYCH AND STOMPING A BIG OL' MUDHOLE IN HIM.  Ditka now going for the press powerbomb...Ridfych fights out of it!  Dropkick by the Bird.

Ditka goes to the apron and snaps Ridfych's throat off the top rope, but runs into the leaping heel kick!

Johnny Suave - WAIT A MINUTE!  THAT'S DANIEL-SAN!  THAT'S DANIEL-SAN IN THE CROWD AND HE JUST HEEL KICKED THE FATHER INTO ANOTHER DIMENSION!

Security chases after Daniel-San.  Ridfych makes the cover.  One...two...THREE!

Johnny Suave - HE'S DONE IT!  BIRD 'THE MARK' RIDFYCH GETS THE BIG WIN AT TONIGHT'S LOOSE CANNONS UNLEASHED 6!]

WINNER: Bird ‘The Mark’ Ridfych @ 11:11

Paige McGillicutty – So, it was Bird ‘The Mark’ Ridfych making it through after a tough battle with ‘Chicago Boss’ Mark Ditka.  Next, Triple R (D) cut a promo about his upcoming match.

[The 'Angry Highway Warrior' Triple R looks...angry.  He calls PCW Television Champion Ken Worth- The American Trucker (I) a paper champion who belongs to a paper group (American Heartland Coalition).  Triple R states he belongs to a real group (the Democrats) and promises to send Worth back into obscurity along with the AHC.

McGillicutty - Next, a tag team match up with another fan favorite, The Goatbusters.  The Goatbusters were attacked before their match against the Schmidts Saturday night at CWC's Golden Dreams show.  How would they respond tonight against one of the tag teams who assaulted them?

MATCH #2
The Goatbusters: Ray Scantz and Peter Jenkman (I)
vs.
Diversity in Action: Matt Ficus and Rick Walker (D)

*Spooky music begins followed by a funky beat*

(sung to 'Ghostbusters')
If there’s something grazing
In your neighborhood
Who you gonna call
(Goatbusters)
If you see a herd
And it don’t look good
Who you gonna call
(Goatbusters)

I ain’t afraid of no Goat
I ain’t afraid of no Goat

If you’re seeing horns
Running through your yard
Who can you call
(Goatbusters)
If you have a goat
Sleeping in your bed
Oh, who you gonna call
(Goatbusters)

I ain’t afraid of no Goat
I ain’t afraid of no Goat

Who you gonna call
(Goatbusters)
If you’re all alone
Pick up the phone
And call
(Goatbusters)

I ain’t afraid of no Goat
I hear it likes the girls
I ain’t afraid of no Goat
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah

Who you gonna call
(Goatbusters)
If you’ve had a dose
Of a freaky Goat
Maybe you’d better call
(Goatbusters)

Let me tell you something
Bustin’ makes me feel good

I ain’t afraid of no Goat
I ain’t afraid of no Goat

[The Goatbusters hit the ring and waste no time attacking Diversity in Action]

McGillicutty – Oh yeah!  The Goatbusters were out for blood in this matchup.

[Ficus tries the tornado DDT but Scantz counters to a sick backbreaker and then drops a senton on Ficus's back.

Johnny Suave - SCANTZ WITH THE GREAT COUNTERMOVE AND HE GOES FOR THE COVER!

One...two...Ficus gets a shoulder up.  Ficus gouges Scantz's eyes and makes the tag.   Big Rick Walker comes out and trade punches with Scantz.  Walker ends that with a superkick.  He chokes Scantz on the bottom rope.  He tries to fight back but Walker's stiff forearm knocks him down. More choking and Walker hits the cannonball.  Scantz tries to get up, but Walker won't let it go. Scantz finally gets a flurry of strikes, and pops right back up off a shoulder block and hits a clothesline. And another one. Scantz blocks the corner yakuza kick, but runs right into the Michinoku Driver, which gets 2.

Johnny Suave - SCANTZ NEEDS TO GET TO THE CORNER.

Scantz counters the tornado DDT but gets crotched before he can get to his corner.  Walker back body drops him to the floor.  He glides through the second and third ropes and plants Scantz with a tornado DDT on the floor.

Johnny Suave - HOLY CRAP!  THAT'LL DO IT.  WALKER PULLS HIM BACK IN.

Pumphandle power slam by Walker.  He makes the cover.  One...two...three.]

WINNER: Diversity in Action @ 15:03

Paige McGillicutty – So, Diversity in Action gets a pay per view win here at Loose Cannons Unleashed 6.  Next up, PCW Television Champion Ken Worth- The American Trucker offers his rebuttal to Triple R.

[Ken Worth stands with the rest of the American Heartland Coalition.

Ken Worth - Triple R.  A name synonymous with PCW.  A name synonymous with...choking in big matches.  A name synonymous with...melting down in crucial moments.  A name synonymous for talking tough but when the going gets tough he can't handle adversity.  Triple R,  you're a paper contender and tonight you will fail just like you've failed every other time you've tried to win a title.  Triple R- a name synonymous for failure.]

Paige McGillicutty – Suffice to say, the Television Champion’s remarks didn’t set real well with Triple R.

MATCH #3 – PCW TELEVISION TITLE MATCH

‘The Angry Highway Warrior’ Triple R (D)
vs.

Ken Worth- The American Trucker (I-American Heartland Coalition) (c) w/

Tequila Sheila

[During the ring announcements, Triple R runs in and clobbers Worth.  Triple R picks up Worth and starts talking trash.  He slaps Worth.  The Champion weathers the storm and they trade strikes.  Triple R comes out ahead and hits a corner clothesline.

Johnny Sauve - A WILD START TO THIS MATCH!  TRIPLE R IS GOING TO THROW EVERYTHING BUT THE KITCHEN SINK AT KEN WORTH!  YAKUZA KICK!  TRIPLE R COVERS!

Worth kicks out at two.  Triple R stays on it.

Johnny Suave - TRIPLE R NOT LETTING UP.  HALF AND HALF SUPLEX!   AND ANOTHER COVER.

Worth kicks out at two again.

Johnny Suave - NO!  BUT TRIPLE R MAKING IT CLEAR HE'S DEAD SERIOUS ABOUT WINNING THE TV TITLE.]

Paige McGillicutty – About midway through the match, an uninvited guest appeared.

[Clothesline by Triple R sends Worth flying 360 degrees in the air!  Worth  looks to go for the Jake Brake but Triple R avoids it.  He trips up Worth and then grabs the legs and lifts them in the air.

Johnny Suave - HE'S GO IT!  SHARPSHOOTER BY TRIPLE R!   WILL WORTH TAP OUT?

No.  Daniel-San slides through the ropes and confronts Triple R- who breaks the hold.

Daniel-San (I)

Johnny Suave - IT'S DANIEL-SAN!  AND NOW, TRIPLE R IS DISTRACTED FROM HIS MATCH!

Triple R goes for a Brainbuster on Daniel-San-countered, package piledriver- countered, Triple R runs into a Daniel-San kick.  Triple R again wants a Brainbuster but Daniel-San reverses into the Package Piledriver!

Johnny Suave - HOLY CRAP!  DANIEL-SAN JUST SPIKED TRIPLE R WITH A PACKAGE PILEDRIVER!  WORTH COVERS.

Triple R somehow kicks out at two.]

Paige McGillicutty – Security would escort Daniel-San off the premises for the evening and the match continued.  But that wasn’t the only unscheduled visit in the match.  Later on…

[Former PCW Champion Yamamoto Tanaka (D) grabs Ken Worth and spins him around, GREEN MIST!

Johnny Suave - TANAKA JUST SPEWED GREEN MIST INTO KEN WORTH'S EYES!  HE'S BEEN BLINDED.

Triple R slams Worth's head into the corner turnbuckle.  Tanaka in the ring now. Double chokelift slam!

Johnny Suave - HOLY CRAP!  TANAKA JUST KILLED KEN WORTH AND WE MAY HAVE A NEW TELEVISION CHAMPION!

Triple R locks in the Cobra Clutch.  SNAFU and Dave the Mechanic of the American Heartland Coalition hit the ring and attack Triple R.  Worth escapes and slides out of the ring.  SNAFU drops a few elbows on Triple R's head. Tanaka yanks Dave the Mechanic up and whips him to the ropes and hits a northern lariat. A blinded Ken Worth tries to clear his eyes.  Tanaka brainbusters SNAFU and throws him out of the ring. Tequila Sheila puts water on his eyes to get rid of the mist. Tanaka hits a backdrop suplex on Dave the Mechanic and tosses him out of the ring.  Worth crawls back into the ring and avoids a fireman's carry by Triple R.  Outside the ring, Tanaka smashes SNAFU into the guardrail.  He then slams Dave the Mechanic into the rail.  Tequila Sheila throws the bottle at him.  Tanaka shrugs it off and then drops SNAFU throat-first on the rail.

Johnny Suave - HOLY CRAP!  TANAKA NEARLY DECAPITATED SNAFU OVER THAT GUARDRAIL!

Worth goes for the axehandle but Triple R avoids it.  Triple slams Worth into the turnbuckle.  Triple R hits a neckbreaker on the top rope and a slingshot axehandle, headlock and lefts.  Triple R chokes Worth with a belt and then goes for the cover.  One...two...

Johnny Suave - HERE COMES THE CORPORATION OF DOMINATION!  BIG OIL!  BIG ELECTRIC!  AND KIRK WALSTREIT!

Big Electric (R) pulls the referee out of the ring.  Enraged, Triple R stomps up and down and then starts shouting at the C.O.D.  He becomes even more upset when 'Sports Entertainment Genius' Mr. McMann appears.

Johnny Suave - MR. McMANN IS HERE AND TRIPLE R IS DARING HIM TO GET INTO THE RING.

Tanaka and Big Oil (R) square off.  Walstreit (R) stands next to McMann and feigns jumping into the ring with Triple R.

Johnny Suave - WATCH OUT!

Ken Worth sneaks up from behind and schoolboys Triple R.  The referee counts...one...two...three!

Johnny Suave - HE DID IT!  KEN WORTH DID IT!  HE'S RETAINED THE PCW TELEVISION TITLE!

The C.O.D. point at Triple R and laugh.]

WINNER AND STILL PCW TELEVISION CHAMPION: Ken Worth- The American Trucker @ 23: 19

Paige McGillicutty – Unfortunately, Triple R didn’t see it as a laughing matter.

[Triple R slams a steel-folding chair over the head of Ken Worth.  Worth drops like a shot and Triple R keeps swinging the chair at him.

Johnny Suave - HE'S LOST IT!  TRIPLE R HAS LOST IT!

'No Frill's Chris Escondido and Charlie Blackwell (I-American Heartland Coalition) race into the ring and Triple R bails.]

Charlie Blackwell (I)

‘No Frills’ Chris Escondido

Paige McGillicutty – So once again, Triple R’s penchant for losing focus at the precise moment he needs it the most comes back to haunt him.  Next…a little fun…

[Rahm Emanuel is in the ring to discuss the ongoing BP issue.

Replay: BP Hearings
Tony Hayward – I can assure you that the clerks are doing the best they can to help CEO Obama’s situation.  BP has put, without cost to CEO Obama, 3,524 cans of oil in his car in the last 59 days but unfortunately, it leaked right back out into the concrete.

Joe Barton (R) – Mr. Hayward, I’m ashamed of what the Democrats are trying to do here today.  On behalf of myself and the generous amounts of money that BP and other oil companies contribute to me, I’d like to apologize.

John Boehner (R) – Um, Joe.  Can we go outside and talk for a second?

Joe Barton (R) – Sure.

Boehner and Barton go outside.  The door closes.

Boehner’s voice (R) - ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR @#$@#$@# MIND?  WHAT THE @#$# DO YOU THINK YOU’RE DOING?

Boehner and Barton come back inside.  Barton sits.

Joe Barton (R) – Um…I’d like to retract that last statement.

Rahm Emanuel - What Joe Barton said was not a political gaffe. Those were prepared remarks. That is a philosophy. That is an approach to what they see. They see the aggrieved party here is BP.  And remember, this is not just one person.

'The Alaskan Pitbull' Sarah Palin walks down.

Sarah Palin - Rahm, you lie.  There are some of us who believe that part of the problem is CEO Obama's inability to push BP to find a solution to the oil leak instead of sitting passively by and deferring to BP.

Rahm Emanuel - That's sounds nice, Sarah but-

The Angry Left Wing Bloggers & Friends: Keith Olbermann, Arianna Huffington, Hardball Chris Matthews, and Daily Kos hit the ring and attack Palin.

Johnny Suave - AW, COME ON!  FOUR AGAINST ONE!

Soon enough, the Right Wing Crusaders: Bill O'Reilly, The Queen of Political Extreme Ann Coulter, Sean Hannity, and Rush Limbaugh run in and it's a full fledged brawl.]

Paige McGillicutty – Once they got the mess cleaned up in the ring, it was time for match number four of the night.  Another Republican versus Democrat match up.

MATCH #4

Magnum P.O.’d w/

Robyn Masters (R)
vs.
Paddy O’Kennedy (D)

[...kicks from the ground by O'Kennedy who tries to get away from Magnum, who keeps choking him.  Knee to the side of the face by Magnum.  Then he drives his foot into O'Kennedy's skull.  Chops by O'Kennedy who tries to get back on track.  O'Kennedy lifts Magnum into the air and falls backwards.

Johnny Suave - STUN GUN!

Magnum's throat hits the top rope and he falls back.

Johnny Suave - O'KENNEDY WITH THE ROLL UP.  NO!

Only 2 for O'Kennedy.  Scoop slam followed by a rake to the face by Paddy.  Headscissors by O'Kennedy and then he sits on Magnum's neck for more pressure.  Robyn Masters climbs up on the ring apron and starts shouting at O'Kennedy who keeps pummeling Magnum and whips him into the corner.  O'Kennedy runs into Magnum's boot.

Johnny Sauve - O'Kennedy going up top, Magnum slides out of the way...running headbutt to the gut by Magnum.

Magnum then puts O'Kennedy in a cobra clutch hold.  He lifts him up and fall backwards, driving O'Kennedy to the mat on his head.

Johnny Suave - COBRA SUPLEX! SICK!

Magnum covers.  O'Kennedy kicks out at two.  Flying lariat by O'Kennedy followed by a double leg takedown.  O'Kennedy hits mounted punches and then a chokehold.  Choke biel by O'Kennedy.  Magnum hits a knee to the gut, headbutts by O'Kennedy!  Reverse STO from the knees by Magnum who transitions into a Cobra Clutch!

Johnny Suave - HE'S GOT HIM!  MAGNUM HAS O'KENNEDY TRAPPED IN THE MIDDLE...HE TAPS OUT!]

WINNER: Magnum P.O.’d @ 16:52

Paige McGillicutty – Magnum P.O.’d with the Cobra Clutch takes the win over Paddy O’Kennedy.

————

Part two will be posted tomorrow night.

———————-

Other WP Political Blogger Posts:

• The Oil Is Slick, But These Guys Aren’t June 22, 2010 nonnie9999
• Hey, Jude June 21, 2010 melmaguire
• Lets go to the phones….. June 21, 2010 hippieprof
• Rejection Day 2010. Will It Deny President Obama His Party’s Nomination in 2012? June 22, 2010 Kempite
• The Myth of Drill, Baby, Drill and the Slush Fund June 22, 2010 Rutherford

Other Political Posts:

• Hayworth’s ‘free money grant’ infomercial surfaces June 22, 2010 cnncr
• Coburn declines to criticize Obama admin., Limbaugh June 22, 2010 cnncr
• Haley earned $42,500 for consulting work while in legislature June 22, 2010 cnncr
• South Carolina GOP hopeful Haley supports off-shore drilling June 21, 2010 cnncr
• Obama prods fathers, gives nod to gay dads June 21, 2010 cnncr
• CNN Poll: US views of Britain take hit in wake of spill June 21, 2010 cnncr
• Deepwater Horizon rig owner slams Obama’s 6-month ban on deepwater drilling in Gulf of Mexico, EU June 22, 2010
• Tea party split in Utah Republican Senate primary June 22, 2010
• Brown’s tale of frugality omits $1.8 million home June 22, 2010
• On Hillary and 2012 June 21, 2010
• GOP has enthusiasm, money edge June 21, 2010
• Obama unveils fatherhood initiatives June 21, 2010
• RNC: Golfing, yachting one and the same June 21, 2010
• Barack Obama Offers Cut-’n-Paste Rhetoric For The Base June 21, 2010 Michael Scherer
• Golf June 21, 2010 Joe Klein
• Recall the Recall? June 21, 2010 Jay Newton-Small
• 1,000 Words: The Slick From Space June 21, 2010 Michael Scherer
• A New Tea Party Star in Colorado? June 21, 2010 Michael Crowley
• The Bookies Like Lou Dobbs For U.S. Senate June 21, 2010 Michael Scherer
• Offshore Drilling Ban: Judge Mulls Whether To Overturn Six-Month Moratorium - The Huffington Post | Full News Feed
• WWE RAW Facing A Political Backlash Tonight?
• Ilana Ross: Before Vampires, There Was Politics
• Politics Summary: Tuesday, June 22nd | Left Foot Forward
• Sen. Fritz Hollings: Money: It’s the Problem With Politics
• TALKING POLITICS WITH TIM GRIFFIN | Arkansas News
• POLITICAL HOT TOPICS: Tuesday, June 22, 2010

Elton John Sings (for a price), Helen Thomas Wrings Ari Fleischer’s Neck: 6/7-PCW Extreme Political TV

POLITICAL CHAMPIONSHIP WRESTLING IS PRESENTED BY:

PCW Extreme Political TV (1 Hour)
PCW Hall
Archbold, OH
Monday June 7th
Host: Paige McGillicutty

Paige McGillicutty

Paige McGillicutty – Welcome tonight’s PCW Extreme Political TV report.  I’m Paige McGillicutty and tonight, PCW returned to the PCW Hall for an exciting night of political wrestling action.  Before the matches, PCW Champion Average Joe came out.

Average Joe (I)

[Average Joe has a microphone in the ring.  Ring announcer Kimber Marshall stands behind him.

Average Joe - Ladies and gentlemen, at this time we're going to have a moment of silence and then a ten bell salute to those who lost their lives in the tornado that struck near Millbury, Ohio Saturday night.

Silence.  Then the ten bell salute.

Average Joe - Thanks.

The crowd cheers.]

Paige McGillicutty – After that, we had a special guest perform.

[Elton John leans against his piano and acts as if he's waiting for something.  Finally, Barack Obama's aide de camp Joe Biden walks out and hands Elton a check for one million dollars.

Satisfied, Elton begins to play...

Elton stands, takes his bow, and quickly gets the hell out of Dodge.]

Paige McGillicutty – That leads us to our first match of the night.  The Midnite Rockin’ Express are independents managed by Dr. Bill, the self-help guru who also calls himself PCW’s Manager of Champions.   They took on Tea Partiers Grizzly Adam and Hunter the Hunter tonight.  The Voice of PCW, Johnny Suave, called the action.

MATCH #1
The Midnite Rockin’ Express: Bobby Ricky Michaels and Marty Gibson-Lane w/Dr. Bill (I)
vs.
Grizzly Adam and Hunter the Hunter (I-Tea Party)

[...Hunter the Hunter tries to Overhead Belly to Belly Suplex  Marty Gibson-Lane.  Gibson-Lane blocks and then tags in Bobby Ricky Michaels.  Michaels hits a flying karate chop right to Hunter's neck.  Michaels with another chop.

Johnny Suave - Michaels is chopping down Hunter the Hunter.  Michaels with a side headlock.   DDT!   Michaels covers...Hunter the Hunter kicks out at two.

Hunter tags in Grizzly Adam.

Johnny Suave - Grizzly Adam in.  They lockup.  Hunter the Hunter pulls Michaels off and sends him to the corner of the ring.   Grizzly Adam has a chair.  HOLY CRAP!  HE JUST WALLOPED MICHAELS WITH THE CHAIR.

Grizzly Adam throws down the chair.  Hunter the Hunter puts Michaels in a headlock.

Johnny Suave - Hunter the Hunter has Michaels...reverse DDT!  Grizzly Adam makes the cover.  One...two...NO!  Michaels kicks out at two.]

Paige McGillicutty – The Midnite Rockin’ Express found it tough going early on.  So they decided to switch things up and take it to the floor.

[The crowd stands and cheers.

Crowd - PCW!  PCW!  PCW!

Johnny Suave - UNBELIEVABLE!   JUST WHEN IT LOOKED LIKE HUNTER THE HUNTER WAS GOING TO SLAP ON THE BEAR TRAP ON MICHAELS, GIBSON-LANE COMES IN, AVOIDS THE BEAR TRAP, AND SENDS HUNTER OVER THE TOP ROPE.  THEN MICHAELS TOOK TO THE AIR AND HIT A 450 SPLASH!

Grizzly Adam races around the ring and clotheslines Michaels.

Johnny Suave - MICHAELS JUST GOT DECAPITATED BY GRIZZLY ADAM!  HOLY CRAP!

Gibson-Lane shoulder blocks Grizzly Adam to the floor.  Michaels is up.  He jumps and elbow smashes the lying Hunter.  Gibson-Lane throws Hunter back into the ring.  Michaels puts Hunter on the turnbuckle.

Johnny Suave - MICHAELS HAS HUNTER UP TOP.  WHAT IS HE GOING TO DO?

Michaels takes a side headlock and then jumps off the turnbuckle.

Johnny Suave - Top-rope DDT!  Michaels hooks the legs.  1 ...2 Hunter kicks out!  But that was close.]

Paige McGillicutty – The momentum now firmly in the Midnite Rockin’ Express’s favor.  It was only a matter of time now.

[...Michaels superkicks Grizzly Adam in the head.

Johnny Suave - Grizzly Adam blocked Michaels's first kick.  But Michaels connected good on the second try.   Grizzly Adam makes it back to his corner and tags in Hunter the Hunter. Hunter the Hunter runs in.  Lariat on Bobby Ricky Michaels.  Hunter goes for a second lariat.  Michaels ducks under.  He comes off the ropes and slides between Hunter's legs.

Micheals low blows Hunter the Hunter.

Johnny Suave - Hello!  Michaels with an armdrag take down.  He climbs to the top ...here we go!

Michaels hits Hunter with the 5 Star Frog Splash.

Johnny Suave - HOLY CRAP!  FIVE STAR SPLASH.  MICHAELS MAKES THE COVER!

Referee Ron Martin makes the count. ...1 ...2 ...3 ]

WINNER: Midnite Rockin’ Express @ 14:16

Paige McGillicutty – The Midnite Rockin’ Express are victorious in their first match back over Grizzly Adam and Hunter the Hunter.

———————–

• 

• Bobbinette “Queen B” Carey v Mario Maurako
• The referee for this match is Joel Hortega, and the rules are Ladder Match.

• God of HOW v Black Mamba
• The referee for this match is Matt Boettcher, and the rules are No DQ Match.

• Max Kael v Jatt Starr© v Christopher America© v “Phenomenal” Ryan Faze© v Mark “The Explosive” O’Neal v MPlow© v Aceldama v Shane Reynolds v Crow v Graystone v “The Doberman” Marcus Reinhardt v David Black
• The referee for this match is Matt Boettcher, and the rules are War Games.
• World Title

• Kelly Flawless v Static
• The referee for this match is Joel Hortega, and the rules are Dark Match.

• John Eric Peter Watson v Lazarus
• The referee for this match is Joel Hortega, and the rules are Standard Match.

High Octane Wrestling

———————

Upcoming PCW Events:
Monday June 7th @ Archbold, OH – PCW Hall
Monday June 14th @ Toledo, OH – Huntington Center
Saturday June 19th @ Cleveland, OH – Quicken Loans Arena
Monday June 21st @ Wauseon, OH – Hack’s Rusty Nail Saloon
-PCW Loose Cannons Unleashed 6

Paige McGillicutty – HOW’s War Games is on as we speak.  Check out the action after you’re done watching tonight’s PCW review.  Republicans A-Bomb and H-Bomb have reunited as a tag team and tonight they faced the Democrats new tag team- Diversity in Action.  Diversity in Action features Matt Ficus- who’s definitely gay, and Rick Walker- who’s definitely not gay.  Let’s go to the action.

MATCH #2
A. Tom Bomb and Hy Drogen Bomb (R)
vs.
Diversity in Action: Matt Ficus and Rick Walker (D)

[...Former PCW Champion Yamamoto Tanaka (D) runs out and throws H-Bomb into the steel barricade.

Johnny Suave - IT'S TANAKA!  IT'S TANAKA!

Tanaka lifts H-Bomb and drops him throat first onto the top of the barricade.

Johnny Suave - TANAKA IS GOING TO DESTROY H-BOMB.  HERE COMES A-BOMB!

A-Bomb runs across the ring for a suicide dive.  Walker, on the ring apron, makes the interception and the 340 pound strongman turns it into a super power slam onto the floor.

Johnny Suave - HOLY CRAP!

Ficus and Walker drag A-Bomb back into the ring.  Ficus sets up a table.  Walker drags A-Bomb up to the top rope.

Johnny Suave - NOW WHAT ARE THEY GOING TO DO?

Walker superplexes A-Bomb from the top rope through the table!

Johnny Suave - HOLY CRAP!

Rick Walker covers A-Bomb. Referee Ron Martin makes the count. ...1 ...2 ...3 ]

WINNER: Diversity in Action @ 3:55

Paige McGillicutty – So Diversity in Action not only gets their first PCW win tonight but they also will meet the Midnite Rockin’ Express next week for a shot at the PCW Tag Team belts at PCW Loose Cannons Unleashed 6 in two weeks.  After the match, the action was not over.  The tag teams returned to their locker rooms but Tanaka stayed in the ring.

[Tanaka paces back and forth in the ring.

Johnny Suave - What is he doing?  Reika's not here tonight so he can't really make any remarks.

The crowd begins to cheer.

Johnny Suave - Hold on!  IT'S 'AMERICAN CITIZEN' KEVIN SCOTT!

Scott slides into the ring and it's on.  Tanaka punches Scott but the 'American Citizen' goes low on Tanaka.  Scott whips himself off the ropes and hits Tanaka with a springboard bulldog.

Johnny Suave - Tanaka's head just bounced off the mat!

Scott reaches behind Tanaka's head and executes a sitout.

Johnny Suave - Jawbreaker on Yamamoto Tanaka and that'll loosen a few molars.

American Citizen executes a corkscrew legdrop.]

Paige McGillicutty – Then the calvary came in.

[Democrats Ranck and Fyle race in and attack Scott.

Johnny Suave - Triple team on Scott.  Wait...QUADRUPLE TEAM ON SCOTT!

Rahm Emanuel comes down and slides into the ring.  He takes Scott by the head and F-Bomb's him.

Johnny Suave - F-BOMB!  EMANUEL DROPPED AN F-BOMB ON KEVIN SCOTT.

Tanaka drags Scott up and takes him to the top rope.  He sets him up for the Japanese Super Destroyer.

Johnny Suave - TANAKA'S GOT SCOTT IN A BAD PLACE- HERE COMES ESCONDIDO AND SUFFERABLE!

'No Frills' Chris Escondido and 'Not Just Unbearable...Not Just Intolerable...He is' Justin Sufferable hit the ring and knock Tanaka off the top rope.]

Paige McGillicutty – After that, it was the President of the PCW Competition Committee Nancy Pelosi who finally settled matters once and for all.

Nancy Pelosi

[Nancy Pelosi walks out.

Nancy Pelosi - Wait a minute.  WAAAAAIT A MINUTE!  That's it!  You three want Tanaka?  You've got him.  Next week, a four way match to become the number one contender for the PCW Title.  Yamamoto Tanaka (D) vs. Kevin Scott (R) vs. 'No Frills' Chris Escondido (I) vs. Justin Sufferable (I).  Three has-been former PCW Champions versus the uncrowned champion Yamamoto Tanaka.]

———————

WfWA SUMMER GAMES XI Commercial:
Summer Games XI will be broadcast live from the Cowboys Stadium in Dallas, Texas, on June 13th, 2010!

Summer Games will consist of 8 teams of three wrestlers each. Each match will be survivor series style. All surviving members of the winning teams will move on to a battle royal. The winner of the battle royal will win Summer Games.

Additionally, current WWA World Champion Ronnie Long will be putting his title on the line in the actual event. So, rather than the winner of Summer Games getting a title shot, the winner also gets the title.

The eight teams will be as follows, in alphabetical order.

Team Appalachian Wrestling: Zortalk, John Kellerman, Chris Cannon

Team Coalition of Affiliated Leagues: Christian Light/Heidi Christenson/Joe Drago

Team Conarri: Ronnie Long/Adrien Cochrane/Kazumi Fujita

Team Defiance: Cancer Jiles/Aaron Vasquez/Bronson Box

Team Hydra: Cobra/Stephen Greer/?????

Team Mandrake: Victor Mandrake/Wendy Briese/Terrence Thompson

Team MVWA: Miss USA/Angel Scott/Angel Casey

Team WMW: ???/???/???

Match 1:
Team Hydra vs Team WMW

Match 2:
Team CAL vs Team MVWA

Match 3:
Team Mandrake vs Team AW

Match 4:
Team Conarri vs Team Defiance

Appalachian Wrestling

Defiance Wrestling

Pro Wrestling X

Missouri Valley Wrestling

———————–

Paige McGillicutty – Last month, Charlie Blackwell (I) competed against three other wrestlers for a shot at the Championship Wrestling Council’s Hardcore Title.  Blackwell acquitted himself very well.

Replay: CWC Episode 9

Blackwell lunges his body in order to break up the pinfall attempt by Starr.  Starr and Silkk lay there as Starr starts shaking his head slowly in frustration.  Blackwell slowly gets to his feet still dealing with that big chair shot to his back.  This allows time to for Starr to get to his feet at the same time.  They both then have a test of strength before Blackwell takes the advantage.  Blackwell strikes a left at Starr while Starr returns a right at Blackwell.

Sexy Jack: It’s brawl now!

Silkk comes in and he swings at Starr! Crimson Lightning comes in and swings at Silkk! Blackwell swings at Lightning! Now he continues with a fury of punches. Starr and James Silkk brawl as well. Starr is against the ropes and Silkk misses the over the rope clothesline! Meanwhile Charlie Blackwell catches Crimson Lightning into the Katahajime! He drops down.

Big Stonehenge: Lightning is gonna tap!

Starr comes off the top rope onto both of them with a 450 Splash!

Sexy Jack: The Rising Starr! He covers Lightning!

1..

2…

3!!!

Ding Ding!

Nathan Wisdom: The winner of this match, Starr!!

Big Stonehenge: Starr Zoe has done it! He will face either Noah Hanson or Allister Black at Golden Dreams! Huge win for this CWC new comer tonight!!

Paige McGillicutty – Coming up on June 19th at CWC Golden Dreams show, the PCW Tag Team division will be on display as the Tag Team Champions Jack and Joe Schmidt (I) from Ron Paul’s New Libertarian Army defend their title against the Goatbusters.

Championship Wrestling Council

The CWC is an inter-fed currently consisting of 12 federations

——————-

Paige McGillicutty – Hearst Publishing’s Helen Thomas came out to the surprise of ring announcer Kimber Marshall…

Kimber Marshall

[Thomas toddles into the ring.

Kimber Marshall - Helen, what a surprise.

Helen Thomas - Don't you what a surprise me!  I came out here because I wanted to call out that little s*** Ari Fleischer.

Kimber Marshall - Ari Fleischer?

Helen Thomas - Yeah.  He's the blabbermouth who sent emails to everyone under the sun about my little faux paus the other day.  ARI, GET YOUR ASS OUT HERE AND TAKE THE WHIPPIN' THAT YOU DESERVE!]

Paige McGillicutty – Well, Ari Fleischer did come out and…well…just watch.

[Fleischer and Thomas are face to stomach.

Ari Fleischer - I'm not the one who when asked "Any comments on Israel?" who said, and I quote, that Israeli Jews should "get the hell out of Palestine" and "go home" to Germany, Poland and America.  You did-

Thomas knees him in the groin and then whips her purse around and nails Fleischer in the jaw.]

Paige McGillicutty – And it went downhill from there….

[Thomas is on top of Fleischer and bitch-slapping him.

HUMP

THUMP

THUMP-THUMP-THUMP

THUMP

THUMP

THUMP-THUMP-THUMP

The video screen goes to just outside a dressing room in the back. A police escort is waiting at the door. One of the policemen knocks on the door.

Policeman: “Ms. Berg. It’s time.”

Jill-Berg

The door opens and four large male bodybuilding types walk out of the dressing room surrounding a petite woman, Reika, her bodyguard, and her male assistant, Jerry, in the middle. The woman is busy talking on her cell phone while the man furiously scribbles down notes as the group makes their way towards the ring.

THUMP

THUMP

THUMP-THUMP-THUMP

The procession emerges from the back and starts their way down the ramp. The male assistant has a microphone and a portable tape recorder. He flips it on.

“JILL-BERG…JILL-BERG…”

The group then continues towards the ring leaving the police escort behind.

“JILL-BERG…JILL-BERG…”

The four bodyguards assist Ms. Berg into the ring. She and her assistant immediately go to a corner.

“JILL-BERG…JILL-BERG…”

Berg continues to talk on her cell phone.

“JILL-BERG…JILL-BERG…”

Suddenly the four bodyguards attack Thomas.  One spears her.  The second one jackhammer slams Thomas to the mat.  The other two hold her up for Jill Berg who hits a spinning heel kick and knocks her out.  Berg covers.  A referee slides into the ring and delivers the three count.]

WINNER: Jill Berg @ :54

Paige McGillicutty – Afterwards, Berg declared herself 11-0 and left PCW Hall to a chorus of ‘JILLLLL-BERG’ chants.

—————-

Upcoming PCW Events:
Monday June 7th @ Archbold, OH – PCW Hall
Monday June 14th @ Toledo, OH – Huntington Center
Saturday June 19th @ Cleveland, OH – Quicken Loans Arena
Monday June 21st @ Wauseon, OH – Hack’s Rusty Nail Saloon
-PCW Loose Cannons Unleashed 6

———————

Paige McGillicutty – And then it was time for the main event.  Democrat Triple R (Road Rage Randy) vs. Charlie Blackwell (I-American Heartland Coalition) with the winner getting a shot at the PCW Television Title at Loose Cannons Unleashed 6.

MATCH #4

Triple R aka…Road Rage Randy (D)
vs.

Charlie Blackwell (I)

[Charlie Blackwell with a snap mare takeover on Triple R.  Enraged, Road Rage Randy goes low on Blackwell and then hits a hiptoss.  Blackwell tries to lariat Triple R.  He blocks it and whips Charlie into the ropes.  A second low blow sends Blackwell to the mat and sets off Kenzie Blair.  She feverishly reads through her book, 'Wrestling Manager for Dummies' while Triple R stomps Blackwell's head.  Charlie Blackwell grabs Triple R and applies an arm wrench.  Triple R reverses and rams Charlie face first into the turnbuckle.

Johnny Suave - Charlie Blackwell is getting schooled by the angry road warrior, Triple R.  AGAIN, he rams Blackwell's face into the turnbuckle.

Kenzie Blair is on the ring apron yelling at Triple R.]

Paige McGillicutty – Kenzie Blair wouldn’t be stupid enough to pick a fight with Triple R…would she?

[Backwell applies an arm wrench to Triple R.

Johnny Suave - Blackwell torques the arm of Triple R.  Huh...what's Kenzie Blair doing in the ring?

Blair winds up and whaps Triple R in the face with her book, 'Wrestling Manager for Dummies.'  Triple R back kicks  Blackwell and breaks the arm wrench.  He grabs Kenzie by the throat.

Johnny Suave - Not good!  Not good!  Kenzie Blair really shouldn't be in there.  ROLL-UP BY BLACKWELL!

Referee Ron Martin makes the count. ...1 Triple R kicks out. ]

Paige McGillicutty – Kenzie Blair nearly helped Blackwell pull out the win.  But then Triple R came roaring back.

[Road Rage Randy puts Charlie Blackwell on the turnbuckle.

Johnny Suave - THAT CAN'T BE GOOD...YES!  SUPERPLEX FROM THE TOP ROPE!  COVER...ONE...TWO...KENZIE BLAIR MADE THE SAVE!

Triple R grabs Kenzie and DDT's her to the mat.

Johnny Suave - HOLY CRAP!  TRIPLE R JUST PLANTED BLAIR AND SHE'S NOT MOVING.

Triple R slides from the ring and reaches underneath for something.  He pulls out a lead pipe and jumps back into the ring.

Johnny Suave - TRIPLE R WITH THE LEAD PIPE!  HOLY CRAP!

Triple R whaps Blackwell repeatedly.  Referee Ron Martin tries to pull the pipe away but Triple R pushes him down and continues the assault.]

Paige McGillicutty – Mercifully for Charlie Blackwell, this one ended soon after.

[Triple R suplexes Blackwell from the top rope!

Johnny Suave- YES! He pulls off the superplex! There's the cover.   Ron Martin counts the pin. ...1 ...2 ...3 ]

WINNER: Triple R @ 10:39

Paige McGillicutty – Tough loss for Charlie Blackwell.  Triple R will meet the PCW Television Champion Ken Worth- The American Trucker (I) for the TV belt in two weeks at PCW Loose Cannons 6.  Next week, the Midnite Rockin’ Express take on Diversity in Action for a shot at the PCW Tag Team Title.  I’m Paige McGillicutty.  See you next week.

——————

Other WP Political Blog Posts:

• Hayley Spills June 8, 2010 nonnie9999
• BP,the new Reich and what we should do… June 7, 2010 Alfie
• The Political Power of Networking Sites Part 2 (HELEN THOMAS RESIGNS!) June 7, 2010 steveflesher
• Helen Thomas “Should Go Home” June 7, 2010 Kempite
• “Get the hell out…” of that chair, Helen, Hearst says June 7, 2010 PanAm
• The UN Small Arms Treaty June 7, 2010 Patrick Sperry
• The obligatory Helen Thomas post… June 7, 2010 Alfie

Other Political Blogs:

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• Men charged with threatening Stupak June 7, 2010 cnnjs
• Obama to grads: ‘Don’t make excuses’ June 7, 2010 cnnjs
• Sotomayor gets some friendly pronunciation help June 7, 2010 cnnjs
• TRENDING: Blagojevich takes to Twitter June 7, 2010 fhardingj
• California Dems spar over Facebook privacy settings June 7, 2010 fhardingj
• Poll: Oil spill a major disaster June 7, 2010 cnnjs
• GIBBS: Comments were ‘offensive and reprehensible’ June 8, 2010
• Can NY accept a Gov. who was convicted before taking office? [Watch] June 8, 2010
• Israel expects decision soon on raid probe June 8, 2010
• Bolivia’s president re-elected head of coca union June 8, 2010
• Wis. to launch statewide smoking ban ad blitz June 8, 2010
• U.S. military turns to TV for surveillance technology June 8, 2010
• Australian Parliament House trashes Obama mugs June 8, 2010
• Small offshore quakes shake LA-area coast June 8, 2010
• Bernanke see recovery gaining traction June 8, 2010
• Considering Breast Cancer Exams For Under 50s (VIDEO) June 8, 2010 The Huffington Post News Editors
• Julie Kramer: Facebook Ghosts June 8, 2010 Julie Kramer
• Twin Babies Attacked By Fox (VIDEO) June 8, 2010 The Huffington Post News Editors
• Lauren Selman: Surf’s Up and Get Creative! June 8, 2010 Lauren Selman
• States Warn Of Deep Budget Cuts If More Federal Medicaid Funding Isn’t Delivered June 8, 2010 The Huffington Post News Editors
• Alice Walker: Supporting Boycotts, Divestment and Sanctions Against Israel June 8, 2010 Alice Walker
• Richard Baskin: Remembering Steve Reuther’s Remarkably Full Life June 8, 2010 Richard Baskin
• Miles Grant: Confused Fish & A Dead Pelican: Oil Disaster Hitting Florida June 8, 2010 Miles Grant
• Obama Administration Pushing To Reopen New Offshore Drilling Exploration In Shallow Waters June 8, 2010 The Huffington Post News Editors
• Ritter Vetoes Bill That Would Have Provided State Employees Bonuses June 8, 2010 The Huffington Post News Editors
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• 40 Desserts That Can Kill You June 7, 2010 The Daily Beast
• Will the Anti-Incumbent Revolt Claim Another Senator? June 7, 2010 Benjamin Sarlin
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• Overnight Open Thread June 7, 2010
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McMahon (R) vs. Blumenthal (D) Added to November’s Extreme Election Night: 5/24-PCW Extreme Political TV Report

PCW Extreme Political TV (1 Hour)
Amarillo Civic Center
Amarillo, TX
Monday May 24th
Host: Johnny Suave

Paige McGillicutty

Paige McGillicutty – Welcome to tonight’s PCW Extreme Political TV Report.  I’m Paige McGillicutty and I’ll be reviewing what took place earlier tonight on PCW Extreme Political TV.  Before we start, here’s tonight’s card:

Magnum P.O.’d (R) vs. The Wrestling Gnome- Denouncer of All Wrestling Myths

The Bi-Partisan Dream Team (Rino- The Wonk Machine (R) and Blue Dog D (D)) vs. The Midnite Rockin’ Express  (Bobby Ricky Michaels and Marty Gibson-Lane (I))

Triple R (D) vs. PCW Television Champion Ken Worth- The American Trucker (I) for the title.

Paige McGillicutty – It’s been an eventful week here in PCW.  The Democrats boycotted Friday night’s Kingman show in protest of Arizona’s new immigration law but  inadvertently cost Tanaka the PCW title.  A title cannot be lost through disqualification or count-out; but it can be lost through a no-show.  PCW referees at Kingman confirmed that Tanaka was not in the building and therefore ruled that Average Joe was the new PCW Champion.

Average Joe (I)

Paige McGillicutty – The President of the PCW Competition Committee Nancy Pelosi came out to address what took place.

Nancy Pelosi

[Nancy Pelosi - What happened Friday night is counter to what PCW is all about.  It will not stand.  Tonight, if I have anything to say about it, the Competition will overturn the travesty that took place and restore the PCW Title to its rightful owner- Yamamoto Tanaka.]

Paige McGillicutty – So, after Pelosi came out it was the new PCW Champion Average Joe’s turn.

[Average Joe - I don't think Nancy gets it because she's so drunk in her own power that she couldn't see reality if it smacked her in the face.  I showed up Friday night to wrestle for the PCW Title.  MY opponent, the PCW Champion, didn't bother to show up and deprived the good people of Arizona a match that they expected to see.  PCW rules say a 'no-show' equals title change.  So Nancy, bring out my PCW Title belt!]

Paige McGillicutty – So, with that as the backdrop, we go to our first match…

MATCH #1

Magnum, P.O.’d (R) w/

Robyn Masters
vs.

The Wrestling Gnome- Denouncer of All Wrestling Myths

Kimber Marshall in the ring.

Kimber Marshall – This match is a one fall, fifteen minute time limit.  Weighing in at 235 pounds, a member of the Republicans, accompanied by Robyn Masters, from Honolulu, HI- Magnum P.O’d!

[Magnum P.O'd walks to the ring accompanied by Robyn Masters.]

Kimber Marshall – His opponent, weighing in at 90 pounds, The Wrestling Gnome- Denouncer of All Wrestling Myths!”

Johnny Suave – The Wrestling Gnome is giving up just a few pounds to Magnum P.O.’d.

[The Wrestling Gnome produces a Singapore cane and runs over and starts whacking Magnum P.O.'d on the knee with it.]

[Johnny Suave - HE WHAT?  HE'S GOT A SINGAPORE CANE?]

[Magnum P.O'd grabs the Singapore Cane away and kills The Wrestling Gnome with it.]

[Johnny Suave - Never mind.]

Paige McGillicutty – After that brief burst of offense by The Wrestling Gnome, such as it was, it was all Magnum P.O.’d after that.

[Magnum P.O'd superplexes The Wrestling Gnome from the top rope through a table! ]

[Johnny Suave - HOLY CRAP!  Magnum P.O'd is REALLY trying to kill The Wrestling Gnome!]

[Magnum P.O'd stands him up.  Robyn Masters comes in and clotheslines The Wrestling Gnome. ]

[Johnny Suave - All right, was that really necessary?]

[Magnum P.O'd sucks chants start in the crowd. Magnum P.O'd flips off the crowd and laughes.  He uses an inside cradle to pin The Wrestling Gnome. The ref starts the count. ...1 ...2 ...3 ]

WINNER: Magnum P.O.’d @ 1:55

Paige McGillicutty – Magnum P.O.’d with the easy win.

—————————-

Missouri Valley Wrestling Presents Night of Champions
Kemper Arena
Kansas City, MO
Sunday May 23rd, 2010
Hosts: Rick Fantastic and Chastity Gold

MAIN EVENT:
Jackie Daniels vs. Miss USA (c) for the MVW Title

SUMMER GAMES XI
Summer Games XI will be broadcast live from the Cowboys Stadium in Dallas, Texas, on June 13th, 2010!

Summer Games will consist of 8 teams of three wrestlers each. Each match will be survivor series style. All surviving members of the winning teams will move on to a battle royal. The winner of the battle royal will win Summer Games.

Additionally, current WWA World Champion Ronnie Long will be putting his title on the line in the actual event. So, rather than the winner of Summer Games getting a title shot, the winner also gets the title.

The eight teams will be as follows, in alphabetical order.

Team Appalachian Wrestling: Zortalk, John Kellerman, Chris Cannon

Team Coalition of Affiliated Leagues: Christian Light/Heidi Christenson/Joe Drago

Team Conarri: Ronnie Long/Adrien Cochrane/Kazumi Fujita

Team Defiance: Cancer Jiles/Aaron Vasquez/Bronson Box

Team Hydra: Cobra/Stephen Greer/?????

Team Mandrake: Victor Mandrake/Wendy Briese/Terrence Thompson

Team MVWA: Miss USA/Angel Scott/Angel Casey

Team WMW: ???/???/???

Match 1:
Team Hydra vs Team WMW

Match 2:
Team CAL vs Team MVWA

Match 3:
Team Mandrake vs Team AW

Match 4:
Team Conarri vs Team Defiance

Appalachian Wrestling

Defiance Wrestling

Pro Wrestling X

Missouri Valley Wrestling

———————–

Paige McGillicutty – Business picked up when Yamamoto Tanaka, accompanied by Reika Kisaurgi, arrived at the arena.

[Yamamoto Tanaka, PCW Title belt slung over his shoulder, walks into the back of the Amarillo Civic Center along with Reika.]

[Johnny Suave - Well, this could get interesting real fast.  The PCW Competition Committee is meeting as we speak.  It will take a two third's vote to overturn the referee's decision Friday night and I don't think Pelosi can get the votes.]

Paige McGillicutty – Tanaka, through Reika, had this to say.

[Reika Kisaurgi - Yamamoto Tanaka will hand over the belt to Average Joe when Average Joe has the balls to go up and take it from him.]

Paige McGillicutty – The second match of the night saw a tag team return to PCW.

MATCH #2
Blue Dog D (D) and RINO- The Wonk Machine (R)
vs.
Midnite Rockin’ Xpress (Bobby Ricky Michaels and Marty Gibson-Lane ) (I)

[Bobby Ricky Michaels flies from the turnbuckle and hits an elbowdrop on Blue Dog D.]

[Johnny Suave - Michaels flies and hits the elbow.  Blue Dog D rolls to his corner...he tags in RINO.   The Wonk Machine walks right a diving elbow smash from Michaels.]

[RINO lifts Michaels and slams him to the mat.  RINO pulls him up again and sets him for a belly-to-belly.  Michaels knees RINO in the groin.  RINO throws Michaels to ringside.   Blue Dog D with a chairshot to Michaels.  Tiger suplex attempt by RINO blocked.  Marty Gibson-Lane swoops in and superkicks RINO.]

Paige McGillicutty – This match would go all over the Amarillo Civic Center before finally returning to the ring.

[Bobby Ricky Michaels hooks RINO in a double underhook and drives him through a table! ]

[Johnny Suave - TIGER DRIVER!  TIGER DRIVER!  RINO'S IN BIG TROUBLE NOW!]

[Springboard bulldog by Michaels sends RINO's head crashing into the mat. Gibson-Lane  in the ring.  He sets RINO up with a side headlock and DDTs him into the mat. ]

[Johnny Suave - DDT!  DDT!  Now Michaels tags in Gibson-Lane.]

Gibson-Lane drops a chair on the mat and delivers a spine buster to RINO right into the chair!!!  Michaels holds the chair in front of RINO…Gibson-Lane spins around and kicks the chair into RINO’s face!!]

[Johnny Suave - HOLY CRAP!  AND HERE COMES BLUE DOG D!]

Gibson-Lane grabs onto Blue Dog D and Belly to Belly Suplexes him onto the chair!! Gibson-Lane covers RINO! Denny Wallace counts. …1 …2 …3 ]

WINNER: THE MIDNITE ROCKIN EXPRESS (Bobby Ricky Michaels and Marty Gibson-Lane) @ 9:41

[Watching closely is PCW CEO Barack Obama's aide Rahm Emanuel.  He takes some notes and then leaves.]

Paige McGillicutty – So, a nice win for the returning Midnite Rockin’ Express.  It appears they’ve caught the attention of the Democrats as Rahm Emanuel watched the match at ringside.  We’ll have to wait and see where this heads to.  And speaking of people talking to groups…

['American Citizen' Kevin Scott leaves the Republican locker room after a meeting with Eric Cantor, John Boehner, and Mitch McConnell.]

Paige McGillicutty – Interesting.  Very interesting.  Next, the PCW Competition Committee rendered their verdict and it wasn’t good for Nancy Pelosi.  She could not muster the two-third’s vote to overturn so the matter then went to Harry Reid and his PCW Executive Committee to discuss.   Johnny Suave then made this announcement…

[Johnny Suave - I've just been handed a note.  A fifth match has been signed for November's PCW Extreme Election Night 2010- Linda McMahon (R) will face Richard Blumenthal (D) at Extreme Election Night!]

Paige McGillicutty – So, it’ll be the former WWE CEO Linda McMahon taking on Richard Blumenthal in November at PCW Extreme Election Night 2010.  That makes five matches that have been signed already.  They include:

Ohio: Lee Fisher (D) vs. Rob Portman (R)

Florida: Charlie Crist (I) vs. Marco Rubio (R) vs. Kendrick Meek (D)

Pennsylvania: Pat Toomey (R) vs. Joe Sestak (D)

Kentucky: Rand Paul (R) vs. Jack Conway (D)

Connecticut: Richard Blumenthal (D) vs. Rand Paul (R)

Paige McGillicutty – Also, on June 21st, PCW Presents Loose Cannons Unleashed 6.  This will be the sixth installment of the first ever PCW Pay Per View show.  Are we headed for a Tanaka-Average Joe showdown at Loose Cannons Unleashed for the PCW Title?  Stay tuned.

———————-

Upcoming PCW Events:
Wednesday May 26th @ Fort Stockton, TX – Coliseum and Civic Center
Wednesday June 2nd @ Columbus, IN – Hamilton Center Ice Arena
Friday June 4th @ Portsmouth, OH – Portsmouth Civic Center
Saturday June 5th @ Newark, OH – Lou and Gib Reese Ice Arena
Monday June 7th @ Archbold, OH – PCW Hall
Monday June 14th @ Toledo, OH – Huntington Center
Saturday June 19th @ Cleveland, OH – Quicken Loans Arena
Monday June 21st @ Wauseon, OH – Hack’s Rusty Nail Saloon

Championship Wrestling Council

The CWC is an inter-fed currently consisting of 14 federations

——————–

Paige McGillicutty – The PCW Executive Committee returned with their verdict on the Tanaka-Average Joe situation…

[Johnny Suave - Wait.  I just got word from the back that Harry Reid and Nancy Pelosi are coming out to discuss the PCW Title situation.]

Harry Reid (D)

[Pelosi and Reid denounce the Republicans for voting against overturning the referee's ruling awarding the PCW Title to Average Joe.   Pelosi blames Republicans for not delivering enough votes to do 'the right thing' and restore Yamamoto Tanaka as the PCW Champion.

Reid threatens to hold votes over the weekend if need be to 'fix the problem.'  Pelosi praises Reid and then...

THUMP

THUMP

THUMP-THUMP-THUMP

THUMP

THUMP

THUMP-THUMP-THUMP

[The video screen goes to just outside a dressing room in the back. A police escort is waiting at the door. One of the policemen knocks on the door.]

Policeman: “Ms. Berg. It’s time.”

Jill-Berg

[The door opens and four large male bodybuilding types walk out of the dressing room surrounding Jill-Berg and Berg's male assistant in the middle.  Jill-Berg is busy talking on her cell phone while Jerry, the male assistant, furiously scribbles down notes as the group makes their way towards the ring.]

THUMP

THUMP

[Johnny Suave - WHOA-OH!  THINGS ARE ABOUT TO GET REAL INTERESTING NOW!]

THUMP-THUMP-THUMP

[The procession emerges from the back and starts their way down the ramp.

Her assistant has a microphone and a portable tape recorder. He flips it on.]

“JILLLLL-BERG…JILLLLL-BERG…”

[The group then continues towards the ring leaving the police escort behind.]

“JILLLLL-BERG…JILLLLL-BERG…”

[The bodyguards assist Ms. Berg into the ring.  She, Jerry, and four bodyguards immediately attack Pelosi and Reid.]

“JILLLLL-BERG…JILLLLL-BERG…”

[Jill hits a spinning heel kick on Pelosi and then a crescent kick on Reid.]

[Johnny Suave- HOLY CRAP!  JILL-BERG IS BACK AND SHE'S PISSED!]

“JILLLLL-BERG…JILLLLL-BERG…”

[Jill Berg throws Pelosi on top of Reid and covers.  A referee races out and makes the count.  ...1...2...3]

WINNER: Jill Berg @ :21

[Jill Berg then takes the microphone and promises to become the first woman to ever win the PCW Title.  She states that she's now 10-0 in PCW and pledges to win the PCW Title for all the women out there to show them that if you work hard enough anyone can achieve their dreams...and for the children.]

Paige McGillicutty – So Jill-Berg again making a promise to become the first woman to win the PCW title.  But somehow Nancy Pelosi and the Feminist Left may have something to say about that.

MATCH #3 – PCW Television Title Match

Triple R (Road Rage Randy) (D)
vs.

Ken Worth- The American Trucker (I)(c) w/

Tequila Sheila

[Kimber Marshall - This match is one fall for the PCW Television Title.  On his way to the ring at this time, weighing in at 235 pounds, from Scarsdale, NY, a member of Democrats, Road Rage Randy!!!

The crowd boos Road Rage Randy as he comes to the ring.

Kimber Marshall - and his opponent, weighing in at 225 pounds, from Gary, Indiana, a member of American Heartland Coalition, accompanied by Tequila Sheila. he holds the PCW Television Champion, Ken Worth- The American Trucker!!!]

Paige McGillicutty – Worth started fast but Triple R began to assert himself.

[American Trucker gets up off the ground and Triple R hits him with a flying dropkick.]

Paige McGillicutty – Triple R would take control of the match later on.

Triple R sends Worth to ringside. Triple R jumps off of the turnbuckle nailing him with an Asia Moonsault.  Tomahawk chop from Road Rage Randy.  Running powerslam puts The American Trucker thru a table! The crowd chants: ‘PCW…PCW!]

Charlie Blackwell

[The crowd cheers when Charlie Blackwell runs down.  Ropeflip hiptoss to Road Rage Randy.  Blackwell puts Road Rage Randy thru a table with a beautiful Senton Bomb!

Johnny Suave - HOLY CRAP!

Worth pulls Triple R out of the wreckage and rolls him up.  1...2...3.

WINNER AND STILL PCW TELEVISION CHAMPION: Ken Worth- The American Trucker

[Tanaka comes in and wallops Blackwell from behind.

Yamamoto Tanaka (D)

Johnny Suave - TANAKA!  TANAKA!  HE'S LAYING INTO CHARLIE BLACKWELL!

Tanaka pummels Blackwell.  Several referees and road agents race down and break up the fracas.]

————————-

Upcoming PCW Events:
Wednesday May 26th @ Fort Stockton, TX – Coliseum and Civic Center
Wednesday June 2nd @ Columbus, IN – Hamilton Center Ice Arena
Friday June 4th @ Portsmouth, OH – Portsmouth Civic Center
Saturday June 5th @ Newark, OH – Lou and Gib Reese Ice Arena
Monday June 7th @ Archbold, OH – PCW Hall
Monday June 14th @ Toledo, OH – Huntington Center
Saturday June 19th @ Cleveland, OH – Quicken Loans Arena
Monday June 21st @ Wauseon, OH – Hack’s Rusty Nail Saloon

—————–

Paige McGillicutty – So now, it fell on the PCW CEO Barack Obama to come out and address the PCW Title issue…

[*flute and clarinet flourish*

Two men come out and unroll a white carpet to the ring steps. Dancers then dance. Ballet dancers…ballet? Little children walk up the white carpet and drop rose petals. Someone lets loose some pigeons…we’re still not sure just how they’ll get out of the building. The crowd stands as PCW CEO Barack Obama appears. Behind Obama, two aides wheel out a banged up portable closet with his Aide de Camp Joe Biden inside.

Obama climbs in the ring.

Barack Obama - Ladies and gentlemen, no doubt you have heard tonight the deliberation of the PCW Executive and Competition Committee about what took place Friday night in Kingman, Arizona.  Let me go on record by stating that I totally agree with those who chose to boycott the Arizona show in protest of an immigration law that is misguided and mandates profiling.  However, rules are rules.

Obama holds up the PCW Title belt.

Barack Obama - So Average Joe, come down and get your damn belt.]

Paige McGillicutty – And that would be it, right?  I mean, nothing else could take place…

[Just Average Joe takes the belt from PCW CEO Obama, Yamamoto Tanaka and Reika Kisaurgi hit the ring and attack him.

Johnny Suave - IT'S A SET UP!  DAMMIT!  THIS WHOLE THING WAS A SET UP!

Nancy Pelosi climbs in the ring with a referee and calls for the bell.

Johnny Suave - THEY'RE GOING TO TAKE THE BELT RIGHT BACK TO-...HOLD ON!  CHARLIE BLACKWELL!

Charlie Blackwell slides into the ring with a steel folding chair and whaps Reika over the head.  Tanaka turns around just in time for Blackwell to missile dropkick him in the balls.

Johnny Suave - HOLY CRAP!

Tanaka down.  Triple R then runs in and attacks Blackwell.

'No Frills' Chris Escondido

'Not Just Unbearable...Not Just Intolerable...He is- Justin Sufferable

'No Frills' Chris Escondido and Justin Sufferable leads the American Heartland Coalition down and they go after Triple R.  Rahm Emanuel and the Democrats charge down.]

Paige McGillicutty – And that’s the show.  Next week, a reply of last year’s PCW Loose Cannons Unleashed 5.  We’ll be back in two weeks.

——————–

Other WP Political Blogger Posts:

• The Goose and the Gander… May 25, 2010 Alfie
• Potpourri Pan America:Headlines in brief – a political bribe(?), a rebellion(?), gasoline taxes(?), immigration, and more May 25, 2010 PanAm
• Job-Gate; Sestak-Obama Scandal Needs An Independent Prosecutor May 25, 2010 Kempite
• “Shut Up!” On Steroids May 25, 2010 Blackiswhite, Imperial Consigliere
• “Shut Up!” On Steroids May 25, 2010 Blackiswhite, Imperial Consigliere
• Wash Colors Separately May 25, 2010 nonnie9999

Other Political Posts:

• Donors help Haley after affair allegation May 25, 2010 cnncr
• Jindal postpones book to focus on oil spill May 25, 2010 cnnam
• Pawlenty schedules another New Hampshire stop May 25, 2010 cnnam
• Obama to deploy up to 1,200 more troops to border May 25, 2010 cnncr
• Obama blasted for political posturing after meeting with Senate GOP May 25, 2010 cnncr
• Wall Street reform: Who won, who lost (so far) May 25, 2010 cnnjs
• CNN/Opinion Research Poll – May 21-23 – Obama, Midterm Election May 25, 2010 cnnpoll
• Tax reform plan could reduce tax bite for many May 25, 2010 cnncr
• Obama to visit Gulf Coast May 25, 2010 cnncr
• CNN Poll: Anti-incumbent sentiment remains strong May 25, 2010 cnncr
• Teacher stands by lesson but would keep ‘Klan’ off campus next time May 25, 2010
• Analyst upgrades NetApp on growth prospects May 25, 2010
• Brrr! Outdoors Super Bowl coming to NJ in 2014 May 25, 2010
• New York-New Jersey will host the 2014 Super Bowl May 25, 2010
• Forbes buying online news startup True/Slant May 25, 2010
• Autopsy fails to pinpoint cause of bassist’s death May 25, 2010
• Europe faces an era of government spending cuts May 25, 2010
• Leyritz wrongful death lawsuit in Fla. settled May 25, 2010
• Singer Kelis and rapper Nas finalize divorce in LA May 25, 2010
• Insurer refuses to pay latest Stanford legal fees May 25, 2010
• Gadhafi’s son: Freed Lockerbie bomber is very sick May 25, 2010
• Transocean seeks delay of oil spill depositions May 25, 2010
• Tom Vanderbilt: Made in Midtown: Meet Ron Frasch May 25, 2010 Tom Vanderbilt
• George Weah: The 1Goal Campaign Calls on Governments in Africa to Pledge to Send Every Child to School May 25, 2010 George Weah
• Rabbi Steve Gutow: Why is this Rabbi in Viet Nam? May 25, 2010 Rabbi Steve Gutow
• Mark J. Jackson Sentenced To 15 Years In Prison For Ponzi Scheme May 25, 2010 The Huffington Post News Editors
• Illinois DENIES 27,000 Students Financial Aid May 25, 2010 The Huffington Post News Editors
• Courtney Boyd Myers: The New Kids on the Internet May 25, 2010 Courtney Boyd Myers
• Ellen Sterling: Making History In Las Vegas, Part I: Clinton’s At the Celebration May 25, 2010 Ellen Sterling
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• Jeff Biggers: Rand Paul’s Big Coal Blunder: Re Kentucky Plunder, “I don’t think anyone’s going to be missing a hill or two.” (VIDEO) May 25, 2010 Jeff Biggers
• Mark Shriver: Another Gulf Coast Disaster…Are We Ready? May 25, 2010 Mark Shriver
• Wenonah Hauter: Why Obama Must Shut Down BP Atlantis May 25, 2010 Wenonah Hauter
• Bonnie Fuller: Revealed! Why The Biggest Beauties Like Sandra, Elin and Halle Get Cheated On! May 25, 2010 Bonnie Fuller
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• BP’s Shocking Memo May 25, 2010 Rick Outzen
• South Carolina’s Orgy of Scandals May 25, 2010 Lloyd Grove
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• Fergie’s Latest Flameout May 25, 2010 Tina Brown
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Hannity, Beck, Coulter, O’Reilly Brawl with Markos, Arianna, Olbermann, and Matthews: PCW Extreme Political TV Report

PCW Extreme Political TV (1 Hour)
Cheyenne Arena
Cheyenne, WY
Monday May 10th
Host: Johnny Suave

Suave welcomes everyone to another edition of PCW Extreme Political TV and expresses relief that both Rush Limbaugh and Keith Olbermann won’t be there tonight.  He sends it right to the ring where the lovely Kimber Marshall is.

Kimber introduces the first contestant.  Former Oakland Raiders quarterback JaMarcus Russell!

JaMarcus Russell

Kimber then gets ready to introduce his opponent…

THUMP

THUMP

THUMP-THUMP-THUMP

THUMP

THUMP

THUMP-THUMP-THUMP

The video screen goes to just outside a dressing room in the back. A police escort is waiting at the door. One of the policemen knocks on the door.

Policeman: “Ms. Berg. It’s time.”

Jill-Berg

The door opens and four large male bodybuilding types walk out of the dressing room surrounding a petite woman, Reika, her bodyguard, and her male assistant, Jerry, in the middle. The woman is busy talking on her cell phone while the man furiously scribbles down notes as the group makes their way towards the ring.

THUMP

THUMP

THUMP-THUMP-THUMP

The procession emerges from the back and starts their way down the ramp. The male assistant has a microphone and a portable tape recorder. He flips it on.

“JILL-BERG…JILL-BERG…”

The group then continues towards the ring leaving the police escort behind.

“JILL-BERG…JILL-BERG…”

The four bodyguards assist Ms. Berg into the ring. She and her assistant immediately go to a corner.

“JILL-BERG…JILL-BERG…”

Berg continues to talk on her cell phone.

“JILL-BERG…JILL-BERG…”

Russell stands in his corner and munches on twinkies and Ding Dongs.  Berg’s bodyguards suddenly charge and attack the former quarterback.  After a minute of pummelling Russell to the mat, two bodyguards lifts him up and a third spears him.  Russell is pulled up again and the largest bodyguard jackhammer slams  him.  Again, Russell is pulled up…Berg hangs up and puts her cell phone in her purse.  She walks over to Russell and hits a spinning heel kick.  Then the buzzsaw kick.  Russell down and out.  Berg covers…1…2…3.

WINNER: Jill Berg in 1:33

Suave announces that Berg’s record in PCW is now 9-0.  The crowd chants ‘JILLLLL-BERG’ as she leaves.

——————

Backstage, the Democrats caucus.  Nancy Pelosi complains about Jill-Berg and wants to bar her from further competition.  She cites the fact that PCW sold the women’s division to Missouri Valley Wrestling months ago.

Harry Reid disagrees.  He doesn’t want to be discriminatory.

Steny Hoyer pipes up that perhaps the Democrats should champion their own female wrestler.  Pelosi likes the idea and books Democrats Emily List and Code Pink for next week.

——————

Back to the ring…

Kimber Marshall introduces Republican Magnum P.O.’d

Magnum P.O.’d  with

Robyn Masters

And then his opponent, Triple R (D)

Road Rage Randy (Triple R)

Suave notes that last week, this was a three way dance including SNAFU (I) from the American Heartland Coalition.

Triple R runs out with a steel folding chair and lays in the chairshots on Magnum P.O.’d and then SNAFU.  Robyn Masters gets into the ring and grabs the chair.  She gets pushed down by Triple R who raises the chair to take her out.

A. Tom Bomb (R), John McCain (R-AZ), and J.D. Hayworth (R-AZ) race down to make the save.  A-Bomb tackles Triple R and rains down blows.  McCain and Hayworth begin to help but then end up brawling outside the ring.  PCW Champion Yamamoto Tanaka then runs down with Reika, Arlen Specter (D-PA), and Joe Sestak (D-PA).  Tanaka and A-Bomb hook up.  Specter and Sestak start to join in but then they end up brawling inside the ring….

SNAFU

SNAFU is in the back with the American Heartland Coalition.  He calls his exclusion from the match typical partisanship to protect their turf and keep him, an independent, out of the mix.  SNAFU promises to their ‘little party.’

[...Magnum P.O'd hooks Road Rage Randy in a double underhook and tiger drives him through a table!  The crowd chants 'PCW...PCW!"  Robyn Masters stomps away on Triple R in the corner of the ring.  Magnum P.O'd steps in with a short-arm clothesline.  He covers...1...2...no...Triple R kicks out.   Triple R goes low on Magnum.  He grabs Masters by the hair and throws her over the top rope.  Triple claims to the second turnbuckle and waits for Magnum, P.O.'d to stand back up.  He leaps and shoulder blocks Magnum P.O'd back to the mat.  Triple R covers Magnum P.O'd hooking the leg. The ref starts the count. ...1 Magnum P.O'd kicks out.

Magnum P.O'd comes back with a back fist.  Triple R hits Magnum P.O'd with the back of his elbow.  Triple R climbs to the top rope, jumps on Magnum P.O'd and tornado DDT's him onto the mat.  More 'PCW' chants start in the crowd.  Diving elbow smash from Road Rage Randy.  Triple R then kicks Magnum P.O'd in the groin and then hits a flying karate chop right to his neck. A lucha-libre style hiptoss by Road Rage Randy flings Magnum P.O'd to the mat. Triple R uses a legsweep faceslam to bring Magnum P.O'd down. He covers. Davey Keels counts the pin. ...1 ...2

Sean Hannity

'The Queen of Political Extreme' Ann Coulter

Glenn Beck

Bill O'Reilly

Right Wing Brigadiers Hannity, Coulter, Beck, and O'Reilly attack Triple R.  This, of course, brings in...

Markos Moulitsas

Arianna Huffington

Keith Olbermann

'Hardball' Chris Matthews

The Angry Left-Winger Bloggers pile in and it's on.  Meanwhile, SNAFU (I) walks down with a steel folding chair and sneaks into the ring.  He waffles Magnum P.O.'d with the chair and then Triple R.  SNAFU covers before anyone realizes what's going on.  Referee Davey Keels makes the count...1...2...3.

WINNER: SNAFU @ 12:06

SNAFU quickly gets out of the ring and runs to the back.

-------------------

Upcoming PCW Events:
Wednesday May 12th @ Rock Springs, WY – Rock Springs Skating Rink
Friday May 14th @ Ogden, UT – Neber County Arena
Saturday May 15th @ Reno, NV – Reno-Sparks Livestock Events Center
Monday May 17th @ Las Vegas, NV – Orleans Arena
Friday May 21st @ Kingman, AZ - Mohave County Fairgrounds
Saturday May 22nd @ Albuquerque, NM - Tingley Coliseum
Monday May 24th @ Amarillo, TX - Amarillo Civic Center
Wednesday May 26th @ Fort Stockton, TX - Coliseum and Civic Center
Wednesday June 2nd @ Columbus, IN - Hamilton Center Ice Arena
Friday June 4th @ Portsmouth, OH - Portsmouth Civic Center
Saturday June 5th @ Newark, OH - Lou and Gib Reese Ice Arena

----------------------------

Championship Wrestling Council

The CWC is an inter-fed currently consisting of 15 federations

Coming soon:

CWC Wrestling Episode 9

Match 1
#1 Contender for Hardcore Title - Fatal 4 Way
James Silkk(PWX) vs. Starr vs. Crimson Lightning(VWF) vs.

Charlie Blackwell (PCW)

Match 2
#1 Contender for CWC World Tag Team Titles - Tag Team
Jack Eastwood and Devon Chaney(OWC) vs. Intrepid and RJ Stone(WWA)

Match 3
#1 Contender for CWC North American Championship - Single
Darin Zion(PWX) vs. Joey Fail(RKWDC)

Match 4
#1 Contender for CWC World Heavyweight Title - Triple Threat
Chris Stern vs. Tyler Graves vs. Devon "DG" Poole(PWX)

Main Event
Triple Threat Elimination
Jinx vs. Rick Rampage vs. Katherine Stryfe

——————-

Yamamoto Tanaka w/

Reika Kisuargi

Reika has good news and bad news.  The good news is that PCW Champion Yamamoto Tanaka made it through his toughest match to date when he defeated A. Tom Bomb a few weeks back.  The bad news is there's no one else left who remotely challenges Tanaka.

Reika goes on to proclaim Tanaka the greatest PCW Champion ever.  This brings out a few interested bystanders.

'Not Just Unbearable...Not Just Intolerable...He is' Justin Sufferable

'No Frills' Chris Escondido

'American Citizen' Kevin Scott

Sufferable tells Reika that he hates to be a wet blanket but Tanaka has a ways to go before he'll be considered the best PCW Champion of all time.

Suave notes the occasion- four current or former PCW Champions inside the ring at the same time.

Sufferable adds that he, Escondido, or Scott could lay claim to being the best PCW Champion ever.  Reika calls all three has-beens and not worthy to being inside the same ring as Tanaka.  She tells them to leave or Tanaka will throw them out.

"Wait a minute...waaaaaait a minute!"

Nancy Pelosi

Pelosi tells Sufferable, Escondido, and Scott that she'd love to see an all champions match with Tanaka but the Democrats have too much invested him to risk a match like that.  Pelosi informs Escondido and Scott if they want a match then they can have one right now with Charlie Ranck and Pete Fyle.

Ranck and Fyle

[....Jabs by Escondido and a whip to the corner, charge and Escondido misses the boot.  Ranck sends him to the floor. Fyle beats down Escondido and tosses him back in.  Ranck gets the butterfly lock and delivers knees to Escondido.   Suplex by Ranck and cover for 2.  Ranck goes with the bear hug on the mat, Escondido fights to his feet, boot by Ranck, to the corner and a clothesline connects.  Uppercut by Ranck drops Escondido.  Off the ropes and a splash gets 2.  Back to the seated bear hug, Escondido again tries to work back to his feet. He finally elbows out of the hold but gets whipped to the corner. Elbow by Escondido, to the corner and he moves, and then clotheslines Ranck.  Another shot to the throat, face buster to Ranck and Escondido is hyped.  Ranck too close to the corner and gets elbowed by Kevin Scott.  Clothesline by Escondido as Justin Sufferable distracted Ranck. Scott DDT's Fyle on the floor.  Escondido hooks in the cattle mutilation and Ranck taps.

WINNER: 'No Frills' Chris Escondido and 'American Citizen' Kevin Scott @ 9:36

----------------

• 
• The Kallisten Coliseum, 13 May 2010

• Lazarus v John Eric Peter Watson
• The referee for this match is Joel Hortega, and the rules are Standard Match.

• Mark “The Explosive” O’Neal v Crow
• The referee for this match is Matt Boettcher, and the rules are Standard Match.

• Kelly Flawless v Christopher America©
• The referee for this match is Rick “Even” Stevens, and the rules are Last Man Standing.
• HOFC

• Scottywood v Max Kael
• The referee for this match is Matt Boettcher, and the rules are Standard Match.

• Black Mamba v MPlow©
• The referee for this match is Joel Hortega, and the rules are Standard Match.
• ICON Title

• Simon Sparrow v Aceldama©
• The referee for this match is Bethany Sparrow, and the rules are Lumber Jack Match.
• World Title

HIGH OCTANE WRESTLING

———————

Upcoming PCW Events:
Wednesday May 12th @ Rock Springs, WY – Rock Springs Skating Rink
Friday May 14th @ Ogden, UT – Neber County Arena
Saturday May 15th @ Reno, NV – Reno-Sparks Livestock Events Center
Monday May 17th @ Las Vegas, NV – Orleans Arena
Friday May 21st @ Kingman, AZ - Mohave County Fairgrounds
Saturday May 22nd @ Albuquerque, NM - Tingley Coliseum
Monday May 24th @ Amarillo, TX - Amarillo Civic Center
Wednesday May 26th @ Fort Stockton, TX - Coliseum and Civic Center
Wednesday June 2nd @ Columbus, IN - Hamilton Center Ice Arena
Friday June 4th @ Portsmouth, OH - Portsmouth Civic Center
Saturday June 5th @ Newark, OH - Lou and Gib Reese Ice Arena

----------------------------

Suave announces it's time for the main event and sends it to Kimber Marshall in the ring.

Kimber announces the challenger, 'Chicago Boss' Mark Ditka...

'Chicago Boss' Mark Ditka

Marshall then introduces the PCW Television Champion, Ken Worth- The American Trucker.

Ken Worth- The American Trucker (c) with

Tequila Sheila

[....Worth hits a spinning leg lariat on Ditka sending him to the mat.  Ditka right back up and they lockup. AT sends Ditka to the corner of the ring  double underhook piledriver right into the mat.  American Trucker covers. Ditka gets the shoulder up at 2.   Tequila Sheila in the ring...she sends Ditka to the corner of ringside.  Worth follows with a single arm DDT.  AT gives Ditka the cobra clutch suplex onto the mat.  Worth goes for the Jake Brake...got it! Worth uses an inside cradle for the pin. Davey Keels counts the pin. ...1 ...2 ...3]

WINNER AND STILL PCW TELEVISION CHAMPION: Ken Worth- The American Trucker

Rahm Emanuel

Post match, Emanuel runs out and drops an F-Bomb on Ken Worth.  Tequila Sheila swings her tequila bottle at Emanuel.  He ducks and drops an F-Bomb on Tequila Sheila.  The Angry Left Wing Bloggers come out and start stomping away at Worth.  The American Heartland Coalition runs out and a huge brawl ends the show.

————————-

Other WP Political Blog Stories:

Re-order in the Court?

Obama Picks Kagan For Supreme Court, Republican Foolery Begins

Accountability in 3, 2, 1…

Arizona v Douchebags

Elene Kagan: The “short” unknown

Modern-Day Liberalism: Politicizing our Way of Life

Other Political Blog Stories:

Obama aide defends Kagan over DADT, military recruiting

TRENDING: Inhofe comes out against Kagan

Judiciary Republicans launch YouTube channel

BP trying smaller containment dome — Baton Rouge, LA

Britain’s Extraordinary Day

Eliot Spitzer’s Comeback Trail

BP spill: From the Gulf to your house!

Post-BP spill: Drill… maybe? Drill?

John McCain No Longer “One Of Them”

Ciao Gordon Brown

Big If True: Brad Thor Says Mullah Omar Has Been Captured

Does Kagan Support a Constitutional Right To Gay Marriage? Her Implication Says No, But Her Evasion Says Yes!Hey, Socialism’s Pretty Cool Too

Joe Klein vs. Average Joe: 4/26-PCW Night of Champions

PCW Night of Champions (1 Hour)
Hack’s Rusty Nail Saloon
Wauseon, OH
Monday April 26th
Host: Johnny Suave

Johnny Suave stands in the middle of the ring with his lifesize cardboard cut-out of Shania Twain.

Crowd – PCW!…PCW!…PCW!…

Johnny Suave – HELLO AND WELCOME TO POLITICAL CHAMPIONSHIP WRESTLING!

Crowd – RAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!

Johnny Suave – I AM JOHNNY SUAVE.  THIS HOT PIECE OF CARDBOARD IS SHANIA TWAIN.  TONIGHT, WE ARE LIVE FROM HACK’S RUSTY NAIL SALOON FOR TONIGHT’S- NIGHT…OF…CHAMPIONS!”

Crowd – PCW!…PCW!…PCW!…

Johnny Suave – WE’VE GOT THREE TITLE MATCHES FOR YOU TONIGHT.

PCW Television Title Match:
The American Heartland Coalition’s Ken Worth- The American Trucker (I) (c)
vs.
Paddy O’Kennedy (D)

PCW Tag Team Title Match
Jack and Joe Schmidt of Ron Paul’s New Libertarian Army (I) (c)
vs.
‘No Frills’ Chris Escondido and ‘American Citizen’ Kevin Scott (I) of the American Heartland Coalition

PCW Title Match
Yamamoto Tanaka (D) (c)
vs.
A. Tom Bomb (R)

Johnny Suave – BUT FIRST-

Voice – HOLD ON!

The spotlight trains on another part of the bar where Time Magazine’s Joe Klein has a microphone.

Joe Klein – I warned people that reckless and inflammatory speech towards our CEO Barack Obama bordered on Seditious.  However, this ‘know-nothing’ person has chosen to disregard my admonition.

A group of people drag out someone.

Johnny Suave – WAIT!  THAT’S AVERAGE JOE!

Joe Klein – That’s right- Average Joe.   You have been found guilty of uttering
the name of our PCW CEO in an seditious manner, and so, as a blasphemer…

Group – Ooooh!

Johnny Suave – OH, COME ON!

Joe Klein - …you are to undergo sensitivity training via…

Group – Yesssss?

Joe Klein – …CATTLE PROD!

Group – AHHHHHHHH!

Average Joe – Look. I– I’d exercised my right of free speech and said to my wife, I totally disagree with Obama’s policies.’

Group – Oooooh!

Joe Klein – Blasphemy! He’s said it again!

Group – Yes! Yes, he did! He did!…

Joe Klein – Did you hear him?!

Group - Yes! Yes, we did! We did!…

Someone throws a stone and hits Average Joe.

Average Joe – HEY!

[silence]

Joe Klein – Say, are there any conservative, Right-Wing Fundamentalists here today?

Group – No. No. No. No…socialized medicine…tax the rich…

Joe Klein – Very well.  By virtue of the authority vested in me–

Outraged liberal cattle prods Average Joe.

Average Joe – Oww! Lay off! We haven’t started yet!

Joe Klein - Come on! Who did that? Who did that? Come on.

Group – He did! He! He. He. Him. Him. Him. Him.  He did.

Culprit – Sorry. I thought we’d started.

Joe Klein - Go to the back.

Culprit - Oh, dear.

Joe Klein - Always one, isn’t there? Now, where were we?

Average Joe - Look. I don’t think it ought to be blasphemy, just criticizing
‘Obama’.

Group – Oooh! He said it again! Oooh!…

Joe Klein - You’re only making it worse for yourself!

Average Joe - Making it worse?!  That’s what I think! I disagree with Obama!  I disagree with Obama!  I disagree with Obama!

Group – Oooooh!…

Joe Klein – I’m warning you. If you say ‘I disagree with Obama’ once more–

Another outraged liberal cattle prods Joe Klein.

Joe Klein – Right. Who did that?

[silence]

Joe Klein – Come on. Who did that?

Group – He! He. Him. Him. Him. Him. Him. Him.

Joe Klein – Was it you?

Culprit #2 - Yes.

Joe Klein - Right!

Culprit #2 - Well, you did say ‘I disagree with Obama’.

Group – Ah! Ooooh!…

The outraged group cattle prods Culprit #2.

Joe Klein - Stop! Stop, will you?! Stop that! Stop it!

Culprit #2 falls down unconscious.

Joe Klein – Now, look! No one is to stone anyone until I blow this whistle! Do you understand?! Even, and I want to make this absolutely clear, even if they do say ‘I don’t agree with Obama’.

Group - Ooooooh!…

Joe Klein – One…AIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEE!

The outraged group cattle prods Joe Klein.

—————-

Championship Wrestling Council

The CWC is an inter-fed currently consisting of 15 federations

—————————–

———————–

Suave introduces Kimber Marshall as she climbs into the ring to announce the first match of the night.

MATCH #1 – PCW Television Title Match
Paddy O’Kennedy (D) vs. Ken Worth- The American Trucker (I)    (c)

Kimber Marshall – This match is a one fall, twenty minute time limit for the PCW Television Title.  On his way to the ring at this time, weighing in at 245 pounds, from Boston, MA, a member of Progressive Alliance, Paddy O’Kennedy!!!

O’Kennedy climbs into the ring.

East bound and down, loaded up and truckin’,
we’re gonna do what they say can’t be done.
We’ve got a long way to go and a short time to get there.
I’m east bound, just watch ol’ “Bandit” run.

Keep your foot hard on the pedal. Son, never mind them brakes.
Let it all hang out ’cause we got a run to make.
The boys are thirsty in Atlanta and there’s beer in Texarcana.
And we’ll bring it back no matter what it takes.

Kimber Marshall – and his opponent, weighing in at 225 pounds, from Gary, Indiana a member of American Heartland Coalition accompanied by Tequila Sheila he holds the PCW Television Title title belt, Ken Worth- The American Trucker!!!

East bound and down, loaded up and truckin’,
we’re gonna do what they say can’t be done.
We’ve got a long way to go and a short time to get there.
I’m east bound, just watch ol’ “Bandit” run.

East bound and down, loaded up and truckin’,
we’re gonna do what they say can’t be done.
We’ve got a long way to go and a short time to get there.
I’m east bound, just watch ol’ “Bandit” run.

American Trucker gets nailed with a charging axhandle bodyblock from Paddy O’Kennedy.  Worth pokes O’Kennedy in the eyes.  Worth with a neck snap.  Worth Russian Leg Sweeps O’Kennedy!  They lockup.  Worth whips O’Kennedy to the corner of the ring.  O’Kennedy goes top rope and hits a split legged moonsault on American Trucker.  Worth picks O’Kennedy up in a fireman’s carry and flapjacks him.  Worth goes up top.   The American Trucker skies with a shooting star press and hooks the leg. Referee Davey Keels makes the count. …1 …2…Paddy O’Kennedy kicks out.  Worth stays on the offensive and latches on the camel clutch on O’Kennedy.  Davey Keels asks O’Kennedy if he quits…Worth breaks the hold.  Ken Worth- The American Trucker sends Paddy O’Kennedy to ringside.  Tequila Sheila whacks O’Kennedy repeatedly with her blender.  Running neckbreaker drop by The American Trucker.   Worth lays in the punches on O’Kennedy.   Both men move back into the ring.

Worth catches O’Kennedy with a vertical suplex.  Another suplex by Worth and he heads up top for a diving headbutt, and O’Kennedy moves out of the way.   O’Kennedy follows with a DDT and covers.  1…2…Worth kicks out.  Rahm Emanuel runs down to help and tosses a chair into the ring.   O’Kennedy hits a triple-jump legdrop for another two count.  O’Kennedy and Emanuel set up a table between the apron and the barricade, but Worth is able to attack and leaves O’Kennedy laying on the table.  The American Trucker goes up top, but O’Kennedy crotches him and ‘ranas him off.  That gets two when Tequila Sheila breaks it up.   A “table” chant goes up as O’Kennedy applies a chinlock, but Worth breaks it with an electric chair. Sheila and SNAFU, who’s joined the fray, load the table into the ring and Worth lays O’Kennedy across it.  Worth heads to the top rope and O’Kennedy moves.  Worth goes ass-first through the table and O’Kennedy tries to finish, but they’re too close to the ropes and Worth gets out at two. O’Kennedy applies half a camel clutch and gets nothing with it when SNAFU missile drop kicks him.  O’Kennedy drills SNAFU with a chair and then Worth.  He then kicks him across the face, and Worth hits the chair on the way down.

Worth takes a walk to compose himself and ends up in the stands.  O’Kennedy dives from the ring to give us the “PCW” chant.  Worth & O’Kennedy then walk around the crowd while intermittently punching.  Worth drives O’Kennedy into the barricade and then into the apron, then slams him on the floor.  O’Kennedy gets another chair and cracks Worth across the face.  Springboard splash from out of the ring and onto Worth for two.  Another table shows up courtesy of SNAFU.  Worth chops O’Kennedy down and then adjusts the table while O’Kennedy lies there and watches him patiently. O’Kennedy clotheslines Worth on top of the table and drops a leg from the top rope to shatter the table and get a two count. In comes another chair and O’Kennedy tries a triple-jump moonsault.  Worth moves, then powerbombs O’Kennedy.  Sunset flip gets two.  Superplex by Worth gets only a two-count when Emanuel and Hillary Clinton(???) break the count.  Another chair shows up and Worth tries to use it, but O’Kennedy gets to it first to take Worth down.  Arabian press gets two. O’Kennedy heads to the top rope and Tequila Sheila crotches him.

Worth climbs up and hits an over the shoulder stomachbreaker.   Worth picks O’Kennedy up.  Emanuel and Clinton hit the ring.  SNAFU goes off the top rope and nails both with a missile drop kick.   Worth hits the Jake Brake and uses an inside cradle to pin Paddy O’Kennedy. Referee Davey Keels makes the count. …1 …2 …3

WINNER AND STILL PCW TELEVISION CHAMPION: Ken Worth- The American Trucker @ 16:09

Johnny Suave – The American Trucker defends and…WATCH OUT!

The PCW Champion Yamamoto Tanaka (D) runs down and nearly takes Ken Worth’s head off with a lariat.  Tanaka, Emanuel, and HRC stomp away while Gary Treehugger (D) and Chicago Boss Mark Ditka (D) attack Tequila Sheila and SNAFU.

The newest member of the American Heartland Coalition, Charlie Blackwell, and his valet/fiancee Kenzie Blair, race down with a steel-folding chair.  Blackwell clobbers Treehugger and Ditka.  Blair goes low bridge on HRC.  Emanuel catches Kenzie and drops an F-Bomb on her.  Dave the Mechanic (I) joins in and jolts Emanuel with a pair of live jumper cables.

——————-

Backstage

A. Tom Bomb with General R.C. Patton and his sister Daisy Cutter-Bomb.  Patton starts out by saying, “A good plan, violently executed now, is better than a perfect plan next week.”  He adds: “America loves a winner, and will not tolerate a loser, this is why A. Tom Bomb will win the PCW title tonight” and “It’s the unconquerable soul of man, not the nature of the weapon he uses, that insures victory.”  Patton predicts tonight is the night that A-Bomb finally breaks through.

————————-

Upcoming PCW Events:
Wednesday April 28th @ Battle Creek, MI – Kellogg Arena
Friday April 30th @ Muskegon, MI – L.C. Walker Arena
Saturday May 1st @ Traverse City, MI – Howe Arena
Monday May 3rd @ Marquette, MI – Lakeview Arena
Friday May 7th @ Fargo, ND – South Sports Arena
Saturday May 8th @ Rapid City, SD – Rushmore Plaza Civic Center
Monday May 10th @ Cheyenne, WY – Cheyenne Arena
Wednesday May 12th @ Rock Springs, WY – Rock Springs Skating Rink
Friday May 14th @ Ogden, UT – Neber County Arena
Saturday May 15th @ Reno, NV – Reno-Sparks Livestock Events Center
Monday May 17th @ Las Vegas, NV – Orleans Arena

———————-

———————

MATCH #2 – PCW Tag Team Title Match
‘No Frills’ Chris Escondido and Kevin Scott (I) from the American Heartland Coalition vs. Jack Schmidt and Joe Schmidt (I) of Ron Paul’s New Libertarian Army (c)

Kimber Marshall – This match is a one fall, twenty minute time limit for the PCW Tag Team Title.  On their way to the ring at this time, former PCW Tag Team Champions, and representing the American Heartland Coalition- ‘No Frills’ Chris Escondido and Kevin Scott!!!

‘No Frills’ Chris Escondido and Kevin Scott come to the ring.

Kimber Marshall – and their opponents…

Aimee Allen’s ‘Revolution’ begins to play.

Wake up! Wake up!
Good morning America!
Rise and Shine.

Rise and Shine!

Ron Paul! Save our constitutional rights
Ron Paul! We’re not gonna give up the fight
Ron Paul! Start a revolution
and break down illegal institutions

We don’t want no war no more
bring our boys home to our shores
We don’t want big government
Or the Bilderberg group that pays for it

The Federal Id means a police state
and Mr. Jefferson’s rolling in his grave
when our names turn to numbers like 666
according to the gospel on implantable chips

Ron Paul! Save our constitutional rights
Ron Paul! We’re not gonna give up the fight
Ron Paul! Start a revolution
and break down illegal institutions

Ron Paul leads Jack Schmidt and Jim Schmidt to the ring with their entourage.

Kimber Marshall – Representing Ron Paul’s New Libertarian Army and the PCW Tag Team Champions- Jack and Joe Schmidt!”

The Patriot Act took our liberties
And there’s no judge and no jury
Tapping our phones, breaking down our doors
waging on the people a civil war!
We work 3 jobs and bring home no pay
The IRS takes it all away
and we struggle, slave to pay the rent
So, Ron Paul for President.

Jack Schmidt and Joe Schmidt walk to the ring, both holding up high the PCW Tag Team Title belts.

Jack Schmidt and ‘No Frills’ Chris Escondido to begin.  They lockup.  Jack sends Escondido to the corner of the ring and tags in Joe.   Escondido works an arm wrench to Joe. and tags in ‘American Citizen’ Kevin Scott.   Escondido climbs up to the top rope and splashes Joe!  Scott follows with an Ace Crusher.   Scott hits  a corkscrew legdrop on Joe and makes the tag to Escondido.  Joe suplexes Escondido.  Joe tags in Jack who applies an arm wrench to Escondido.  Short lariat by Jack.  Joe tosses in a chair.  Jack puts the chair down on Escondido…. Jack jumps up and splashes the chair!!  They lockup.  Jack with an Irish whip, reversal, Escondido sends Jack to the corner of the ring and tags Scott in.  The American Citizen bulldog’s Jack Schmidt!  Escondido slams Jack’s head into the turnbuckle and tags in Scott.  Jack escapes and tags in Joe.

Escondido dropkicks Joe Schmidt to the knee.  Escondido gets the advantage with a low blow and a Russian legsweep.  Jack tries to intervene, but Scott is all over him and they brawl on the floor while the legal men keep it in the ring.  Jim Schmidt yanks Scott away and he gets chased around for a while until Jack attacks Scott with a chair.  Meanwhile, Joe misses a charge and also winds up on the floor.   Jack takes out Escondido with the chair, but Scott comes back with a bulldog in the chair’s general vicinity.  The action spills into the crowd. Escondido gets fired up and they start walking around through the crowd while throwing punches.  Escondido gets his hands on Jim Schmidt and starts slamming his head into the barricade.

Joe intervenes to stop him and Escondido throws headbutts. Scott takes out Joe with a chair and Escondido launches a chunk of barricade into the ring.  Scott hits Jack with a chair and he falls on the barricade.  Scott sets the barricade up in the corner and Escondido lays a chair on it. Jack and Joe both get whipped into it, and Joe just has it dropped on top of him with force for good measure. Jack gets bodyslammed on top of the pile.  Back inside the ring, Joe goes insane and just mauls Escondido with a chair and targets his knee, which makes Escondido easy prey for the spinning toehold.  Scott stops Joe from getting the submission and chokes him. Suddenly, Jack drills him with a camera, and Joe DDTs him for a two-count.

Jack sets up a table and Joe suplexes Scott through it.   Joe pulls Scott up and whips him to the corner.   Joe climbs to the top rope and Jack hands him a brick to put in the back of his trunks.  Joe jumps off and hits the Schmidt Brick.   Escondido looks to be out cold! Joe covers ‘Scott. Davey Keels counts. …1 …2 …3

WINNER AND STILL PCW TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS: Jack and Joe Schmidt at 17:21

———————–

Earl Woods (Voice) – Tiger, I am more prone to be inquisitive to promote discussion.

Tiger stares forward.

Earl Woods (Voice) – I want to find out what your thinking was.

Tiger stares forward.

Earl Woods (Voice) – I wanna find out what your feelings are…

Tiger stares forward.

Earl Woods (Voice) -…and did you learn anything?

Tiger stares forward.

*Def Leppard’s Rock, Rock Til You Drop begins to play*

Hold onto your hat, hold onto your heart
Ready, get set to tear this place apart
Don’t need a ticket, only place in town
That’ll take you up to heaven and never bring you down
Anything goes! Anything goes!

Tiger Woods (mouths): Oh s***!

He takes off running.  The Extreme Equalizer Whiskey Tango Foxtrot chases after him with a steel folding chair.

Women to the left, Women to the right
There to entertain and take you thru the night
So grab a little heat and come along with me
‘Cause your mama don’t mind what your mama don’t see
Anything goes! Anything goes!

WTF catches up with Tiger and drops him with a steel chairshot.  Then he delivers a second chairshot…

Tiger Woods: OWWWW!

and a third…

Tiger Woods: OWWWW!

Rock! Rock! till you drop
Rock! Rock! never stop
Rock! Rock! till you drop
I say Rock! Rock! to the top

Narrator: Brought to you by Nike who says…Just Do It!

Tiger Woods: Don’t do it…don’t do it…

*WHAP*

Tiger Woods: OWWWW!

————————-

Upcoming PCW Events:
Wednesday April 28th @ Battle Creek, MI – Kellogg Arena
Friday April 30th @ Muskegon, MI – L.C. Walker Arena
Saturday May 1st @ Traverse City, MI – Howe Arena
Monday May 3rd @ Marquette, MI – Lakeview Arena
Friday May 7th @ Fargo, ND – South Sports Arena
Saturday May 8th @ Rapid City, SD – Rushmore Plaza Civic Center
Monday May 10th @ Cheyenne, WY – Cheyenne Arena
Wednesday May 12th @ Rock Springs, WY – Rock Springs Skating Rink
Friday May 14th @ Ogden, UT – Neber County Arena
Saturday May 15th @ Reno, NV – Reno-Sparks Livestock Events Center
Monday May 17th @ Las Vegas, NV – Orleans Arena

———————-

MATCH #3 – PCW Title Match
A.Tom Bomb (R) w/General R.C. Patton and Daisy Cutter-Bomb vs. Yamamoto Tanaka (D) w/Reika Kisaurgi

Kimber Marshall – This match is a one fall sixty minute time limit for the PCW Title title.   On his way to the ring at this time, weighing in at 275 pounds, from Roswell, New Mexico a member of the Republicans accompanied by General R.C. Patton and Daisy Cutter-Bomb, A.Tom Bomb!!!

A-Bomb walks to the ring with General Patton and Daisy.

Kimber Marshall – And his opponent, weighing in at 350 pounds, from Nagano, Japan. He represents the Democrats and is accompanied by Reika Kisuargi and he is PCW Champion, Yamamoto Tanaka!!!

Tanaka and Kisuargi comes to the ring.

A Bomb opens up a chair…Tanaka is thrown into the ropes…Drop Toe Hold onto the open chair!  A-Bomb with a leg drop.  Tanaka rakes the eyes and then facebusters A-Bomb.  A-Bomb hooks Tanaka and crashes him down with a Double Underhook Powerbomb on the chair!  A-Bomb puts the chair on Yamamoto Tanaka’s head…Leg drop on the chair!  Tanaka is bleeding! Davey Keels counts. …1 …2 Tanaka kicks out.  A-Bomb whacks Tanaka with the chair…he goes up top… A Bomb missile dropkicks the chair into his face!  Cover…1…2…Reika Kisaurgi with the save.  Democratic leader Tim Kaine, Rahm Emanuel, and Hillary Clinton run down and pull Tanaka out of the ring.  Kisaurgi reaches into her trunks…foreign object…and jabs it into A-Bomb’s forehead.  He’s bleeding now.  Both men are bloody and brawling on the floor. A-Bomb atomic drops Tanaka on the barricade and grabs a strap.  He smashes Tanaka’s face with the buckle and then chokes him out.  He uses the belt to whip him into the barricade and then just cracks it across Tanaka’s back as hard as he possibly can.

A-Bomb goes back to choking Tanaka and then ties him to the bottom rope. A-Bomb boots the piss out of Tanaka and then frees him to go for a piledriver.  Ranck and Fyle (D) run in and tackle A-Bomb before he can piledrive Tanaka on the floor.  Daisy Cutter-Bomb jumps in.  She waffles both Ranck and Fyle with a chair.  Hy Drogen Bomb (R) now involved.  He Hydrogen Power Bombs Fyle through a table.  Daisy hits the Daisy Cutter-Powerbomb on Ranck.  A-Bomb continues pummeling Tanaka down in the corner.  Tanaka punches A-Bomb. A-Bomb gets pissed and is able to cut off the comeback from that position with a low-blow.  He drops about a hundred knees into Tanaka’s balls to drive his point home, and the referee winds up getting bumped as Tanaka mounts some offense.  A-Bomb seizes the opportunity by just DDTing the referee and going after Tanaka’s balls some more, but Tanaka anticipates and sends A-Bomb into the post. The lights suddenly go out in Hack’s Rusty Nail Saloon, and when they come back it, it’s J.D. Hayworth (R-Arizona) with a trash can to Tanaka’s head. He murders Tanaka with the can and A-Bomb goes for the pin, but Tanaka still won’t die. A-Bomb has a temper tantrum and stomps the referee’s head.

Tanaka mounts another comeback when the lights suddenly go out again…and now it’s John McCain (R-Arizona) blasting the hell out of Tanaka and killing him with a steel-folding chair. Hayworth offers a handshake.  McCain accepts…and then clotheslines Hayworth and walks away.  A-Bomb throws punches again and goes for a slam, but Tanaka counters it and goes for his own DDT…and the lights go out again.

And it’s Marco Rubio (R-Florida) this time!  Rubio blinds Tanaka with hairspray, and Charlie Crist (R?-Florida) runs in to get a catfight with Rubio.  A-Bomb goes for a piledriver on Crist, but a low blow from Crist turn the tide.  DDT gives Tanaka the advantage.  Tanaka plants A-Bomb through a table with a Rock bottom!  Tanaka  locks up with A-Bomb and sends him to the corner of the ring.  Tanaka knee drops A-Bomb  from the top rope! Tanaka covers. Davey Keels counts. …1 …2 A-Bomb kicks out. Tanaka drags A- Bomb to the floor.  Tanaka chokes A.Tom Bomb with a microphone cable.   Tanaka chops A-Bomb and hits a tiger suplex.  Tanaka throws A-Bomb into the ring.  Tanaka clotheslines A Bomb. Tanaka pulls A-Bomb up to the top turnbuckle.  He leaps and hits the Japanese Super Destroyer from the top rope!  A-Bomb is out cold! Yamamoto Tanaka covers A.Tom Bomb. The ref counts. …1 …2 …3

WINNER AND STILL PCW CHAMPION: Yamamoto Tanaka at 20:01

——————–

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POLITICAL HOT TOPICS: Tuesday, April 27, 2010

Tanaka Destroys Blackwell: PCW Extreme Political TV on P-SPAN

PCW Extreme Political TV on P-SPAN (1 Hour)
Douglas N. Everett Arena
Concord, NH
Monday April 5th
Host: Johnny Suave

The show starts with a replay of Jill-Berg after she was assaulted at PCW/MVW Weapons of Mass Political Destruction.

Policeman: “Ms. Berg?  Ms. Berg.  It’s time!”

THUMP

THUMP

THUMP-THUMP-THUMP

THUMP

THUMP

THUMP-THUMP-THUMP

[The Policeman takes a step back and then kicks down the door.  Inside the room lies Jill-Berg, bloodied, unconscious, and sprawled out on the floor.  Next to her, Berg's assistant Reika is also knocked out and bleeding.  Across the room, Berg's personal assistant Jerry is half on, half off a chair, knocked out, and also bleeding. ]

Policeman: “CALL THE PARAMEDICS!”

Suave: “HOLY CRAP!  SOMEONE LAID OUT JILL-BERG AND HER ASSISTANTS!”

Then a replay of last week’s attack on Reika by Jill-Berg.

THUMP

THUMP

THUMP-THUMP-THUMP

THUMP

THUMP

THUMP-THUMP-THUMP

[The video screen goes to just outside a dressing room in the back. A police escort is waiting at the door. One of the policemen knocks on the door.]

Policeman – Ms. Berg. It’s time.

[Jill Berg and her five bodyguards stride out from her dressing room with a purpose.]

Johnny Suave – IT’S JILL-BERG!  SHE’S GOT A SCORE TO SETTLE WITH REIKA FOR SELLING OUT TO THE DEMOCRATS FOR TANAKA’S SERVICES!

[Jill climbs into the ring and tells her bodyguards to hold Reika up.  Two bodyguards pull her from the mat and stand her up.  Jill takes a step forward and whirls around- nailing a spinning heel kick flush on Reika's jaw.  Reika slides to the mat unconscious.]

Johnny Suave – JILL-BERG JUST KO’D HER FORMER ASSOCIATE REIKA!

Reika is in the ring and calls out Jill-Berg.

THUMP

THUMP

THUMP-THUMP-THUMP

THUMP

THUMP

THUMP-THUMP-THUMP

[The video screen goes to just outside a dressing room in the back. A police escort is waiting at the door. One of the policemen knocks on the door.]

Policeman – Ms. Berg. It’s time.

Jill Berg and her five bodyguards answer the call and head to the ring.

Reika tells Jill-Berg that it’s not her fault she was injured at the Weapons of Mass Political Destruction Pay Per View.  All she knows that the paychecks stopped coming and she need the cash.  The Democrats made her an offer she couldn’t refuse.

George Soros, major Democrat financial backer, walks out with Nancy Pelosi, Harry Reid, Steny Hoyer, and the PCW Champion Yamamoto Tanaka.  They are followed by the Angry Left Wing Bloggers Arianna Huffington, Jane Hamsher, Eric Alterman and MSNBC’s Keith Olbermann, ‘Hardball’ Chris Matthews, Rachel Maddow, and Ed Schultz.

Reika tells Berg that she delivered Tanaka to the Democrats thanks to a…sizeable contribution from Mr. Soros.

Jill-Berg responds by telling Reika she stopped paying her because she didn’t do her job in protecting her.  Reika laughs and observes that Tanaka listens to her now.  She wonders aloud just what is stopping her from having Tanaka finish off Jill-Berg once and for all?  Berg responds, “This!”

Michael Steele, Eric Cantor, Mitch McConnell, John Boehner, A-Bomb and H-Bomb walk out with the Right Wing Crusaders, Rush Limbaugh, Ann Coulter, Laura Ingraham and Fox News’s Sean Hannity, Bill O’Reilly, and Glenn Beck.  Berg: “Meet my NEW friends.”  Jill-Berg notes that she won’t be cleared to return to action until April 15th but when she does get cleared, she plans on making history, with the full support of the Republicans, by becoming the first woman to win the PCW Title!  Berg also notes that she can take full advantage of the ‘loose rules’ in PCW that she couldn’t in Missouri Valley Wrestling.

Johnny Suave: “Well, this is very interesting.”  It quickly gets more interesting.

‘No Frills’ Chris Escondido, ‘American Citizen’ Kevin Scott, and ‘Not Just Unbearable…Not Just Intolerable…He is’ Justin Sufferable walk out.  Scott states that unlike the Democrats and Republicans who answer to their big money supporters, the American Heartland Coalition is of the people, by the people, and FOR THE PEOPLE!  The rest of the AHC walks out: Dave the Mechanic, Ken Worth- The American Trucker, Tequila Sheila, and SNAFU.  Escondido then introduces an old friend…

Replay from last week’s show…

A steaming Nancy Pelosi and Harry Reid stride to the ring.

Nancy Pelosi – WAIT A MINUTE! WAAAAIT A MINUTE!  You put that sign down right now!

The fan refuses.

Nancy Pelosi – I said put that sign down.

The fan flips Pelosi off.

Escondido says that the fan just isn’t a fan- he’s former PCW Wrestler Average Joe!  Scott adds that he and Escondido are going to focus on regaining the tag team belts and introduces the newest and youngest member of the American Heartland Coalition…19 year old Charlie Blackwell!  Blackwell and his 18 year old girlfriend/valet Kenzie Blair, holding on to her ‘Wrestling Manager for Dummies’ book, walk out and join the AHC.

Nancy Pelosi yanks the microphone away from ring announcer Kimber Marshall…

…and addresses Blackwell.  She tells him that he was offered the ‘chance of a lifetime to tag with a great champion Yamamoto Tanaka’ and threw it away on an ‘independent movement that may have a couple titles but no real power within PCW.’  Since Pelosi is President of the PCW Competition Committee, she makes a match between Tanaka and Blackwell tonight.  Pelosi then books Escondido and Scott against the Democrats main tag team Charlie Ranck and Pete Fyle and then Paddy O’Kennedy (D) versus the American Heartland Coalition’s, and PCW Television Champion, Ken Worth-The American Trucker.

Then Hank Johnson walks out and he’s very concerned.  With the amount of people standing inside the ring, he fears that the ring will collapse downwards and suck the entire arena down into the molten hot magma below and start a catastrophic chain reaction that will destroy the planet!

Def Leppard’s “Rock, Rock Til You Drop” blares and the Extreme Enforcer Whiskey Tango Foxtrot returns  WTF runs to the ring, grabs Johnson by the throat, and choke slams him.

———————

Coming up in three weeks!  PCW Night of Champions, live from Hack’s Rusty Nail Saloon in Wauseon, Ohio.

All three titles will be on the line.  Other special matches will be booked.

Monday April 25th- PCW Night of Champions.

————————

PCW RANKINGS

PCW WORLD CHAMPION: Yamamoto Tanaka (Democrat)

PCW TELEVISION CHAMPION: Ken Worth-American Trucker (American Heartland Coalition)

PCW TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS:  Jack and Jim Schmidt (Ron Paul’s New Libertarian Army)

SINGLES CONTENDERS:
#1- Khalid-El (Axis of Evil)
#2- Kevin Scott (American Heartland Coalition)
#3- SNAFU (American Heartland Coalition)
#4- Bird ‘The Mark’ Ridfych (Independent)
#5- Newt Tron Bomb (Republican)

TAG TEAM CONTENDERS:
#1- ‘No Frills’ Chris Escondido and ’American Citizen’ Kevin Scott (American Heartland Coalition)
#2- Big Oil and Big Electric (Public Utilities)
#3- A. Tom Bomb and Hy Drogen Bomb (Republican)
#4- Ranck and Fyle (Democrat)
#5- Raving Rednecks Locke and Loade (Republican)

———————

MATCH #1
‘No Frills’ Chris Escondido and ‘American Citizen’ Kevin Scott (I) vs. Ranck and Fyle (D)

Pete Fyle and ‘American Citizen’ Kevin Scott to start.  Lock up in the middle of the ring.  Fyle gets the advantage whips the American Citizen to the corner of the ring.  Flying elbow by Fyle and a quick tag to Charlie Ranck.  Ranck hits a kneeling headbutt to Scott’s groin.  Ranck lays the boots to Scott.  Scott catches the boot and flips Ranck backwards.  He tags in Escondido.  Ranck with an armdrag takedown into an arm grapevine.  Fyle on the top turnbuckle…flying sitdown splash.  Ranck covers.  Escondido kicks out.  Low bridge by Escondido on Ranck and he tags Scott back in.  Scott lays some right hands into Ranck.  Then turns and sends Fyle flying out of the ring.  Ranck rakes the eyes.  Elbow drop by Ranck.  Ranck with a corkscrew legdrop.  He covers.  Scott kicks out at two.

Scott tags Escondido back in.  Ranck tags in Fyle.  Fyle launches himself at Escondido and hits the flying elbow.  Ranck throws a chair in.  *WHAP*  Escondido reels back into the corner.  Chair on the mat.  Fyle bulldogs Escondido on the chair.  Fyle goes up top.  Splash on the chair.  Fyle covers.  Escondido kicks out again.  Scott in and grabs the chair.  *WHAP* He nails Fyle with the chair.  Escondido with the gut wrench powerbomb onto the chair.  Irish whip to the ropes by Escondido.  He chokes Fyle with his boot.  Scott in with a table.  Escondido powerbombs Fyle through the table.  Ranck in and walks into a chairshot by Scott.

Escondido slams the chair into Pete Fyle’s face!! Fyle is busted open.  He rolls him over and grabs the leg.  CATTLE MUTILATION!  Fyle quickly taps out.

WINNER: ‘No Frills’ Chris Escondido and ‘American Citizen’ Kevin Scott @ 11:05

Backstage, Nancy Pelosi is pissed.  She tells Paddy O’Kennedy that he’d better come back with the PCW Television Title.

Charlie Blackwell cuts a promo…actually his girlfriend Kenzie Blair does.  Blair calls Pelosi the poster child for everything wrong with PCW.  Blackwell tries to get her to tone it down.  Blair calls Pelosi ‘Tom DeLay in a skirt.’  Again Blackwell tries to get her to tone it down.  Blair says the Democrats can’t even stand up to their own special interest groups.  We were promised change.  We were promised that things were going to be different.  What did we get?  The same ol’-same ol’.  Earmarks out of control.  Pressing issues that need to be addressed don’t because both parties don’t dare go against their big money special interest groups.  So we continue to get the same old gridlock because the Democrats have proven themselves to be just as untrustworthy as the Republicans.  Again, Blackwell tries to get his girlfriend to settle down.  Blair then says that it doesn’t matter how much bigger and stronger Yamamoto Tanaka is, Charlie Blackwell is still going to kick his ass.  Blackwell literally has to drag her off camera.

MATCH #2 for the PCW Television Title
Paddy O’Kennedy (D) vs. Ken Worth- The American Trucker (c) with Tequila Sheila (I)

Worth starts with a leg lariat and takes O’Kennedy off his feet.  O’Kennedy grabs Worth’s head and DDT’s him.  O’Kennedy drops the fist.  Worth responds with a headlock and takes O’Kennedy down.  O’Kennedy fights his way out with a couple of back elbows and then a right hand.  The American Trucker responds with an atomic drop.  Standing drop kick to O’Kennedy’s back sends him over the top rope to the floor.  Tequila Sheila grabs her blender and whaps O’Kennedy with it.  Worth on the top rope…elbow drop to O’Kennedy sends him sprawling.  Now Worth with a chair.  He blasts O’Kennedy several times with it before returning to the ring.

O’Kennedy barely beats the count.  Worth lifts him up…JAKE BRAKE!  Worth covers…one…two…three.

WINNER AND STILL PCW TELEVISION CHAMPION: Ken Worth-The American Trucker @ 5:11

Backstage, Pelosi is furious.  She tells Reika Kisaurgi to have Yamamoto Tanaka make an example out of Charlie Blackwell.  Reika nods and leaves.

———————-

Championship Wrestling Council

The CWC is an inter-fed currently consisting of 14 federations

MATCH #3 – Non-Title Match
Charlie Blackwell w/ Kenzie Blair (I) vs. Yamamoto Tanaka (c) w/Reika Kisaurgi (D)

Tanaka roars out of his corner and lariats Blackwell.  Tanaka lays the boots to Blackwell repeatedly.  Kenzie Blair screams at Tanaka.   The PCW Champion with a blatant chokehold.  The referee tries to make Tanaka break the hold but gets thrown down.  Tanaka whips Blackwell hard into the corner.  Tanaka whips him again to the other corner.  Reika in the ring with a table.  She starts to set it up.  Kenzie Blair runs in and bulldogs Reika.  Tanaka takes Blair by the hair and whips her into the corner with Blackwell.  He runs…BIG SPLASH on Blackwell and Blair.  Tanaka takes Blackwell to the top rope…JAPANESE SUPER DESTROYER THROUGH THE TABLE!  Tanaka covers.  One…two…three.

WINNER: PCW Champion Yamamoto Tanaka @ 4:46

Post match, Tanaka drags Blackwell back up to the top rope again.  A SECOND JAPANESE SUPER DESTROYER!  Blair back up.  She nails Tanaka with her book- Wrestling Manager for Dummies.  Tanaka drags her up to the top rope.  Immediately Escondido and Scott run out with the rest of the American Heartland Coalition.  Rahm Emanuel leads the Democrats out and Eric Cantor charges out with the Republicans.  Huge scrum in the ring ends the show.

————————

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